Look Before You Leap

6 If You Love Me Then Why Are You Dying?


Sookie wanted us to leave so she could talk to Bill. After a few minutes Bill came out with blood tears running down his face. Lily and I got up and he hugged us both. "I'm glad you're alright," Lily told him.

"I'll see you two when you get home," he said.

"Ok," I said.

"It would probably be best if you moved in with Sookie, for her benefit and yours."

"Are you kicking us out?" Lily asked surprised.

"No, it would just be better if you lived with her."

"Fine," I said, a bit annoyed. "We'll come by and get our things tomorrow."


Alcide drove Sookie, Lily and I back to Bon Temps. "I'm just going to go to sleep, I'm exhausted," Lily said.

Sookie looked at me and Alcide. "Yeah I'm pretty tired too. I'll see you in the morning Rach."

We went into the living room and sat down. "I hope Sookie is ok," I said.

"I think she's stronger than she looks," Alcide said.

"No kidding."

"What happened with you, Lily and Sookie at the hospital?"

"I don't know, it didn't really make any sense," I told him. "If you need to get back to Jackson you can go."

"I'm not leaving the three of you alone right now."

"Well Lily and I kinda have all the rooms filled up right now."

"That's ok. I can sleep on the couch." He looked at me. "Are you ok? Everyone is worried about Sookie, but she isn't the only one that went through a lot."

"I'm fine."

"Are you sure?" He asked. I shook my head. "Come here." I lay down on the couch with him and he held me until I fell asleep just like that first night in Jackson.


The next morning Alcide got a call from Janice. Debbie's pack had burned down Janice's hair salon. "Sorry," I said.

"It's not your fault, Debbie has always been crazy. I need to get back to Jackson."

"Yeah, I understand."

"You could come with me," he said hopefully.

"I'd love to, but I can't leave Sookie and Lily."

"What about Russell?" He asked.

"I can't go on the run. Plus, that's all the more reason can't leave them."

"I guess I can't tell you what's best for you."

"If I knew what was best for me, I would've fallen in love with someone like you. I don't know how to do what's best, but I do know what's right."

"I'll miss you, Rachel."

I hugged him. "You'll see me again," I promised.

"I hope so."


Later that afternoon I had my shift at Merlotte's. When I came home Sookie and Lily were talking to some girl in her kitchen. "Hey," I said when I walked in.

"Oh, Rachel you're home. This is my cousin Hadley."

"Nice to meet you," I said.

"I didn't come to visit. I've got a message from Eric Northman. He says Russell is coming for you, don't trust Bill. I've got to go."

"Go where? Hadley, wait!" Sookie jumped up.

"You should get out of here! They're gonna kill you, or worse." She ran out the door and drove away.

"We need to get ready. If they're coming we need to be ready to fight," Lily said.


"If Debbie is here tonight, I call dibs." I said. Sookie and I went upstairs; Lily was with Bill and Jessica downstairs. That's when we heard the door burst open. There were footsteps on the stairs, followed by banging on the door. Then Debbie kicked it open. "I don't want to kill you," I said. "Actually that's a lie; Alcide would be so much better off if you weren't around. But Alcide does still love you, for whatever reason, so I'll try not to."

"Bitch, do not talk to me about love. It's not like you know anything about it." She grabbed my gun and I pulled back and it ended up falling to the ground. Sookie hit Debbie and Debbie hit her back. I shoved Debbie into the door and she threw me to the ground. Sookie jumped on her and Debbie grabbed my arm pulling me with them. I couldn't see who I was clawing and really hoped it was Debbie's face. I managed to roll away and grab the gun. Sookie grabbed a pair of scissors and sliced Debbie's cheek. I pointed the gun at Debbie. She stood up.

"Get the fuck out of our house, bitch," I said.

"Fuck you."

I shot the wall behind her. "Next time that'll be you," I said. She snarled it was a really creepy sight with that gash across her cheek. She turned around a dove out the window. "Damn, I really hoped she would stay so would have had an excuse to shoot her in the face." Bill came up stairs. "I'll leave the two of you alone," I said. As I was going down the hall I saw a flash of Eric walking into Fangtasia.

I walked down stairs and saw Lily. "Where are you off to?" She asked.

"Fangtasia, I just got a flash. Eric is back, and the two of us have a lot of talking to do."

"Oh. Rach, I don't want you to think I'm calling you a slut but I'm going to ask anyway, did you sleep with Alcide?"

"Yeah, I did. And I already told Eric, so there's no need to lecture me. That's one of the things he and I need to talk about."

"Oh alright. Well...see you in the morning."


When I got to Fangtasia everything was closed up. I used my key and went through the staff entrance in the back. I could hear people talking in the main room and stopped. I pushed the door open a bit and listened. I could hear that vampire that's always on TV, Nan Flannigan, talking to Eric. I couldn't hear what either of them was saying from this far away. Then I heard Ginger scream. I pushed the door open and stepped into the room.

Pam was in front of me in a second. "Now is not really the time Rachel," she said.

