Play Me A Country Song


“Oh my gosh... I think he just touched your pancake... and im pretty sure he had himself a good ball scratch a minute ago.” Paul hissed at Jake. “Hell no... You saw it. You get the ballsack pancake." Jacob/OC pairing. All of you team Jacob fan come on in! - After losing his dad, Jacob sells his Auto shop to stay afloat when Bella turns into a diva and string him along just or her next shopping trip. Lexi comes into his life and everything begins to change. Jacob doesn't expect A hell cat from Texas to come in and shake his whole world up. But looking past their almost constant fights, They end up being each others rock. Jacob is confused at what to do. On one side, he has Bella, the girl he has always loved and would do anything for. And she is finally paying attention to him. Then on the other side, there is Lexi, who has the biggest heart he has ever seen, and would offer the shirt off her back to anyone, but refuses to be disrespected and has one hell of a temper to show for it. And imprinting on Lexi just makes his decision so much harder. as Jacob cant make up his mind, Lexi decides to try and have a relationship with him, despite his conflict.. Jacob doesn't push her away... But sometimes these things don't go as planned. **I do not own twilight or any of its characters! This is fan made only!**

Romance / Humor
Chrissy U.
Age Rating:

Chapter 1


I walked through the house, making sure I didnt forget anything I needed and went through a mental checklist. Checking everything off as I went. It felt weird. I would miss the sweltering Texas heat, and the bone chilling dry cold air in the winters. I will miss my Daisy and luke. My sister and adopted brother, who without, I never would be able to do what im about to do right now.

I walk out the door and look around the portch, Daisy was already waiting in the old beat up chevy pickup, waiting to take me to the airport. I jumped in.

“You sure you wanna do this? I mean Im sure that this guy Jacob can take care of it for ya if you just tell him what you want done.” Trying one last time to change my mind.

I knew this wasnt easy for her, we have been through so much together, and together we stand against the strongest storm with our heads held high. Smiling, I lean across the seat and give her a big hug.

“Im sure. You know how i like things done a certain way, and it wont be done right if im not there supervising.” She snickered and shook her head.

Cranking the old rust bucket we headed for the airport. This is going to be the longest flight ever. Uggg I dont like planes, but it sure beats the hell out of a 4 day drive. She pulled the truck up to the curb by the doors.

“Ok here you go. Dont forget to call me when you land to let me know you didn’t crash and get eaten by a shark or something.”

“Oh har har, Not gonna happen. Im to boney for a shark. How bout a guppy.” I laughed Leaning over i gave her one last hug.

Jumping out of the truck, I grabbed my bags and headed to security check with ticket in hand. By the time i finally got out of security check it was time to board my flight. Damn that was good. Hope the entire flight goes as smoothly.


I walked off the plane rubbing my ass. Why the hell didnt anyone tell me that turbulance on a low class coach seat does a number on ur boney ass cheeks. Damn, i’m not ever getting back on that damn tin can with wings again. i would rather hoof it. So much for smooth.

I grabbed my bags from the baggage claim and made my way to the car sales place. I took in my options and just about chucked up my lunch looking at the damn prices. Fuck me runnin’.

“Can I help you?” A man walks up to me in a snazzy suit and smiles an akward smile at me. Well then... Creepy is not even a word for it.

“Uhh, yeah. Im lookin’ for a truck. I need something reliable and affordable. Do ya got anything like that here?” I asked.

I watched as the gears worked in his head and a cocky grin formed on his face. Was this dude on crack?

“Well you came to the right establishment, we have this really nice chevy camero right here, gets great gas milage and has clean interior and runs as smooth as the day it was made. Let me crank it up for you.” I watched as he ran back into the danky little office and come back out with a set of keys. The price on the car read $25,000 plus tax and title. How did this man get such nice cars when his establishment looked like it had been run through horse shit.

