It was the first time I had been in Wyatt’s place, we usually came to mine. It was a flat but it was huge, a massive living area with a white sofa opposite a stupidly huge TV. At the side was a white armchair. It was circular and would easily fit us both in.
“Why is your chair so big?” I giggled, kicking my shoes off.
“It spins as well,” Wyatt chuckled, closing the door. I couldn’t help myself and fell into it, spinning around.
“This is amazing!” I cried, putting my head back. It stopped suddenly and I looked down to Wyatt’s face. I giggled, running my hand down his face.
“Let’s go,” he whispered, picking me up. He threw me over my shoulder and I giggled all the way to his bedroom.
“Wyatt!” I screamed as he threw me on his bed. I looked around his room, the walls were dark green and I was sitting on a leather bed. It was really tidy, not much else going on.
“How long have you lived here?” I asked as I watched Wyatt pull his top off.
“When I broke up with Caroline I moved out and got this place.” He nodded, looking shy.
“But that was your place no?” I asked him, my head to the side.
“It was, yes. It doesn’t matter.” He shook his head. I moved my head to the side, I felt it very much mattered. Somewhere he had lived in since he was sixteen was taken away from him. Like pretty much everything else.
“You were together when you opened your shop?” I asked. Wyatt dropped his shoulders, sighing.
“Baby why are we talking about her?” He asked me, his brow crossed.
“Sorry,” I whispered, looking down. I groaned standing up and walking towards his door. He grabbed my hand, pulling me back.
“Where are you going?” He asked me, looking at me up and down.
“I’m going to the toilet.” My voice was firm.
“Baby, don’t. Sorry and yes I did have the shop but not for long. Luz had to help me because a week before we opened I wasn’t well.” His eyes were heavy as he spoke, his voice quick.
“Okay, I was just curious. I can’t imagine she supported you through it and I just wondered that’s all.” I shrugged. This was constantly bugging me, I wanted to find this bitch and fucking kill her but I couldn’t.
“No, she didn’t.” His head was down.
“What’s not well?” I asked him, my hand on my hip, just realising what he said. Wyatt ran his hands down his face, groaning. “Okay, don’t worry. I’m sorry.” I smiled but I wasn’t completely there. “I’m just going to the toilet, I’ll be two seconds.” I went to walk out of his bedroom, realising I had no idea where his toilet was.
“Gabby,” I turned around to his voice, it sounded urgent and it panicked me.
“Yeah,” I grabbed his hand. His face was down. “It’s okay Wyatt, I’m sorry I brought it up. I’m not angry.” I moved his face up, kissing his lips gently.
“Okay,” he nodded.
“Baby,” I grabbed his waist, pushing him onto me. “Don’t, it’s okay. I promise you it’s okay.” I kissed his eyebrow after I spoke.
“I wasn’t well because I mentally wasn’t well at the time.” His eyes were on me.
“Okay, that’s fine,” I said softly, kissing his cheek. “Let me piss and then I can make you feel good.” I wrapped my arms around his neck. It was like a light switch had gone off in him and it started to panic me. “Wyatt,” I whispered and he looked up.
“Sorry, jesus. I’m being a prick,” he tried to chuckle.
“You’re not. You want to get some food and cuddle?” I asked him, keeping his head up by his chin. He nodded and I swore I saw a tear in his eyes. I grabbed his head and stared into his face. “Are you crying?” I asked him.
“No,” he whispered and then he chuckled as a tear went down his cheek. I wiped it for him quickly.
“Got caught out there babes.” I laughed and he smiled, wiping his eyes. “Talk to me, I can see you really want to talk to me. Or if not I can finally piss and we will chill.” I tried to make my words as comforting as possible, it wasn’t generally my greatest skill but I gave such a fuck about this guy and I just wanted him to be happy.
“Sorry, just the week before I opened the shop was a really bad week, so your question threw me.” His voice was barely a whisper.
“I understand, sorry. I hate that I say the wrong thing sometimes. I’m trying to remember that it affects you,” I said, pushing him closer to me.
“You don’t. It’s not your fault,” he whispered and I kissed his cheek. “Just the week before we got into an argument and she basically forced me to have sex with her because I wasn’t obviously in the mood I had already been in the hospital twice because of her and it was a mess,” he breathed out, looking down. My stomach fell out of my body, I stepped back, scanning his face.
“She raped you?” I whispered. He looked up at me and I wiped more of his tears from his cheeks.
“I suppose.” His voice was quiet. I wanted to ask so many fucking questions but me asking him questions never ended well.
“I don’t know what you mean by suppose.” My voice volume met his.
“I got a hard on so how can she rape me, it doesn’t make sense but,”
“No!” I interrupted him, grabbing his face. “That doesn’t mean shit. Don’t do that. Did she force you to have sex with her?” I asked, my heart beating out of my chest. He nodded. “Did you want to have sex with her?” I asked again and he shook his head.
“Did she know you didn’t want to have sex with her?” My eyes were burning his.