"I need to talk to Eric," I said.

"Like I said, now is not really the time."

"Is that the girlfriend? Might as well let her in, as long as she isn't going to start screaming too," Nan said.

Pam sighed and stepped aside. I ran over to Eric. "Are you alright?" I asked.

"I'm fine, go over there with Pam." He wouldn't look at me so I turned and walked towards Pam.

"What'd you do to piss him off?" Pam asked.

I leaned against the bar next to her."I fucked a werewolf."

She laughed. "That's just peachy."

"What's with Eric?" I asked.

"He killed Talbot. And the Magister is dead too, he didn't do that one," Pam said.

"He killed Russell Edgington's boy toy? Nice, one family for another. Now they're even." Pam was looking at me funny. "What? I know things." I hopped up into one of the barstools to listen to Eric talk to the Authority. I listened as he talked about Russell and his werewolves through the ages. And then he told them about his family. How Russell killed them all. "I knew it," I whispered.

"Bring in a couple of extra coffins," Nan told her people. "You're on lock down until the Authority makes their decisions." She left without another look at any of us.

"Looks like we have plenty of time to talk," Eric said looking at me.

"She can't mean I'm on lockdown too," I said.

"No, but this might be the last time you get to talk to me."

"She's not going to kill you," I said.

"She might. I'm sorry about everything in Jackson. I really was trying to protect you but I had to get my revenge, you understand."

"Of course I do. I just wish you'd told me. And I'm sorry about the werewolf."

"I know. I'm not mad at you."

"Good. Do you really think they'll kill you?" I asked.

"I don't know."


I was at Sookie's pacing around unsure what to do with myself when I saw Sookie on the couch flipping through an album. "What are you looking at?" I asked.

"Just an old family photo album." I walked in the room and sat down with her. There were a lot of old newspaper clippings about the Stackhouse family. A few were about her Grandfather saying he had a sixth sense, like us. Then Sook's phone rang. "Hello?" She answered. "Well they came, they went and I'm still alive….Where are you?" After she hung up she turned to me. "Want to go to the aquarium?"


An hour later we were walking into the Munroe Aquarium. I followed Sookie in. We saw Hadley with a little kid. "Oh my god," Sookie said.

Hadley walked towards us. "I took him out of daycare. I didn't tell his dad."

"You're going to lose him if you don't take him back!" Sookie said.

"I haven't seen him in over a year!" Hadley said.

"Where've you been?"

"I got involved with a vampire, the vampire queen of Louisiana, Sophie-Ann"

"You've got to be kidding me," I said.

"Hunter, come meet your aunt Sookie," Hadley called. "I need to know if he's like you."

Who are these people? Where's my daddy. He was thinking.

"Come sit with us for a second," Sookie said.

Which fish is your favorite? I stared at me.

It's ok. Sookie said. No one knows but us.

I like the blue one. He said.

Me too. I said. I looked over at Hadley and she ran over and grabbed Hunter and pulled him away. "That poor little boy," I said.


I had been drifting in and out of sleep all day. Every time I'd woken up enough to look around Eric had still been awake. "You need to sleep." I told him at one point.

"I'm fine."

"You've got the bleeds," I pointed out.

"I'm fine."

"I guess it's almost sunset?"


"Pam will be waking up soon. She'll get on to you for not sleeping," I walked over to his desk.

"I'm fine."

I rolled my eyes. "Whatever."

Pam's coffin opened and saw him sitting at his desk. "Did he sleep at all?" She asked me.

"No," I said.

"I'm fine," he said for what seemed like the twentieth time.

"Stop saying that before I throw something at you," I said.

"Fine." I rolled my eyes. "Whatever the Authority decides I don't want you taking any of the blame," Eric told Pam. "And I don't want you to tell them anything you know about Russell's werewolves, Rachel."

"But what if it helps you stay alive?"

"I am not letting you drag yourself into this," he said.

"I've been with you 100 years and you never told me about your family," Pam said.

"You didn't know?" I asked surprised.

"She didn't need to. Neither did you," Eric said.

"You didn't need to go through all that alone," Pam said.

"I was the only survivor, the burden was mine alone."

"It can't be over this quickly," I said.

"Everything ends."

"Vampires are supposed to live forever."

"Even immortals must end," he said. He turned to Pam, "If I die, you must make another vampire." He looked at me and so did Pam. Me and Pam both started crying. I tried to imagine eternity without Eric, I didn't want to. "They're here," Eric said. "Rachel you stay in here."

I nodded at sat down again. I wiped my eyes and tried to calm down. They were only gone for a few minutes. "What did she say?" I asked when they came back in.

"They're pretending like none of this ever happened. I'm supposed to take care of Russell off the radar." Eric said.

"They aren't going to kill you! That's great!" I said.

"But Russell might," Eric said.


I was at Jason'swith Sookie when Bill knocked on the door. "Where have you been?" Sookie asked after inviting him in.

"It felt like I was only gone a few minutes…"

"What are you talking about?" I asked him.

"Lily, I know what you are."

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