JACKSON BLACK

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Panicking

Chapter 12

The first thing Lucy notices is the bed, it wasn’t a dream, they had stormed in and got her, they saved her, then without warning the memories of what happened comes flooding back, she starts screaming, she has no idea how long she was screaming and crying for but when she finally comes to, she is curled up on Jacksons bed with him holding her saying things trying to soothe her, his shirt soaked with her tears “I’m sorry, i didn’t mean to get you wet, Jay” she looks at him, the tears slowing down, he grabs her face between his hands, using his thumbs to wipe the tears off her cheeks “i don’t care about that Lucy, its just a shirt” he stops rubbing her cheeks and looks her in the eyes “my only concern right now is you. Is supporting you in healing, healing your body and healing your mind. You are it for me, so i will spend the rest of my life helping you to heal, if that means you crying into my shirt until its saturated for the rest of our lives, then so be it” she can see so many emotions flowing through his beautiful eyes, but the one that she sees the most is love, and that’s when she decides she has to get herself together, she knows its going to be a long road, but with him by her side she knows she can do it. She snuggles into him, “i love you Jackson, so so much, but, you really need a shower” she says sniffling and giggling at the same time while trying to push him away. Laughing at her he shakes his head and mumbles under his breath but she still manages to hear it “there’s my girl” and he walks away to the bathroom. Once he is gone, Lucy lets out the breath she didn’t realise she had been holding. This is going to be hard, where do you even start to sort through the shit she has been through? Her mind starts racing with thoughts, her breath quickens ‘shit! I’m having a fucking panic attack!!’ she thinks, her mind racing “Jackson?” she says barely above a whisper “Jackson!” she says louder but still not loud enough for him to hear over the running shower. She gets up and stumbles to the bathroom door, slamming it open and falling onto the tiles. Jackson jumps out from under the running water and runs over to her “Lucy? What’s wrong? I need you to talk to me baby” he is holding her up off the floor “having.... a.... panic.... attack” she manages to mutter “Fuck! C’mon Lucy, breathe for me” he says, picking her up and taking her back over to the bed, lying her down and getting in next to her, pulling her up tp his chest and snuggling her in. “that’s it babe, breathe for me, big breath in, hold it, and release, that’s it, great work baby, your doing so well” he speaks to her in a calm tone while rubbing her back, eventually she calms down and before long he notices her even breaths. Slowly he slides out from under her, she stirs but he puts one of his shirts under her arms and face, his smell instantly calming her and settling her back down. He goes over to his closet and chucks on a pair of trackies and leaves a note on his pillow in case Lucy wakes up and sees him gone. Heading down to his study he finds Curtis on the phone behind his desk. He sits down on the couch and pulls his phone out, texting the manager at the club and making sure everything was going ok while he waited for Curtis. “you right man?” Curtis looks at him hanging up the phone, Jackson drags his palms down his face a few times “Fuck man, i don’t even know. She just had a full on panic attack when i left her to go have a shower” he sighs “she couldn’t breathe, i thought i was going to loose her again” he pauses and looks at his best friend, tears in his eyes, clearly hurting alongside her, FOR her. “got any news?” Curtis looks at him and raises an eyebrow “you sure you want to do this now?” Jackson nods “i need the distraction, without it i know ill go check her to much and i don’t want to wake her, she needs the rest” Curtis sits and stares at his mate, he knows his conflicted “how about i get Alisha to go lie with her? That way you can have your distraction but you also know she’s safe and will be updated if something happens?” Jackson sighs, he knows that is a good idea, those girls are closer then sisters, he knows Alisha will look after her, he knows she will keep him updated, he also knows that Lucy will love having Alisha with her, he nods “do it, once i take Alisha up there and check on Lucy 1 last time we will get to work” Curtis pulls his phone out “roger that, buddy” he pulls up Alisha’s digits and hits that green button and puts the call on speaker, a sleepy voice answers “Baby? Are you ok? Is Lucy ok? Oh