Chapter 5...An alcoholic
Justin pulls up at a nice cosy looking restaurant,he goes out and comes to my side he opens the side of my door and smiles at me and and I squik a small thank you to him after he closes the door and locks the car he holds my hand and my stomach gets butterflies immediately he ushers us inside the nice restaurant and iam hit by the mouthwatering smell of different foods and my stomach growls and I know Justin heard it but he pretends he didn't hear anything and iam grateful for that because iam red as a tomato from embarrassment and I quickly try to take my hand away from his but his grip tightens still not looking at me and I flush some more,we are quickly seated and only then he releases my hand and I miss the warmth of his hand,a waiter comes to our table and asks what we are going to drink and Justin orders a double whiskey on the rocks and I can't help the frown that comes to my face at this because it's not even 3pm and he is driving us and is he not going back to college after this? I am thinking maybe he is an alcoholic that does not want to admit that he is,anyway I don't say anything and iam snapped out of my thoughts when he asks me what would I like to drink.
"I will have cranberry juice please" I answer looking at the waiter and I quickly look down at my menu avoiding his eyes because I can feel his intense eyes on me and I can also feel that he is not pleased with my move right now,the waiter asks if we are ready to order and Justin asks for more time to decide I don't say anything the waiter leaves and there is very uncomfortable silence between us and iam intensely looking at the menu acting like iam focused on it,after a few minutes the waiter returns with out drinks and I whisper a small thank you in return after he sets my drink down,Justin says nothing his eyes has not left my face and the waiter sensing the energy quickly leaves after telling us he will be back after a few minutes to take our order for food.
I finally build up the courage to look at Justin and I immediately regret it and wish I could be invisible because he has a not impressed or irritated look on his face and his jaw is clenched but I keep looking at him anyway and after a few seconds of our littlr stare competition he finally speaks.
"Giana what is wrong?" He asks looking outside the restaurant and I can see his trying to get his emotions under control.
Noth ..nothing is wrong" I answer after clearing my throat
"Never ever lie to me Giana I hate being lied to and I take that as betrayal so I won't ask× you again but I will give you a chance to tell me the truth" he says Without any emotion to his voice
Iam so intimidated by Justin right now I feel like peeing myself and I can't but feel the need to submit to his voice right now.
"Ok um.. iam worried and scared" I answer him back timidly
"What is making you worried and scared"
"Are you an alcoholic" I ask without looking at him
I hear a chuckle and another chuckle from Justin and I now look at him and he is looking at me with a amused face .
"Iam not an alcoholic kitten and you have nothing to worry or be scared about regarding my drinking,I can very well handle my alcohol and I know my limit with it but if drinking makes you unsafe and uncomfortable I will not drink infront of you or when with you" .
"But I'm glad you told me your thoughts or feelings and I would like you to be very open with me when it comes to your feelings and concerns" Justin says and moves his drink away from him and I feel bad now for assuming the worst of him and I feel the need to let him know where my concern is coming from.
"Iam so sorry for assuming the worst Justin and I really didn't mean it in a bad way, It's just that my father was an alcoholic and he did things he was not proud of the next day and one day that costed him his life and my twin brother life as well" I say
I feel a hand wiping my face and I didn't even realize I was now crying and Justin gives me a side hug and Iam now sobbing from the memories Justin is whispers sweet comforting words to me and I feel safe in his
arms and I cuddle more into him.
We are disturbed by the waiter clearing his throat trying to get our attention and Justin slowly lets me go after wiping my face with a napkin and giving me a kiss on my forehead he moves back to his seat takes my hand a gives it a little squeeze and glares at the waiter but I squeeze his hand back assuring him that iam fine.
After getting ourself together we order our food and Justin tells the waiter to take his whiskey away but I tell him no because I have faith in him and trust his words and not everyone is or will be like my father.