I Love You More than Myself Part One

Chapter 30

The only guy that will ever be good enough for you Is the one who thinks he doesn't deserve you. - Unknown Author

(I LOVE this one! Too perfect!)


*Sirius's POV*

Yeah I know about the kiss. Do I resent Remus for getting his hands on her first? Yeah, I guess you could say I do. But I'm not giving up hope that she will change her mind. I mean common. Who doesn't want a piece of this?

There she sits in the Gryffindor common room, clad in sweatpants and a t-shirt splattered in dried mud. Today, she had chosen dark brown hair that matched her eyes. It was pulled up into a messy bun complete with black glasses. Still, she was the most attractive girl I'd seen at this school, except maybe the slag from her dorm, Scarlet. And yes, she is a slag. I've heard more about her than you would ever want to know.

I was just examining her outfit when I noticed her continuously glancing over at my pal Remus. Now, don't get me wrong, Remus is still my best friend, more like my brother. But I am totally jealous of him. He kissed her! And she kissed him back! I hadn't told her I knew about it before now. I figured I'd try and keep it a secret, but seeing this made jealousy boil up inside me like a tea kettle.

"Waitin' for another kiss, chickadee?"

This totally caught her off guard. Her head whips around to face me, indifferent. I know she's trying to hide it, but she is utterly embarrassed.

"What are you talking about, Sirius?" James asks to my left. For once in my life, I had kept a secret from James. The secret of the Remus and Tonks romance.

"She kissed Moony over there," I say blatantly.

"Who's Moony?" he asks.

"Who's Moony," I answer sarcastically. Who else would be Moony?

"Are you talking about Remus?" he asks. He had less brains than I had thought.

"Well duh!" I exclaim. "Who else would be Moony?"

"I dunno…" James said, picking up his sports magazine again.

"Do you like the nickname?" I ask.

"I do," James says. "It's very fitting."

"What do you think Tonks?" I ask her, turning back to her face that had now registered shock.

"Uhm… well," she stammers, trying to start a sentence.

"Whas wrong with you?" James asks, putting down his magazine again.

"N-nothing," she says again, her eyes darting back to me every few seconds.

"She's caught off guard because I know about her kiss," I explain.

"What kiss?" James asks again.

"Yeah, what kiss?" she asks, but I know she's lying. She knows exactly what I'm talking about and she was caught off guard.

"The one between you and Remus," I explain.

"We- we didn't-" she starts.

"Oh common, don't even try to lie," I say, chuckling.

"Sirius I have no idea what you're talking about," she says, finally gaining the confidence to lie.

"Tonks, I saw it with my own eyes!" I say, sitting up. "You cant lie, chickadee." That was a name I had gotten in the habit of calling her recently. I liked it.

"We didn't kiss!" she exclaims.

"I saw you!" I say. "I was walking to find where you two had run off to and I saw you two eating each others faces!"

She sits there in shock for a second, her jaw hanging wide open.

"Is that true?" James asks, startling me.

"Well of course!" I say, turning to him.

"When?" he asks.

"Few months ago," I answer, turning back to face her. She still sat there with her jaw to the floor.

"Well it finally happened!" James says, giving a small applause. This makes my stomach knot up in anger. How dare he, when he knows how much I like her?

"Yeah, yeah. We all knew Remus and Tonks were gonna fall in love," I say sarcastically.

"We are not in love!" she says, her face growing redder by the second.

"Your face says it all chickadee," I say plainly. She seems to feel her bright red face and relaxes, throwing herself back against the couch her and Remus occupied.

"Alright…" she says. "You win Sirius."

I give a small whoop and I turn to face James, who was the one in shock now.

"You really did it?" he asks, throwing down his magazine and sitting up.

"Well…" she starts, embarrassed. "Yeah."

"Holy shit!" James says, overreacting a bit. "How was it?"

"Uhm…" she says, biting her lip. "Nice."

"Nice?" James asks incredulously. "Just nice?'

