"Boo? I have plans for today." Darren said, snuggling up to you even closer. You felt his chest pressing your back, while Darren wrapped his hands around your waist.
After having admitted that you both felt, you spent hours cuddling. Although both were very frantic and excited to have finally admitted that you loved each other, both were very tired because you'd been crying. For that reason, you decided to go to sleep, this time together, in Darren's bedroom. After all, you'd have plenty of time to continue enjoying time together and explore your lips. When Darren kissed you that night, was the best thing that happened to you. You wanted to kiss him since a long time ago, to see how it'd feel kissing his lips, but you always had that desire repressed for fear of losing a friend. But now you knew that Darren felt the same as you. His lips were as you'd imagined even better than what you'd imagined. His lips were very soft but a little rough at the same time, they were firm lips. Darren was a good kisser. His kiss started slowly, as he leaned his hand on your upper neck, then he deepened the kiss keeping the rhythm for a while and went back to soften the kiss, gently biting your lower lip from time to time. Just by his kisses, Darren made you experience something that you had never experienced before, he made you feel emotionally attached what actually was weird on you; he made you feel that tingling in the tummy sensation. You couldn't understand how you'd controlled yourself that night to not get carried away by the passion you were feeling. Although, you were grateful for that because you definitely didn't want to rush everything, you wanted to take things slowly and just enjoy what you were experiencing. But Darren was so irresistible for you. You couldn't understand how you'd been so lucky to be with him in this way, all seemed very surreal like you were dreaming and you couldn't wake up. But if it was a dream, you didn't want to wake up ever.
You and Darren were lying in bed together, and it felt great to be curled up to him. It'd always been very nice to be snuggled up to him, but this time was different from all those times you'd been huddled in bed, because this time neither of you had to worry or feel nervous if your lips touched accidentally. Darren started to gently rub his cheek on your shoulder while you grabbed Darren's hands which were resting on your waist, smiling pleasantly.
"What do you mean? What plans do you have? Do you really have to work or something?" You said sighing and pouting. You really didn't want Darren to leave.
"None of that. I have plans for both of us." Darren said, kissing gently your shoulder and smiling.
"Really? What plans?" You asked intrigued, still with your eyes closed and smiling pleasantly.
"Hmmm…plans." Darren answered hoarsely, what sounded extremely sensual.
Darren stopped kissing your shoulder to start kissing gently all your neck slowly going up to your jaw line. He gently placed his lips against your neck, behind your ear. Then he sent a shudder through your skin by gently growling and humming. - Oh what the hell is he doing? Oh damn, this feels so…fucking good. – Darren was officially teasing you; he really needed to stop that because you were already turning on. But you didn't do anything to stop him; you couldn't because it was feeling so good, you wanted more. You tried to turn around to kiss his lips, but Darren prevented you from moving. Then Darren pressed his body against you, starting to rub his hands in your stomach under your shirt while he started to kiss your earlobe and then suck it softly. You let out a softly moan and tried to turn around again to face Darren. This time, Darren let you turn around, and as soon as you did it, he pulled you against him even closer. This time, Darren let you turn around, and as soon as you did it, he pulled you against him even closer. You didn't know when that happened, but Darren was shirtless and you could feel the warmth of his bare chest. Darren lined up his lips with yours and slowly he licked your bottom lip. You opened your mouth slightly and Darren brushed your upper lip slowly. Then he tilted his head slightly to one side to angle his face with yours, giving you a gentle and soft closed-mouth kiss. Then Darren started to brush his tongue against your lips ever so slightly and you parted your lips, so Darren gently pushed his tongue a little farther into your mouth and playfully you both started to touch tongues. Darren let out a groan in the kiss and so you did. During the kiss, Darren placed his hands in your hips and slowly moved them around your back, while he intertwined his legs with yours, pulling you against his body while you started to rub his naked chest slowly. Then Darren leaned slowly to get on top of you and slowly he started to lift your shirt to finally take it off. Darren stopped kissing your mouth to slowly start kissing your neck, going down. He teased your neck, mixing kisses with licking and sucking. You moaned at this action, god it was feeling extremely pleasant. Darren went straight to your stomach and started to lick it, teasing around your belly button as you arched your back. Then he licked slowly your abdomen going up to your neck again.
"Darren..." You groaned, with your eyes closed and panting.
Darren suddenly stopped and you opened your eyes to look at him confused. - Why the hell has he stopped? - Darren was looking at you with a mischievous smile, resting his chin on your breast. Then he reached your lips again and kissed you softly. He looked at you again with the same mischievous smile before stand up and walk away from you. You looked at him confused and a little upset. - What the hell is he doing? Dammit, he cannot leave me right now. Not now. Damn, I'm so turned on. Why is he leaving the bedroom? -
"Darren... What? What are you doing?" You asked from the bed, looking at him a little desperate. Darren turned around to look at you lustfully, smiling naughtily.
"I said I had plans for both of us today. So get up and get ready to go." Darren said grinning amusingly and turned back to leave the bedroom.
"What the fuck Darren?" You yelled from bed as you buried your head in your pillow.
"Get ready, boo! We don't wanna be late!" Darren yelled from the kitchen and you could hear how he was laughing.
"Asshole." You said in a whisper as you sat in bed, a little upset and trying to chill out.
Okay, that was so embarrassing. The way you were looking at him desperate as he walked away from you with that amused smile. How the hell could he had done that? And he left the bedroom as if nothing had happened. Oh god, you hated him so much. You grabbed your shirt that was dropped on the floor and put it on to go to the bathroom and wet your head with cold water. After you chilled out, you went to the kitchen right where Darren was. He was peaceful, making breakfast with a big smile on his face. That's it. He wanted to tease? That was going to be what he was going to get. If he could tease you, you could tease him as well. You quietly sat on the chair and avoided his look. Darren approached the table and gave you a cup of coffee. He stood behind you, placed his hands on your shoulders and leaned to kiss your neck, but you pulled him away softly.
"Thanks for the coffee, Darren." You said smiling and you took a sip. Darren sat next to you, also smiling. "Oh it's delicious. But I'm starving. Can I take some cookies?" You looked at him intensely into his eyes, while you licked your lips slowly after you took another sip of coffee. Darren had his eyes fixed on your mouth and he gulped before answer.
"Yeah, sure. Hold on..." Darren said and he attempted to stand up but you stopped him.
"No, stay here. I'll get the cookies by myself." You said smiling and stood up to walk towards the cabinet where the cookies were, swinging your hips slightly.
You knew you couldn't reach the cookies, because even though Darren was short, you were shorter than him. Then Darren did exactly what you were expecting him to do. He approached you to help you get the cookies. He stood behind you and placed his hands on your hips, leaning his head to whisper in your ear.
"May I help you?" Darren whispered as you turned your head to look at him.
"I'd love that." You whispered in front of his lips, seductively. Darren shuddered a bit and then he fixed his eyes on your mouth, with his lips parted.
"Hmmm, yeah." Darren groaned softly, but he didn't do any attempt to reach the cookies, he kept his hands placed on your hips.
Then the moment you were expecting came. Darren pulled you closer, pressing your body against him and he leaned to kiss your lips. You let him kissing you and you deepened the kiss, placing a hand in his waistband and the other hand in his head, messing up his curls. Darren pulled you against the kitchen counter and again he pressed his body against yours while he started to rub your inner thigh. You slowly crept away your hand from his waistband to his ass. Darren groaned softly within the kiss and it made him thrust his hips against yours. You gently pinched his ass, what made Darren thrust his hips against yours again, but this time he started to lift your shirt. Then you stopped kissing him to suck his lower lip and slightly you nibbled it. Darren lifted you up and sat you on the kitchen counter, placing his body between your legs. You sucked his lower lip again slowly and then you nibbled his lips again, this time a little harder. Darren couldn't focus his sight at this time, and tried to kiss you hurriedly, but you turned your face to slowly pull him back and then you reached the pot of cookies.
"Hmmm, I got my cookies!" You said, smiling naughtily and then you returned to the table, leaving Darren alone in the kitchen.
"Teaser." Darren yelled from the kitchen. He didn't go to the table until minutes later. "Revenge?"