“Yeah, I told her to stop a million times but I was terrified that if I pushed her off I would hurt her and then I would be the bad guy.” His voice was shaky and my heart smashed into a million pieces for him. “I don’t want you to think I’m,” Wyatt started and I put my hand on his chest.
“I don’t think shit. You aren’t doing that. I’m proud of you.” I grabbed his t-shirt as I spoke. “I’m so proud of you. What you managed to do after this awful fucking thing happening to you is amazing. You have your own shop and you’re so talented. Wyatt,” I breathed out. “I don’t know how to make you feel better other than spending my whole fucking life making sure you know nothing like this will ever happen to you again.” Wyatt gave me a shy smile as he head came up. I was breathing heavy, my chest hurting. “That will never happen to you ever again. Do you hear me?” I asked, my voice raised.
“Yeah I know, because I have you.”
“Get in bed, let me go to the fucking toilet and then I’m coming back, okay?” He nodded before speaking.
“I need to take off your cling film,” he whispered. I let go of him, searching for his toilet. I shut the door behind me, my hand going over my mouth as I cried, my whole body shaking. I lent against the bathroom door, trying to silence my sobs. I needed to be the strong person here and I didn’t want Wyatt to see me cry, he didn’t need to feel any guiltier then he clearly did. I finally went to the toilet, my tears still coming. As I washed my hands I looked into the mirror. I didn’t look great and I splashed water over my face, taking my makeup off. I took a deep breath, going back into the bedroom. Wyatt was sitting in the bed, just his boxers on. I dropped my trousers, throwing off my t-shirt before I got in next to him. I put my hand on the back of his head, stroking him gently.
“Are you okay?” I asked, my head back. Wyatt looked at me, grabbing my leg and slowly taking off the cling film.
“Yeah, I’m okay. How’s your leg feeling?” He went into his drawer getting what looked like vaseline out.
“It’s a bit sore but fine. Are you sure you’re okay?” I was panicking for him. I flinched as he rubbed vaseline into my thigh, his eyes on it.
“Yeah,” he whispered.
“Wyatt,” I growled, moving his head up.
“I don’t want you to think I’m weak, that I let women beat me up or rape me.” He let out a breath and my tears I so desperately wanted to hide from him came loose, dropping onto my legs. I put my hand to my chest, it felt heavy and I don’t think I had ever been this upset. I generally travelled through life without any trauma or upset. I didn’t let most things bother me and to think he even thought for a moment I would think so poorly of him devastated me.
“Wyatt,” I whispered and he looked into my eyes and I saw all of his pain. “I don’t think that, I would never think that. You are a victim and someone did something awful to you. It’s not your fault. I think you’re amazing and I love you to death and I don’t want you to be sad anymore. You don’t deserve it.”
“You what sorry?” He chuckled.
“I want you to be happy.” I repeated, scanning his face. Wyatt laughed, moving closer to me, his hand on my cheek.
“You said I love you,” he whispered, a huge grin on his face. My stomach dropped, fuck. Did I say that? I racked my brain, my eyes moving around the room. Shit, I did say that. “I don’t believe I did,” I raised my eyebrow.
“You fucking did. It’s alright baby, I love you too.” He kissed my forehead.
“Erm,” I mumbled, feeling like a complete dick. “I’ve never said that to anyone,” I whispered.
“Wow, means even more to me then.” He smiled, kissing my lips gently. “I’m happy now, thank you.”
“I’m glad I could cheer you up,” I laughed. “I feel like a dick.” I confessed to him.
“Why?” He moved his head back.
“I hadn’t prepared myself,” I laughed lightly.
“Then prepare, I’m listening,” Wyatt said. I grinned at him, his whole face had changed and he looked a million times better. I moved my hair out my face, straightening up as I took a deep breath. I could say this right? I felt it, I didn’t know what love really was but I felt something for Wyatt I had never had with anybody before. As I said to Candy, I wished I could just have him next to me, every single fucking day. I looked into his eyes, he was laughing and I slapped his arm.
“Wow babe, a lot of preparation,” Wyatt said, still laughing. I rolled my eyes, my hand on his shoulder.
“I love you,” I whispered, feeling like my stomach was going to explode.
“I love you too,” he kissed my nose.
“Can we fuck now?” I asked him, Wyatt put his head back laughing.
“There’s my baby Gabby.” He grabbed my shoulders, pushing me down on the bed. Wyatt got in between my legs, his hands on my sides.
“Are you okay?” I asked him again. “I’m worried.” I chewed my bottom lip.
“I’m better, thank you for being the most amazing person I’ve ever met. I thought you were going to run away from me.” He kissed my neck after he spoke. I ran my hands down the back of his head.
“How could I do that? I love you.” I giggled in his ear.
“Wow,” Wyatt sat up and I rolled my eyes. “I got I love you three times? I should be asking if you’re okay.”
“Shut up!” I giggled, my hand over my face.
“Anyway,” he breathed out. “If I remember, I have a pussy to lick.” He smiled at me.
“Don’t forget my arsehole!” I giggled.
“You’re fucking filth baby.”