Get Free Copy

100 free copies left

This novel is limited to 100 free copies due to its part in Inkitt’s Novel Contest.

0
Free copy left
You can read our best books
AG Stewart would love your feedback! Got a few minutes to write a review?
Write a Review

That's Not Very Punny, Sirius

By AG Stewart

Humor

That's Not Very Punny, Sirius

Harry, Remus, and Sirius were gathered around the table in the kitchen of twelve Grimmauld Place. The Weasleys, who were also spending their summer at Grimmauld Place were all in various other places, leaving Sirius and Remus to recall older times with Harry.

"I was very offended when James and Lily decided to name you after Moony rather than me. I'm your godfather, after all. Remus is not!" Sirius said.

Harry glanced over at Remus, who was at the counter, making tea for them. He didn't seem to hear Sirius' comment.

"But, I'm not named after Remus, am I?" Harry asked, confused.

"Oh, but you are. See, Moony is hairy, especially when it's that time of the month. Then, James goes and names you Harry. That's not very Sirius at all!"

Harry stared at him, incredulously.

"Hairy Harry. Get it?" Sirius explained.

Harry continued staring, a little perturbed.

"Just ignore him, Harry," Remus said, setting a cup of tea in front of the boy. "He's just in one of his moods."

"Moods?" Sirius repeated, glaring at his friend. "I am not Moody, Remus. That would be Mad-Eye."


"And then, she yells at James, calling him an 'arrogant toe rag!', one of her favorite insults for him. He almost deserved it this time, though. He did turn her skin blue," Sirius laughed, recalling the memory.

Harry grinned. Ron and Hermione, sitting on either side of Harry, laughed softly as well.

"Blue though? Surely you can't be serious," Hermione started.

Sirius cut her off, nodding seriously, "Oh but I am Sirius, and stop calling me Shirley!"


A knocking on the front door distracted Sirius, Remus, and Harry as they walked down the stairs toward the kitchen.

"That's probably Dora," Remus remarked speeding up slightly to get to the door first.

"Hey Remus, why don't you go get the Dora?" Sirius called out after him, chortling.

Remus ignored him and Harry rolled his eyes.


Harry and Ron listened intently at the end of a pair of Extendable Ears that were wedged under the room behind which the Order meeting was going on.

"Why would he be doing that though?" an unfamiliar voice asked.

"Well, he's a very nosey sort of fellow,"

"Actually, he's not," Sirius' voice came.

"Excuse me?"

"He can't be nosey. He hasn't got a nose!"


Ron, Hermione, and Harry were holed up in Harry and Ron's room, discussing the latest events they had managed to overhear from the Order meeting.

They stopped abruptly as the door slammed open and Sirius was revealed in the doorway. He grinned and asked, "Why so Sirius?"


Christmas had settled over Grimmauld Place, and Hermione sat with her two friends in the living room. Sirius and Remus were with them, waiting for Christmas dinner to be finished.

"Mum and Dad were talking about visiting Rome next summer," Hermione said.

"Oh yes, I went there not too long ago," Remus stated, turning to Hermione.

"Searching for your brother, Remus?" Sirius asked innocently.

"Very funny, Sirius," Remus replied dryly, then turned back to Hermione.

Write a Review Did you enjoy my story? Please let me know what you think by leaving a review! Thanks, AG Stewart
Continue Reading
Further Recommendations

Jasmine Chow: As I read this story, I was reminded some what of Terry Pratchett, especially some descriptions of politics and economics. The sci-fic setting is quite intriguing. Writing style is quite lovely and grew on me slowly. I was also slightly reminded of Mark Twain, especially his book A Connecticut Ya...

Bloodied_Demon_: I start reading this book over a year ago and i am in love! I followed this author from Wattpad to Radish and now here. she is an amazing writer that makes you feel like you are right there in the book! The people in the book feels so real. I hope and pray that this book becomes a New York best s...

CurlyRed: I read this entire book in just under 4 hours I COULD NOT PUT IT DOWN! i found myself emotionally attached to the characters and making personal connections that i had never experienced before while reading a book! I was constantly wanting to read more, every chapter left me on a cliff hanger tha...

AASTHA SHARMA: really...one of the best novel i've ever read...a very touching story....really loved it...thanks for writing such a masterpeice...the struggle of the narrator but still remaining satisfied is the thing that i liked the most...another nice thing is the concept of talking with god...in short i wou...

Mona Matthews: I went to high school a while back and was able to revisit it in this book. The emotions, conflicts, and triumphs kept me turning the pages. Who is cool in high school? And what makes them cool? Why do we care? This book blends the turmoils of high school and the turmoils of life with perfect bal...

Alex Rushmer: I just want to say that the writing in this is amazing! I read the first couple chapters and was absolutely drawn in by it, The way you use first person in this story is extremely engaging and does wonders with your character development. I immediately had a picture of the characters and plotline...

AVK: I'm not much for romance, but the story was funny. The Canadian jokes were on spot. Very much enjoyed Doctor Who references, and other geeky jokes.

abygtan: Aside from the fact the book mentioned my bae percy this book is a whats-not-to-like kind of book I love the sass in this and the uniqueness it's just the type of book that keeps you crawling for more seriously I love this book go and check it out

Mheka Saleh: Hey! I finished at chapter 37 and just wanna know if that's the end, anyways, i like ur story.. Hope this isn't the end yet. Cos WE WANT MORE!!! Please please please!! Continue it cos im so excited. Hopefully this isn't the END gosh. I will be so mad! Xoxoo!!

More Recommendations

rudyoxborough46: So, I’m a little unsure about the kind of genre that this story belongs to, but I’ve read 7 chapters and I love it! It’s beautifully written, and you’ve really managed to capture the humour and liveliness involved in every aspect of the story.This is my first time reading a humour novel on Inkitt...

quonisabailey: I love this book!!! I can't wait for the second one. I wish we had a backstory on foster though. I also wished we know why Mitchell was so dangerous. he seemed like the great reliable friend. anyway good jog with this book and keep up the great work!!

Sinhala-Kella (aka Scandal Mania): Hey Fazio, I LOVED your story! The bus - I don't watch Grey's but that was vividly shocking! And the last paragraph where you said April was engaged to one man but rushed in to save another. It was sooo cute the way Jackson won April back - there were so many lovely bits - 'Shonda' (LOL!).You nee...

alyssaleigh01: This book is the first book i read on this app and lets just say i was not disappointed! The story line of this is so amazing. it shows the twists of true friendship and how it can change how you view everything. I finished this book in 2 days and would not stop till i did. Highly recommend!