The sun's rays woke me up, I did not even remember where I was, but as soon as I realized that I fell asleep in Jake's arms, it was as if everything was back to normal. We were both covered with a blanket. It seems that Rebecca made sure we were not cold. And sure, did felt warm near him.
It was March anyway, and spring had not yet taken its toll on New York, and it was still cold.
As soon as he felt me move, Jake woke up too. He smiled at me as if he were the happiest man in the world
“Morning! Excuse me for keeping you here, but it was so nice to watch you. I think I stayed like that for an hour, until I fell asleep too.”
I just smiled back at him, starring into his green eyes.
Remembering how he did that when we first got together.
“I don't want to let you go, Kate!! Never!”
His fingers walked over my cheeks, caressing them, and making his way to her hair, playing with it.
“Jake, listen! I do not want to… I do not know how to tell you. I am not ready now. I want to take it slow. I am a mess right now! And I do not want to make any bad decision, something I will regret. I need more time, and I will appreciate if you can give me that”.
“Kate, believe me! I understand you prefect! I am waiting for you, Take your time! But I want to be around you, until then. Like a friend! It this okay with you?”
“Do you think you can handle it?” I asked him.
Running his fingers down my neck, he reaches to my necklace and saw the ring.
“I think it suits you well. Like it supposed to yours!”
“Thank you for the ring, I only got to read you letter today, and I found the ring! I don’t feel like wearing it on my finger.” I said to him.
“I wasn’t for your finger. If I wanted to give you one to wear it properly, I would be the one to put it there. Not sending it in an envelope.”
I already had a lot of scenarios in my head with mood swings, my moments of panic, states of depression that I may have. Or thoughts in which he will not change, and everything will be beautiful only at the beginning, and then he will continue with the same habits of his as before. I know this will come to not a happy ending, I have been there twice, once with him, and second with John.
“Kate, I've changed! I thought you can see it by now! I went to the hospital, wanting to see you. But Rebecca said was better not to, so I stayed there in the hallway. Believe me, if I did not want you, would I still be here? Did I want another life with you? I endured to see you even with that miserable man who does not even know what I would do to him if I saw him.”
“Please, don't remind me of him!! Let us get inside, it is cold here!”
I wanted to avoid this type of conversion right now, but I knew that if I should keep him as friends we will have to mention the unfortunate event sooner or later.
I entered the kitchen door, where Rebeca and Mike were enjoying their coffee before leaving for work.
“Good morning! How are you feeling?” Rebecca asked very cheerfully, and Mike chuckled beside her.
“It’s damn cold outside!” Jake replied, his voice trembling with cold.
“But it looks like you kept each other warm!” Mike felt the need to complete, grinning at both of us.
“Yes! Thanks for the blanket, by the way!”
“I couldn’t let you, guys, freeze and it was too late to wake you up, Kate!! I would have even taken you inside, but you were too heavy. I must go to work, Becca!”
Mike dropped his cup of coffee, kissed Rebecca, and pulled Jake after him.
“Come on! You will change at the office!”
Jake came back to me and whispered in my ear that he would call me later, and all I could tell him was a simple ok.
“So! You two…huh?” Rebecca mustache, immediately after the two walked out the door.
“I do not want to hear it! It is nothing. I explained that I needed time and he understood ... or so I hoped.” I told her with a smile and glad that at last I managed to feel something other than hatred, sadness and despair.
“But how was the reunion with him? Tell me everything! I am curious.”
Rebecca was much more enthusiastic about me; she was waiting for me to tell her just a little child waiting for the Christmas present.
“I can only say that I felt safe. It was a pleasant feeling. But I do not know whether to drag him into the disaster I am in now.”
“Hey, how can you say that?” Rebecca revolts.
“Well, to start with. I don't have a job, obviously I can't go back there.”
I said to hear, while pouring my coffee and sat down next to Rebecca. I had no idea how my life could it rotates 180 degrees.
“Don’t even mention that I don’t have an apartment. I will need a psychologist. By the way, are you allowed to drink coffee, doesn't it hurt the baby?”
“I went to the doctor, he allows it. But do not change the subject here, so believe me, with Jake's help you will be able to get over all this well. He sat next to you in the first days at the hospital. He made sure no one walked through the door. Maybe I should not tell you this, but he really got into a fight with John, John insisted on seeing you, I do not even know how he had these guts anymore, and this thing irritated Jake. Believe me, this man loves you, Katherine!!”
I was amazed at how John came to the hospital, how he could be so shamelessly, but also surprised to find out that Jake was with me, while I was unconscious, and then when I recovered, he stopped coming. I probably should not have kicked him out or maybe he did not want to know he was with me.
“By the way, here's your phone! You have a ton of messages, mostly from John. I must run. Bye, bye! She left the phone on the kitchen table, picked up his purse, and went out the door.
“Thank you! I will see you at dinner!” i managed to say to her before she closed the door.