I didn't know how to respond and at the moment all I wanted to do was throw my phone across the room. I ignored his text and placed it back on the nightstand. I should have known nothing good would have come from letting him bring me home. I mean he's done this before so why did I think this time would be any different?
After huffing and puffing for an hour I finally fell asleep but my dreams weren't any better. My mind kept replaying our intimate escapade over and over on constant repeat as if etching it into my brain to be constant reminder that I was never going to be good enough for him, that no matter how hard I tried, he wouldn't give me what I needed.
The next morning, I still had no idea what I would say to Ethan or what he wanted to say to me but I responded to his text anyway.
Me: Yes, I think we should talk too.
Ethan: I'll pick you up for lunch at 12.
Me: Tell me where and I'll just meet you.
Ethan: I would rather pick you up.
Me: You don't have to do that Ethan, I can do things for myself. Besides I wouldn't want to inconvenience you more than I already have.
Ethan: I'm picking you up!
Ugh, whatever. His last statement didn't even deserve a response so I tossed my phone on the floor and turned over to get a few more hours of sleep.
I must have slept longer that I planned to because the loud banging on the front door made me jump up and roll right off the bed. I landed on the ground hard, yelping from the pain and reached for my phone when I saw the time, 12:15pm along with 15 messages and 10 missed calls all from Ethan.
"Shit!" I said to myself and yelled from my room "I'm coming, just a second."
I made it to the door and yanked it open to see a very pissed off Ethan leaning against the door frame looking sexy as hell. Everything I wanted to say last night went out the window when he brushed past me while slamming the door closed then pushing me against it.
His eyes were full of worry and his lips were pressed together in a tight line then he said “Do you always have trouble following directions? Or is it something you just like doing to me?”
“Honestly, it tickles me!”
His eyes dilated and he said “I told you once before about your mouth now are you going to go change or do I have to do it for you?”
My mouth went dry and my panties become wet from his words. Everything about what he said should have made me kick him out but I found it extremely exciting and I kind of wanted to defy him but I knew I wouldn't be able to handle any kind of punishment, at least not until Mistress taught me.
I rushed past him and threw on a cream sweater dress and a pair of knee-high boots then brushed my hair and teeth before returning to the living room where he was talking on the phone. I grabbed my purse and waited for him to open the door then walked out to his car.
He was still talking when we pulled up to a cute little bistro and were escorted inside to the back and seated at a quant table for two. The hostess handed us some menus and I thanked him while Ethan was engrossed in the conversation he was having with one of his business partners.
Staring at the menu before me, I noticed how original it was. Of course there were your classic lunch items but with a very unique twist. My eyes began to glaze over as I imagined touring Paris and Italy to enhance my culinary talents with worldly creativity just like this restaurant had. I had become so mesmerized with the menu and suddenly couldn't decide between the Tuscan BLT or the Bouillabaisse with fresh Maine lobster.
The waitress came to the table and placed a French baguette with herbed butter in the center along with two glasses of water. I looked up and noticed Ethan staring at me with a small smirk as the waitress asked for our order. I blushed and looked down picking the BLT then handed her my menu as Ethan order a petite filet topped with lump crabmeat.
He never took his eyes off of me as he ordered then gave his menu to the woman. I was beginning to feel uncomfortable when I finally asked "Why are you staring at me like that?"
"Just wondering if I will ever look at something in such amazement as you were just looking at that menu."
I placed my hands in my lap and looked down at them trying to avoid eye contact with him, afraid that he would see how much lust and pain were flashing in them. I didn't want to feel this way around him but I couldn't help it. He just did things to me that no one has ever been able to do. Not even, Colin.
"For the life of me I can't understand why sometimes you are so quick with that tongue but when you receive a compliment you clam up."
I looked up at him wanting to give him some sassy response but the words escaped me when I saw his sexy smile staring back at me.
Just as I was about to speak the waitress returned with our meals and we silently dug in. I picked at my food as he cut his steak and groaned as it was clearly not cooked to his perfection. Go figure.
I looked away and said "You wanted to talk so let's talk."
He placed his knife and fork down on the plate and said "Straight to business I see." He sighed then leaned back in his chair and said "Look about last night..."
"I know it was a mistake and it never should have happened." I said cutting him off before he had the chance to hurt me again.
"Brittany it's not..."
"It's ok Ethan, I know I am not the girl for you but you never even gave me a chance and that's what hurts the most." Before I could let him respond I stood up and said "Thank you for lunch but I have to go." I walked as fast as I could out the restaurant and around the corner before he could catch up to me and force me into his car to bring me home.
Once I realized he wasn't following me I made the chilly walk home, wishing I would have grabbed a scarf and mittens before I left my house. I finally made it there and noticed Tara's car along with Kyle's truck in the driveway and instead of going in, I continued walking towards the coffee shop just around the block.
There was a small line at the counter but I didn't mind waiting since I was beginning to warm up from the heater. I placed my order and found a chair next to the small fireplace in the back and settled in with a book I had been wanting to read. After my coffee was brought to me, I sat it on the table next to me and dove into the novel.
It was about a homeless teen who volunteered at soup kitchens and homeless shelters, cooking and serving other sad and desolate people of her state as she was going through her own struggles. She managed to pay her way through culinary school by taking small jobs around her city and also donated half of her paycheck to the children's programs she used to belong to as she grew up on the streets.
Two coffees in and 500 pages later, I was finally finished and never noticed the tears rolling down my cheeks until I felt his hand wipe them away. I looked up to see Ethan squatting down before me while I sat in the chair clinging to the book for dear life. I dropped it and threw myself into his arms and said "I'm sorry."
He rubbed my back and said "I'll let it slide, this time."
I pulled back and said "I just didn't want you to turn me down again, I don't think I could have held it together in front of everyone if you had told me that it was a mistake or that we shouldn't have gotten into that situation or that you didn't think you could see me anymore."
He took a deep breath and said "It is true, we did get carried away but I don't regret it. I'll admit it was hasty of us but the truth is, there is just something about you that makes me loose it when I'm around you. I can't hold back and it scares me because I don't want to hurt you."
"I feel the same way. It's like something inside me just wants to do whatever you say without a word and you already know I have no problem saying what I think but this is different somehow and I don't know what it means."
He smirked and said "Then let's take it slow. I want to spend time getting to know you correctly."
My mind was blank as I tried to process what he just said then I thought about what happened and what I should have told him last night and I freaked a little knowing it had to come out eventually. "There is something you need to know about me first, something that I should have told you last night before we got carried away."
"Why don't we get out of here, this sounds like something that doesn't need to be discussed in a coffee shop."
Blushing at the thought of someone overhearing or his reaction when I told him in a room full of strangers enjoying coffee and pastries, I nodded and took his hand as he helped me off the chair.
We walked out to his awaiting car and climbed in. We took off in the opposite direction of my house and I suddenly realized we were headed to his. I didn't know if it was such a good idea because I wasn't sure how he would respond once I told him but I also didn't want to have this conversation at my house with Tara and her man having sex in the room next to us.
Britt needs to stop reacting so prematurely. She's beginning to show how immature she really is. Come on girl, you better get it together before you begin this journey into the erotic sex world.
Poor Ethan was just trying to talk with her and she barged out. SMDH.
WHAT?????? Did Ethan just tell her how he felt and that he wanted to date her, slowly. This is fricking awesome. Now what will he think when she tells him her secret??