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๐“๐“ฒ๐“ท๐“ฎ๐“ฝ๐“ฎ๐“ฎ๐“ท ~ ๐“œ๐“พ๐“ฏ๐“ฏ๐“ต๐“ฒ๐“ช๐“ฝ๐“ธ

~

y/n = your name

~

*Evans*

Sitting on the edge of Malfoyโ€™s bed, you look up at him with curious but lustful eyes; his were stern and unforgiving as he towered over you, waiting for your reaction. You were in awe of how he looked. Sure, he smelt horrid, but it could be ignored by how captivating he stood in front of you.

This enticed you to listen to him. You slowly stand up, adjusting a bra strap the had curiously slipped off your shoulder.

You hesitantly walk over to him, looking into his alluring eyes. He grabs your chin, rings hitting your skin from the metal bands on his fingers. The fingers that would hopefully soon be inside of you.

There was a sly grin etched upon his face as his teeth graze his lips, looking you up and down with hungry eyes. His right hand was still wrapped around your jawline, his other you could feel run up the back of your neck, into the back of your hair.

This made you shiver as his hand makes its way to the top of your head, fingers tangled in your locks. He then slowly pushes your head down, indicating he wanted you to get down.

You obey, lowering onto your knees, still looking up at him. You were nervous that you couldnโ€™t please him as well as youโ€™d like, even though last time, you seemed to have done a brilliant job.

You could still feel his fingers interlaced with your hair as you continue to stare into his salacious yet eerily serene grey orbs. You slowly lower to the ground as you feel your bare knees come in contact with the cold and hard floor. You knew there would be marks once you were finished.

You continue to make eye contact with Malfoy, not breaking the tension as you slide your fingers around the front of his black belt, starting to undo it, every clink of metal making your heart pound in your chest harder and faster. You then grab the zipper, slowly pulling it down as Malfoyโ€™s sly grin widens.

โ€œGood girl,โ€ you hear him whisper under his breath, causing you to slightly widen your eyes with surprise.

This tempted you more, causing you to tighten your chest as you started to breathe more heavily.

Finally, you break the tension as your gaze moves towards his trousers. You tug at the hem, sliding them down his legs, leaving him in his grey boxers exposing his bulge. You look up at him, waiting for a reaction or some sort of right away from him but all he does is glide his teeth over his lips with an unsatisfied look upon his face.

You move your gaze back down to his boxers as you slowly pull them down, revealing his growing erection.

Oh. My. Merlin.

I forgot how big it was.

Once his boxers hit the floor, you start to open your mouth, twirling your tongue around the base of his dick, supporting yourself with your hands on the floor.

A small groan escapes Dracoโ€™s lips as you continue to drag your tongue up his length, reaching his shaft, beginning to repeat the process as you whirl your tongue around the end of his dick.

You were worried that you werenโ€™t doing a good enough job until you peered up at him and watch as he throws his head back, mouth gaped open.

โ€œF- Fuck- Fucking hell,โ€

To this, your heart begins to race as a wave of excitement takes over. The feeling of confidence takes over your body as you realize how much power you have at this moment. You speed up as your mind is thrown into the backseat and your body takes over.

And what your body wanted was him. To please him.

You wrap your fingers around the base of his dick, starting to suck as you bob your head up and down, moans escaping his lips. You peer up at him, mouth gaped open as countless moans are released from his lips. You watch as he lifts his hand, placing it on the canopy of the bed, as he leans into it, leaning all his weight on it.

Fuck heโ€™s sexy.

Watching his reaction and state, you realize...youโ€™re in control. It was exciting; stirring, really. He has almost always had the higher power in these situations but seeing his vulnerable state gave you an idea. To this realization, you decide to start sucking harder, thrusting his dick into your mouth, sucking harder each time.

โ€œY/n- fucking- fuck,โ€

Bobbing your head up and down, his dick becomes coated in a layer of your saliva, making it easier to thrust his cock deeper and deeper into your mouth. You gag a few times, but completely ignore it as his moaning turns you on more than it ever has.

You begin to tighten your lips around his dick, twisting your hands around his length. You suck harder and harder, moving up and down faster and faster. You swear you could feel it in your throat.