The man smiled at me as he slipped into the driver seat and turned the key over. Immediatly I heard the familier clanking and banging of a faulty engine just barely being held together. The white billow of smoke out the back of the tale pipe being the tell tale sign of a blown head. Ummm. I dont think so.

“See, she purrs like a kitten and can be your for only 25...” I cut him off with a raised hand.

“No thank you. But I think you need to fire your mechanic. This car has serious problems.” Eyeing me with disdain, now that i called what i was sure a prized possession trash.

“I assure you miss, this car is very much brand new and has no problems.” he said way to politely. Hm I think i hurt his feelings. Oh well, I will not buy a lemon to break down on me for a whoppin 25,000 bucks.

“Well that may be your oppinion and you are intitled to it. Though all the same sir, that car needs to be run across the scales. Blown Heads are not easy or cheap to fix.” I replied back crossly.

“I would like a dependable vehicle and if you cannot offer that here, I will call a cab and go else where.” He started to turn purple in the face. Snickering, i turned and walked outside to call a cab. When he pulled up i quickly gathered my things and got in.

“Where to miss?” he asked politely

“Can you take me to a used car lot with decent employees please?” I all but begged. He chuckled.

“Yes miss I can. I charge $10 a mile though.”

“Ok thats fine, just get me out of here. That sleezball tried to sell me a camero for $25,000 with a blown head.” I huffed and sat back in the seat as he maneuvered us on to the hwy. Sighing with relief as i watched the place get smaller and smaller.

Twenty minutes later we pulled into a ma and pop used car lot in forks washington. All though it has constantly drizzled here, i could get use to this place. He parked in the front and printed me an invoice for his services. Looking over it I saw it was roughly $400.32. Pulling out my wallet i gave him $430.00 for the ride into forks.

“Thank you ma’am. Hope you have a nice stay. If you need me to take you any where else, dont hesitate to call me.” he said while handing me his business card.

Nodding i grabbed my bags and walked into the main lobby and spoke to the elderly gentalman behind the counter. I was in luck he had a nice 01 chevy silverodo that ran great. It just needed a tune up. Shaking his hand i handed him a check for the truck and headed towards lapush.

It was getting late so i decided to just get to the house and unpack. Parking, I grabbed all my bags and headed to the porch. Looking around for the key that was suppose to be hidden on the porch under a potted plant. Well that wouldn’t have been a problem if there actually was a potted plant on this damn porch.

I walked around the house, looking in every crevice I could possible find for this damn plant and didnt find any by the time I made it back to the portch. I looked up ready to cuss the bastard for playing tricks when I see one hanging right above my head. I reached up on my tip toes and padded the soil with my hands, and felt the metal surface of the key. Just to let you know asswhole, the key wasnt under the potted plant.

Unlocking the door, I shoved it open and walked into the house. I didnt waist time and found my room, quickly unpacking and calling Daisy before she had a caniption fit.

“Lexi?” She answered, and I sighed.

“Yeah, I just called to let you know that im here.” I sat on the bed and pulled my legs up into indian style.

“Great, how was your flight?” She asked and I groaned.

“It was horrible. My ass is still sore and numb at the same time.” I said and she laughed. I frowned slightly.

“Its not funny, I feel like my butts gonna fall off. It feels... flabby.” I said getting an urge to reach back and rub my backside again. She just busted out giggling.

“Ok, well tell me what the new roommate is like?” She asked. She was talking about Jacob... Truth was... I didnt know.

“I dont know. I just got to the house and unpacked. I havnt seen him.” I needed to cut this call short or she would keep me on the phone all day. “Look Sis, I gotta go, I need to check the cabinets and make sure there is enough food and probably go grocery shopping. Ill call you later. Love you! and be nice to luke!” I said and heard her laugh again.

“I make no promise. Ok, love you.”

I quickly pulled on a pair of jean shorts and a short sleeve T-shirt because it was surprisingly a little warmer today then I had expected, and shoved my phone in the back pocket.

