Get Free Copy

100 free copies left

This novel is limited to 100 free copies due to its part in Inkitt’s Novel Contest.

Free copy left
You can read our best books
AG Stewart would love your feedback! Got a few minutes to write a review?
Write a Review

That's Not Very Punny, Sirius

By AG Stewart


That's Not Very Punny, Sirius

Harry, Remus, and Sirius were gathered around the table in the kitchen of twelve Grimmauld Place. The Weasleys, who were also spending their summer at Grimmauld Place were all in various other places, leaving Sirius and Remus to recall older times with Harry.

"I was very offended when James and Lily decided to name you after Moony rather than me. I'm your godfather, after all. Remus is not!" Sirius said.

Harry glanced over at Remus, who was at the counter, making tea for them. He didn't seem to hear Sirius' comment.

"But, I'm not named after Remus, am I?" Harry asked, confused.

"Oh, but you are. See, Moony is hairy, especially when it's that time of the month. Then, James goes and names you Harry. That's not very Sirius at all!"

Harry stared at him, incredulously.

"Hairy Harry. Get it?" Sirius explained.

Harry continued staring, a little perturbed.

"Just ignore him, Harry," Remus said, setting a cup of tea in front of the boy. "He's just in one of his moods."

"Moods?" Sirius repeated, glaring at his friend. "I am not Moody, Remus. That would be Mad-Eye."

"And then, she yells at James, calling him an 'arrogant toe rag!', one of her favorite insults for him. He almost deserved it this time, though. He did turn her skin blue," Sirius laughed, recalling the memory.

Harry grinned. Ron and Hermione, sitting on either side of Harry, laughed softly as well.

"Blue though? Surely you can't be serious," Hermione started.

Sirius cut her off, nodding seriously, "Oh but I am Sirius, and stop calling me Shirley!"

A knocking on the front door distracted Sirius, Remus, and Harry as they walked down the stairs toward the kitchen.

"That's probably Dora," Remus remarked speeding up slightly to get to the door first.

"Hey Remus, why don't you go get the Dora?" Sirius called out after him, chortling.

Remus ignored him and Harry rolled his eyes.

Harry and Ron listened intently at the end of a pair of Extendable Ears that were wedged under the room behind which the Order meeting was going on.

"Why would he be doing that though?" an unfamiliar voice asked.

"Well, he's a very nosey sort of fellow,"

"Actually, he's not," Sirius' voice came.

"Excuse me?"

"He can't be nosey. He hasn't got a nose!"

Ron, Hermione, and Harry were holed up in Harry and Ron's room, discussing the latest events they had managed to overhear from the Order meeting.

They stopped abruptly as the door slammed open and Sirius was revealed in the doorway. He grinned and asked, "Why so Sirius?"

Christmas had settled over Grimmauld Place, and Hermione sat with her two friends in the living room. Sirius and Remus were with them, waiting for Christmas dinner to be finished.

"Mum and Dad were talking about visiting Rome next summer," Hermione said.

"Oh yes, I went there not too long ago," Remus stated, turning to Hermione.

"Searching for your brother, Remus?" Sirius asked innocently.

"Very funny, Sirius," Remus replied dryly, then turned back to Hermione.

Write a Review Did you enjoy my story? Please let me know what you think by leaving a review! Thanks, AG Stewart
Continue Reading
Further Recommendations

ianwatson: The comedy is original and genuinely funny, I have laughed out loud many times reading this book. But the story and the plot are also really engaging. The opening two or three chapters seem quite character-dense but they all soon come to life and there is no padding, filling or wasted time readin...

Sinhala-Kella (aka Scandal Mania): Hey Fazio, I LOVED your story! The bus - I don't watch Grey's but that was vividly shocking! And the last paragraph where you said April was engaged to one man but rushed in to save another. It was sooo cute the way Jackson won April back - there were so many lovely bits - 'Shonda' (LOL!).You nee...

Alex Rushmer: Although I don't know the story of the Phantom of the Opera, I really enjoyed this story. The writing was very evocative, and it really put a picture of time and setting in my mind. The voice of the story really added to the character development. The idea of the time travelling -- or whatever re...

HeavenAriel: I love this story so much that I can literally feel myself playing the character, I'm honestly hooked on this story that is also on Quotev on the author's account! I love seeing updates and improvements its an amazing story definitely deserves 1st place.

Julia Summers PA: Reading this now. It's fun, hilariously fabulous yet taste of what you desire in a unusual read. I will post an actual review when I am finished. But so far loving the flow and the story seems to keep me drawn

lunavirgo: This story has fresh ideas, even the theme of cross-dressing have been used before. But Sid is a complicated character, independent, but utterly confused about her feminine charm. There is one mistake that I might point out, in the chapter 15 where Author suddenly starts conversation between Sid ...

This story wasn't for you ?
Look at our most viral stories!

FreakyPoet: "you made me laugh, made me cry, both are hard to do. I spent most of the night reading your story, captivated. This is why you get full stars from me. Thanks for the great story!"

The Cyneweard

Sara Joy Bailey: "Full of depth and life. The plot was thrilling. The author's style flows naturally and the reader can easily slip into the pages of the story. Very well done."

This story wasn't for you ?
Look at our most viral story!

Ro-Ange Olson: "Loved it and couldn't put it down. I really hope there is a sequel. Well written and the plot really moves forward."