โ€œBloody hell- bloody hell Evans-โ€ Draco struggles to say between groans, โ€œI- I think Iโ€™m gonna- Iโ€™m gonna cum,โ€

You continue to suck on his dick mercilessly as his groans become louder and louder. If it werenโ€™t for โ€˜Muffliato,โ€™ he would be heard from the corridor.

You feel his cock throbbing in your mouth as he thrusts one last time into your mouth. You felt his warm liquid shoot to the back of your throat, causing you to gag. You decide to swallow it, sending a shock down your spine as you release your lips from his dick, pulling your mouth from it as a trail of saliva follows.

Draco looks down at you, panting just as hard, if not harder than you are with a sharp grin as he slowly crouches down to your level where you are now sitting back on your heels with your lips slightly pursed.

He places his hand on your chin, grabbing it as he runs his thumb over your plumped lips, gathering the saliva from them. He then moves his hand to his face, sticking his thumb into his own mouth, licking his thumb clean.

Your heart is palpitating in your chest as you stride over to the edge of his bed, sitting down, attempting to regain a normal breathing pattern.

You look up at Draco and to your surprise, heโ€™s also walking over to where you were sitting, but with a sly grin depicted upon his face and one of his hands continuing to jerk himself off.

You thought your face of surprise wasnโ€™t noticeable but you were wrong. You knew he could very clearly tell you were shocked by the small chuckle he let out.

โ€œOh babygirl, Iโ€™m nowhere near done with you,โ€ he growls lowly.

Malfoy reaches the edge of the bed and grasps onto your waist, as you feel your feet lift off the ground and your back hit the sleekness of the silk sheets.

You watch as he strides up to the bed where you were lying, almost fully naked. He places his hands on both sides of your waist, moving his head down until itโ€™s in line with your hips. He peers up at you as you were now leaning up, on your elbows, looking down at him twitching at every small move he made.

Draco moves his gaze back down to your hips as he leans in, placing a trail of wet kisses up your hip bone, as you throw your head back in pleasure bitting down hard on your lip, holding back the urge to let out a small moan.

You start to bite down harder on your lip, unable to hold back the moans of pleasure as he began to suck on a sensitive part of your stomach. You clench the silk sheets, letting out a small groan which you wish you hadnโ€™t. Once the moan escapes your lips, you feel him stop in his tracks and feel his teeth come in contact with your skin as he bites down on a small but sensitive part of your skin, making you wince from the slight pain. You watch as he jerks his head up, peering up at you.

Before you could collect your thoughts to make out what expression he has on his face, you hear him start to talk.

โ€œI donโ€™t remember saying you could make noise,โ€

You bite down harder on your lip hoping he would continue tracing your body with his lips. Although, it would be difficult to hold back any more moans if he satisfies you even more.

Malfoy continues to trail kisses up your stomach, up your chest, stopping to leave a few hickeys along your breasts, moving towards your nipples. Your back arches as he wraps his lips around one of your nipples, slowly starting to suck on them making your throat tighten and, causing you to finally lean all your weight back onto the bed, pulling your elbows from underneath you.

Leaning back on the bed, you feel Draco begin to continue caressing your neck with his tongue, until he reaches your chin, at that point leaving a soft kiss on your cheekbone. He pulls out, looking into your eyes, keen as ever.

He leans in, connecting his teeth with your ear as he lightly bites down, causing you to wince from the slight stinging. You feel his warm yet rancid breath blow up against your cheek as he begins to whisper softly into your ear.

โ€œIโ€™m gonna make you cum so hard youโ€™re never gonna even think about disobeying me again,โ€

Your throat tightens and your eyes widen with surprise as you feel Dracoโ€™s hand trace down the side of your hips, meeting with the hem of your underwear as he lightly tugs on them indicating he wanted them off.

You lift your hips off the surface of the bed, as he slips your underwear down your thighs and off of you, sending a shock up your spine as your heat meets with the frigid air around you.

Looking into Malfoyโ€™s eyes, you watch as he slowly lowers off the bed, standing at the edge, positioned between your legs.

