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๐“ข๐“ฒ๐”๐“ฝ๐“ฎ๐“ฎ๐“ท ~ ๐“”๐“ถ๐“น๐“ฝ๐”‚

~

y/n = your name

~

*Malfoy*

It was Diggory.

It had to fucking be him.

What did the blithering fucking idiot even do to her?

I stand over her body, watching her with her eyes closed, arm draped over her side. To my right, Pansy; to my left, Hermione.

Hermione bends down beside her, as I whip my head around towards Diggory, staring into his eyes. His eyes were filled with confusion and distress.

I storm up to him, clenching my jaw out of anger. It felt like it was about to dislocate from the strength of my teeth pressed up against each other. I grab onto the collar of his button-up shirt.

"What the fuck did you do to her?"

Silence.

I pull him up to my face, looking him in the eyes. I was hoping my stare intimidated him as I clenched my jaw even harder.

"Draco no- don't" Pansy attempts to pry me off of him but my grip was too tight around his shirt.

I completely ignored Pansy, but couldn't hide the fact everyone was starting to crowd around us. Whispering and chattering was happening as Hermione hovered over Evans' body, shaking her, begging her to wake up.

"What the fuck did you do to her?" I raise my voice.

Diggory scoffs, offended.

"I didn't do shit, now get off of me,"

He pushes me away by my chest as I falter back, almost tripping over her body. Once I catch my balance, I push him back five times harder, making him fall to the ground.

"What the fuck do you mean you didn't do anything? LOOK AT HER,"

He just scoffs.

"Typical Malfoy. Always having to blame his problems and irresponsibility on everyone else. Take some fucking responsibility for-"

This angered me. He was right. But it's not like I have a fucking choice. I mean if anyone was under the pressure I'm constantly under, they would do the same, would they not?

"-your actions. Stop blaming your sappy little fucking life on things you do," he starts to get up, "you caused this to happen. You didn't watch out for how much she drank-"

My scoff breaks his sentence.

Chatter filling in the silence between us. The music fading away in the background as all focus was on us.

I didn't fucking do this.

Did I?

Fuck please no.

Eye darting between me and Diggory. Back and forth. People discussing and arguing about who they believed more.

Of course, most thought Cedric was right. Who wouldn't? I was the fucking asshole. The one who's always caught doing bad shit.

The fucking disappointment.

I'm the fucking problem.

I've never been good enough and now my reputation is fucking ruined.

Even more, than it was already.

"No. I was watching her. She was fine until you had to interfere and-"

"To be fair, she did seem a little- tipsy," Pansy cuts in.

Shut the fuck up Parkison-

I clench my fists, wanting to fucking scream.

I wanted to scream.

Let out my fucking anger.

I'm sick and tired of beating myself up for everything. I'm sick of being pressured by everyone around me. I always use father as a way to scare people off because I think since he scares me so much he should scare others.

I don't have the energy for Parkinson right now. I don't have the energy for any of this shit. I look around to see all eyes on me to see how I'll react. Of course, they all expect me to lash out.

Good. Be fucking scared of me. It's not like I need any of you pathetic prats. I've done just fine without you. Fuck you.

"Pansy-" I huff, "Shut the fuck up,"

This raised some chatter as the music completely died down, McGonagall pushing through the crowd of students, muttering as she did.

Diggory looks at me, eyes full of anger, jaw clenched, fists clenched. I've never seen him this angry. I eye Granger who was now sobbing, looking up.

"Look what you fucking-" Diggory starts to say before I cut him off.

"Diggory I swear to Merlin if you say another-"

"Or what? Are you gonna call your coward of a father to come pick you up? You can't deal with your own problems? You fucking coward,"

Okay, that's it.

Looking around at the swarm of students I can tell they want a reaction out of me. If they want a reaction, they'll get a fucking reaction.

I storm up to Diggory, pulling my wand out of my suit pocket. His face goes pale as my heart is palpitating out of my chest out of anger. Out of disgust; they really think I would do this on purpose? I couldn't hurt Evans even if I wanted to.

I hold the wand up to his chin, pushing it into his skin as he reaches up, away from the wand attempting to avoid it piercing into his skin. I didn't care if he was hurting. I didn't care. He hurt her. He must've who else would it have been?

I hear the slight yelling of Hermione behind me. Calling my name I think. I hear McGonagall yelling something. I couldn't hear. My thoughts drowned out the chatter and murmurs of the nosey students. What do they even care about what's happening?