"Oh please, Darren. I'm not vindictive. I'm just giving you a taste of your own medicine." You smiled amused and ate a cookie, looking into Darren's eyes. "Anyway, you said we didn't want to be late. So I'm just rushing."
"You're such a sneaky devil, you know that right?" Darren sat and started to drink his coffee.
"Oh, I'll take it as a compliment." You said, smiling victoriously. "So, are you gonna tell me what's you plan?"
"I'm not telling you a shit now." Darren said, faking an offended face.
"Okay… then I'm just gonna take a shower and take a walk in this amazing day." You said, jokingly. Darren quickly looked up at you but you avoided his look.
"You wouldn't do that." Darren said quietly.
"Oh, wanna bet?" You said defiantly and stood up to walk to the bathroom, amused. Darren stood up as well and grabbed you by your wrist.
"Oh, c'mon." Darren said looking into your eyes. You shrugged and turned back to walk to the bathroom again, but Darren took you by your waist and pulled you against him. "What I planned…it's a surprise. And I won't tell you because I don't wanna mess it up."
"Should I trust you?" You asked, looking at him suspiciously.
"What kind of shit question is that? I thought you trusted me." Darren said faking an offended face and placing his right hand on his chest.
"Oh you're such a goober! Okay, yes. I trust you. But at least it's fair if you give me any clue! I mean, I don't know if we're gonna stay here, if I should change my clothes because we're going out, if we're gonna…" You started to say, slurred.
"Don't worry about anything! I already prepared everything while you were still sleeping. Probably you'd want to change your clothes, yes. Although going out on pajamas is cool." Darren interrupted you laughing.
"Alright, no. It's not cool going out on pajamas. It's embarrassing. I still don't understand what cool means to you." You said frowning but smiling. "And why didn't you wake me up? Oh damn, that's embarrassing too. I hope you didn't find me snoring or drooling." You laughed, and so did Darren.
"Well, I'm gonna tell you a secret." Darren said, getting closer to you, to whisper in your ear. "Sometimes I wake up before you do and I watch you sleep and I'm overwhelmed because you're so amazing and I don't know why I'm lucky enough to have you in my life; that you're here with me. And I know that I want to spend the rest of my life trying to make you as happy as you make me. So… that's all this surprise thing about."
You looked at Darren, straight in the eyes. You didn't like when people watched you sleeping, but he said it in a very cute and sweet way that you couldn't even say something to him. And Darren was telling you that he considered himself lucky to have you, but actually you were the lucky one to have him with you. You looked at Darren very intensely. Darren was perfect, literally perfect and you didn't believe a shit about that thing people used to say that no one is perfect. Or at least, Darren was perfect for you. Not only he was extremely funny, cheerful, goofy and silly; but he was nice, kind, sweet and adorable besides extremely attractive and sexy. Yes, you were the lucky one. You never could understand why a person like Darren was interested in a girl like you; you gave up on thinking about that because you couldn't find the answer. But there was Darren, looking at you fondly and you just melted. You looked at him with a fondly smile and then you hugged him tightly. Darren hugged you back as he kissed your head, gently rubbing your back.
"You don't have to try hard to make me happy, Darren. You could give me a gum wrapper and I'd be super happy." You said softly against his chest. Darren pulled you away gently to grab your cheeks and smile widely before peck your lips.
"You're so adorable. But I want to do this; I'd do anything for you." He smiled and patted your hair. "Now, c'mon. Change yourself while I grab the suitcases."
"What? Suitcases?" You looked at Darren confused.
"Yeah, suitcases. We're gonna run away from here to have a blast somewhere else. So, hurry up!" Darren said excited. You looked at him frowning but amused before going to the bedroom to change your clothes.
You stayed in the bedroom for a while, looking back on everything that happened in your life. A year ago, you were a depressed person who thought that nothing in your life could improve. You were a person who was lost in middle of this world; a person who thought that nothing good could come up, a hopeless person. And you were very weak, you always tried to run away from your problems, you never talked about them and you never did something to change it. You only thought that you had to survive in this world, because nothing was worth it. You had nothing, no family, no friends, no job, you had no one to love and be loved. Your life sucked. But now everything was completely the opposite, like very insanely different than that time. And a lot of years of pain changed abruptly in only a year. And everything changed thanks to Darren and his letters. How could a letter make such a difference in your life? You didn't know the answer, but you were sure about something: that really happened. Now that time when you were a depressed person seemed so far away. How could you think that nothing could improve? If that day you tried to kill yourself you hadn't received that letter, if you had get to kill yourself, nothing of what you were living now would be happening. You wouldn't have met Darren, you wouldn't have known what really love is, you wouldn't be able to experience finally how it feels to love and be loved. Darren had changed your life for good, he saved your life. And that was the main reason why you loved him that much. You thought that sometimes it doesn't matter for how long you know a person, what really matters is how intensely you've been through a lot of situations. There are some people you know for a lifetime and they never get to be close to you, because you don't share with them everything about you; and there are people you know for a very short time and you can't imagine living without them, because you gave them everything about you and they gave you everything about them. And that was what you had with Darren. Darren made you feel in a way you didn't feel since a long time ago; he was the person who always was trying to make you smile, to show you how wonderful life is when you're not alone; he was the person who showed you that even when we're lost and when everything seems to be lost, it really is not because we don't know what could happen, because there's still hope and there are still many things to live. Darren showed you that it doesn't matter how down you were, never is late to start over again; even if he didn't know he had done all that to you. With him you felt safe and loved, and it was a thing you wouldn't trade for anything in the world. That's why you loved him with all your heart, why he meant so much to you. You couldn't believe that all of this was happening to you, that you finally found the right way, that you found a person like him to share all your life. Because you wanted that, you wanted to spend all your life next to him because you've never been happier in your life, because he was the most extraordinary person you've ever met. You didn't want to let him go and you wanted to make him feel just as good and happy as he was making you feel. You wanted to give him the best in the world, because he really deserved all that. You kept thinking about how life can change abruptly when you less expect, how after all the suffering you can come back to be happy again. Suddenly, everything that made you unhappy vanished, it wasn't important, it was nothing compared to the happiness you were feeling now. You thought that after all life is still worth it. A little tear ran down your face while Darren poked his head out the door.
"Boo, are you ready to leave?" Darren asked, looking at you. You looked up to him with tearful eyes but smiling, what made Darren frown and come up to you, sitting on the edge of the bed and wrapping an arm around you. "Hey, are you crying?"
"No, I'm not crying." You looked at him, still with tearful eyes and smiling.
"So why is a tear running down your face? Hey, if you don't feel good to go somewhere we can leave it for another day. I'm here with you; you can tell me everything you want." Darren said sweetly, gently kissing your cheek.
"No, Dar. I'm just happy. So happy." You looked at him fondly and pecked his lips. "I'm ready to go."
"Are you sure?" Darren asked concerned, looking deeply into your eyes.
"More sure than ever." You answered with a fondly smile, letting him know that you were being honest. He caught that, because he smiled at you widely.
"So just let's go. I'm gonna make you even happier, just as you deserve."
"Darren, where are we going?"
"This is the fifth time you ask me that. I told you, surprise!"
You and Darren had been traveling for a long time and were leaving the city. You had no idea where you were going. You tried to ask several times, but he always answered the same. You were a little upset, even though you enjoyed surprises, you didn't have much patience and not knowing where you were going made you feel nervous. Not because you didn't trust Darren, but because you really wanted to know where you were going, at least a clue. You kept looking out the car window until you came up with a way maybe you could convince Darren to tell you something. You didn't know what was going on with you, but lately you were so flirty and you couldn't stop teasing Darren. In a way, you liked to be that way with Darren, because you liked the expression on his face whenever you teased him. You stopped looking out the window of the car to look at Darren in the eye, with a playful smile. Darren had his eyes fixed on the road.
"Darren…" You started to say, getting closer to him while Darren kept his sight on the road, driving.
"I told you is a surprise, so if you're thinking to ask me where are we going, you won't get another answer than that." Darren said, grinning.
"No, I wasn't about to ask you that." You said, playfully.
"No? Okay then, what did you want to ask me?"
"I was thinking..." You started to say with a mischievous smile, getting even closer to him to place your hand in Darren's inner thigh. Darren startled to feel your touch, but he kept his sight on the road. "Why don't you wanna tell me anything, not even a clue?"