The kitchen was almost bare, just what I expected from a man. Well... I guess its off to a grocery store for me. Cant have a bad first impression, and the quickest way to a mans good graces is through his stomach.


It didnt take me long to finish the shopping and put them up. I was currently in the middle of cooking some chilli when I heard the front door open and clatter against the wall, and three loud men.

“Smells good in here Jake, got yourself a new girl?” I heard one ask.

“Nope, but I was expecting someone. Maybe she’s here. I dont know.” The one I was assuming to be Jake answered. I stirred my chilli one more time, placed the spoon down and decided to go and say hi.

I walked out of the kitchen with a smile on my face, and into the living room where the men were currently now piled on the couch watching the new episode of swamp people.

“Hi! Im lexi.” I said, introducing myself to the men on the couch. Not even one of them turned a glance at me. Ok... Lets try this again.

“Im making some Chilli, and was wondering if you were hungry?” I asked. Still not even a flicker in my direction. That fucking it.

I stormed to the Tv and pressed the button, effectively turning if off. The loud shouts in protest and curses in my direction proved I had finally gotten their attention.

“Now That I have your attention, Which one of you happens to be Jake?” the guy on the left jumped up and shoved passed me to turn the tv back on.

“That would be me. Word of advice, dont turn my tv off when im watching it. Didn’t your parents every teach you that stuff is rude.” He said.

Ok, Well if thats how you want to play.....Lets play big man. I got your rude right here.

“Oh, how rude of me to interupt your show. I was thinking you would like to know im here and cooking you food, but thats ok ill just mossey on back in the kitchen where my little woman self belongs.” i said tooth acheingly sweet. Smiling at him i turn to head to the kitchen.

He had a beat up little tv, so what i was about to do was a mercy. Grabbing the butcher knife i had on the counter i walked back to the door frame separating the kitchen from living room. Swinging my arm with accurate aim I watched as i flung the knife end over end untill it hit dead center in the screen. Leaning into the door jam with my arms crossed i waited for the shocked exspression to turn my way with anger once again.

“What the fuck? You just destroyed my tv. What is wrong with you, you phsyco?” He hollered at me.

Standing straight, i slowly walked untill i was standing infront of the trio.

“Listen and Listen good. I am not some homely house wife who will sit by and be told what to do, ignored, or threatened. I came out of that kitchen trying to introduce myself, tried twice actually. Went shopping so i could cook dinner for you on my first night here with jet lag. The best i got from you was a threat of turning off your tv when you were oviously watching a re-run. Wanna ask me if my parents taught me not to be rude?! Well how about yours....and yours.....and yours!” I said pointing at each of them. By the end of my little rant i had raised my voice slightly.

Looking into the eyes of each on of them i walked back to the kitchen to finish my dinner. Pulling the corn bread out of the oven and giving the chili one last stir i started to set up the table. Once set i sat down and made myself a plate. Hollering to them to let them know the food was done.

They came and sat at the table and made themselves a bowl each taking a slice of corn bread as well.

“Eat up i made plenty.” I said as i started eating my chili.

It was quiet for a while. No one wanting to break the silence.

“This is really good.” One of them said. I smiled and thanked him.

“My name is Alexis, What are your names?” I asked politley, taking a bite full of my chili.

“Im Embry, And I gotta say, this Chili is really good. Where did your learn to cook like this?” He asked. I got a goof ball vibe from him, but smiled and nodded.

“Thank you. And My Daddy taught me and my sister. Its my Mema’s recipe. Glad you like it.” I said looking back at the other men at the table.

“Dont be rude you two.” Embry said, nudging the other two men. I just rolled my eyes. These two were so disrespectful and rude. I didnt know if I would have the patience to put up with their spoiled attitudes. I huffed and turned to Jacob.

“Look, tomorrow, Im going to be in the shop going over the books, and customer logs. Im going to need you to highlight all of the regulars and a list of all my employees. Can you manage that?” I asked a little more then fed up. He just shrugged like it was nothing and nodded.