"Malfoy!"

I hear a loud yell breaking the cloud of thoughts. It was both Hermione and McGonagall. My vision focuses on Cedric who was now almost in tears from fear.

Good.

He was pleading I didn't do anything. So were a few other Hufflepuffs in the crowd. I look back to Hermione who was on her knees beside her. She lay peacefully. She looks beautiful for just having blacked out.

Why does Granger look so worried?

"She's- She's-" she struggles to say between her tears.

"Fucking spit it out Granger," I urge.

"She's not breathing," she lets out one last breath.

It seemed painful to let out. I've felt that before. When your throat tightens so much you feel like you're going to throw up. Your mouth becomes dry with stress and fear. You feel as if you're going to break into a million pieces. But you need to keep it together or people will think you're weak.

I felt it when I watched my father. When I watched my father beat my mum. He beat her for not obeying him. For not doing the simplest thing. If I remember correctly, she didn't prepare dinner in time for him to get home from the Ministry.

For not preparing fucking dinner.

~

๐“•๐“ต๐“ช๐“ผ๐“ฑ๐“ซ๐“ช๐“ฌ๐“ด

"My love please-"

"You filthy little useless piece of fucking trash. What do I even keep you around for? I ask one thing from you. But you're too pathetic to even do that," he scoffed.

I could hear the yelling from my room so I started to slowly inch down the stairs, making sure not to make a noise. I was scared as to what my father would do to me if he caught me eavesdropping. Maybe lock me in the cellar like last time?

"Darling-"

"Don't fucking speak unless spoken to. I tell you that every day. When will you fucking learn?"

I hear more yells as I inch around the corner. The yells like knives being thrown in the air. The words hitting my face even though they were around the corner. I could hear him clear as day. I turn slowly to peek around the corner.

I see her. Mum. Sitting on a barstool in the kitchen, holding her hands to herself. Scared. She was scared; and so was I. I wanted to intervene but I was too scared to face him. The vigorous yelling ringing in my ear was too horrifying to face.

"You fucking slag. I ask you to make dinner for me. That's all I ask. I'm the one who provides for this insult of a family and I come home to nothing on my fucking plate,"

"My love, I was just about to make it. I fell asleep-"

"See? That's the fucking problem. You fell asleep. Why were you tired? For doing absolutely fucking nothing? Twiddling your fucking thumbs all day?"

"Please my love, Draco can hear you-" tears start to pool in her eyes.

She's terrorized.

He scoffs, "you're such a bag-" she cuts him off.

"I'm providing for Draco! Our son needs someone! You're at work all day and I-"

Father slams his cup of firewhiskey on the marble table, causing a loud bang to cut off her words. Her face goes pale out of fear, tears running down her face. She was scared but she was trying. She always tries.

"Don't you dare talk back to me you filthy fucking slut. I don't fucking care about our son but-"

Mum stands, up sliding the chair out from under her, causing a loud screech to emit through the house. She wipes her cheek, attempting to look stronger than what she was feeling inside. I could tell she was falling apart inside.

"I want to be there for him! He needs a parent-"

I watch as father storms up to her, raising his hand, swiping it across her face. As his hand makes contact with her face I hear a piercing scream. I cover my ears, attempting to hold back the tears from running down my face. Her screams were horrifying as he constantly, over and over, hit her until she was on the floor, begging for his mercy.

It was painful to watch. She did nothing but try. But her trying was never good enough, as was mine. I couldn't dare face him. Or I would end up in the cellar again.

Mum's eyes were filled with tears, his were filled with anger. He was ruthless, to say the least. Father was drunk off of firewhiskey; he always was. I felt weak compared to him; I was.

I wipe away a tear from my cheek, as my eyes meet mum's broken ones. Pain pooling in her eyes. She wanted- no. She needed help. But I couldn't help her. I needed to do something, but my heart dropped just as her peering over at me caught my father's attention.

He whips his head around, running his tongue over his teeth and clenching his jaw. His eyes darted back over to mum, who started to get up, trying to pull him towards her, attempting to stop him from walking over to me.

He threw his arm back, knocking her back onto the floor as tears started pouring down her face. My jaw clenched, my throat tightened and my face went pale with fear. I have never been more scared in my life as I watch him grab his cup of firewhiskey and throw it into the wall, shattering the pieces everywhere.

