I noticed only when I entered the apartment, how cold it was outside and how my hands and face were frozen. I immediately took off my coat, put it on a hanger, and went to the kitchen. I felt the need for a hot fruit tea to keep me warm. It was not until I put the kettle on the fire that I noticed the fireplace turned on, and the door to John's office open. Stepping resolutely towards him, I decided it was time to face him. I wanted to find out if he is happy that he would become a father, or he would simply continue his jealousy, reflecting on the child as well. I had read in a study that most men who have such impulses end up being jealous of their children, because the mother spends more time with the babies than with the fathers. This would have been an absurd reason to invoke, but I had to bring it into the discussion as a starting point to find out other details that did not give me peace.
However, he is not in his chair, nor in the room. He had left the light on and the door open.
A voice could be heard from upstairs. I leaned back, looking at him. It was a sight that a tsunami could have stopped. The towel was wrapped around his waist, his hair freshly washed, and still wet, strands fell over his broad forehead, pierced only by expression. His hairy chest was soothing, so strong that just looking at it, I could feel the texture. God, how nice it was to watch him! I hurried up the stairs, without saying a word, and hugged him as hard as I could, with all the strength I had at the time. His arms clung to me immediately, like a cage catching prey as soon as it touches the bait.
“Honey, forgive me for last night! I was a beast and I still am. I promise it will never happen again, now that I know that you will give me a son or a daughter. Now, when you made me the happiest man in the whole universe, damn it!“
His smile would have reached his ears, if he could. Despite his teary eyes, his victorious laugh echoed throughout the house.
“John, I think we should talk anyway.” I pushed my hands into his chest and freed myself from his grip. I wanted to get rid of those cold clothes as soon as possible and slip into my warm, fluffy robe. He had followed me into the bedroom, but in silence.
“ Do you love me?” I had only managed to take off my sweater when my first question came to mind.
“Kate, what's that question?
“I just want to know!”
“All the saints, I love you! I guess you have no idea how much I love you, since you have doubts about my feelings for you. I asked you to be my wife, you're carrying my baby. What happens?” His face panicked looking for answers.
“I just wanted to know! And I also want to know if you will love this child, because from now on, I tell you honestly, I will not accept any kind of jealousy crisis, or to shout like you did last night. Whether it will be justified or not.” I turned my gaze to him as I tied the cord to my robe. “Besides, no man flirts with a pregnant woman. That is well know!”
He sat down on the bed, sighing deeply. His face was twisted with pain and affected by what I had just told him.
“I don't know how you thought that way, but one thing is certain for me, you will be my family, the family I chose because I love her. One thing I want you to know, I will never leave you.”
Then he looked up sadly at me. I was standing, close to the dressing room. I wanted to keep my distance, until I clear things out about our relationship.
”Because I love you, I love every particle in your body. That includes my baby. I have always wanted children, but now it's time to have them.”
“You never told me that! Probably if I knew.”
“No, Kate!” he shook his head. “If you had known, you would probably have been scared, you would have refused me, you would have accused me of forcing you to have children, just as you accuse me of jealousy. And what is so bad about that? What is it, tell me?”
“Would you rather be milk and honey, never tell you what bothers me? To accept everything? Wouldn't you have questioned me, not seeing any reaction from me, especially when that guy Jess put his paws on you?”
“Jake!” I corrected it instantly, then realized that it was better if I was silent.
Ignoring it, he got up from the bed, placing his towel better around his waist, which revealed through the curves of the material that hides underneath.
“Kate, I'm older than you, we both know that! I would not have asked you to give up your life and what you should have done three years ago, just to give me a baby. I preferred to enjoy you, and to endure until the moment comes. And here it comes. Now, we end the discussions and let me touch my child.”
His footsteps flew up to me, and his warm, strong palm rested on my belly, covering him completely. His face had transformed from the state of agony in which he had been a few minds behind, to a state of ecstasy, supreme joy. He had the face of a happy child who was offered his favorite toy.
“No one and nothing will change my feelings for you. I love you and I will always love you! And believe me, a love does not pass easily, at least not like the one I carry for you, baby.” I whispered to him.
“Are you sure, Kate?”