Good. Now were on the same page.

“You owe me a new Tv, and I expect it by tomorrow.” He said, pointing his spoon at me. Oh really now?

“Yea, I dont think so. You see, If you hadnt pissed me off, then maybe you would still have one. They say everything happens for a reason you know.” I said, getting up from my spot at the table and went to the kitchen to start with the clean up.

I layed in bed that night, but didnt get a lick of sleep. The fucking wolves around this place seem to like to pow wow all hours of the fucking night, and they did it really close to the house. Better go into town tomorrow and find a shotgun. Cant ever be to safe.


I woke up from my blaring alarm clock, and groaned. I shoved myself from the comfy sheets and padded my way into the kitchen, getting ready to start my morning ritual. I grabbed the coffee from the cabinet and looked around for the pot without luck... Are you kidding me?! What kind of person doesnt have a damn coffee pot in their house?! I became frantic and pissed at the same time. Me without coffee in the morning is like ripping my cigs from my mouth. A big hell no.

“Hey, you cooking breakfast?” Jacob asked coming into the kitchen.

“Sure... When you can conjure me up a coffee pot. When I dont have a steamy cup of coffee and a cigarette in the morning, I dont do a damn thing for no mother fucker.” I said storming back into my room to get dressed and have a cigarette before I had to go to the shop.


This bitch was fucking crazy. First she throws a damn knife into my Tv, Then she bites my head off. What the fuck is her problem? Because if she dont fix it soon, There will be a bigger problem then her fucking attitude.

I cant exactly say that I like the bitch because, I really dont. She has come into my town, taking over my shop, and is in my damn house. What the fuck was I thinking when I made this deal. Ugh!

I heard her huff from her room, then the door popped open to reveal her fully dressed in a pair of jeans, a long sleeve thermal and a pair of boots. Looking at her just pissed me off further.

“Bitch, Just to set the record straight, this is my damn house, next time I ask you something, I expect a straight answer. You can leave the fucked up attitude back home with your hillbilly friends. I dont care. Just dont bring it to me. Got that shit?!” I said. I was heated. So maybe I was a little more rude then I should have been but damn this bitch pissed me off and I havnt even known her for a full 24 hours yet!

“Listen here fuck boy, keep flapping your gums and Im gonna shove my size 8 1/2 up your damn ass. Hillbilly style. Got. That. Shit!” She punctuated ever word with a hard jab to my chest, which resulted in me smacking her hands away.

I watched her grab her keys and head toward the door.

“Where the fuck do you think your going?” This shit was far from over. I watched her turn around sweetly to me with a smile. Fake and full of pure meaness.

“Im going to get some coffee so you will live to see another day, then Im going to work. Dont be late. I would hate to have to Fire you.” She said, and calmly walked out of the house. Damn. Why the fuck did I sell the shop to this bitch of all people. Because she offered more then my asking price... Thats why. Damn if I wasnt a bit turned on. I looked down at my dick which was half mass.

“Traitor.” I said, Rearranging it, and walking to my room to get ready for work.


I pulled up to the shop and killed the engine, wincing when I heard the most horrible shit coming from the shop. Rap.

I got out of the truck and walked in. I recognized the man from last night catastophy dinner and figured he was one of the employee’s along with Embry and a few other men. Jake was bending over the hood of a police cruiser, checking the oil, and water.

A lil wayne song came on and I glared at the CD player playing the horrible shit. Poor boom box. I shifted and used my hip to knock if off the counter it was sitting on. All eyes turned to me, Jake had a look of pure anger in his eyes.

“What the hell?!” He yelled, tossing a red shop rag on the ground.

“Opps, Ill get right on replacing that. But until then, We can just use mine. It doesnt pick up channels very well, but dont you worry none, I have CD’s!” I said smiling, as I pulled Bobby Bare from my case and cranked up the Volume when Marie Laveau began playing through the speakers. Jake just stood at the police cruisers hood, eyes wide and a dumb look on his face.