"Because as I told you like six times, it's a surpr..." Darren started to say, but he stopped suddenly when you started to rub his inner thigh and when you approached him to start kissing his neck. "Stop that."
"Why would I stop?" You said seductively whispering in is ear while you started gently to suck his earlobe, still rubbing his inner thigh slowly. "I thought you liked my kisses." You whispered again in his ear and softly nibbled his earlobe, starting to lick his neck behind his ear.
"Exactly for that reason. We don't wanna have a car accident, do we?" Darren said, trying to control himself and it made you laugh but you didn't stop teasing him. Instead you kissed his jaw line slowly, pressing Darren's inner thigh. "Please, stop! Oh dammit, you really do whatever you can when you want to get something, don't you?"
"Yes, exactly Dar." You whispered in his ear and nibbled it again a little harder as Darren let out a softly moan.
"Fine, fine. I'm gonna tell you a clue. Note to myself: surprises aren't good for boo. If you want to surprise her, stop right that because she's gonna try to kill yourselves to get what she wants." Darren said chuckling as you laughed next to him and stopped teasing him. "We're going to somewhere we can walk, relax, swim and make a bonfire. That's all what I'm gonna tell you."
"Oh my god! We're going to the beach!" You said surprised and happy. Darren quickly looked at you amazed and then he returned his sight on the road.
"Oh wow. There you are, the surprise is screwed."
"Oh I love it! I can't remember the last time I went to the beach. Oh my god, Dar!" You said happily and kissed the corner of his mouth slightly. "This is the best surprise ever. I can't even thank you enough!"
"Right, right." Darren said giggling. "Now are you gonna stop? I really wanna get there alive."
"Yes, I promise now I'm gonna stop." You said smiling widely.
During the trip, you fell asleep. You knew that you were going to the beach, but you didn't know to which beach you were going to go. But you didn't bother to ask Darren, because just knowing that Darren was leading you to the beach made you happy. Darren knew how much you liked the beach and for how long you hadn't gone there, he knew that the last thing you wanted to do in your life would go to the beach, and this made sense as it seemed that you two were enjoying the most you could as if it were the last time. You fell asleep thinking of all the things that you could do on the beach together. Suddenly, you felt how the car stopped.
"Boo, wake up, we've arrived!" Darren said smiling and kissing your lips softly as you opened slowly your eyes.
You were in front of a huge house, a very nice place. You thought you were going to some hotel or something, but you were apparently in a house. The house was facing the sea and it was really wonderful. You looked at the house and the landscape amazed, the weather was warmth and nice. You went out the car and stayed stand in front the house till Darren approached you and grabbed your hand.
"We're in Dockweiler Beach and this is a house that we bought with my StarKid buddies a long time ago." Darren led you to the front door, holding your hand. "We were used to come here and partying when we were in college. It's a cool place; it's the only place where you can make a bonfire. Oh I have so many stories about it!" Darren said with a big smile, with a nostalgic look. "C'mon, let's go get in."
Darren opened the door and you just stood there, looking everything around you. That was an amazing place indeed. It wasn't so luxury but it had a lot of cool places, all that a StarKid would need to make funny things. But it seemed that someone was there, because there were some clothes dropped on the floor and there was some food on a coffee table, also you could listen some music coming from another room. Darren stood there frowning; apparently surprised that someone was there.
"That's weird. I didn't know someone was here. Hold on boo, I'm gonna check who's here." Darren said and pecked your lips before going to the room where the music was coming from.
You looked around again and you walked up to the couch to sit there and wait for Darren. Once there, you saw the clothes lying on the floor. Apparently there was more than one person because there were man and woman clothes. You wondered who could be there. Darren had told you that it was a house that he'd bought with his StarKid buddies, so probably the people who were there were his StarKid friends, or at least some of them. Well, definitely you weren't going to be alone with Darren but you thought it could be funny anyways. After several minutes, Darren returned and approached you.
"Well boo, we're not gonna be alone. Apparently some people decided to come over here and have a party. And, obviously for some lame reasons they haven't invited either me or you." Darren said and then some people walked up to where you were.
You tried to control your desire to fangirl when you saw Joey Ritcher, Joe Walker, Brian Holden, Joe Moses, Dylan Saunders, Lauren Lopez, Meredith Stepien, Bonnie Gruesen, Jaime Lyn Beatty and Julia Albain coming up to the room. They weren't all of them, but holy shit they were a few StarKid. You wanted to have some time alone with Darren on the beach, but hell, be with all of them was amazing. -Alright, try to control yourself, act naturally...-
"Oh my god, is so awesome to meet all of you!" You squealed, standing. - Shit, you asshole. What happened with the part act naturally? - They looked at you amused while Darren raised his eyebrows in surprise.
"Well, yeah. Guys, she's the girl..." Darren started to say to them, grabbing your hand.
"Oh, we know, man. Remember? We met her in the party..." Joe Walker started to say with an amused grin while you blushed a little. Damn, that stupid party when you were drunk. They met you drunk, it was embarrassing. "Yeah, we know her. It's nice to see you again, girl!"
"Yeah, now you'll have the chance to meet me…in a better condition." You said, smiling shyly.
"Oh, don't be so sure about it. Tonight. A bonfire. Music. Alcohol. A huge and totally awesome party. I don't know if any of us is gonna be sober, darling." Jaime said laughing and she did high five with Dylan.
"Oh yeah, you're gonna get to know one of the StarKid ways straight to fun!" Lauren said winking.
"You're gonna have a blast, girl! I can assure it's gonna be one of the funniest nights you'd ever have!" Brian said excited.
"Why that face, Darren?" Julia asked, looking at Darren who was standing behind you with arms crossed and slightly frowning.
"I'm still super mad at y'all. I can't believe you didn't tell me a shit about all of this." Darren said, still with the same expression.
"Oh, c'mon bud. You're here now, right?" Joe Moses said, playfully hitting a punch on Darren's arm.
"Still. I don't get why you didn't tell me a damn shit about this."
"Man, chill out. We…we knew you were with your girl and we didn't want to bug any of you. And maybe because there's a…unwanted guest for you." Joey said.
"What the hell do you mean with unwanted guest? Who else is here?" Darren said looking at Joey suspiciously and a little nervous.
That was an odd situation and you couldn't understand any of that. Darren was looking at Joey straight in the eyes. Joey got nervous all of a sudden. The rest of the guys stayed in silence, watching at Darren and Joey. You also stayed in silence, but only because you didn't understand why all of them changed their faces.
"Uhm… No, no one else is here. It's just… the person is gonna come here at night, you know, for the party. Man, forget about it. We're here to have fun, right?" Joey said, trying to sound relaxed.
"Right. Maybe it wasn't a good idea to come here. We should go." Darren said looking at you and you looked at him surprised, raising your eyebrows. Why the hell was Darren acting like that? Few minutes ago he was happy and now he was in a bad mood.
"Oh dude, that's a shit. Stay at the party, you're gonna get fun. Anyway, have you considered what your girl wants to do?" Dylan said, looking at Darren and you.
"What do you wanna do? Do you want to stay?" Darren said looking at you in the eyes.
"Uhm…uhm, I don't…I don't know. I mean, it'd be fun to have a party but…if you don't want…then. I don't know whatever you want to do." You said nervously.
That was an uncomfortable situation. Everybody was looking at you intently and you really didn't know what to do. Of course you really wanted to be in that party because you were sure you'd have a blast with all of them; but it seemed as if Darren didn't want to be there. Darren kept looking into your eyes for a while until he sighed, looking down.
"Fine, we're staying." Darren finally said.
"Cool, buddy! You won't regret at all!" Meredith said happily.
"I hope so…" Darren said looking at Joey seriously as Joey looked down before smile slightly.
And that was even odder.
It was already night and you all were sitting around a bonfire on the sand, insanely singing and dancing. All of you were already tipsy and no one could stop making jokes and laugh. They've told you that you were going to have a blast, but this was even more than a blast. You never had so much fun in your entire life, they all were so hilarious. Definitely you were happy that Darren finally decided to stay there. Of course it would've been good to stay with him alone, but this was too funny. You thought that you were going to feel uncomfortable with them; because all of them were friends since a long time ago and you just got to meet them, so probably you wouldn't understand their internal jokes and all that. But it was the opposite, they made you feel really included and they didn't stop to tell you funny stories that they all have lived through years. It seemed as if they liked you, and you were happy for that, they were a bunch of awesome people.