"Nice!" she says, going even a deeper shade of scarlet. "Just nice!"

After all this excitement, Remus stirs.

"What's going on?" he asks groggily.

"Congratulations Remus!" James exclaims.

"What did I do?" he asks, throwing his head back down on the book.

"You kissed Tonks, of course!"

This seems to stop him in his tracks. He sits straight up, alert, and faces Tonks.

"Wha- wha-?" he tries to form the sentence.

"I'm sorry!" she squeals, putting her beet red face in her hands.

"She didn't tell us," I say, not wanting Remus to be mad at her. Although I wish they would leave each other alone, I didn't want to see her unhappy.

"She didn't?" Remus inquires.

"No, I saw you," I explain. Tonks tentatively pulls her face out of her hands and looks at Remus.

"You saw us?" Remus asks, his face slowly turning the shade of Tonks's.

"Yeah," I say bluntly.


I take a minute to re-tell my story.

"Oh my God…." he says, pulling his face over his hands as well.

"The corridor isn't exactly a private place," I say, chuckling.

I see Tonks look over at Remus and they lock eyes. I sigh.

"I guess you're right," he admits.

"Can you not tell anyone?" Tonks blurts out.

"But… aren't you two a couple now?" James asks.

"Uhm… well…" Remus says, looking at Tonks. "No."

"You aren't?" I ask, as shocked as James is.

"It's a long story," Remus explains. I know he doesn't want to get into the full details with us at this moment, but mark my words, I will find out. I mean common, I'm Sirius Black.


*Tonks's POV*

I can't believe someone knows! I cannot believe it! How embarrassing!

"So do you promise to keep it a secret?" I ask.

"Sure," Sirius says, falling back against the couch.

"James?" Remus asks next to me.

"Of course," he says. "I'm just so happy it happened!"

"Uhm… yeah," Remus says, glancing down into his lap, obviously uncomfortable.

The rest of the evening is very awkward indeed. Not much more goes on besides James flipping through his magazine, Sirius re-reading Quidditch Through the Ages, and Remus and I sitting there awkwardly. James soon announces that we should go to bed.

"Might as well," Sirius responds. "Big day tomorrow."

Soon, James and Sirius are heading for the dorms.

"Coming chickadee?" Sirius asks me.

"Give me a second, I would like a word with Remus," I explain, turning to face the man himself. He gives me a small grin and sets his bags down on the couch.

"Fine," Sirius says, continuing on to the dorms. As he ascends the spiral stairs, I hear him whisper to James: "They just want to snog some more." I don't know why he's so upset over this whole thing. I wait until their dorm door closes to turn back and speak to Remus.

"Remus-" I start, but I'm cut off by his lips meeting mine. The sweet scent of him comes off his raggedy Gryffindor t-shirt. Our sweatpant-clad legs are glued together. I couldn't more if I wanted to. His strong arms wrap around my waist, holding me there as if I were his life source. Like if he ever let me go, he would die….

This kiss lasts longer than the ones that came before it. It was the best one so far. His soft lips slowly caressed mine, his fingers slowly tracing invisible patterns on my back. It was almost soothing.

I vaguely wondered why he was doing this. After all, he was the one to say Wait a year. This a dumb rule as far as I'm concerned. I could snog him like this all day. I want to be loved like this forever.

All too soon, we break apart, taking slow, deep breaths still pressed against one another. I slowly open my eyes and realize how close we really are. I can see the hundreds of different shades of amber his eyes are. I can count the number of faint freckles and eyelashes on his face. Our eyes are locked, taking in everything we could about the other.

All of a sudden, he breaks away from me, striding over to collect his bag and almost running up the spiral staircase, past the landing, and up the stairs leading to the boys dorm. He leaves me standing there all by myself in the Gryffindor common room, still trying to catch my breath, still trying to make sure my heart was still beating. I soon realize that he had taken it with him.


What do you think about Sirius's POV? Please comment!

I really like this one! ^.^ Funny AND romantic.



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