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Brandon left right after our fight and I had no intentions of considering the choices I made regarding our relationship, it was over. Despite it all, Brandon was still texting me about how much he was regretting it. He was asking for forgiveness and wanted to start over. I had to block his number in the end, knowing that he wouldn’t stop trying until I gave in. In the other hand I had limited encounters with James since that day in his office. He was mostly in his office and barely came down to breakfast or dinner.

He was either hiding or he had lost interest in me. I had given him such a blow only few men could handle. I had played with him and trapped him just to let him down. Walking all over his pride I had refused him bluntly but in that very moment I was pissed at all men and my anger towards Brandon was suddenly directed to James. Now that I had been living with my mother and James for the past 4 weeks, I could see that their relationship was more physical than emotional.

It was a partnership on paper and I was almost sure that my mother was seeing other men at the same time. I knew her so well, I knew that she never stayed with a man for longer than a few months. Getting married to James she might have thought it over strategically, she was that kind of a woman. A woman who calculated every step selfishly. Shaking those thoughts away I got dressed to go down to the basement gym.

Before going down to the gym, I stopped by the kitchen to fill my water bottle. My eyes caught James’ immediately. He was drinking his morning coffee while reading the newspaper, dressed in only pajamas pants. His eyes started roaming all over my body just before my mom entered the kitchen. She was glowing, like a woman who had just climaxed. She was in her sexy underwear and the robe left a little to the imagination. She walked over to James and settled her body in between his legs before she kissed him.

Good morning sweetheart... I hope we didn’t wake you up.” My mom said, turning to face me. She was giggling like a teenager and it annoyed me immensely to watch James places butterfly kisses on my mom neck while his eyes were eating me up. I knew his trail of thoughts at that very moment. However, I was curious to know if he was imagining my face when he was fucking my mom.

Don’t worry about me... I didn’t even hear you guys.” I said grabbing the bottle I had just filled with cold water and started walking towards the door.

Sweetheart... You never told me what happened with Brandon. He was here for a couple of hours and then he was gone. Did you guys fight?” She asked and James’ eyes were focused on my lips. It was like he had been waiting to hear about this for the past two weeks.

We broke up. He knocked up another girl so I decided to end it.” I said bluntly. Those two weeks had been difficult for me. Even though I felt relived to end my relationship with Brandon, it still hurt a lot. He had cheated on me and I went through all of it alone. Mom was never good at stuff like this so I didn’t want to talk with her about it.

Oh honey... don’t worry there are plenty of fish in the sea.” She said smiling. She was unbelievable. How could a mother miss the most important skill, empathy?

I know mom. You are a good example to follow...” I said looking into her eyes. She knew exactly what I was talking about.

Amy...” She said and even James could feel the tension between us. I didn’t even see the point of staying here anymore. I should probably book my ticket and go back to London. Turning around, I walked out of the kitchen without even glancing back at my mom. I heard footsteps behind me before I felt a strong grip on my elbow, pulling me to stop.

Amy...” James said and I froze instantly at the spot. There he was, the man that was haunting me every night in my dreams. I had rejected him because I felt that I couldn’t do this to my mom but would she even care if I fucked her husband? Looking into James’ eyes I gathered my courage to speak up.

What do you want?” I asked coldly, pulling my elbow free from his strong grip. The feeling of his warm skin against mine was tempting.

I... I don’t know how to...” James said, unable to form a proper sentence that made any sense.

Daddy is out of words? How ironic...” I said sarcastically. This desire I had in me for him would not win over me and my morals, I thought looking in to his eyes.

I just wanted to say sorry.” He said and his eyes were focused on my lips.

I shouldn’t have...” he said taking a long break.

What? You shouldn’t have seduced me? Tried fucking me?” I said angry and frustrated.

Jesus Amy... you wanted it as much as I did... why are you trying to appear like the victim here?” He said. His temper was clearly rising. He was angry.

We have to talk and sort things out.” He said calming himself down a little.

I will come to your room tonight.” He said and turned around and walked back in to the kitchen before I could protest. Was there anything to talk about? I walked down to the basement where the gym was and started to work out. My mind was traveling back to James’ words and my mom. My morals were crumbling in front of James and I hated how much he made me want to sin with him.

After spending around two hours exhausting my body in the gym I was ready to take a shower and relax in my room. Walking up the stairs I saw my mother in the living room, sitting and reading another book.

Sweetheart...” Mom said and I turned around to look at her. I wish I could have avoided her.

Can we talk?” She asked making me feel guilty about the way I treated her. I took a seat across and looked at her.

I am really sorry about you and Brandon but I can’t stop myself from thinking that there is something else. You don’t like living here with James and I?” She asked and I just looked at her without saying anything.

Look I know that I haven’t been the best mother out there but I am trying to accommodate all your needs. You know I am financially capable of giving you everything you want.” She said pissing me off immediately.

Yet you failed to give me one thing that you have given all the men in your life.” I said.

The only thing I needed was a mother, who was there when I needed her and loved me above all the men she dated but yet again, here we are. Me, who is trying to run away from you and you, who thinks that everything can be fixed with money.” I continued letting out the frustrations I had kept in my heart for so long. I had always been second to all the men in her life and she was still treating me like a second.

Amy...” She said trying to make up excuses.

No! I don’t want to hear your excuses mother. How long will you even be married to James? You don’t even love him. I can see that. You just desire him like you have desired your previous boyfriends.” I said looking for answers.

Our relationship is a practical arrangement for both me and James, you don’t have to worry about that.” She said closing me off once more.

A practical arrangement?” I asked, laughing.

Amy... It is none of your business. Don’t worry about my private life.” She said, still being selfish.

Is it really that difficult to see that your private life is affecting me as well. I moved continents to get away from this circus that you have created for yourself. I don’t even have any friends left in LA since you have slept with the dad of every single friend I have had.” I said.

Honey...” Mom said trying to cool me down.

Mom... give me time to cool down.” I said standing up from my seat. I headed upstairs to my room and turned on the hot water. I took a long shower thinking about the conversation I just had with both James and my mom. I was a mess... a complicated mess. After I stepped out of the shower I got dressed in comfortable clothes.

I rested on my bed watching some Netflix and before I knew it I had passed out. I woke up with a knock on my door and I didn’t even pay attention to the opening and closing of the door. I felt a warm hand on my face brushing away the hair from my face and when I came back to my senses I saw James in front of me, dangerously close. My heart started hammering against my chest making me want him.

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