He walks up to me and I gulp a painful gulp. I take that one breath. The painful breath. I felt my throat tighten, mouth dry with stress and fear, and I felt as if I was about to shatter, just like the glass of firewhiskey that shattered against the wall. I might as well be after he found me eavesdropping.

"You little fucking-" he grabs me by the collar, lifting me up to his face, my feet barely touching the ground.

I gasp for air, my mouth still dry. It was excruciating. His eyes were burning through me and I didn't want to breathe out of terror. I didn't know what to expect from him, but I know it would be severely unpleasant.

"What do you think you're doing down here?" he questions, clenching his fist.

I was getting ready to avoid whatever he would throw at me.

"I- I was just-"

"Please darling! Please don't hurt him," mum calls out.

I peer over to her as she looks at me, pain and regret in her eyes and tears streaming down her face. Through the pain, she is able to give me a small smile, mouthing the words, "I love you."

"Shut up, I wanna hear what he has to say for himself,"

"I just wanted- I was- I was just hungry, but I can wait till dinner is ready,"

Hoping he buys my excuse, I turn to run away, back up into my room to get away from the catastrophe. It was horrible. Mum's screams still ringing in my ear.

I feel a strong hand grab onto my wrist, rings digging into my skin. I could've sworn they broke through my skin.

"Where are you going?" He smirks.

His fucking smirk. I wanted to rip it off of his face. He just hurt mum and now he's hurting me. Why is he smirking?

"I- was just gonna wait up in my room," I stutter, not daring to rip my hand from his grasp.

"No, you aren't. It's rude to eavesdrop," he can sense the fear in my eyes. He can see the teardrop running down my face. Mum was still begging him to let me go in the back, but he didn't care, "It's alright, you need to learn one way or another,"

"What?" I sniffle.

He immediately grabs my wrist, pulling me down the hall while I scream in agonizing pain from his rings. They were digging into my skin, blood running down my wrist. Mum tried to run after us, but he just kept pushing her back onto the floor.

"Please father-"

"Don't speak unless spoken to, Draco. I thought you would be smarter than your bampot mother,"

"Don't- Don't call her that! Please!" I try to wriggle out of his grasp, as his grip becomes tighter, rings digging deeper into my skin.

Tears are running down my face as I struggle to keep my feet under me. I was about to fall onto the ground before we reached the cellar. The cellar where I was put whenever he didn't feel like dealing with me. The cellar where I was put to be punished.

He throws me into the cellar, as I fall to the floor, grasping onto my bleeding wrist. I can still hear mum's screams as she tries to stop father from doing this. He wouldn't listen to her.

He never cared about her opinion; never asked. He wanted everyone to obey him, no matter the situation. It was disgusting without a doubt, but this is how I was raised. By an arsehole who didn't know when enough was enough, and a mother who was trapped in a terrible relationship.

~

Now, mum doesn't even flinch when he's angry. She always listens to him, no questions. She's numb and it's terrifying to see. She was the only one I had left.

I quickly rush over to Evans, without hesitation, while I hear yells from students, trying to get me to stay away from her. I don't care who wanted me to leave, I was not leaving her here.

I pick her up and look over to Hermione, who was crying hysterically. I hurry and start to walk quickly to the hospital wing, not looking back. I look down at y/n and she looks empty; lifeless.

I needed to get her there fast so I start to run. Her hair blows in the breeze of the castle as the cold air passes my ears.

I need her to be okay.

Walking up the hospital wing, I see Ms. Pomfrey standing at the back, organizing some tools and potions.

"Oh dear, what happened to her?" She queries, scurrying over to me.

"I don't know. She just fainted at the ball and now she's not breathing. Help her," I plead.

"Of course darling, pass her to me," she grabs Evans out of my hands. I was reluctant to give her away but I know that if anyone could help it was Ms. Pomfrey, "now leave so I can heal her properly,"

There's no way I'm leaving her.

"No, I'm-"

"Mister Malfoy, leave for Merlin's sake,"

I huff, as I back up not wanting to take my eyes off of her. I need her to be okay.

Why do I care so much about this girl?

She's driving me insane.

She's fucking amazing but I don't understand what's so mesmerizing about her.

That didn't matter right now. I need to find Cedric and fucking kill him.

I pull out my wand, ready to strike at him once I get the first glance of his stupid fucking brown hair. I look around, walking back into the great hall which just returned to the loud music and chatter of the wonderful night. Well, not so wonderful anymore. After what happened.

