After I got home, I placed the box on the kitchen counter and stared at it for a while before I grabbed the card off the top and opened it.
I know I left pretty hastily a few weeks ago and you became angry with me but I wanted to make sure you began your career with a great start.
I sat the card next to the box then unlatched the hook letting the top open to reveal the most beautiful set of knives I had ever seen. The handles were black metal and the blades were stainless steel. The set included a carving knife, a paring knife, a chef's knife, a meat clever, a bread knife and a sharpener and underneath them was a leather carrying bag for easy transport.
I examined them closely and realized how valuable these knives truly were, especially the hefty price tag. There was no way I could accept these but I also knew that giving them back would be rude. I placed each knife in it's place in the bag and rolled it up, securing it with the strap and set them on the table next to the box.
Why would he buy this for me when all I did was erase him from my life forever without an explanation? I owed him one and first thing tomorrow morning I would find out from James how to get in touch with him.
After I had taken a nice soak in the tub, I laid in bed and grabbed my laptop for more research. I wanted to be ready for anything that could happen Tuesday night, to be able to at least show some knowledge of this lifestyle, and I needed to be able to prove that I could play the part.
The next morning I woke up with a dead computer on my lap. I must have fallen asleep again while I was searching the web. I stretched my sore neck and put my laptop on charge then shot a text to James for Ethan's number.
Fifteen minutes later my phone pinged with a message and all I could do was stare at the screen. I didn't know how to proceed next but all I could do was try and if he didn't respond then I knew for sure whatever chance I ever had with him was gone.
Me: Hi Ethan, this is Britt. I wanted to thank you for the knives but you really didn't need to do that, I don't deserve them and I don't deserve your forgiveness but I wanted to apologize for the way I handled things.
I put my phone down and waited for a reply but after an hour of nothing I decided to get up and make myself something to eat. I had just finished when Tara came walking through the door with her arms full of bags.
"Well don't just stand there, help me with all this shit." She said as she waddled into the house.
I grabbed a bunch of the bags from her and walked over to the couch where I threw them down.
"What did you do Tara?"
"I went on a little shopping spree for you!"
"WHAT? WHY?" I said as I stared at the sea of very expensive named bags lining the living room floor.
"Oh get off it, you deserve it, you're a woman now."
My heart fell to my toes and I felt sick to my stomach that she would do all this for me when all I did was lie to her about how my birthday night went.
"Tara, no, you have to bring this all back, I don't deserve any of this stuff. Please return it."
"Oh shut it. I'm not bringing any of it back and you know it."
"Tara, please, I don't..."
"Stop talking Britt. You do deserve all of this, not only did you ace your final and will be graduating soon but you also scored a bomb ass job at one of the best restaurants in the city and that deserves to be celebrated. Now, let's go hang all this up."
I knew I wouldn't win this argument even if I ended up telling her the truth but having all these nice things hanging in my closet taunting me would eventually take its toll on me and I knew the longer I kept these secrets the worse it would be when she did find out.
After she forced me to try on a few things and then helped me put everything away, I checked my phone on the off chance that Ethan possibly texted me back, but still nothing. I sighed and dropped it back onto my bed and went to meet Tara in the living room for a movie.
"Christian Grey has got to be the worst depiction of a dom I have ever seen." She said as she tossed the remote down on the couch and stomped off into the kitchen to refill our popcorn.
"How would you know?"
"Because they just don't fall in love with their subs, they fuck them and that's it, that's the point of their relationship."
Her words hit me like a ton of bricks and I started to rethink the decision that I had made a few days ago. I mean it wasn't expecting to fall head over heels for the man who would be pleasuring himself by sexually torturing me but a girl could hope for a happy ending, right?
"Tara, have you ever..." I said gesturing towards the TV at the scene playing before us.
"What? Let a man do those things to me? Absofuckinglutely I have. I mean I haven't done everything like get chained to a wall or suspended in mid air by ropes but hard, rough sex, whips and handcuffing is pretty exciting."
I could feel my cheeks burning red as she continued talking about the things she did with this guy she met last summer. She said she never got too deep into it but she didn't mind the small affair they shared while he was taking a break as she called it. She explained some of the rules she had to follow, basic things like what she had to address him as, remembering how he liked her to be when he came over, and even his crazy ridiculous jealous side.
I sat there and soaked up every word she said, hoping it would give me a better picture of what to expect but some of the things she told me made my inner defiant self angry. I knew control was one of the main aspects of this lifestyle but how much would I be able to give up?
The day flew by as we sat there and watched all three movies of the series making me completely forget that Ethan still hadn't text me back, well I guess I got my answer. Tara had nodded off during the last movie while I sat there and continued watching it by myself. I was just about to turn the TV off when I heard a knock at the front door. Tara stirred a bit but never opened her eyes so I got off the couch and crept to the door.
I unlocked it and opened the door coming eye to eye to a very weary looking Ethan.
"Do you want to tell me why you're ignoring my texts, again?"
I looked at him in confusion then ran into my room to check my phone where I found it dead on top of my comforter. Shit! I plugged it in and turned to see him standing in my doorway, leaning against the frame with his arms folded over his chest. My mouth went dry just looking at him.
"I'm sorry Ethan, I must have forgotten to plug it in and the battery died and I didn't get any of your messages. I'm so so sorry." I blabbered on for a few seconds as he stood there furrowing his brows.
I cleared my throat and said "The knives are really beautiful but you didn't have to get me anything, especially something so expensive."
"You deserved them."
"I'm sorry for ignoring you Ethan. I just wasn't sure what you wanted after the kiss and then the whole me being half naked in my room thing making you run off. I just..."
"Brittany, I'm sorry for leaving like I did but I'm not the flowers and chocolates kind of guy. I don't do the sweet thing and my life is too complicated to explain. I didn't mean to make you think that I wasn't attracted to you because I am but you are innocent, mouthy and too impulsive and I am not the right guy for you." He walked back towards the door then turned and said "You're welcome for the knives."
I heard the front door close while I stood there alone, frozen to the spot on my bedroom floor. After the week I had, I finally made up my mind. If he thought he knew what I wanted then I would just have to show him he was wrong. He might think I was just some young girl who talks back and made sporadic decisions but I was going to prove to him that I could be just as poised and disciplined as the girls he dated.
When my phone finally came on, I opened my messages to see that I had 4 unread ones, all from Ethan. My heart nearly leaped out my chest when I read the last one.
Ethan: I'm coming over if you don't answer me back.
Him showing up made me realize that he must have been fighting an internal battle with himself because his words and his actions showed two different things. He liked me, that much he admitted, but he was trying to push me away for some reason and I wasn't sure I was ready to know the reason.
Sorry for the short update but the next coming chapters will be filled with a lot of training and I needed Ethan to make another appearance before Britt ventured into the world of BDSM.
Will she be able to break him and make him a different man?
Do you think the will ever be able to keep her mouth