I nodded and we were both talking between kisses. Wet, sweet, hungry.
“Very, I thought you already knew that!”
“We all need confirmations, from time to time.” He concluded.
Her lips continued their way to her neck, clearing their way to her breasts. With one finger he untied the robe cord, proud and hungry. The sparks in his eyes spread emotion in my womb, gathering with pleasure and desire.
“Honey, do you think I am going to hurt you?”
“Only if you intend it.” And I pulled his hand and walked to the bed, not before helping him free himself from the towel that had fallen at his feet.
We make love, slow, sweet, and tender love. I caressed every inch of his body with my fingertips. We did not rush anything, and when he did not kiss me, he was staring into my eyes, while he entered each time, and I was wet and ready for him. He was the perfect fit,
and I always received it eagerly, trying to adjust
“Kate?” his thick, masculine voice whispered my name in my ear. “What are you thinking about?”
“I was thinking about our wedding. We have not set an exact date yet.”
“Ih-hm! It could be tomorrow, in a week, a month. Whenever you want, baby!”
We were nestled in our bed in the bedroom, under soft and warm bedding. We often liked to spend our evenings sitting in bed and talking about minor things, or in the living room, where I worked on my laptop, and he read the financial newspapers, or sometimes I prepared dinner, which I often could not eat at all, keeping in remaining food storage boxes.
“John, it's not funny!” I nudged him lightly with my elbow in my abdomen and a loud laugh started him. Short but strong, and every time I heard him laugh, my whole body vibrated with pleasure, with love. I loved his whole being, with flaws and qualities. I adore every particle in his body and every word of love he articulates.
“My love, I know you want a small wedding. It would not be difficult to gather the family for a weekend and celebrate.”
“Sounds great so far. But there are still details to be solved, it is not that easy. For example, the church, the dress and the flowers, your costume.” I turned my head to him, feeling his warm breath. He wrapped my cheek in his palm, striking his brown eyes, which now seemed darker because of the dim light in the room. I want to believe that we will do this only once, and I want it to be perfect.
“It doesn't matter to me if you come in pajamas, Kate! You know why?”
Astonished by his opinion, I raised an eyebrow, questioning.
“Because everything is perfect already. I chose the perfect bride, the rest are details, just like you said before!”
I sat up, pulling the sheet over my chest.
“Oh, honey! I love you so much, but no matter how much I love you, I still cannot fulfill your wish. The world will keep an eye on us, yet your company is famous in the city. We will not escape so easily with this event. I may be in love in New York, but I am in love with John North and that requires a flawless wedding outfit.”
Laughing again, he stood up, wrapping his arm around my shoulders.
“Okay, Kate! I think I can understand how this is, and you will have absolutely everything you want. And that is just that I trust your tastes” He smiled at me and pulled me closer to him, placing my head on his shoulder.
Not giving importance to his joke, I told him with a sigh that I had already started the search and as I started so I finished. I told him how I had been looking for hours, for a few days, for a wedding dress, but they were all either too loaded or too expensive.
“Kate, money is not a problem. I know that many times you refused me, when I wanted to give you a free hand to buy everything you want, but this time, I will insist. And I will not give up.”
Shaking my head in agreement that I did not agree, I told him that I would resume my search, and I would not give up until I found one that I liked and could afford from my money earned as a secretary. They were not few, considering that North Company was one of the most profitable companies on the market, according to Forbes magazine.
“But, taking a break, I remember you telling me that when you were a child you liked to draw and from what I saw, you have talent.”
“ So, what does this have to do with us?” I asked him puzzled.
“Why don't you do that now?” he shrugged and raised his eyebrows, as if putting an end to "I". "You mean to draw my wedding dress?" For a moment, I looked at his idea with skepticism, but as the seconds passed, it seemed like a brilliant idea.
“Yes!” he continues enthusiastically. “ Then, after you finish the sketch, we will hire a professional tailor to give it life.”
“It seems like a good idea. I could try, but if I do not succeed, I'll go back to the basics.”
“Ay, Captain!” making a sign with his palm to his forehead, as sailors do.
“ Kate, until next time, I have something for you to do now!” And without thinking too much, he slipped my hand under the sheet and carried it to the hottest spot in his body.