At some point of the party, you were dancing insanely with Joey, Lauren and Joe while Darren was singing and playing his guitar, having fun and laughing not only because of the alcohol in your body but because you were dancing in a derp way. When Darren finished singing that song he was playing, a girl who wasn't there before came up to where you all were. You knew who that girl was; you've seen her several times in pictures with them. It was Mia Swier, who was smiling widely. Alright. Something weird happened in that moment. Everybody looked at her with a nervous smile, as if they were happy to have her there with them but at the same time they were... freaking out? Then you looked just where Darren was. He was looking at her with an expression you couldn't find out. He was looking at her as if he were scared, nervous, upset and...sad? Okay, you couldn't understand any of this; you thought you were missing something there. Darren quickly got serious and looked down. Suddenly the party wasn't as funny as it was a few minutes ago.
"Hey guys! Sorry I'm late but finally I'm here! Wow, everybody seems to be tipsy already without me? That's not cool at all. Hey, Brian gimme a slug of that ass whup!" Mia said cheerful and laughing. Then she looked at Darren. "Well, well, look who's here! Mr. Criss it's been a while since the last time we saw each other! You guys didn't tell me he was coming." Mia said and approached Darren to kiss his cheek as Darren looked at her with a very slight smile. He seemed to be uncomfortable. Then Mia looked at you, frowning slightly. "And...You are?"
"She's Darren's girl. A pretty cool girl! Hey, we should sing the coolest girl to her!" Bonnie said excited next to you as everybody cheered in approval as you giggled. "Darren, you know the song, so put your ass there and start playing it!"
Darren nodded with a smile but still a little uncomfortable. Darren was acting in a very odd way and you wondered if you'd done something wrong. Everybody started singing to you as you couldn't stop giggling, and because of the effects of alcohol you stood up to sing with them as they got surprised and started to cheer. Even Darren looked livelier now. The song finished and they approached you to lift you up as you made a gesture of gratitude, laughing. Okay, you were very tipsy but all of them were like you, except for Mia who just had arrived, but she was laughing as well. Then they started to sing again and you sat in the sand again, still giggling. Mia sat next to you and she smiled, looking at you.
"So...you're Darren's girl, right?" Mia said, still smiling while you felt how Darren was staring covertly at where you both were.
"Yeah, I guess so." You said laughing slightly. You had no idea why you were laughing, maybe because of the alcohol.
"Well, it's nice to meet you. I'm Mia." She said, stretching her hand.
"Yes, I know who you are. You're in this band...Shoot the Freak." You said smiling and you stretched your hand to her.
"That's right." Mia said smiling nicely. "Hey, would you mind to go for a walk? Obviously none of them would like to leave the party and I'd really like to walk along the beach. Of course, if you want. No pressure."
"Oh yes, why not? I love walking along the beach." You said amused and you tried to stand up, but oh hell you were really tipsy that you stumbled. Mia laughed slightly and helped you to stand up. "Sorry about that. I guess the alcohol is working."
"Don't worry; in a few minutes I guess I'm gonna be like you." Mia said laughing and grabbed your arm to help you to walk properly as you both went away to walk along the beach. Darren was so focused playing his guitar that he didn't notice you went away with Mia.
You walked along the beach for a while in silence, until you were really far away from that bonfire where everybody was. It was a really nice night and really that walking helped you to get better but anyway you were still a little tipsy. Mia was smiling next to you; apparently she really enjoyed walking along the beach as much as you. You thought that maybe you both could get along well, she seemed very nice to you. Suddenly she stopped and so did you.
"Alright, I think we walked a lot. We really are so far away from that bonfire." Mia said looking at you still smiling.
"Yeah, I think so. Do you want to come back?" You asked politely.
"Oh no, I thought that you and I could talk a little before coming back." Mia said, still smiling and raising an eyebrow.
"Oh well, yes. That seems funny." You said happily.
"So…How did you and Darren meet?" Mia asked looking at you very intently.
"Oh it's really funny, actually!" You said laughing. "We met through letters, long ago."
"Letters?" Mia asked widening her eyes in surprise and laughing.
"Yeah, letters. Crazy, right? Then we started to share a lot of things, until he finally went to NYC, which it's where I'm living right now. We spent an amazing time together, and then I came here to LA because he invited me, you know, for vacation and all that. Darren is a wonderful person. I know, it's crazy and insane all that about the letters and that shit, but somehow we get along so well, more than well I'd say. We're in something like a relationship right now, and it's so crazy because I never thought it could happen, but it just happened and I've never been this happy, you know? Sometimes I think I'm like in a dream, but then there's Darren and I know it's not a dream. It's just so awesome." You said slurred and rambling because of the alcohol.
"Oh, you're in love with him, aren't you?" Mia asked, looking at you very intently.
"Hell yeah. I'm so fucking in love with him." You answered smiling widely.
"Listen to me, bitch." Mia said, getting close to you and facing you. This time she didn't have a smile on her face, she was looking at you with hatred and threateningly. Suddenly you started to feel scared, you didn't know what was happening or why she was looking at you that way if it seemed like she was nice to you. Mia grabbed you by the wrist so hard that it was starting to hurt. "Get your tiny ass away from Darren and stop fucking messing around or my fist is gonna find your motherfucker face of fuckin' junkie. Just to be clear, Darren and I like to fuck each other and you're a stupid naive if you think you have chances with him, I'm just warning you darlin', you're gonna get hurt. So take a long walk off a short pier. Damn, you stink! Go get a life you moron and buzz off."
You stayed looking at her completely scared and astonished as she released your wrist sharply. She went away from there and you just stood there, completely astonished with fear and your body was trembling. You couldn't believe any of this. Why did she treat you like that? Why did she say all of those things? She seemed to be nice and polite, but instead of that she said terrible things to you that hurt you a lot. You even didn't know what you did to have deserved all that. You looked at your wrist. She had nailed her nails on your wrist sharply so now your wrist was bleeding and it was painful. You placed you other hand in your wrist to stop the bleeding and decided to come back to the house to put there some rubbing alcohol. But you didn't even know where you were. You didn't know this place, you were alone and you couldn't remember how you got there because you were so tipsy that you couldn't focus to where you were walking. And everything was so dark and silent. How would you find the way back to the house? Why did you decide to take a walk with a complete strange? But she was friends of Darren so you trusted her. You were huffy, gloomy and startled. But you couldn't stay there, so you started to walk to somewhere that you didn't know. The extremely silence was completely scaring; because at the minimum noise you were startled thinking that there was someone or something. You didn't know this place, you didn't know if there was a safe place or if in any moment a bad person or an animal could appear. But you kept walking. That girl had been so rude with you and you did nothing to her. Was she in love with Darren? She told you that the two of them liked to fuck each other. To fuck were her words. What kind of person was she? Not that you were so naive to think that sometimes people have sex with no feelings involved, but you couldn't imagine Darren being one of those people. Or was he? What if Darren was one of them? What if all this time all that Darren wanted was to get into your pants? No, you were thinking bullshit. Darren had told you that he loved you, and he said it in a very lovely way. He said it open-heartedness, there was sincerity in his eyes when he told you all that. And you trusted him, because he gave you reasons to trust him, because he'd done a lot of things for you without expecting anything in return. You were sure that Darren loved you as much as you loved him, so you wouldn't believe all that shit that a fucking bitch told you. You knew Darren and you didn't know her, so there was no way to trust in her words. You wouldn't let that someone like her screws the moment you were living with Darren. She was just jealous because Darren loved you, a normal and simple girl; instead her, a good-looking woman. You were still walking to somewhere in the dark, trying to find the place where the bonfire was. Then you heard some people singing out loud, so you ran over there, trying to follow the sound of those voices singing. Then you saw the bonfire and all the people there singing and dancing, but you didn't go there, you made your way to the house. You needed to put some rubbing alcohol on your wrist before it gets worse and you weren't really in mood to join them. You just wanted to lie in bed and if you could, to sleep and start a new day. Quickly, you ran to the house and came in. You were in your way to the bedroom you were going to sleep but something made you freeze. You hid behind the door and carefully you poked your head to see what was happening in the kitchen. Mia pulled Darren against the wall and she was pressing her body in his, kissing his neck slowly.