Grabbing your waist, he flips you around, positioning you so your hips were in line with his. With one hand on his length and the other around your waist, he starts to rub the tip of his dick over your entrance, causing you to take in a short breath, trying to stay quiet.

Without warning, Malfoy plunges his cock into you, harder than you expected him to. He gave you no time to get used to his size which was needed due to how big he was.

He moved his other hand to the other side of your waist, thrusting himself into you a second time. This time, the pleasure was too much for you to hold back. You let out a loud moan, arching your back as he plunges deeper into you, your walls tightening around his dick.

The rings on his fingers press against your skin as his grip on your hips tightened.

โ€œThatโ€™s it-โ€ he struggles to say, panting, โ€œfucking- let it all out- fuck-โ€

He continued pumping in and out of you, each making you scream louder and louder.

Thank Merlin for Muffliato.

โ€œF- fuck- Evans- youโ€™re so- fuck,โ€

He continued pounding into you, mercilessly, the only sound was the screams and groans escaping both of your lips.

You swear you could feel him in your stomach as he pounded once more into you, pulling out for a few seconds, re0adjusting your position.

Draco once again, flipped you onto your back, as he once again climbed onto the bed, kneeling on the black silk sheets. You felt his rings press into your ankles as he grabbed them, throwing your legs over his shoulders.

He then once again, plunged into you causing another scream to emit your lips.

Your breathing was ragged and your heart was pounding in your chest as you grasped the sheets with one hand, and Dracoโ€™s arm with the other. His arms were holding your legs close to his chest, continuing to thrust into you, as your bodies were pattering against one another.

โ€œWho do you belong to?โ€ he asks out of nowhere, panting as he throws his head back with pleasure, mouth gaped open.

โ€œI-โ€

โ€œWho the fuck- who the fuck do you belong to Evans?โ€ he jerked his head back to look at you.

โ€œY- You-โ€

โ€œSay my- say my fucking name- fuck-โ€

โ€œDraco- Draco,โ€ you scream his name, jerking your head back, tightening your grip on the sheets.

โ€œYouโ€™re my filthy little slut,โ€

Usually, him calling you that would boil your blood but this time, it actually- turned you on. A lot.

To this, he began to thrust harder into you. You began to scream louder - so loud, your throat was starting to hurt.

This was much better than last time. Every time fucking Draco was a whole new experience - and a damn good one.

His grip around your legs tightened as you felt your legs start to tremble as he continued to pound mercilessly into you. You never wanted this to end.

โ€œDraco- fuck-โ€ you scream.

โ€œEvans Iโ€™m gonna- Iโ€™m gonna cum-โ€

โ€œTogether-โ€ you pant.

At the same time, his grip around your legs tightens as you feel his rings pressing into your skin, just adding to the pleasure. You grab onto the sheets and swear you could feel your nails creating holes in the fabric.

Your walls around his dick tighten as he thrusts one last time into you, your legs trembling as you both let out one final scream. You felt his warm liquid shoot into you, as you throw your head back, mouth gaped open.

Your screams start to lessen into loud pants as he pulls out of you, rolling over and plopping into bed beside you. Your chest was rising and falling as you struggle to take in a full breath. Your heart was pounding in your chest when you soon realize - you wonโ€™t be able to walk very well for the next while.

You could feel the inside of your thighs throbbing as your legs were trembling.

Draco quickly sits up, grabbing his wand from his dresser, waving it at you casting the โ€˜Ceptivoโ€™ charm.

He walks over to his dresser where he had a shirt neatly folded. He unravels it, holding it out in front of you.

โ€œHere, put this on,โ€

You sit up, taking the shirt from his hand, sliding it over your head and over your body. It was too big so it hung all the way to above your knees.

He then grabs the duvet from the bed, pulling it over your sweaty bodies.

For a few minutes, you two lay, bodies pressed against one another, trying to regain normal breathing patterns and heart rates but it definitely was a struggle.

Now that you werenโ€™t moving around, you start to shiver from the cool air of the dungeons.

A shock fills your body as you feel Malfoyโ€™s hand come in contact with your waist, as he slides it down to your thigh where he begins to rub his thumb up and down, distracting you from the cold.

