Look Before You Leap

27 No Growth Without Change


The three of us sprinted down the hallway towards the elevators. I didn't look back but I could only assume Bill, or whatever the fuck he had become, was chasing us. Sookie screamed as she tripped and fell into a puddle of vampire goo, Eric and I grabbed either of her arms and lifted her forwards into the waiting elevator. I slammed my finger into button for the ground floor and sighed in relief as the elevator began its ascent. Then suddenly it came to a screeching halt and the light blinked out. "Fuck," I mumbled. Sookie held out her hand and her light came on.

"Can we get out through the top?" Sookie asked.

Eric pulled down part of the lights and started beating on the metal above it. Finally he broke through and made a hole big enough for us to escape. "Lily, I'll push you up first and then you can help pull Sookie up." I nodded and got into position for him to hoist me up into the elevator shaft. He lifted me up and I grabbed the edges and pulled myself out of the elevator. I knelt down by the hole and grabbed Sookie's hands and yanked her up after me. She landed with considerably less grace than I had and stumbled into one of the walls. I turned back to the hole and pulled Eric up. There was an emergency evacuation ladder and I heard Sookie sigh in relief that she wouldn't have to scale the wall.

Sookie started to climb the ladder. Eric rolled his eyes before grabbing us both around the waists and flying us up to the top. "Turn so I can get the door open," I told him and he turned us around. Sookie was clutching onto his arm for dear life and trying not to look down. I dug my fingers between the doors and pushed them aside and we excited.

"What now?" Sookie asked.

"We get the car and find the others," I told her. We hadn't parked too far away from the building so I was a bit nervous to see if our car had already caught fire. Thankfully it was fine, saving us the trouble of hot wiring a car. I hopped into the passenger seat next to Eric, forcing Sookie into the back. We drove around to the front of the building and I looked for our friends. "Is that them, through the smoke?" I asked pointing towards some blobs that appeared to be moving. Eric nodded and drove towards them.

They all got into the car and Jessica leaned into the front towards me. "What about Bill?" I shook my head and she sank back into her seat. I looked out the window though I could feel Eric staring at me.

I noticed Bill coming through the fire. "Look," I said.

"Is that Bill?" Jessica asked.

"Not anymore," Sookie answered as I shook my head.

"Get us the fuck out of here!" Pam yelled at Eric from the back. He turned the SUV around and sped away. I could hear the others arguing in the car but I tuned them out. I didn't want to talk about Bill, but I knew it was stupid to think I could avoid the subject forever. Eventually I would have to confront the fact that my only remaining blood relative, other than Rachel, had turned into an insane super monster. I sighed; I'd have to explain it to Rachel somehow.

The radio changed from music to the news. "The governor has called an urgent press conference; we take you to Baton Rouge for the latest action," a newscaster said over the radio. We all listened as the governor talked about the how Louisiana had welcomed vampires but now it was unsafe to have vampires living among the humans.

"I am instituting a vampire curfew. All vampires must stay underground or indoors at night and furthermore I am closing down all vampire run businesses and institutions," the governor said.

"Can they do that?" I asked Eric.

"Apparently they can," Sookie said.

"It's about damn time someone did something about y'all," Jason said hitting my seat.

"Shut up, Jason," Sookie, Tara and I snapped.

"We did this," Nora said leaning between me and Eric. "We bombed the TruBlood factories, we started this war."

"We were not part of that. That was all you and your stupid fucking Vampire Authority," I said.

"Because god forbid you take responsibility for anything you did," she said.

"What I did?" I asked incredulously. "I was a victim in all this shit. In case you forgot I'm a fucking vampire-faerie hybrid thing because of you!"

Pam mumbled something I couldn't hear and Nora turned to her. "Would you shut up about your shit when the world is about to end?"

"I don't know about the world, but I'm about to end your face," Pam said.

"I would say I would help burry the body, but thankfully there won't be one," I said. Eric turned the car sharply and we stopped in an abandoned parking lot.

"Nora, Lily, out now," Eric said. I got out and walked around the front of the car and down the hill, following Nora. After he talked to Pam, Eric followed us. "We need to talk about Bill." He looked us, Nora and I were standing a good fifteen feet away from each other, and groaned. "I thought you two got past this."

"I thought we had," Nora and I both said at the same time.

"I'm sorry for getting upset with you, I know this change has been difficult for you," Nora said.

"Apology accepted," I said. I didn't bother apologizing because in my opinion I hadn't done anything wrong and Nora didn't say anything about it. "Now about Bill?" I said giving the conversation back to Eric.

"Is there anything in the Vampire Bible to explain this?" Eric asked Nora.

"If there was something in there about a resurrection I would know about it. I don't know what's happened to Bill. All it took for me to turn my back on my family and everything I knew was one drop and he drank the whole fucking bottle." She shook her head and took a pause. "If Lilith is walking this Earth in any form we have to destroy her."

