“Sylar,” a cold voice said, freezing me in place. “A word? In my office?”
Liam looked at me with a curious look. “Have fun,” he whispered. “Be safe, use a condom.” I glared at him. He patted my back before walking away.
I slowly turned around and looked into the frigid, hard eyes of Professor Castien.
Almost on instinct, my heart sped up a beat.
Liam thought I was insane for having a crush on him. I also thought I was a little insane for liking him. Because all the students were apparently really scared of him. And so were the other professors. He was a harsh teacher, but he was damn good at his job. That came off as mean and ruthless to certain people.
Which I never understood until this very moment.
His face was expressionless and flat at the moment and yet by the way he carried himself chilled me to my very core. Okay, maybe he was a little bit scary.
Just a little.
I don’t say anything, but I shuffled into his office, keeping my eyes anywhere but his face. I sat down on one of the chairs in front of his desk. There could’ve been a lot of reasons why he called me into his office and none of them were what I was hoping for.
He shut the door and sits down in front of me, folding his hands neatly in his lap, peering down at me. “Do you want to fail my class?” he asked thinly.
Blunt. Just right to the point.
My mouth was dry and I wasn’t sure how to respond to that. “No.” Then after a pause, I added, “Professor.”
“Then what the fuck do you think you’re doing?” he said evenly. My eyes widened. His face remained impassive but his words were harsh. I didn’t think I’d hear the rigid Professor Castien say the word fuck.
What was probably worse was that I so wanted to hear him say it again.
“I-I...what?” I stammered, unsure if I heard him correctly.
“What are you doing in my class if you clearly can’t think with your head?” he extended bluntly.
My eyes widened. Was he just bullying me now? “If there’s anything I could do, professor,” I said quietly. “I’ll try anything to fix my grade.”
Something flashed in his eyes that I couldn’t recognize. His expression turned colder than the last and I forced myself not to shudder under the intensity of his stare. “Take my class seriously, or drop it. But I don’t have time for students like you taking my course.”
What. The. Fuck.
I wasn’t technically failing yet, but I was so close that any tipping point would mean that I had an F for the semester. Which I could not afford. I wasn’t stupid. I did relatively well in my other classes. But whether it was because it was Castien’s class or that I just always sucked at literature, I wasn’t doing great. But I wasn’t even failing, and he seemed extremely irritated by me. And hell, I was pretty fucking sure I did not have the worst grade in his class and he was singling me out. For what? I had no clue.
“I’m sorry, what do you mean by students like me?”
He scowled. “A dumb pretty boy that thinks he can get through college by sucking cock.”
I might be a little vain, but the only thing I first absorbed from that was that Castien called me pretty. Then the rest of his words sank in. I inhaled a slow breath, pretending that sentence alone didn’t get me hot and bothered. I avoided the image of me getting on my knees for him and tried to focus on what exactly he was implying.
Why exactly did he think that that’s the type of person I am? I had never actually slept with anyone for a grade before. Sure, I had considered it and it wasn’t beneath me. I never claimed to be a saint, but still, I hadn’t.
Then, I realized what I had said earlier. I would try anything to fix my grade.
I mentally cringed at the words. It was a line from a really bad porno and I was now very aware that that is exactly how it came off. “I’m not dumb. I’m flattered you think I’m pretty, but I’m not dumb,” I answered, trying and failing to keep my voice steady.
Castien could’ve been shocked for all I knew but his face was unreadable. The annoyance from earlier seemed to have turned. “I doubt that,” he said, jaw tightening.
“Doubt that all you want,” I muttered. “I don’t have sex for my grades.” What the hell was I doing? Why was I fighting this?
“Really?” he challenged, leaning back in his chair. “Then you wouldn’t get on your knees if it would save your grade in my class?”
I felt a shiver run down my spine and I swallowed uneasily. This entire conversation was making me so uncomfortable, not exactly in a bad way, but still. Would I? I didn’t have the means to retake the course if I failed. And like I said, I wasn’t opposed to the idea. But I needed to pass his class. I couldn’t fail. But was I really planning on doing this? Especially after I just told him that I didn’t have sex for grades? Fuck, this was making me rethink my choice to talk back to him in the first place.
I realized I hadn’t said anything in a while. “That’s what I thought,” Castien remarked. “Go find another professor who you can spread your legs for.” The sneer in his voice made me recoil.
