11 | Sin At Your Doorstep
I didn’t go.
Yeah, you all heard me right.
Like the fucking coward I was, I didn’t go.
Sometimes I wonder if something is wrong with me, Oh wait! There is!
I know I was fucked up mentally in more ways than one but now I’m starting to doubt if there is anything wrong with my sexuality too.
I mean I can bet my life on the fact that any girl would literally kill to get a fine specimen of a man like Blaze for themselves. Yet here I was, even after having several heated encounters with him, I still refused to give myself to him completely.
I really did not understand my initial reaction to him. I don’t know why I cared so much about us working out like it’s going to go on for the long run. I knew very well that once this event was over, he would forget me and move on to his next ‘conquest’.
Heck, he might as well be with someone else right now for all I know.
For some strange reason, the thought of him being with someone else infuriated me greatly. I didn’t even want to dwell on all these strange feelings. I mean I met the man just a couple of days back and here I was, getting mad at him being with someone else.
What surprised me most was the fact that how I felt these emotions. After what happened with Nate, I thought I was incapable of feeling anything at all and now suddenly a handsome dashing man enters my life and sweeps me in his passion like a storm.
Shit, that sounded too sappy.
I was never insecure when it came to men, at least not in the last nine years. I knew that men desired me. I knew I was hot enough to make men swoon at my sight.
I know I’m getting cocky there!
But after my failed attempt at making Nate like me, I gave up trying to disguise myself as plain-Jane like Jane looked and started revealing my true self. I stopped straightening my natural beach curls and embraced my true self. I loved being bold and trying something new all the time. At one point in my life, I realized, I was a fucking fool for thinking that Nate never liked me because I was ugly like Emily used to say, he just never liked me because his taste in women sucked big time, and seeing his eyes pool with adulterated desire was enough for me to realize exactly how much hot I was. As narcissistic as it sounded, over the years I learned to love myself and always put myself on top and never let anyone belittle me.
Not again at least.
But whenever I was in Blaze’s presence, it angered me greatly whenever some women eyed him hungrily. Wait let me correct that. Whenever every woman eyed him up and down, hungrily as if he was the last man left on earth.
I know ladies. He’s just that hot, we just can’t!
Honestly, the best part of the evening was watching Emily’s horrified expression when Blaze flat out ignored her and dragged me away.
But my joy and all my giddiness were diminished as soon as Nate entered the hallway accompanying a gorgeous red-head and my body started shaking with rage at the sight of them.
I guess some pain just always stay there, no matter how much you push them away, they always stay with you.
I unclasp my emerald stud pendant from my neck and stare at myself wistfully in the mirror. I left the party as soon as I saw Nate and came directly to my bedroom. I told Ava that I was feeling ill and left immediately. The last thing I needed was Ava hovering over me. As much as I loved her, I did not want to rant about my problems when she’s already struggling to put her life in place after John’s infidelity. I didn’t bother ringing the maid to bring something for me to eat because I was already full with all the seasoned chicken finger foods I gobbled after Blaze left me with his illicit proposal to visit me in his study which I, like the fucktard I am, I declined.
I suddenly start regretting my decision as an image of Blaze’s head between my breasts the other night flashes in my head.
I could’ve easily gone to him and do the deed but I couldn’t. I don’t know what was stopping me.
‘Maybe this is all too soon’ I wonder.
Oh for fuck’s sake Phoebe! Like you’re ever gonna have a future with him!
DREAM ON! Ha!
I shake my head to get rid of my thoughts and trace the circular outline of the solitary emerald gem of the pendant which glistened underneath the chandelier lights when a loud urgent knock resonated through my room.
Huffing at the late timing of whoever’s here; I drag myself out of the chaise lounge in front of the mirror and lazily head towards the door.
Dragging the doorknob to open the door, my mouth drops agape as my eyes lock with deep blue orbs gazing at me impassively.
It took me about two minutes to compose myself. I took the first minute to register the fact that he was indeed leaning on my bedroom’s doorframe as he owned it, which he actually did. And I took the second minute to contemplate Blaze’s expression and it scared me. Out of all the times I saw him, he always had a cold stern expression on his face or he was either smirking at me. But nothing was there in his face.
It was almost like staring at a rock. Only this rock looked chiseled to perfection as if Michelangelo himself carved him.
His face and eyes were devoid of emotions and it sent chills down my spine.
I finally managed to find my voice and asked him.
“Blaze, what are you doing here?” I gulped the invisible lump down my throat.
He chuckled humorously, shaking his head, and brushed past me and entered my room. I was frozen with shock at his attitude and willed myself to look at him after closing the door.
I did not know what to feel at that moment. I was scared and also excited at the same time.
His arms were folded near his chest and his shirtsleeves were rolled, revealing his bulging triceps. The sight made me drool and heated my core with hunger.
My hunger for him.
I clear my dirty thoughts and find him looking at me with that same hard emotionless look on his face.
I twist my finger nervously and open my mouth to speak but he cuts me off demanding “Why didn’t you come as I told you to?”
Wow, this man really loved to cut people’s speeches off!
I rack my brain for answers and suddenly become angry at him commanding me. Truth be told, I really did not mind him ordering me around, it actually seemed hot but that small feminist part of me was mad with anger. In the end, my feminist-self won.
“Who the hell are you to order me around? I did not co-” He cuts me off again and says chuckling “Jeez, do you need a bed to make-out with me? Cause it did not seem like that over the last couple of days”
His harsh words wash over me like a bucket of freezing water. My throat tightens with humiliation and anger bubbles inside me.