"Destroy her?" Jessica repeated walking towards us. "You mean you want to kill Bill." She ran off before anyone could say anything.

"I think you should talk to the brother," Nora told me.

"Jason? Why would I need to talk to Jason?" I asked.

"You know him better than I do, he'll probably be more likely to tell you know what he knows."

"I don't think Jason knows much. Trust me; I went out with him a few times before I realized he had the IQ of a wooden chair."

"If he's so stupid then how does he know about Warlow?" She asked.

"Who's Warlow?" Eric and I asked at the same time. Nora rolled her eyes and walked in between us towards Jason.

I heard a phone ring and Eric pulled my phone out of his pocket. "I found this in the security office. I figured you might want it back."

Caller ID said Rachel was calling and I flipped it open. "Rachel, oh my god!"

"Lily? You aren't dead!" She squealed.

"That depends on your definition of dead," I said.

There was a long pause before she spoke. "You don't mean you're a vampire, do you?"

"To be honest, I don't know what I am. But I'm not human."

"Oh my god," she said quietly. "Where are you?"

"With Eric, we're on our way back to Bon Temps." I glanced to where he'd been standing but he'd joined Nora and the others on the dock.

"Is he your maker?" She asked.

"Yeah," I said.

I heard a release a relieved breath. "Good. Where's Bill?" When I didn't answer right away she panicked. "He isn't dead is he? Oh my god, if he's dead-"

"He's not dead," I assured her. "But we don't know what's happened to him. There's so much you missed, I don't know how to explain it all to you over the phone."

"I might be coming back to Bon Temps soon," she said. "You can tell me then."

"What about Alcide?" I asked.

"He's changed too, everyone is changing." I heard her shuffling the phone and then I could hear her talking to someone else. "Are you feeling better?" The other person answered but I couldn't understand them. Then Rachel was back on the line, "I need to go. I promise we'll catch up soon."

"Alright, Rach, love you."

"Love you too, Lil." I hung up and walked over to Eric and the others.

"Where's Jason?" I asked.

"He's acting real weird," Jessica said. Before I could respond Jess gasped and turned to walk in the other direction.

"What's going on?" I asked.

"Bill's summoning me," she said. She kept walking until Eric stepped in front of her and stopped her. She started shaking and then vomited blood on Eric before falling to the ground.

"Please tell me this isn't normal because I do not want that to look forward to in my future," I said.

"It was nice knowing you," Pam said to Jessica. "I hope you agree that this isn't any of our fucking business?" She asked Eric.

"Of course this is our business," Nora said. "Lilith could destroy everything."

"We have to take her to him now," Sookie said. She helped Jess up and to the car. Eric ordered Pam to take Tara back to Fangtasia and then grabbed me for flying off with Nora.


I put down the phone and looked at Rikki. "Are you sure you're ok?" I asked.

"I just told you, I'm fine. I want to go see what's going on. Don't pretend like you aren't curious too," she said.

"You're right; of course I want to know. Come on let's go." We both got out of the car and walked through the trees towards the clearing. It didn't take us long to find them, they weren't exactly quiet and they had several large fires. When we got through the trees we could see wolves ripping apart a body that I assumed belonged to JD. One of the wolves carried an arm to Alcide who was standing with his dad on the far side of the clearing. "Please tell me he isn't going to eat that."

"That's how a wolf becomes packmaster," Rikki explained.

"But does he have to do it while he's human?" I asked. She didn't say anything but gave me a look that said I wouldn't ever be able to understand her and Alcide's kind. I cringed as Alcide sunk his teeth into JD's flesh.

"The vamp blood will wear off," Martha said coming up next to me. "Power is a more dangerous drug, eats away at a man's decency."

"I don't understand why women are attracted to power," I said. "I've seen what it can do to people. Power makes people less human than any supernatural gift ever could."

Some were bitch shifted back in front of him. I dug my nails into the palm of my hand waiting to see what he would do. Rikki gave me a light push forwards and I walked up next to him and wrapped my arm around his. When the girl didn't leave I reached up and grabbed his face and kissed him. Alcide barely looked at me before shifting and running off with the other wolves.

Rikki walked up next to me and put her hand on my arm. "He loves you, you know that."

"Yeah, well he's sure done a good job of forgetting it right now."


We landed on Bill's second floor porch. Almost as soon as my feet hit the ground they were knocked out from under me by Bill throwing Nora across the ground and pinning Eric to the support beam. I fell to the ground next to them and backed away from Bill quickly. Bill didn't look insane anymore, no head to toe blood bath, no creepy high pitched squawking, it was just Bill in his signature Henley and black jeans. The only thing wrong with the picture in front of me was that he was choking Eric. I jumped up just as Sookie ran forwards and staked him. I screamed and waited to be drenched in a goo bath but it didn't happen. "Oh my god, you aren't dead."