You hadnโ€™t realized how close Draco was to you until you felt the warmth of his breath fan the back of your neck.

Your eyes felt droopy as if they would shut at any moment. With his hand resting on your waist, you felt comfortable and all your thoughts disappeared.

~

*Malfoy*

As she lie in front of me, eyes drooping closed, all I can think about is how her waist feels in my hand. I feel secure around her.

Of course, she can never know that.

Itโ€™s cute. Her eyes drooping closed. Sheโ€™s trying so hard to stay awake yet I know sheโ€™s gonna fall asleep.

Was it selfish of me to fuck her? I mean after her being poisoned and all?

Fuck.

No. She wanted it. Surely. Or she would have said no. She surely enjoyed it.

What the fuck Draco? Get yourself together. She fucking loved it. I mean itโ€™s me. What girl doesnโ€™t want me?

My thoughts are broken by a soft sigh coming from Evans. She looks so peaceful. The way her lips sit perfectly together. The way her eyelashes rest perfectly over her eyelids.

Sheโ€™s asleep.

I lift my hand, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear and out of her face.

She really is a brilliant sight.

I hate to ask, but I do wonder.

โ€œAm I in your dreams? Or nightmares?โ€

I whisper ever so quietly that there was no chance of her waking up.

No girl has ever made me feel this deeply before. This has to be wrong. I canโ€™t be falling for her... can I?

No.

Fuck no.

I feel fucking disgusting.

I feel so fucking vulnerable.

I need a shower.

I slowly pull the duvet off of me, standing up tucking it tighter around her body, hoping she doesnโ€™t get too cold.

I always hated how cold it was in the dungeons. It was always unpleasant. Iโ€™m almost certain the Gryffindors have warmer and cozier dorms. I hate coming to school and the halls feel just as vast and frigid as the ones back at home and my room feeling just as lonely and empty as it is at home.

Although, with y/n here, itโ€™s not half as bad.

I walk over to the washroom, grabbing a white towel from my dresser on my way as I pull off my button-up shirt which Iโ€™m surprised she didnโ€™t take off. It wouldโ€™ve been fucking hot if she left a trail of kisses down my chest as I did to her.

I continue walking towards the shower, hanging my towel on the wall. I step into the shower, turning the faucet, letting the cold water pour down onto me. As the cold water patters along my back, I feel a slight stinging sensation but it barely fazes me. I turn the warm water on and as the water heats up, I lean my head back, soaking my hair, ridding it of sweat and filth.

I usually love showers because it helps rid my brain of any uncertainty or weakness. But this time, itโ€™s doing the exact opposite. My mind is riddled with thoughts.

I fucking hate her.

I fucking hate her for her fucking stubbornness.

For her fucking nerve.

Because I canโ€™t fucking read her.

I canโ€™t fucking read those fucking eyes of hers.

I grab the shampoo bottle, starting to squeeze some into my hand.

Especially when theyโ€™re bright and big.

I squeeze it harder.

When theyโ€™re angry.

Soap is seeping through my fingertips onto the shower floor.

I just wanna fucking-

I fucking-

I wanna fucking kiss her.

I wanna kiss her.

Fuck.

Sheโ€™s making me vulnerable.

Fuck this.

I canโ€™t have her change who I am.

Iโ€™ve never been vulnerable.

Fuck.

Everything was so much easier before she decided to show up.

Why did she have to ruin it?

I was fucking fine being hated by everyone in the school.

I canโ€™t have her fancying me.

She canโ€™t handle my bullshit.

Sheโ€™s too good for me.

Fucking hell.

I need to fuck up.

I need to show her Iโ€™m no good for her.

I need her to hate me.

For both of our sakes.

She needs to hate me and as painful as itโ€™s gonna be to watch, everything has to go back to normal.

When everything was easier.

Yes.

It has to be.

This is the right thing.

Fuck I hate myself.

I look down to the bottle cracked, shampoo seeping out. A heaping pile of shampoo in my hand and a trail dribbling to the floor.

Fuck.

~

I step out of the steamy bathroom with a towel wrapped around my waist to find Evans still sleeping soundly on the bed.

She looks too peaceful I refuse to disturb.