Of course, he sees you nothing other than some cheap whore!
His words really did make me feel like some cheap whore who obeyed all his words and was good at nothing.
Seeing my torn expression, his smirk gets wiped off his face and takes a step forward and I quickly step back to get some space.
Seeing my action, he drags a hand through his hair in sheer frustration and tries to get words out.
“Bloody hell, I didn’t mean it like that. Jesus Christ, Phoebe I-I’m-” he tries to speak but this time, I cut him and whisper calmly whilst keeping my gaze on the floor “Get out”.
When I look up and see him still rooted to his spot, anger hits me with full force and I yell “Get the fuck out you prick!”
His expression hardens at my insult and he comes charging towards me and slams me against the wall with both of my hands in his firm grip.
He raises both of my hands with his left hand and uses the other one to tilt my face towards his and seizes my mouth in a feverish kiss and immediately my mind blanks and the only thing I can focus on is his skilled tongue exploring the contours of my mouth with expertise.
The feeling of not using my arms and being completely under his control drove me towards some invisible precipice that only happened to exist in my head.
So much for showing resistance, Phoebe!
After a while, he lets go of my arms and lifts me swiftly. I jolt with surprise at the sudden movement and clutch onto his shoulder as my knees feel weak from the explosive kiss. It was like wreaking havoc in my system. If it wasn’t for Blaze holding me up, I would’ve probably ended up at his feet.
It was that good.
However, my thoughts vanish once again as I feel his lips brush against the nape of my neck in a kiss that drove me wild as his tongue flicked against my flesh.
He sets me down on my bed gently and looks at me as if he’s seeing me for the first time. He drops his forehead on mine and closes his eyes to take a deep breath. Once he opens them again, I’m beyond mesmerized by the color of his eyes.
They were such a unique shade of blue, not too deep, but not too blue either. As the moonlight shined over us, I notice a faint ring of indigo near his pupil which widens as I keep staring at him in awe. I could smell his scent, which was something like expensive aftershave mixed with a fresh clean scent. If that even makes sense. I also notice a faint smell of alcohol on his breath.
Holy shit! Is he drunk?!
Before I can think any further, his lips drop to the base of my neck, and sucks gently at the skin, nipping occasionally. I moan with pleasure as I feel my arousal peaking with each swipe of his tongue at my neck.
“Damn it! What the hell are you doing to me, Phoebe Carter?” He groans in frustration and I whimper as the vibration of his voice travels from my neck all the way down to my drenched core.
“I don’t know! What the hell are you even doing to me Blaze?” I manage to rasp out and he says nothing.
Huh, I knew damn well what the fuck he was doing to me but I was a huge coward to face the truth.
One of his hands reaches the hem of my dress and he teasingly pulls it up. I lift my body off the bed to get rid of the dress and watch Blaze eyeing my body hungrily with lust.
I was wearing a black lacy push-up bra matched with a black lacy thong that left a little to the imagination.
He groaned and reached behind me to un-clasp my bra. Once it was off, his hot wet mouth feasted on my breasts and leisurely moved downwards whilst dropping feather-light kisses.
I keep writhing on the bed, clasping the bed sheets tightly underneath my fingers as waves after waves of pleasure wash through me.
Finally, after all the teasing, he reaches my south region that was literally begging for his attention. I look at the dimmed chandelier hanging on the ceiling and my brows pull into a frown thinking how the hell are the lights so dimmed all of a sudden, but my thoughts scatter as I feel Blaze using his teeth to drag my thong from my leg.
I would be damned if I didn’t admit that was hot as hell!
His eyes flash towards mine and he offers me a crooked smile as he notices my messy self to which I only had him to blame. He looks down at my naked self and suddenly I become unconscious as he keeps on staring hard. Before I can cover myself from his gaze, he focuses his attention on my sex, which was thankfully waxed practically glistening with need at his expense. He swipes his tongue on his upper teeth sub-consciously.
Suddenly, he kneels on the floor near the edge of the bed, and grabs both my ankles, pulls me towards him in one swift movement, and spreads my legs as far as they can go. His blue eyes gaze at me with carnal fascination as I lean back on my hands, knowing full well what he’s about to do and mirror his expression.
His head dips down and latches his mouth on my core making me flop down on the bed.
OH MY GOD!
I bite my hand to prevent myself from screaming and waking everyone in the castle as his warm tongue drives straight into my wetness. I feel my inner walls pressing down on his tongue and he keeps on licking me with expertise.
His mouth felt THAT good….
I almost screeched like a banshee when one of his hands went upward and rolled my nipples with his long fingers.
“Oh fuck! Don’t you dare stop!” I cry out.
His tongue brushed every corner and circled my clit. I felt that familiar intense grip on my stomach which only Blaze was capable of bringing out in me and my hands gripped his hair tightly.
“Fucking damnation! You taste so fucking good Tesoro” He exclaims.
He let out a groan of pleasure and its vibration spread through my body, sending Goosebumps all the way in.
I felt like screaming for hours.
And I did.
Hours passed away and I came again and again all over his face and it still didn’t stop him as he kept on eating me out like I was his last meal on Earth. I finally gained some strength and lifted myself on my elbows and pulled his face to my mouth in a kiss. I tasted myself on his tongue and he lets out a small moan.
After a while, when we both pulled away from each other to get air, he rested his forehead on top of mine and pecked on my lips before pulling away.
A/N - Is it hot in here or is it me?
Hope you all enjoyed this chapter and would love to hear all of yours thought on it!