"What the hell are you doing Mia? Get out." Darren said, trying to pull her away, but she pressed Darren against the wall again as she started to lick his neck behind his ear.
"What, Darren? You know that both of us want this. Remember that time in the pool of your parent's house? You could do the same right now and you know you're gonna love it. I know how to make you scream of pleasure." Mia said in Darren's ear seductively. Darren shivered and tried to pull her away again but this time lazily.
"Now everything's different, Mia. So get out of here." Darren said softly, a little upset and a little hoarsely.
"Oh, is that because of that stupid and naive girl? C'mon Darren, she's so innocent. She's never gonna give you all you need, she doesn't know how to turn you on. I bet she totally sucks in bed, she seems so... inexperienced. Instead, I can give you a totally pleasant moment." Mia said, rubbing teasingly Darren's bulge and sucking his neck. Darren let out a moan and this time he didn't try to pull her away.
"Don't talk about her in that way, Mia. She gives me all you didn't. And just to let you know, I love her. What we had was amazing, but there's no us anymore. Just go away." Darren said, panting.
"You really don't want me to go, you love this. Right now you want to fuck me, I know it, Darren. Look at you; I see lust in your eyes. And that girl... she can't give you all of this. And there's no need to be an us, we can be fuck buddies." Mia said still rubbing Darren's bulge and licking his jaw line. Darren closed his eyes and started to moan but anyway trying to pull her away.
"Stop, Mia. Fuck. Stop doing it. I don't want anything with you, not anymore. I got over you, I found someone who worth it." Darren said, upset but naturally enjoying what Mia was doing.
"Oh fuck that stupid girl, Darren! Anyway, if she loved you so much as you say, where the fuck is she now? She vanished since hours. I bet she's fucking Joey right now, I know that what happened in the last party. And you can see that in her eyes, she wants Joey to fuck her. And here we are, the two of us wanting to do a good fuck." Mia licked Darren's lips and she thrust her hips against his, what made Darren groan out loud.
"Fuck off, Mia." Darren said weakly but Mia started to kiss him desperately and Darren tried to pull her away but after a few seconds it seemed that Darren gave up on trying it.
You couldn't stand it anymore. You didn't know what to do, if stop them or run away from there. You were in a rage and extremely sad at the same time. But you couldn't stop them; you wanted to leave that shit place. You were so focused looking at them that you didn't realize that Joey was behind you, completely astonished at what he was seeing and listening, also speechless and unable to move and react. You looked at Joey with tearful eyes and quickly you ran away from there. You ran to the beach, but away from the bonfire where everybody was. You heard some steps running behind you, but you didn't stop until you were far away from that house and that bonfire and you let yourself fall into the sand, sitting there and burying your face in your bended legs, to hide the tears that were running down your face. Those tears were a mix of anger and sadness. Although Darren tried to stop Mia, he didn't try hard enough and you couldn't forget his moans while Mia was touching and kissing him, as if he was really enjoying what she was doing to her. Then when Mia kissed Darren on the mouth, Darren just continued kissing her, he didn't stop her. You trusted Darren and he cheated you. Damn, you weren't even sure if Darren had cheated you because you weren't even boyfriends. You realized that he had never mentioned that you were a couple now; you just were so blinded by your love for him that you made up things that weren't in your head. You thought that you were Darren's girlfriend now, but that was bullshit. Darren never introduced you as his girlfriend and you felt so stupid and naive. How could you think that Darren wanted to be your boyfriend? Of course he didn't want it; otherwise he'd have mentioned it. You knew that Darren loved you, he wasn't lying about it. But he didn't love you the way you thought he loved you. Maybe he just loved you but just as more than friends but less than a girlfriend. He only wanted someone like Mia, who could give him a good fuck as she said, maybe. You weren't sure of anything and everything was just a huge mess. You didn't know if right now you hated yourself or if you hated Darren, but you were sure that you were deeply hurt. It was very hard to see the person you loved with all your heart, making out with another person that minutes before had warned you that something like this could happen. After all, Mia was right. You'd end up being hurt, you were naive, and you should get your ass out of there. But Darren... Darren meant a lot for you and you couldn't let him go away from you, but you needed to let him go away at the same time. You couldn't be with Darren like before after all of this. You were so stupid because over again you were living in a fantasy world. Why did it have to be so hard? Why nothing in your life could work out? It seemed as if just in the exactly time when you were being happy, something bad had to happen to prove you that you'd never get that happiness, and that happy moments weren't meant to exist and last in your life. Why did it have to suck that much? You only wanted a break; you only wanted every pain in your breast to end. You weren't asking that much, you didn't deserve to be this unhappy, or did you? By this time you should have learned not to bump against the wall, but you were still bumping over and over again as if someone had put a blindfold on your eyes that prevented you to see. Over and over again the same mistakes. Darren wasn't guilty anyway; you were the only one to blame because of the fact that you thought you had something special with Darren. You decided to give up on all of this. You needed to start over again and stop suffering for everything. You needed to stay strong and suddenly Chuck's words came up on your mind. – What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. – In fact was like that. This time you weren't going to let things to kill you, you were going to be strong. You needed to get up and carry on by yourself. Think more about yourself and all you wanted to do. You wouldn't let to feel weak for someone else. You were sick of trusting people and end up hurt. You needed to change that and that change was going to start from that moment. You were going to show people that you were strong enough to not let anyone to mess with you or your feelings. You quickly wiped your tears away and from that moment your look turned into an empty look. You heard that the steps that were following you finally approached you and stopped behind you. You knew that person was Joey.
"She was that unwanted guest, wasn't she?" You asked coldly to Joey. Joey stood behind you in silence for some seconds before sitting in the sand next to you.
"Yeah, she was." Joey said softly, looking at the sea.
"Right. It wasn't so hard to guess." You laughed sarcastically.
"Hey, don't believe any of that shit she said. It's pure bullshit. You know that, right?" Joey turned to look at you, but you didn't look at him.
"Yeah, Joey. But I still have eyes and good eyesight. You know that too, right?" You laughed again sarcastically and acidly.
"Listen to me, girl. I don't know what the hell happened there, but I'm sure it was Mia's thing. Darren really loves you the way too much, you know. I've never seen him like this when he's with you, it's like he's another person. But in a good sense. You changed him for good, and it's really nice to see Darren like that. And that only happened with you. Whatever happened in that kitchen, it didn't mean a shit for Darren. He wasn't expecting that, he'd never do something like that to you, Mia was the one who was trying to get into Darren's pants." Joey said, squeezing your hand gently and you let him do that.
"Joey... whether it meant or not a shit for Darren, it meant for me. And don't say that he wouldn't do something like that to me because we both saw he did it. I can look like a very stupid girl, but I'm not that stupid, you know? Anyway, don't worry about this whole shit. After all, Darren and I aren't anything but imaginary letter-friends. Yeah, that's what we are and I'm fine with that." You said bitterly while Joey was looking into your eyes frowning.
"Hey, don't say that! You're not some imaginary letter-friends. Well yeah, you met through letters, but it's different now. I can see in your eyes and in Darren's eyes that you love each other, and I'm not talking about friendship precisely. Darren really loves you, he's like a fool in love when he's around you, and everybody can notice it."
"I don't care. I don't know. I just gave up on trusting people. I'm sick of feeling down all the time, the last I need now it's to be sad for a stupid thing. Really, I got over this. I know Darren's a wonderful person, he really is. But I just made up things in my head and now I have to start thinking more about myself, I need to start respecting myself. Whatever what happened, it's over now. You may or may not like this I'm saying, but I really need to keep going and not let myself to end up hurt again. Sorry Joey, I know you're friends with Darren and it's understandable that you defend him, but try to understand me. Anyway, if you can't understand me, I get it. Just respect my decision, please." You said, this time looking into his eyes, still with that empty look.
