I turn my body so we're facing each other but quickly hide my face in his chest. He strokes my hair as he hugs me tight, none of us utter even a word despite his serious enquiry just now.
"Okay, you don't have to tell me anything," He kisses the top of my head multiple times, "But I hope you wouldn't do anything before speaking to me."
I sure know the real meaning behind it. But I choose to keep quiet and hug him back. I love this man so much both of us know very well the fact that he doesn't deserve to be with someone like me.
He deserves better, someone who would treat him the way he should be treated. Not with a half ass attitude I'm giving right now.
I finally lift my face after gathering all the courage I'd need to discuss about this, reaching for his lips. He clearly isn't in a good mood because he doesn't return my kiss the way he always does, but he kisses me back still.
"Would you hate me if I stay with you just for your money?"
"You did that months ago."
He's right, I did do that. I said yes the moment he offered two grand a week.
But I also said no when the contract was terminated. He might have persisted to deposit the same amount of money but I refused to accept it. For every cent he deposited into my account, I'd cash it and return to him by hand, because he's being stubborn until today that he keeps on depositing those money. Well guess what, I'm stubborn too.
"I will always love you, Precious. You're the first, and only woman I've ever loved. And I love you very, very much, in case you haven't noticed already."
"I love you too, Owen." I kiss him briefly with tears wetting my eyes.
"If I can make you stay with my money, by all means take it all. Take everything. As long as you take me as well. Make me your toy boy, your cook, your cleaner, driver, anything. I'll do anything, everything for you. You can have everything I own."
"Yes, everything. You can even have all my babies."
I smile with his little manipulation to rope me into that conversation.
"I had a pregnancy scare yesterday." I tell him in a low tone, to which he quickly lowers his body so we're at the same eye level.
"So you're not pregnant?"
"I don't know yet."
He is definitely puzzled, "Does that mean you haven't taken the test?"
"I did take one."
"And? I thought pregnancy tests take like 5 minutes to show the result? Which pharmacy did you buy this test at? Do we need to wait the entire 48 hours to get the result?"
I hit his chest lightly as I chuckle, which in return makes him smile.
"It's too soon to know. We have to wait for another two weeks to get an accurate result."
I nod, "I got a negative."
And there's the reaction I've been nervous about; a frown. I know he loves me, and he wants to be with me. I also know he wants me to have his babies. But I was not sure if now is the time he wants to have it with me. This frown pretty much answers my worries.
"The girls said maybe it's a false negative. So we have to wait until I miss my period."
"Which is next week."
I smile knowing he's very aware of my menstrual cycle.
"Does that mean you're staying?" The hopeful tone is not to be missed. I hate how my answer is gonna disappoint him.
"I'm still going."
"But you could be pregnant."
"Pregnant ladies can still travel. I'm going to big cities, not a rural, third world country. If anything happens-"
"Nothing's gonna happen, Baby." He narrows his eyes giving me warning not to say those words.
"This could be the last vacation I'm gonna have as a single, free-"
"So you're gonna keep it?" This is more hopeful than the previous one.
"Of course I'm gonna keep it. I might be that selfish bitch you fell in love with but I'm not that selfish to get rid of my own baby. I love it already. If-"
His lips attack mine before I managed to finish saying everything but I gladly accept his kiss. We make out with his hand squeezing everything he can get to as he eats my tongue.
"I'm going, Owen." I reply harshly at his relentless persuasion for me to cancel my summer vacation.
"What could be more important than to keep you safe? Can't you wait until the baby's out? I promise I'll take you anywhere you want to go."
"It's not about that, it's about my ritual with the girls. We've done this since the past four years."
"I'm sure they'll understand. I'll even pay for everyone if you postpone the trip to next year."
"The baby is not even out yet but you're already dictating my life?" I step off the bed and walk out of the bedroom, wanting some space from this man. He's suffocating me.
"Part of me is inside of you right now so I pretty much have a say to forbid you from going this Tuesday."
The fight goes on the entire weekend but he shows no signs of giving up. In fact he makes me tired with his persistence arguments that I'm this close to agree with whatever he wants as long as he leaves me alone for five minutes.
For someone as understanding and forgiving as Owen, I have never seen this side of him. He clearly has loved this baby too much, I am definitely torn between feeling angry at his stubbornness and proud for having such a protective, caring man in my life. Our life.
That Monday morning he called a gynae on speaker, wanting a professional's opinion since I'm not saying yes to his request to postpone the trip. I was packing my stuffs when he came and asked the gynae to repeat what she said earlier to him.
In the end we agreed to take the blood test since it's the only test that can detect pregnancies this early. He didn't even let me change and hauled me in my casual wear -his shirt and a pair of shorts- to his car and off we go to the hospital.
"I can't wait to get a positive so I can send you out for a donut during a storm." I clench my teeth as he steps on the gas.
He chuckles despite his erratic behaviour just now to not even wait for five minutes for me to dress appropriately, "Ohhh I can't wait for another Estelle Evans in my life."