“Get to work, I need to go over the books and logs.” I said, stepping into the office and shutting the door. It was starting to become fun to mess with this fucker. he was some kind of weird and I couldnt understand him. If he would play nice, I would to. But Fat chance that would be.

I sat down at the beat up old office chair and cracked open the accounting book. I had to say, He kept strict collection of all of his finances, but none of them were up to par. All of his profits were significantly low and he could have been making several thousand more a month then he was. He seemed have began to lose his customers a few months ago, and it just kept getting worse, until last month when they hit an all time low, and he sold the shop to me. I had no doubt I could whip this place into shape, and get it back up and running. It would just take time and alot of sacrifice. It was time to bring in the discounts and advertisements.

I booted up the computer and set to work on flyers with advertised discounts on small simple fixes. Maybe if people trusted us with the small things, they would come to us later with a bigger problem, and tell their friends and neighbors... I hoped this worked.

“Jake!” I yelled out of the office door, catching his attention from chatting around with the other workers.

“I need you to ask a few of the men to drive into Forks and Seattle and post these flyers. They will of course be paid still for a full days work.” I said handing him the small stack of flyers. He huffed and turned away.

“Was the police cruiser up to standard?” I asked.

“Yes, Charlie comes in here all the time for small oil checks and water checks. Its going to need a complete tune up soon.” He said.

“Good job, and the profit?” I asked, ready to add it to the months books.

“Only $20. I dont usually charge him much.” He said and I nodded.


Later that night While I cooked supper, Jacob was on the phone with what sounded like his girl, and he seemed to be trying to convince her of something.

I grabbed the sheppards pie from the oven and set the table, calling Jacob to dinner. He seemed really tense and upset.

“Whats wrong?” I asked. For some reason I hated seeing him so upset.

“None of your damn business.” He snapped, and I doubled back. What the fuck did I do to you this time?

“Ok. Look. I dont know what I did for you to snap at me like that, but it wont happen again. I am a very tempermental bitch with a short fuse and you have been burning me for the past two day. I wont last much longer before I explode and part that pretty little hair of yours.” i said finishing up my dinner and cleaning up the kitchen.

Sitting in my bed, I called Daisy.

“Hey Lex, Whats up?” She asked, chipper. Fuck Chipper right now.

“Hey Daisy. Just calling to check up on things. You still gonna send the the month reports right? Keeping up with the books and such?” I asked. I knew she was able to and would do it... I just needed to think of something else other then the fucker in the room over and the wolves prowling outside my window.

“Yep, its all been taking care of. Ill send them at the end of the month, just like planned. So, Tell me, How is Washington? Is it as cold as they say, The rain to much?” She asked.

“Its chilly, but not freezing like I though it would be... atleast yet. And the rain sucks, but it surprisingly doesnt bother me to much.”

“What about the new roomie?”

“Oh, well dont get me started on his stupid ass. He has a one track mind, eat, work, Tv, and piss me the fuck off. Dai, he dont even have a fucking coffee pot!” I hissed into the phone feeling my cheeks heat up.

“Oh, well poor guy. You can be a real grinch in the mornings without it. Ha ha. Is he hot?” She asked and I rolled my eyes.

“Well hes an asswhole.” I retorted.

“Yeah, I get that. But is he a hottie?” She asked. What the fuck is with this girl?

“Well, he’s pretty good looking, but that doesnt matter, cause I cant stand to even share the air with him for more then a few seconds and I wanna bash his face in.”

“Do you want me to come kick his ass?” She said, laughing on the other end.

“Oh I wish, but if he dont grow the fuck up, I might end up kicking his ass myself.” I said smirking at the mental picture.

“Well sis, I have to get to bed. Gotta get up in a few hours. I love you, give luke a hug for me. Bye.” I hung up, plugging my phone into the charger and laying down. I prayed for a better day tomorrow, and let sleep pull me under.


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