I walk over to my dresser, grabbing my sweatpants and quidditch shirt which were neatly folded on top of one another. I really didnโ€™t feel like getting dressed up. I never do. Iโ€™ve just been expected to wear it and itโ€™s become the norm for me.

In full honesty, sweatpants are much more comfortable than the whole tux, although the tux does look brilliant on me according to most girls; I donโ€™t see it.

I slip the towel off from around my waist, careless about Evans being in the room since Iโ€™m certain she wonโ€™t wake up for at least another fifteen minutes. I slip on my boxers which were followed by the grey sweat pants. I pull the strings taught around my waist, taking the towel to ruffle my hair.

I throw it into my laundry basket, grabbing my jersey and walking over to where Evans lay, stunning as ever.

For some reason, out of all the girls that have fallen asleep in my bed, she looks the most astonishing. Every time I was in the same room as her, I feel this - warm feeling that I can never seem to shake.

The last time I remember feeling that feeling was six years ago when mum took me tobogganing during my Christmas break. I remember it vividly.

~

๐“•๐“ต๐“ช๐“ผ๐“ฑ๐“ซ๐“ช๐“ฌ๐“ด

My boots gather snow at the toes as I run as fast as possible through the ankle-deep blanket of snow on the ground. Mum is much faster than I am considering she can lift her feet high enough over the snow with much less effort than I need.

โ€œMum! Get back here!โ€ I laugh rather loudly as I watch mumsy turn her head, looking back at me from a few feet away.

Behind me is a toboggan attached to a string which I was grasping in one hand. I watch as mum stops in her tracks, holding the hat in her hand, waving it around as if she was trying to lure a bull with a red cloth.

I scrunch my nose, shooting her a playfully dirty look as I speed up, dropping the string of the toboggan as I do so.

โ€œCome get it for yourself,โ€ she giggles.

I try to keep an angry face, but I canโ€™t hold back the stretching smile that appeared on my face moments later.

Finally reaching where mumsy was standing, I jump in the air as she lifts it higher so I am unable to reach it.

โ€œGive- it- back-โ€ I laugh as I jump in between each word.

Mum just laughs at my failed attempt to fetch my hat as she lowers it, letting me grasp it.

With the hat finally in my possession once more, I let out a sigh of relief, heart palpitating in my chest.

I lean my hands on my knees, bending down attempting to retain a normal breathing pattern once again.

With one more sigh, I fall back, hitting my back against the snow in a starfish position, limbs sprawled out. I look up at mum who has a sweet smile stretched upon her face as she too lay down beside me in the blanket of snow.

We both stare at the clouds for a few minutes, which felt like hours, admiring the different shapes and sizes of the fluffy balls of cotton which lay near the sun. My mind starts to wander as I think about what it would be like to be up in the sky, one with the clouds. No worries, no responsibilities, no expectations. Just float with the wind and see where it leads me.

I look back to mum, who already had her eyes on me, with a small grin on her face. To my surprise, thereโ€™s a tear rolling down the side of her face. Whatโ€™s weird about it is that she didnโ€™t seem at all sad. She seemed calmer than anything.

โ€œCome, darling,โ€ she says, weakly.

I scooch myself over to her, resting my head on her chest as she places her hand on my cheek, sending a shock through my body as her warm hand compensated with the freezing atmosphere around us. She slowly rubs her thumb up and down on my cheek, pulling me closer as we both look back up at the sky, no more words shared with each other.

It was quiet.

Calm.

Safe.

~

That was the last time I have ever felt that warmth - until now of course.

And it angers me.

It fucking angers me.

All it took was her.

Evans.

For some odd reason, that pissed me off more than anything. That she made me feel like this.

Mumsy was the only one who could make me feel warm and safe and I want it to stay that way.

While these thoughts travel through my mind, bringing up old memories of mumsy and I, I grab another, smaller pair of sweat pants, placing them at the foot of the bed for Evans to find when she awakens.

I stride over the door, taking one last glance at y/n peacefully sleeping on her side, her chest rising and falling as she breathes calmly.

Quietly shutting the door behind me, I gather myself, walking down the corridor to the common room, where I hope to find Pansy.