I scan the hall, looking for the brown-haired Hufflepuff boy, unable to find him anywhere.

"Mister Malfoy," I hear a sharp voice behind me, "come with me,"

It was McGonagall.

I sigh, giving in and following her. It's not like I had a choice.

Walking into her classroom, I see him.

Diggory.

He was sitting in a chair in front of her desk, as well as Parkinson. Cedric looked antsy while Pansy looked calm, sitting back with crossed arms.

I sit down in the seat beside Diggory as McGonagall sits in her chair, facing us. She intertwines her fingers in front of her, placing her hands on her desk, eyeing all three of us.

"What happened?" she asks, sharply.

"Ask Diggory," I spat.

"I didn't do shit," he declares.

Fucking liar.

"Why not questions Pansy? She hasn't said anything all night about it,"

I look over to Pansy who is staring blankly at the wall, barely paying attention.

He does have a point.

"Pansy?"

"Miss Parkinson? Would you like to tell us something?"

She glares over at all three of us and just lets out a chuckle.

"You really think I would go through all that just for that foul git?" She scoffs, "she's not worth my bloody time,"

She is not a foul git.

Fuck you, Pansy.

If I could, I would stupefy her arse right now.

"Okay, well we're gonna wait here until one of you confesses something,"

I groan.

I need to see her and make sure she's okay.

After about five minutes, I can't take any more of the silence.

"Someone fucking confess so I can get out of here,"

They both scoff, looking at me.

"Confess what?" Cedric queries.

"For fuck's sake just confess so we can leave," I glare at Diggory.

There was a knock at the door, breaking the tension between all three of us. All of our heads turn to see who it is.

Filch.

"Professor Dumbledore needs to see you to discuss... house points," he stammers.

"Alright, I'm coming, I'm coming. You three," she looks over at us, "behave and stay here,"

Once she leaves the room, I can't contain myself so I get up out of my chair and pace the room, running my fingers through my hair out of frustration.

Can't they just fucking say something so I can go check if she's okay? There's no point in all this if she dies. I need her to stay alive. She's been my only entertainment lately. She's also one of the most tolerable half-bloods I know. Although, I don't like to admit that.

If father knew I was associating with a half-blood, he would be furious.

Of course, he doesn't know anything that goes on at school. He doesn't give a fuck.

"One of you fucking admit to it," I spat, peering over at them.

"Will you stop blaming me? I didn't fucking do anything,"

For once in my life, I can't think of a snarky comeback and it pisses me off.

"Fuck you Diggory,"

I pull out my wand, once again approaching him placing the wand under his neck, causing him to wince from the pain. I look into his eyes, angrily, thinking about what I should do next. Was I sure it was him? Could it have been Pansy? Or someone else completely?

Or was it me? Did I do this to her? Did I hurt her? Did I let her drink too much? No. I couldn't be me. I would never forgive myself.

Pansy chuckles, breaking the tension between me and Diggory.

I look over to her, confused.

What the fuck does she want?

"What do you want Parkinson?" I sneer.

"You two look fucking stupid," she slowly walks up to us with a grin, "at each other's throats the whole time,"

What?

I stare at her, blankly, confused at what's she's getting at.

"It was me, you blithering idiots," she cackles.

What. The. Fuck.

I immediately let go of Cedric and walk up to Pansy. I can't contain my anger. She fucking enrages me to my core. Why the fuck would she do this? Why Evans?

Then what the fuck was Cedric doing with her?

Pansy? Out of everyone? I never would have thought she was smart enough for this but I guess I underestimated her. She's going to fucking pay. I'll make sure of it.

"What the fuck did you do Parkinson?"

I storm over to her, clenching my jaw out of frustration. She needed to feel what Evans was feeling right now.

I wrapped my fingers around her neck as she winced from the pain. She was shocked at what I was doing as fear washed over her face. She was scared of me. Good.

I back her up towards a wall, slightly lifting her as she struggles to breathe.

Fuck you, Pansy. This is what you deserve.

"D- Draco- what are you-" I cut her off.

"What the fuck did you do to her?"

"Draco please-"

"WHAT DID YOU DO TO HER?" I yell in her face as she stares at me, horrified.

What do you expect you fucking dumbass?

"I- I just-" she struggles to say, "Draco I can't- I can't breathe-"

"Draco," Cedric warns.

