Amnesia Completa


The gentle, almost graceful way in which the colored leaves fell down, leaving the trees nude, bald and ugly, couldn't distract her from the current situation. Aqua sighed wearily, as she looked out of the dirty window. She made a mental note to clean them this weekend… if it didn't rain, that is. However, she couldn't bring herself up to do it now.

She followed one particular leaf with her eyes, until it quietly fell on the ground. It was a soft, wine-red color. Just like Kairi's hair.

Red leaves had always been Aqua's favorite ones... But not anymore. She prefered the brown ones now, the ones that looked dead and crushed, both from the outside and the inside. Not the fire-kissed ones, fresh and spicy, but the forgotten, burned ones. Why? Because she felt exactly the same as those. She remembered a time when she had loved to collect different kind of leaves of all shapes and sizes. The bluenette would let some of them dry, putting them between her favorite books, until they were so dry that she could get rid of the green. That way, only the leaf's frame was left, along with a maze of its veins. Other leaves, however, were too beautifully colored to do that, so she'd keep them whole.

Sometimes Terra would help her too, but not without reminding her every three seconds that she was such a girl, to which she would retort, "What was your first clue?"

It had been their tradition when fall came around the corner. Now, it was merely an old tradition that she missed more than anything.

Aqua wasn't in the mood to do anything productive as of lately. Even worse was the fact that the days went by so slowly during fall. It was maddening. Almost as though she had all the time of the world now and to be honest, the blue-haired woman didn't know what to do with that feeling. Yes, there had been times that she'd felt much better, but yesterday had changed everything.

Eight words, that was all it took to shatter her heart into a billion pieces, again.

"I proposed to Kairi... And she said 'yes.'"

These words kept plaguing her, over and over again. That one thing she'd feared the most had happened. Terra, her best friend and biggest crush since her childhood, would marry the oh so perfect Kairi on the first day of spring, next year. And she was supposed to be happy about that...even if the chances of her ever being with Terra had now dropped to exactly minus ten percent.

What had happened next, had been just as painful; the brunet man had asked her - no, he'd pleaded - to be his second at his wedding. With much difficulty from her side, she had muttered a quiet, "Sure."

How could she ever refuse anything he asked her when she was so deeply in love with him? Call it utterly pathetic, but even if she knew she couldn't get Terra, she still wanted to be near him. It made her happy to see him. He was like her drug; she needed to be around him in order for her mind to be at ease.

One would wonder why she'd never tried to tell him how she felt. Truth was, she had, countless times before. But Terra...he just didn't see it, all those little hints she always left for him, ready to be picked up. Aqua had always been naturally shy. That was the main reason why she didn't tell him right away. That, and the fact that he might not return the feelings. After all, the more obvious she would make it, the more he seemed to be ignoring it. Terra couldn't really be that dense that he hadn't noticed anything by now, right?

And then, just when she'd finally gathered enough courage to tell him everything, he just had to meet Kairi and start dating her. She'd been happy for him, of course, but so hurt. This had confirmed Aqua's suspicions that Terra would never look at her the way she looked at him. She had been friendzoned a long time ago.

How funny; usually it was the guy that got friendzoned. Wasn't that what always happened in those cliché movies? Apparently, the other way around was possible too. What do you know...

Aqua's attention then fell on her own reflection in the mirror. She inspected herself thoroughly, starting with her cerulean colored hair (she didn't remember if she'd combed it today or not. It didn't matter, anyway. Why should she make a fuss about combing her hair when she had lost everything?) No wonder Terra never paid any attention to her. Compared to Kairi, she was nothing. She'd heard once that Terra liked girls with short hair, so she had cut her hair, keeping it short ever since. And yet, Kairi had rich, long wine-colored hair. Her perfection seemed effortless. She'd seen Terra run his hands through her long locks in amazement often enough, making her heart wrench in jealousy.

When did his taste in girls change? Probably the moment she had decided to look more tomboy-ish.

And what about Aqua's cerulean eyes, that pretty much matched her hair. There was no beauty in them. Kairi's eyes were different, though; mysteriously violet, probably holding as many secrets as Kairi herself. How often had the brunet man admitted that he practically drowned in her eyes every time he looked into them? But had he ever taken a millisecond to look at Aqua's eyes? No, never. Or maybe the bluenette would never let him, knowing how she would blush when he looked at her for too long.

As for their skin, both Kairi's and Aqua's skin was fair. The only difference was that the latter knew how the former's face was flawless. Her cheeks even gave her dimples when she smiled. Let that be one of Terra's weaknesses (and Aqua's as well. Especially because Terra had them, too).

This was so not fair. Kairi was a goddess compared to Average Aqua. No wonder Terra had fallen head over heels for little Miss Perfect.

For the first time in years, the autumn would be cold, dark and long.

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