I need to get rid of this feeling of vulnerability.

I donโ€™t feel anything for this girl - I canโ€™t.

I wonโ€™t allow it.

Itโ€™s just a phase.

~

I turn the corner, and to my surprise, the mess from last night had been cleaned up. The stench was gone and the last of the Slytherins who had passed out before had now left to their common rooms I assume.

I walk over to the couch, taking a seat as I look into the flames of the fireplace, thinking - as usual.

I fucking hate this.

That I need to do this.

I ruin everything anyway.

If anything were to happen with Evans, I would somehow fuck up.

Might as well do it now before it causes more damage to the poor girl.

I really do feel bad for her.

Every girl that has ever fancied me has always been disappointed in the end.

Except one.

Pansy.

โ€œDraco?โ€ I whip my head around to see who called my name.

It was Pansy.

Our eyes meet and I could sense she was upset. She looked confused and confuzzled.

I sigh, moving my gaze once again to the fire.

โ€œHello Parkinson,โ€ I say, weakly.

โ€œWhat are you doing here?โ€

โ€œI could ask you the same,โ€

โ€œWhat do you mean?โ€

โ€œAfter your attempted murder on Evans? Everyone was sure youโ€™d be expelled,โ€

โ€œWell if you must know, Dracy-โ€

โ€œDonโ€™t fucking call me that,โ€ I spat.

Without warning, I feel Pansyโ€™s hand touch my shoulder, running down the front of my chest.

โ€œIf you must know, Draco,โ€ she corrects herself, โ€œI was excused from any punishment, considering-โ€ she pauses.

โ€œConsidering what?โ€

I feel her hand make its way under the hem of my shirt, through the neckline, meeting with my chest.

โ€œConsidering my- my schizophrenia,โ€

My eyes widen in surprise as I look up at her, confused about how that could be.

โ€œOh, Draco donโ€™t be silly. Iโ€™m sure you already knew,โ€

โ€œNo- actually. I didnโ€™tโ€

Her hand makes its way farther under my shirt as my throat tenses up, but I attempt to hide my discomfort as her other hand massages my shoulder near my neck.

As her fingers press into my skin, I felt the tension of my muscles finally calm and I felt relaxed.

โ€œWell, now you know. But-โ€ I feel her lips come in contact with the back of my ear, as she begins to whisper, the strong scent of perfume hitting my neck, โ€œyou donโ€™t think of me any differently, do you, Draco?โ€

I gulp ever so slightly as I take a deep breath, moving my hand up to meet with her cheek.

I know this is bad.

I know I shouldnโ€™t be doing this.

But it needs to be done.

I turn my head to the side, looking into Pansyโ€™s deep brown eyes which seemed puffy from her crying. My lips were less than an inch away from my face.

Sheโ€™s a terrible person.

Why am I doing this?

No matter her condition, it didnโ€™t make it right. Not that I can speak for myself since almost all that I do I try to justify even though I know itโ€™s wrong.

Just like this.

Whatโ€™s happening now is not right. But Iโ€™m trying to justify it with my selfishness.

Iโ€™m not that selfish, am I?

Iโ€™m doing this for her.

Right?

โ€œNo of course not Pansy,โ€ I lie.

โ€œGood,โ€ she breathes.

Our faces inch closer together even though it feels as if they were too close to get any nearer without touching.

Out of nowhere, she immediately pulls out, pulling her hand out of my shirt as I let out a quiet sigh of relief. Pansy starts dragging her hand along the head of the couch, not breaking eye contact. She circles around the couch, standing directly in front of me, looking down.

She then puts her hands on either side of me, as she slowly moves her legs onto me, lowering them on either side of me until sheโ€™s straddled on top of my lap. All her weight is right over my dick as she slowly starts to shift her weight from side to side, making me take in a deep breath.

Here we go.

Her shifting her weight on my dick feels so good. Too good.

This wrong.

Very wrong.

But it needs to be done.

I wrap my arms around her waist, pulling her body closer to me as she dives her head down, placing a long, wet kiss on my lips.

It was obvious she wants to see if I would pull away. I want to. I really do. But I wonโ€™t.