"FUCKING TELL ME PANSY WHAT DID YOU DO TO HER?"

My grip tightens around her neck, rings pressing into her skin, not letting her take in even the slightest breath. She deserves this... right?

"Draco stop," Cedric tries to cut in, but I completely ignore his existence.

"I just- I just put poison- in- in her drink-" she gasps, her lungs reaching for air.

"You fucking poisoned her?"

The grip around her neck tightens again, her eyes slowly starting to close from the lack of air her lungs are receiving.

"D- Draco-"

"Draco enough!" Cedric yells, pushing me off of Pansy.

Parkinson falls to the floor, gasping for air, grabbing her neck attempting to soothe the pain. I stare down at her, horrified about what I did.

Did I just-

Oh, my Merlin.

No.

I'm turning into father.

No.

"Draco what in the bloody hell are you thinking? You're gonna kill her," Cedric glares at me.

I didn't want to admit I was wrong. I didn't want to seem vulnerable. No.

"She deserves it. She might have killed y/n," I huff, "Do you not care?"

"Of course I fucking care but hurting Pansy won't change anything,"

Out of nowhere, the big, wooden doors swing open as McGonagall storms into the room, jaw to the floor.

"What in the bloody hell happened in here?" she screeches.

Nobody answers.

"It was Pansy professor," I break the silence.

"Merlin's beard miss Parkinson! Come with me right this instant!" She helps Parkinson up off the ground pulling her out of the classroom as she glares back at us, "As for you two, you can serve detention with Filch for the next two weeks. For now, while I deal with miss Parkinson you two can continue on with your night,"

To these words, I immediately storm out of the classroom, down the hall towards the hospital wing. I whip my head around seeing if anyone is behind me. My face was pale with fear and I was sweating as my heart was palpitating out of my chest. I was filled with angst as I see Cedric following me.

Fucking leave.

"Leave Cedric, she doesn't need you right now. She has me," I call out, behind me.

"Bloody hell Malfoy you don't own her,"

She was mine and I would make sure he knew that. She couldn't resist me, just as much as I couldn't resist her. I wasn't going to let Diggory interfere again.

"See? That's where you're wrong," I walk up to him, clenching my fist, pointing a finger at him, "She is mine, and as much as you don't want to admit it, she will always choose me. You're just the best friend, nothing more. You're the safe choice. I'm the better one. She doesn't need you looking out for her anymore. She has me and you need to stay the fuck away,"

My words had a bigger effect than I expected as I watched him crumble on the inside. His eyes became hollow ad empty. Similar to mine. I knew what he was feeling and it was about time someone else felt what I did.

Good.

Feel useless.

Feel empty.

And then go around and try to act tough.

Mask your fucking emotions.

That's what I do every fucking day.

Suck it up you fucking arsehole.

I storm off, leaving Diggory standing in the corridor, emotionless. It felt good to finally know someone else felt the same as I did. I'm no longer alone. I know someone else feels useless. And I hope it stays that way.

I slam open the doors of the hospital wing, jogging down the corridor, past all the beds. There was only one bed that was full. It was where Evans was lying.

I quickly walk up to her, and as I watch her, standing above her, I could see it. A breath. She was breathing.

I could finally let out a sigh of relief, as I collapse onto the bed near her, I look down at her. She's sleeping peacefully, eyelashes resting perfectly on her face. There was a small smudge of makeup on her cheek.

She looks so peaceful, I don't want her to wake up, but I want to touch her perfect skin. As weird as it sounds it would be comforting for me to know completely she is okay.

I wish I could show this affection to her every day. She deserves it, but I just can't look vulnerable. I can't trust her completely just yet. I don't need another person stabbing me in my back. Especially after what Pansy did.

Her slow breaths cause her chest to rise and fall, as her fingers twitch. I place my hand softly onto her cheek, rubbing my thumb over the smudge of black makeup. I slowly rub on it, wiping it away. She looked perfect as ever.

"I'm so glad you're okay darling," I whisper.

To this, her eyes start to flutter open, looking around with a panicked expression. Once she sees me, she takes a sigh of relief, smiling up at me. Her smile was sweet and comforting. It was like mumsy's smile. It made my heart flutter, but in a much better way. Different than mumsy's. It made me happy to see her okay.

"It's alright, I'm here," I whisper,"

I'll always be here.

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