I could very well just walk out and report him to human resources at the university and probably get him in some miniscule amount of trouble for talking to me like this. That is if the head of human resources wasn’t also scared of him, which I doubted.
Maybe Liam was right. Maybe Castien was just a dick and I was crazy for ever liking him. I mean, that’s exactly what it seemed like now.
“It won’t work if I spread my legs for you?” Oh my fuck, what was I doing?
Castien’s lip curled and he focused me with an annoyed look. “No.”
“Are you sure?” I challenged.
It was never a matter of if they were into guys or not. Even the straight ones like a good blowjob from a guy if they were pretty enough. I had learned that over the years. Actually fucking was a choice matter, but hey, it was worth a shot.
“Leave,” he said flatly.
“Is there anything I could do?” I asked quietly, looking down at my lap and peeking up at him through my lashes. I was kind of tempted to look around to see if there were cameras panning at us. They would make good money from this cliche sex tape.
“No,” he said dryly.
“No?” I repeated softly. “Please, professor?”
“No,” he said again, scowling. “You’re pathetic, doing this for a grade.”
I bit my lip, smiling shyly. “What if it’s not for a grade?”
A hungry look flashed in his eyes. “Then you’re just pathetic.”
“What if I want it?” I murmured.
“I don’t care,” he informed me, eyes narrowing. “You’re wasting my time.”
“Please,” I breathed out.
“Are you going to beg now?” he said distastefully. His voice indicated that he seemed repulsed by the idea that someone would sink to such lows but an ever so slight glint in his eye gave me hope.
There was only so much pride I could have right now. Slowly, leaving my bag on the chair, I get up and drop to my knees in front of him.
I looked up at him, not sure what I should be expecting to see. He still had no change in expression which annoyed me but he pivots his chair towards me. “What are you doing?”
“Please let me suck you off,” I whispered. “Please, professor.” This would’ve been a lot harder for me to do if I didn’t actually want to do it. “Please,” I wet my lips, “I’ll do anything you want.”
“You’re pathetic,” he all but growled, his eyes dark and boring into mine.
“I am,” I murmured, wanting the shrink away from the harsh gaze. “But, please professor, let me suck your cock. Please...” My voice became a whine and my face was burning with the humiliation of it. But the more I watched Castien’s unmovable expression, I heard myself let out a small whimper. People were right to be scared. I really was pathetic. But feeling him looking down at me, I felt the blood rush between my legs. His hand reached down and he grasped my chin between his fingers, his thumb brushing across my bottom lip.
“You don’t know what you’re asking for, boy.”
My pulse quickened at the touch. Sparks zipped across my skin and I licked my lips, tongue barely grazing his finger. “Then show me.”
His eyes narrowed and my fingers curled. This whole situation was so fucked up and it was turning me on. “I’ll be so good for you,” I whispered, “Please, just let me get you off.”
He blinked, his jaw clenching as he glowered at me. Like I was wasting his time and I should be begging for his forgiveness instead. Despite all his words, I could tell, I was getting to him. Is this what he got off on? Humiliation and having this power over people? My throat felt dry and I wanted so much just to hide my face and never show it again. “You’re a whore,” he said, voice thick and heavy.
I was starting to see the outline of his erection and holy fuck. He was...definitely not going to fit in my mouth. “I’ll let you, you know,” I whispered, “do whatever you want to me.”
Castien’s nostrils flared and his eyes were staring at me, eyeing me. They swept across my body and I resisted the urge to shy away. It felt like I was a toy being inspected. Then again...that is essentially what I was. “You’ll regret saying that,” he tells me, his voice sounding a bit strained. That was the first sign of his breaking point.
I tried not to overthink that. Regret it? “What are you going to do to make me regret that?”
I was glad I was already on my knees. There was no way I would’ve been able to hold myself up under this had I been standing. Not with the way he was looking at me, nor with the way my thoughts were running wild with the things that I wanted him to do to me to make me eat my words.
“Fuck,” he cursed, glowering at me. I couldn’t tell what exactly he was annoyed at but if I could get under his skin, I’d take that as a good sign.
“What’s wrong, professor?” I murmured. “Scared?”
“You’re whoring yourself out for a grade,” he snarls. “How could you possibly think you’re not stupid?”