She pulls out looking at me as her teeth graze her lips, as she bites them, looking me up and down.

Fuck this is hot.

But itโ€™sโ€™ so wrong.

So, so wrong.

She continues to shift her hips from side to side as she dives in for another kiss, hands on my cheeks. She pulls me closer so our bodies are now touching.

This brings memories flooding back. Memories of when I was fucking Pansy. It was nice, sure, but all thatโ€™s on my mind right now is Evans.

Our small pecks become mouth gaping kisses as I feel Pansyโ€™s tongue graze mine. I hate this. I fucking hate this.

Our tongues dance as she presses her body more onto mine, my hands still on her hips. I slide my hands up her back, under her shirt, pulling her all that bit closer.

To my surprise, Pansy begins to lift herself off of my hips, bouncing up and down on my dick. To this, I start to get an erection. One that I canโ€™t control. But I wish I could because I hate it. I hate it more than anything. I canโ€™t do this anymore. I canโ€™t anymore.

Fucking hell-

โ€œStop-โ€ I say, lightly pushing back on Pansyโ€™s chest.

Her lips continue to crash onto mine, attempting to keep the kiss from dying. I didnโ€™t want this. No. I didnโ€™t and Iโ€™m sure about it.

โ€œPansy- enough-โ€ I try to push her off of me but she refuses to let me go.

She pushes down onto me once more.

My throat tightens and I take a short breath. My stomach churns from disgust as I wrap my fingers around her neck with no hesitation, holding her back.

โ€œI said enough Pansy. What the fuck donโ€™t you get about that?โ€

Her face goes pale with fear. My fingers were once again digging into the skin on her neck. A bit too far.

I immediately let go, ashamed of my actions.

Fuck.

Pansy immediately climbs off of me, standing in front of me once again. From the look in her eyes, she was also ashamed.

โ€œDraco- Iโ€™m- Iโ€™m so sorry,โ€ she says weakly, rubbing her neck, โ€œIโ€™ll go now,โ€

Pansy speeds out of the common room and I sit back, taking a sigh of relief.

Fucking hell. I fucked up. I always fuck up.

It wasnโ€™t my fault, was it?

Pansy wouldnโ€™t stop.

I had to.

Right?

My cloud of thoughts vanish as my eyes focus on a figure standing in front of me, on the other side of the common room.

My heart drops.

What have I done?

Itโ€™s Evans.

Sheโ€™s in my sweatpants and shirt. The pants barely fit around her waist as they were too big for her. The shirt dragged down to at least her thighs. It was adorable. But the look she gave me was not.

Thereโ€™s a tear rolling down her face as she looks me dead in the eye, the look sheโ€™s giving me is unreadable.

She looked sad but angry. So very angry.

She scoffs, almost disgusted to see my face.

I get that.

Iโ€™m disgusted to see myself sometimes.

Thatโ€™s a lie.

Most of the time.

Without hesitation, she storms up to me, all the sadness diminishing and all that was left in her eyes was anger. So much of it. It was terrifying. Itโ€™s just like fatherโ€™s.

โ€œWhat the fuck Malfoy?โ€ She exclaims, piercing words echoing through the common room, โ€œyou- foul- fucking- blithering- fucking- you fucking arsehole- youโ€™re a fucking arshole Malfoy!โ€

With each pause in her words, she takes a swing to my chest, pushing me back farther and farther towards the wall.

I donโ€™t know what to do other than to let her get all her anger out. Get it all out of her system so she could hopefully listen to what I have to say.

A tear rolls down her eye as she just stands in front of me, looking into my eyes. Now all I could see was pain. I hurt her. I knew I would. But I didnโ€™t exactly think this through.

โ€œWhat? so now youโ€™re just not gonna talk to me? You know what-โ€

I stand up against the wall as she pounds a few times on my chest, letting out all her anger.

โ€œYou fucking came in me half an hour ago,โ€ she scoffs, โ€œthe audacity. The fucking audacity.โ€

Now, this got on my nerve.

โ€œI was fucking doing it for you. Be thankful,โ€

I donโ€™t know why I said it. It just slipped off my tongue.

Did I mean it?

No.