"The fact I'm friends with Darren doesn't mean that I approve everything he does. Of course he makes some mistakes; after all he's a human being just like everybody. I guess I understand you, but I cannot tell you that you're taking the right choice. You know, you're still confused for what you've recently seen and you can't think well when you're still confused. Yes, I think you should take a time for yourself right now, but to think about what you really want and what really makes you happy. Because, let's face it, Darren makes you happy just as much as you make him happy. You shouldn't give up on him just because you saw something that actually could have been bullshit. I mean, Mia was pushing him because I know Mia, she's my friend and she's funny and nice and everything, but she's a bitch when she's around Darren. And you saw that too, Darren was trying to stop her. There's a lot you don't know about Darren and Mia and I'm not the person who has to tell you all of this. But Darren was trying to stop her, and you should consider it. And I swear I'm not defending Darren in this moment. It just makes me sad to know that you're giving up on something that to be honest was quite awesome, what you and Darren have. But believe me, I respect you. You're a pretty cool girl and I like you, and I'm not lying about all of this." Joey said, still squeezing your hand. Damn, a tear was running down your face again, it shouldn't be happening. Joey noticed it and gently hugged you; you just weakened and rested your head on his shoulder shedding some tears.
"I'm sorry, I shouldn't be like this. I said to myself that I shouldn't be like this. I'm just confused, and I just want all of this to end. I can't tell you that everything is gonna be the same with Darren, because it was just too much for me, you know? It's really hard for me to trust on people, and I let myself to trust on Darren and then all of this happened. Maybe yes, it's not Darren's fault, maybe it was Mia's fault or maybe it was my fault. What I need now, is to be away, I need my time alone before talking to him. I need to keep myself busy doing other things first, to calm down. And I don't even know how to do it." You said, still sobbing but trying to control yourself.
"Don't feel sorry about this, I got you. If you need that, maybe I can help you. Maybe we could, I don't know, hang out somewhere during all day tomorrow. Then when you're calmed, you can talk to him." Joey said with a comprehensive look.
"Would you really do that for me?"
"Yes, I would. All of this involves me anyway; I was there behind you when everything happened. So, yeah. I would do that. So, tomorrow early in the morning a coffee?"
"I'd like that. But you really don't have to do this, Joey. I'm just a stupid girl..."
"Hey, you're not stupid and I'm doing this because I want, get it?"
"Yeah, thank you Joey. Honestly." You said, smiling slightly.
"Bah, you don't have to thank a shit. By the way, what the hell is that you have on your wrist?" Joey looked at your wrist, a little concerned.
"Oh, it's nothing." You said, hiding it quickly.
"It doesn't look like nothing. What's that?" Joey said, trying to look at your wrist again. "Let me ask you something... when you disappeared all of a sudden, did you go away with Mia?" You only nodded. "Yeah, I got it. Did she say something bad to you?"
"Sort of... but it was nothing. It's over now."
"What the fuck did she say? Has she threatened you?" Joey asked worried.
"Joey, really. It doesn't matter what she did or what she didn't. It's in the past."
"She made you that thing on your wrist, right? She hurt you, didn't she?" You just looked down and didn't answer. "That bitch. Okay, that's it." Joey said getting angry and he stood up, but you grabbed his hand to stop him.
"Wait...what are you doing, Joey?"
"I'm gonna tell her to stop fucking messing around. Gee, she hurt you! She really crossed the line this time." Joey said, still upset.
"Don't do it. Please, promise me you won't do it. You won't tell anything to anybody all of this. Neither what happened between Mia and I nor what we just have talked. Please, Joey." You begged him, looking into his eyes.
"But this cannot continue."
"Please, Joey..." you begged him again. Joey looked at you and sighed.
"Fine, I promise. But if something else happens..."
"If something else happens, you can show up all your badass spirit." You said grinning slightly and Joey laughed, grabbing you hand to help you stand up.
"That's what I call a deal. We should go to get some sleep. It's been a long day and tomorrow early in the morning we have to take a coffee."
"Yeah, that's right. Let's go."
You walked to the house again. You were scared to find Darren and Mia again, but when you arrived there, everything was quiet. Maybe they were together in the bedroom, you didn't want to go to the bedroom where you were supposed to sleep with Darren, and you didn't want to see if he was there with Mia. It seemed that Joey realized what you were feeling, so he just told you that maybe you should go to sleep on the couch and you agreed. That night you barely could sleep because your mind kept busy thinking about everything that happened and you were attentive if you get to hear some noise coming from Darren's bedroom.
Next morning, Joey woke you up really early in the morning. No one was awake of course, it was around 6am. You guessed that Joey had found out your intention that you wanted to leave the house for the rest of the day, not letting anyone to know that you were going out. Everything was silent and around the house there were empty alcohol bottles everywhere, the house was an entire mess. Joey started to raise a few empty bottles on the floor to put on top of a table, while you went to the bathroom to wet your face and brush your teeth. You thought that your head was about to explode, it hurt so much probably because a hangover and because you didn't get so much sleep because you stayed thinking and crying all night long. Anyway, this was a new day, just as you wanted. You weren't going to feel down and blue, you've taken that decision. Is what you needed if you wanted to face Darren at night. This time, you weren't going to let that stupid feelings will weaken you; you were going to stay firmly and finally respect yourself. You weren't going to let someone to play with you and your feelings. Maybe you had a rude attitude, but you were tired to suffer. It was as if what you saw yesterday was the straw that broke the camel's back. You didn't even know if you were doing the right thing with Joey because, after all, Joey was Darren's bestie, and you were just a half-stranger for him. You weren't sure to trust him, you weren't sure if Joey would run to tell Darren everything you told him last night, after all it wouldn't be weird if he does it. Maybe the best thing would be not to talk to him about Darren that day. It was just weird that Joey offered to help you with that situation; you started to think that maybe he wanted to get information about what you felt for Darren, so definitely you weren't going to talk about Darren. You just were going to hang out with him and spend the day doing shopping or something. But, on the other hand, Joey was really nice to you last night, as if really cared about you. Maybe he just was trying to be nice to you because you meant...something to Darren and he was doing all of this only because for Darren. But you weren't sure anymore if you meant something to Darren. You remembered all that Darren said to you a few days ago, all that words that made you feel loved and as if he really was in love with you. You didn't know what to think about all that anymore. Maybe Darren felt something for you, but he was just really confused and when Mia returned into his life, everything changed for him. As if he never was able to get over Mia. Well, if thing were like that, you needed to keep it in mind, to start thinking that probably you won't get any chance with Darren as Mia said. You needed to be ready to expect an answer for Darren that probably you won't like, you needed to expect the worst thing that could happen which was losing Darren. So from that moment, you were going to try to get over him and start to think what you were going to do without him. It couldn't be that hard, but actually was. You still loved Darren, no matter what happened last night with Mia. You did really loved him, but if he didn't love you back, you couldn't do anything and even though it'd hurt deep in the soul, you were going to have to get away from Darren. That was what you needed to do, so you just went out the bathroom and walked over the living room where Joey was waiting for you.
"Ready to go? You look terrible, maybe that coffee is gonna help you." Joey said looking at your haggard face.
"Oh well, how cute you are, Joey! Nothing better than wake up with a hangover and someone telling you that you look undoubtedly like shit." You said, raising an eyebrow and chuckling.
"Forever saying the crude reality." Joey said laughing and he started to walk to the front door. "C'mon, we have to do a lot today to kick your shitty mood away from you."
"That sounds like a perfect plan." You said before you left the house.
You walked for a long, talking quietly and joking in your way to some coffee shop. You had no idea where you were going, so you just followed Joey. Almost nobody was walking down the street at this time and you thought that maybe the coffee shop was going to be closed because it was 7am. But when you arrived it was surprisingly open. You came in and ordered your coffee to then sit on a table. Although Joey was trying to make you feel comfortable, you couldn't feel that way. You had no idea what to talk about so you were feeling a little uncomfortable. You both were in silence for a while, just drinking your coffee.
"So, how are you feeling today so far?" Joey asked, taking a sip of his coffee.
"Better I guess, if you don't count the dinosaur who decided to live in my head and yell and jump inside." You said, smiling slightly.