He pulled the stake out of his chest slowly. "Now can we talk?" He asked. Eric pushed me behind him protectively but I wiggled away from him and stepped closer to Bill. "I wanted you all to see me, I am no monster," Bill said. "I do not wish harm on any of you."

"What are you?" I asked.

He stepped towards me and reached towards my face but I flinched away. "I am Bill Compton. I am still your family. But clearly I am something more."

"If you really mean us no harm you will leave Jessica, and Lily and all of us alone. You'll leave Bon Temps tonight and never come back," Sookie said.

"No," Jess said pushing forwards. "He's staying and so am I." Sookie grabbed Jess's arm but she shook her off. "He's my maker, you will never understand." She turned to me. "You do and you wouldn't want Bill to leave, I know you wouldn't. Family is too important to you; Rachel would feel the same way."

"We should leave," I told Eric.

"What about Bill?" Eric asked.

"Jess and Bill stay, like she said." I grabbed Eric's arm and pulled him towards the door. Sookie and Nora followed us. I met Bill's eyes over my shoulder and then turned back towards the door quickly. I didn't know what Bill was and I didn't think I could handle it right now, so I was putting that in a box to file away later when I had less shit on my plate. I didn't want to lose someone so important to me but I also needed to deal with myself first.


"If you don't follow him that bitch Danielle is going to," Rikki said.

"I don't know where he went," I said.

"So you're giving up just like that? I thought you loved him? People fight when they love someone," she said. "Follow me." She shifted and looked up at me to see if I was ready to go. I nodded and she took off through the woods making me have to run pretty fast to keep up, thankfully faeries had a bit of extra endurance. Finally I heard something and Rikki seemed to nod at me. I walked forwards and saw the girl from earlier kissing Alcide. I stepped through the bushes and the noise caused them to look up.

"Rachel, I'm sorry," Alcide said.

"It was my fault, I started it," Danielle said. She didn't make a move to step away from him. I wasn't in the mood to deal with her and I reached out with my mind and grabbed the thread that was her emotions and twisted it hard. She fell screaming just like JD had. I held it until I was standing right in front of Alcide. I tangled my fingers in his hair and kissed him hard. That was enough of a distraction to make me lose my hold on Danielle and I could hear her whimpering.

"I don't know how far I can take that, but I'd suggest staying away from him or we might get to find out," I told her. She nodded before shifting and running away.

Alcide smirked. "That wasn't very nice."

"All's fair in love and war," I whispered before kissing him again.


Eric and I walked Sookie back to her house across the cemetery. "I can give you money to start a new life," Eric told her.

"What's the point? Bill will find me wherever I go," she said.

"There are serious pros and cons to magical GPS blood," I said and Sookie grunted in agreement.

"You staked Bill to save me tonight," Eric said.

She nodded. "Bill isn't the only one who's changed."

"We all have," I finished. "My life is so wildly different from how it was a few years ago. It almost feels like it was yesterday but at the same time it feels like it's been years and years since Rachel and I were living in a quaint little Colorado suburb with mountains and snow, that life was so normal. I never would have expected any of this. Rachel can argue that her life was destined for adventure but really that just meant taking the black diamond tree trails at Buttermilk, she didn't predict this either and she was psychic."

We got up to the steps and Eric pulled out his key. "I got it."

"Do you want it back?" She asked when Eric had gone up to the door. "Normal I mean."

"Sometimes I think I do, but then I remember that yeah this life is hard but it's so worth it. Besides Rachel and our mom I've never been close with anyone, and then I get here and find Bill and you and Eric and Jess. Hell I even love Tara, Pam and your brother even if they're pretty hard to deal with sometimes. None of this is easy but it's the realest thing I've ever felt, as crazy as that sounds."

She was quiet for a moment but then she nodded. We went inside and Eric asked for a pen and paper. "I'm giving you your house back; the deed will be in the mail in the morning." It seemed like ages ago that Eric had bought Sookie's house, so much had happened in such a short amount of time.

"Eric, I want to change my life, I want to be normal again. That's why I'm going to rescind your invitation to my house," Sookie said. She looked at me and smiled. "I want it back, my old life. I know where you're coming from but I want normal. Lily, I rescind your invitation to my house." I didn't say anything as I was slowly pushed out the door next to Eric.

"Wow," I said quietly. I sniffed and realized I had started crying. Sookie and I had been close despite all the times I had gotten pissed at her; she was always there for me no matter what. Now she was kicking me out of her life just like Eric. I reached up and wiped at my face, my fingers came away bloody and I groaned. "Out of all the vamp things to inherit I had to get damn bloody tears."

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