But I said it.

โ€œWOW- wow- How the fuck was this for me?โ€

She doesnโ€™t understand. She wouldnโ€™t. Nobody does. Nobody ever tries to.

I scoff.

โ€œYou wouldnโ€™t understand,โ€

Evans places her hands on my chest, reaching up on her tippy toes, getting nearer to my face.

โ€œFucking try me Malfoy,โ€ she spat.

I donโ€™t say anything, not wanting her to see my vulnerability. I donโ€™t want to tell her. I donโ€™t think I ever will. And after this moment, I donโ€™t think there will be another chance for me to tell her.

โ€œWhy should it matter? Weโ€™re not dating anyways,โ€

Again, me spitting snarky comments like theyโ€™re nothing. Itโ€™s all I know. All I can think of in the moment.

Y/n pushes off my chest so I hit my back against the rigid wall and scoffs.

She turns to walk away and all I feel like doing is grabbing her wrist to pull her back. I want her here, beside me. I donโ€™t know why - I just do.

~

*Evans*

I fucking hate him.

Why there fuck would he do this?

I actually thought he was starting to care.

I guess people never change.

You were hurt. As much as you didnโ€™t want to be, you were hurt.

You thought maybe you were starting to understand him a little more than you did before. But heโ€™s just another stupid fucking guy who has zero respect for you and your feelings.

Fuck him.

You speed out of the common room, down the corridor, beeline to the Gryffindor common room. Tears were running down your face as you tried to hold them back, sucking in, you felt as though someone was compressing your lungs.

You were tired; exhausted really.

You needed your best friend. Since she seemed to be the only person left.

~

You reach the front of the Gryffindor common room at the perfect time as a small group of Gryffindor girls flood into the room. You follow behind, wiping the tears as you pass by many untroubled Gryffindors slacking back on the comfortable worn-down sofa.

You make eye contact with a few people who shoot you a dirty look, but one, in particular, gives you a kind smile instead.

Ginny Weasley.

She had always been another one of your favourite Gryffindors. Especially because sheโ€™s grown closer with Hermione over the years.

~

Reaching Hermioneโ€™s door, you knock on it, quite loudly as you hear the lock click and a faint โ€œcome in,โ€ being shouted from inside.

You open the door and Hermione who was slouched back on her bed reading an old, worn down book, jolts up as her eyebrows narrow with disgust but soon, they soften as she opens her arms, giving you a warm and inviting hug.

โ€œOh love, what happened?โ€

โ€œThat fucking ferret. Heโ€™s a fucking- heโ€™s an arsehole,โ€ you sniffle.

You continue telling her most of what happened and the whole situation with Pansy.

โ€œPansy wouldnโ€™t- would she?โ€

You nod, โ€œshe did. Iโ€™m so sorry Mione,โ€

She sighs, โ€œItโ€™s fine. Itโ€™s fine. Iโ€™ll deal with her later,โ€

For the next few hours, you spend with Hermione, talk over what happened with Draco and ranting about everything that annoyed you about him. She had most of the input, talking about the rude comments he makes towards her and other people who are muggle-born.

โ€œSo what happened? With- Pansy?โ€ you were hesitant to ask but needed to see where your friendship lie after your fight.

โ€œWell, if you must know, I havenโ€™t spoken to her yet, but I plan on it,โ€

Silence.

You didnโ€™t really know what else to say so you decide to stay silent.

You two lie on your back while Hermione had her wand in her hand, waving it at the ceiling, practicing her charms as she whispered under her breath, drawing all sorts of shapes in the air.

โ€œIโ€™m sorry,โ€ you break the silence.

โ€œFor?โ€

โ€œFor assuming that Pansy did it,โ€

โ€œHonestly, y/n, I would have reacted the same. I should be the one to apologize,โ€ she sits up, grabbing ahold of your hand, looking you in the eye, โ€œIโ€™ve barely know Parkinson a month. I wasnโ€™t acting rationally and I shouldโ€™ve,โ€

You take a sigh, leaning your head back.

โ€œI thought I would lose you,โ€

โ€œNever,โ€ she gives a kind smile, โ€œyou will never lose me,โ€

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