"That dinosaur is called hangover. He's my friend sometimes; we get along well although sometimes he's such a pain in the ass." Joey said amusingly. "Take this." Joey searched something in his pocket and gave it to you. "Tylenol. Best friend of the people who are feeling miserable after a belligerent drinking night."
"Oh thank you, I'm broken. I was so annihilated last night that I'm impressed that I haven't passed out in a dumpster. Really, I got totally battered last night, such a shame." You said grabbing the Tylenol.
"Well, we all got totally blitzed. I mean, we've been boozing since afternoon during all night long. Anyway, that party was very crunk, despite the way it ended." Joey said laughing, apparently remembering some funny things. "You even sang, you fucking sang! That was totally awesome."
"Oh yeah, crap. I'm not doing it anymore. Why was I singing the coolest girl anyway?" You started to laugh out loud.
"Because you're the coolest girl, I think Bonnie said that when Mia... when she said you were Darren's girl...uhm, yeah something like that." Joey said a little nervous but then he smiled widely. "Actually I have no idea, but it was a kick!"
"Yeah." You said, looking down and taking a sip of coffee.
There was it. Again, an awkward silence that lasted several minutes. Shit, that was really uncomfortable, and you were having a good time before Joey mentioned Mia and the fact you were Darren's girl. Well, obviously it wasn't like that after you saw Darren and Mia in the kitchen. Oh damn, again you started to remember them, the way Mia was touching and licking his neck, the way Darren was moaning, when they finally kissed. And again you started to imagine what happened after you ran away from there. Apparently you were frowning and you had a bitter expression on your face, because Joey broke the silence.
"I may know what you're thinking right now. You wouldn't know what happened after that if you don't talk to Darren."
"Oh wow, I didn't know you had the power to sneak in my head." You laughed bitterly. "Yeah, I guess I should do that. But you know? I'm not sure if I'm gonna believe all he has to tell me after I ask him what happened."
"You wouldn't know." Joey said, shrugging. "I could tell you that Darren is the most honest person I know, but probably you won't believe me because I'm his friend."
"Yeah, exactly." You laughed a little sardonically.
"I hope you don't take this wrong or that you consider me intrusive. But that's not cool at all. It's not cool to see you giving up on trusting people. Yeah, I get that throughout your life people have disappointed you, but it always happen. We all have been there..."
"You have no idea what I went through." You interrupted Joey sharply and coldly.
"I might not know what you've been through, yeah. But I know what you're feeling right now. People threw me shit several times, maybe not in the same way than you. But the feeling is the same. And if I could give you an advice, I'd tell you that whatever happens to you, you never have to give up. Yeah, surely it's gonna be hard to trust someone again, but there's always cool people that it's not gonna let you down. But if you give up on trusting, you'll never know that. And if they keep letting you down, there's always people who are gonna help you to go on." Joey said, sincerely looking into your eyes while you just were looking at your lap. He was right, but you couldn't do it.
"You said that, Joey. It's gonna be hard and honestly I can't do it right now. I'm gonna keep it in mind, anyway. Yeah, maybe there are still cool people." You said a little incredulous.
"Trust me. There is. And I don't know so much about you but what I know about you so far is that a person like you shouldn't be feeling this way. You're young and you have a lot to live for to be feeling so hopeless. Again, I don't know what happened in your life neither what you've been through, but nothing is lost. And if you ever feel down, here's a dumb human being who's here if you need to talk or shit. Forget that I'm Darren's friend and all that, I like you so...I could call you my friend too." Joey said with a slight smile.
"Thank you, Joey." You said smiling slightly, but still a little suspicious.
"You can trust me, you know that right?"
"I don't know if I can do it, honestly."
"Well, right. Don't worry, my lips are sealed and I ain't telling all of this to anyone. Be sure about that. Aaaaaand, to prove you I'm being honest... if i say something, you can spit out a very secretly secret about me that I'm gonna tell you now." Joey said, looking at you mysteriously and that really made you laugh.
"Bring it on!" You giggled more lively.
Joey told you a secret about a very embarrassing moment he had once in his life that he never told anyone. Actually it was pretty funny, but yes it was embarrassing. You sealed the promise to not tell anything in that moment. You weren't supposed to feel in this way, but you started to trust on Joey even if he was Darren's best friend. You just felt comfortable with him, and he was trying to make you feel better whatever his reasons were. He really had no need to do all of this, but he was doing it; and you were thankful for this.
You spent all the day long with Joey, having so much fun, doing some shopping and eating like two pigs. Definitely, your mood got better than the way you were feeling that morning. But finally it was late at night, and you had to come back at the house you were staying. And you really didn't want to come back because you knew what it meant. You knew that it was time to talk with Darren, because probably Darren had been wondering where you'd been all this time. And you really weren't ready to talk to him. You were scared, nervous, upset and sad. You really wanted to run away when you and Joey were walking back to the house. Your body started to shiver and this wasn't unnoticed by Joey. He gently squeezed your shoulder and smiled at you.
"Don't be nervous. Everything's gonna be alright. And if everything goes to hell, I'm gonna be there. Cool off." Joey said mildly and you just nodded, still freaking out though.
When you arrived to the house, you stood in front the front door and took a long breath before come in. There was nobody there, the lights were out and there were neither noises nor sounds. It was really weird. Joey was amazed also and he turned on the light.
"Maybe they're at the beach, partying again." Joey said to you.
"Who's there? Joey is that you?" Darren's voice echoed in the room and you got extremely nervous all of a sudden again.
"Yeah...yes, it's me Darren. Where are you?" Joey answered aloud.
"Over here, in the music room. Where have you been?" Darren said, popping up in the room where you and Joey were.
In that moment, a lot of things happened in matter of a second. Darren was frowning with an intrigued look before he saw Joey and you standing next to each other. As soon as he saw you both, Darren's face turned into an angry and confused face, looking at you both coldly. You freaked out and got even more nervous, your body trembling senseless. Joey, who was relaxed, got a bit edgy when he saw Darren's expression. The awkward and very tense situation lasted a few seconds until Joey broke it.
"Hey, bud. What's up? Where's everybody?" Joey tried to say nicely.
"At the beach." Darren answered shortly and coldly, still staring at you both with anger.
"Oh cool, another party? And, why are you here instead with them?" Joey said again, obviously uncomfortable by the way Darren was answering.
"Reasons." Darren answered again coldly, this time looking at you straight in the eye. You just looked down to avoid his gaze, remaining in silence.
"Bud, i know what you're thinking and none of what you're thinking has happened." Joey said, trying to end the tense situation.
"You wouldn't know what I'm thinking. I'd really appreciate if you go away right now Joey. I need to talk with some girl here." Darren said coldly, still staring at you.
"Uhm, yeah sure." Joey said uncomfortably and then he looked at you. "If you need me, I'm gonna be out there at the beach." Joey said softly to you.
"Unbelievable!" Darren laughed sarcastically and bitterly, what made you both look at him.
"You're not getting this, Darren. I'm gonna leave you both alone now." Joey said, sighing and shaking his head. He started to walk away and he stopped to say something to Darren before leaving. "Don't be such an asshole and listen what she has to tell you, Darren."
"Get your ass out of here now, Joey." Darren said, ignoring what Joey said to him. Joey shook his head again and finally left.
You looked at Darren a little nervous once you got alone. It wasn't supposed that you were feeling nervous; after all you'd decided that you needed to keep strong, yet when you saw Darren you forgot all of that. Darren seemed really angry and he was being very cold and rude and that made you feel bad. After all, you still loved Darren and seeing him acting like this broke your heart. You didn't like this situation, and if he continued being like that, nothing could end in a good way. A few days ago you were very happy, teasing each other, kissing and cuddling; and now you were going through a really bad moment. How has that even happened? Then you remembered why you were there, you remembered why you avoided Darren all this time. Your nervous look turned into an empty and cold look, that apparently Darren noticed because he grimaced before looking at you coldly again, coming closer to where you were. This time you weren't looking down; this time you were looking into his eyes roughly.
"Funny how things work." Darren said coldly, seven inches from your face. "Funny how someone can be worried and meanwhile other one can be having a blast."
"Pretty funny, I'd say." You answered to Darren as coldly as he talked to you.