I wasn’t really doing it for a grade at the moment, but I wasn’t going to say that. I bat my lashes. “If you really think you could make me regret it,” I said, ignoring his words. “I’m all yours.”
Castien’s features folded and he seemed to compose himself into his usual cold, impenetrable gaze. “Put your hands behind your back,” he demands.
My eyes widened but slowly I placed my hands behind my back, my fingers wrapping around my forearms. Maybe he was kinkier then what I was expecting. I swallowed uneasily, meeting his eyes.
“Now open your mouth.”
My lips felt swollen and sore and my scalp tingled from his harsh grasp on my hair. The aftertaste of his cum was left at the back of my throat. Bitter, but surprisingly not unpleasant. I wiped the corner of my mouth and looked up at him, not sure what I was expecting to see.
His face was slightly flushed, but otherwise, his expression wasn’t fazed. “Get out of my office,” he says harshly.
I climbed to my feet, a little dazed. But I managed to get my stuff and find the door handle. I didn’t question his order or why, but I just left, slipping out the door.
When I climbed into Liam’s car, he looked up from his phone. “Don’t you look well-fucked,” he says dryly.
“Sorry,” I muttered, knowing he had to wait here for me the entire time.
Liam was my best friend and roommate. We’d always been friends but it was when we started college that we got close. He was one of my favorite people and overall just great to be around.
“It’s alright,” he says mildly. “How was it?”
“We didn’t have sex,” I said plainly.
“I waited like an hour and you didn’t fuck him?” he asks incredulously. “What the fuck did you do?”
“Actually, nevermind,” he backtracked, starting the car. “I don’t want to know, what you did with our professor. It’s weird.”
“It’s not weird,” I rolled my eyes. “It probably happens all the time.”
“No, it’s weird because you like him,” he drawls. “He’s probably straight.”
I snorted. “Sure.” I mean, walking into the office, I would’ve thought the same thing, but walking out after seeing how much of a reaction I was able to get from without even touching him. Sure, straight.
“I don’t know why you like him, anyways. He’s like 50 years old.”
“He’s not,” I defended. “He’s can’t be more than 40.”
“And you’re 20. Do you not see the problem? Do you think he’s attractive?” There was a hint of judgment in his voice but I didn’t blame him. I was judging myself too.
I had sucked Professor Castien’s dick. No, wait. I had begged him to let me do it. And not even for my grade. But because I had been dying to know what he tasted like.
But somehow, I could feel him holding back. What he was holding back or why I didn’t know. But I really, really, wanted to find out.
“Yes,” I respond immediately.
Liam wrinkled his nose. “Really? Are we talking about the same Professor? Castien?”
I sigh. “We already covered this.”
He smirks at me, glancing away from the road. “Have you ever considered chasing some love interests your own age?”
“I don’t want one my own age,” I whined. “I want that one.”
“Why? Is it ’cuz he’s rich?”
I frowned. “He’s rich?”
Liam looked surprised. “Yeah. He’s fucking loaded. How do you not know?”
“What do you mean?”
“Castien,” he said as if that explained everything.
“I..I don’t know what the means.”
“He’s one of the heirs to this billionaire family,” he told me. “How do you not know?”
I tried to think. “Why would I?”
“Because everyone on campus knows.”
Oh. That would explain the collective terror that Castien had over them. Rich, powerful, feared.
“Well, that’s not why.” I shrugged. “I just think he’s interesting.”
“Uh-huh,” he said skeptically. “Is that code for ‘I want to sleep with my English Professor?’”
“That too,” I admit. Because especially after today, I wanted, no, I needed him to fuck me. “But a guy like him can’t just be a boring professor. There’s more to him. I want to know.”
Liam pretended to gag. “Okay, you’re crazy.”
“For what?” I ask. “Liking someone?”
“No. For liking him. He’s an asshole to his students. I don’t think there’s much more than that.”
I didn’t quite disagree with him. Castien was a jerk. “But he’s a good professor.”
Liam was silent after that. Because I was right.
When he was teaching, there was something in the way the taught the material. Often times, you could hear in his voice how ridiculous he thought the words coming out of his mouth were. Like it was just one big joke for him. Like teaching was more of a hobby for his amusement than a career.
“This might just be a phase,” he finally says. “Maybe you’ll fall for your other professors next.”