god please tell me shes ok!” Alisha says, firing off all those questions in the space of 2 seconds and it has Jackson thanking god that Lucy has someone like that in her life “Alisha, she’s ok, i have you on speaker, Jacksons with me” she sighs, obviously relived “Hey Jay, how’s she doing?” “Hey Lee, honestly? I think she’s putting on a brave face, but she’s struggling. We had a chat tonight and she’s seemed ok, told me to go shower” he pauses “but once id left she had a full on panic attack, somehow managed to crawl into the bathroom and collapsed” he stops, trying to reel in his emotions, blows out a big breath “she couldn’t breath Alisha. Its was fucking terrifying. She’s ok now, she’s asleep, she cried for so long. I want to ask you, can you come sit with her please? I don’t want her to wake up alone and we have some work to do” Alisha knows exactly what that means, she wasn’t a fan of the boys ‘other’ business but these assholes kidnapped her best friend, tied her to a chair, did god knows what to her for 4 days, they deserve whatever they have coming to them, she answers with no doubt in her mind “absolutely, go get those fucking pricks for what they did to our girl. Ill be there in 15” And with that she hangs up. Curtis just stares at his phone, disbelief all over his face “well, i wasn’t expecting her to say that!” he says looking Jacksons way, she’s never hidden the fact she doesn’t like what he does, in fact they have had plenty of arguments over it, but she knows that while Jackson is in the game so is he, what she doesn’t know is they have talked a lot lately about a way to eventually get out of it and going legit. A knock at the study doors pulls him from his thoughts. Watching the door slowly push open he sees his Alisha, still in her pjs but with 2 small bags, she walks in and pulls Jackson into her, hugging him. Curtis clears his throat, she glares at him. Okay she’s still pissed he thinks to himself, another throat clearing, Jacksons turn “do you guys have something you need to talk about?” he asks them “nope, this dickhead knows where i stand” she says shooting daggers at Curtis “ah.. ok” he says drawing out the ok “well, ill take you up to her, i just want to look at her once more before i go if that’s ok?” she nods, turns to Curtis, walks up to him and pulls him in tight, he wraps himself around her “just coz I’m pissed at you doesn’t mean i don’t love you, whatever you guys are going to do just come back to me safe, you hear me babe?” still hugging his chest, she looks up at Curtis’ face, chin on his chest. “how did i get so lucky to have you with me?” he says to her bending down and gently kissing her on the lips “i have no fucking clue Curtis, but for some reason i love you, just come back to me, I want to argue with you more” he stares at her lovingly, Jackson looks confused between them, she pulls herself from Curtis giving him one more kiss and walking to Jackson who’s still confused, she shrugs at him “what? The make up sex is great, i mean its fucking amazing normally, but, damn! Your boy over there knows how to make a girl feel things” with that the 3 of them laugh, walking out of the room, Curtis heads outside while Jackson walks her to his room to a still sleeping Lucy “what’s in the bags Lee?” he asks her, intrigued. “Well, some clothes for me and that kind of stuff, but the other one is for her, some clothes, toiletries, and some of her comfort things i know will make her feel better” Yep, he is so happy Lucy has such an amazing friend. He looks her in the eyes “thank you. I cant tell you how much it means to me” he cant find the right words to express his gratitude to her, she smiles at him, she gets it, “Jackson, she’s my sister from a different mister, I love her, i know you know her story, she told me she had told you, we are all we have, its been like that forever, she is the family i chose, just like you and Curtis. Please, Just be careful, ok? You guys need to come back to us. I want to have Curtis’s babies one day and he needs to actually be around to make them” she’s grinning, he pulls her in “i promise Lee, we have never taken unnecessary risks, but since you girls have come into our lives and turned them upside down, we are even more careful. Never doubt that, ok?” he kisses the top of her head and walks towards the side of the bed where Lucy is “I love you baby, ill be back as soon as i can” kissing her on the temple as she lies on her side facing him, still sleeping. “you are my world Lucy” standing up and starting to walk away, turning to look back at her before leaving out the door.

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