"I was all day thinking about you." Darren continued saying, ignoring your comment. "Last night I went to sleep wondering where you could be, I thought that maybe you took a walk since you love the beach. This morning I woke up and you weren't there. Maybe she left a note, I thought. I looked for something and I didn't find a shit. I looked for you around the entire house and on the beach, you were nowhere. I started to freak out, maybe you got lost or something bad happened to you, because you were a little drunk last night. I asked everybody if they knew where you were, no one could tell me a fucking thing. Oh look! Joey wasn't here either! How interesting." Darren said sarcastically and laughing bitterly. You stayed silent, still staring at him coldly. "Yeah, you definitely were together. I tried to not think up shit in my mind. So I just decided to wait for you, sooner or later you were going to come back. I stayed in the music room all day, thinking about you, worried about you. It was late and you weren't coming back. Then, suddenly, i heard how the front door opened and i stayed silent trying to figure out who just arrived. I heard Joey's voice talking to someone. Yeah, I decided to walk towards he was. Oh, well, well, look who is here with him! The mysterious girl! That's quite intriguing. But I said to myself that I needed to control myself, maybe you both only hung out. Hey, listen what Joey is telling her! He's gonna be there if that girl needs him. Very adorable" Darren said, blinking exaggeratedly yet sarcastically, while you looked at him incredulous. "Is there something you wanna tell me?"
"Oh yes. I was with Joey all day and we had fun." You looked at him defiantly as Darren came closer to you and he squeezed your wrist strongly just where Mia hurt you last night. It was really painful. "Darren you're hurting me." You said with a grimace of pain, but Darren didn't let your wrist, but he softened the squeeze.
"Tell me something... How many times have you fucked Joey? Was it good?" Darren asked you in anger, squeezing your wrist stronger.
"You're hurting me, Darren!" You yelled and Darren let your wrist, but still looking at you in a rage. "If you call go out for a coffee fuck, then two times today. And yes, it felt good." You said coldly.
"Yeah, sure you went out for a coffee all day long!" Darren laughed bitterly.
"Well yeah, I'd rather to go out for a coffee with someone than make a good fuck in the kitchen." You yelled angrily.
Darren suddenly looked at you in horror as you stared at him coldly. He gulped and his body started to shake lightly, as you started to smile bitterly nodding your head. Now Darren was the one, who was nervous, and his reaction made you feel sad but you didn't show it. If he was nervous, it meant that something else has happened before you ran away that night. You wanted to cry and you started to feel that damn lump in throat, but you needed to stay strong, you needed to stand firm. Instead crying you looked at Darren disappointed and coldly, frowning and biting your lips.
"Yeah, I saw it all last night. It was a blast, I'm sure." You said, letdown.
"I don't know what you are..."
"Don't fucking play dumb with me Darren. I'm sick of all of this, I'm sick of people treating me as if I were a jerk." You yelled angrily again and Darren freaked out, looking at you desperate and edgy.
"No, you got everything wrong...it...it wasn't like that...I...no, listen..." Darren stammered nervous.
"No, you fucking listen to me. I listened everything you had to say; now at least respect me and listen all I have to say." You said threateningly, looking straight in his eye. Darren remained silent still jittery. "Yesterday night, Mia and I had a little... talk. Oh yeah, she's adorable in front of everybody! The nicest girl in the entire world. So yeah, why wouldn't I go for a walk with her? Then she took me to somewhere, i didn't fucking know where we were. And suddenly the nicest girl in the entire earth wasn't so nice. Oh no, she said a lot of shit..."
"Wait...what did she say?" Darren asked scared and you looked at him coldly.
"I'd appreciate if you don't interrupt me while I'm talking." You said sharply and Darren stayed silent yet scared. "Yes, she told me some things, as I was a stupid girl that is blinded to see that you and she have everything I can't give you..."
"No, that's not..."
"Shut up, Darren!" You yelled angrily and he looked down, biting his lower lip. "I didn't believe a shit what she told me. I knew you, and I didn't know a damn shit about her. So why would I believe what she was telling me? She left me there, I didn't know where the hell I was, and I didn't know how to come back. But after an hour I found the way and I came into the house. I needed to get some rubbing alcohol to put on my wrist, because oh, the nicest girl hurt me." You showed to Darren your wrist and he looked at it astonished.
"Did she...?" Darren said somewhat angry and concerned.
"Yeah, she did. But it's not the point so please; let me continue saying all i have to say to you." You said coldly and frowning. "As I said, I didn't believe a shit of everything she told me. But then I went to the kitchen, and there you were. She was pressing her body against yours, she was kissing and touching you, well yes you tried to stop her..."
"For god sake, Darren! Shut up your mouth and let me finish! I respected you, and the only thing I'm asking you is you to respect me as well." You said in a rage. "Yes, you tried to stop her, but she wasn't giving up. Then I saw how she started to touch you...to touch your crotch and...Your dick. Yeah, I saw it all, and I heard it all. I heard how you were moaning in pleasure. You couldn't stop her anymore, because obviously you were loving that. Then she kissed you, more like she put her tongue deep in your throat. And then you kissed her back. Don't deny it because if there's something good on me, that's my eyesight. Yeah, I trusted you, I didn't believe her. But after all she was right. She was fucking right. I tried to run away, I couldn't stand it a second longer. I turned around to go away, and surprisingly Joey was there too, looking everything, also astonished of what he saw. I ran far away, Joey followed me. Joey tried to calm me down while you were there, enjoying your time with Mia. I don't have any idea what you did after I left and i really don't wanna know right now. All I know is that if it wasn't for Joey, I wouldn't be here talking to you about all of this. I wanted to go away, to come back where I belong. But Joey told me that I should talk to you first, that we needed to clear up all of this. I wasn't ready to talk to you, I was deeply hurt. I needed time to think about all of this, so Joey helped me, because he knew I needed someone in that moment, and I had no one, you obviously didn't care and i was alone. But Joey was there, and he helped me when I needed the most. We left the house early in the morning for a coffee and he tried to make me feel good again, so I could talk to you this night. He tried to calm me, so he kept my mind busy doing shopping and shit like that. So yeah, if you call fuck the action to get a coffee, then I fucked Joey." You couldn't talk anymore because the lump in throat appeared again.
"I...I didn't mean to say that...all that you fucked Joey, I...I was just upset, I...it wasn't my intention." Darren said with guilt and tearful voice. "Listen...it's not what you're thinking...Mia and I...we didn't..."
"Stop, Darren." You said, trying to hold back your tears, you needed to be strong. "All of this made me realize that I need to start thinking more about myself, I need to start respecting myself. It made me realize that I don't have to let anyone to play neither with me nor my feelings. I trusted you so much, because yes, I still love you. But it got me nowhere but hurting myself. I'm sorry, but I can't trust you any longer. I...I thought we had something. But obviously I was wrong. You never mentioned we had something and I made up things in my mind, as a stupid girl as I am, just what Mia said. I was blinded by my love for you that I didn't notice that you weren't feeling the same for me, that you were still in love with someone else. And that's it. I'm not gonna be the same stupid girl who lets everybody tramples on her head. Maybe it sounds selfish, but I'm sick of suffering all the time, I need to change that. I'm gonna think of myself and I won't let anybody to let me down again. And if this requires me to start acting more rudely, that's what I'll do. But I won't shed another fucking tear again." You said, with an empty look while Darren was looking at you sadly.
"No, please. I'm really sorry. Don't...don't feel that way." Darren said again with tearful voice and he sighed. "I...I don't think you're stupid, and I don't think you should change yourself. You're just perfect the way you are. I'm not against you thinking about yourself, but I don't think you should...you should give up on people. I know... I made a mistake. But I'm really sorry, and you...you really don't know what really happened, all that happened between me and Mia. And we have something, we really have something. And please believe me when I tell you that I love you, I really do. What happened yesterday..."
"Sorry, Darren. I don't believe you, I can't believe you. I can't trust you any longer, I'm sorry. And no, we don't have anything, we never had. Otherwise, none of that would've happened. I'm not blaming you; you had your reasons to do what you did. And if that is what you want, I can't be against it; if that is what you want, I have nothing to do here. I understand, and you try to understand me. It's the only thing I'm asking you to do for me, I don't expect anything more than that from you. And I don't think you're a bad person, if that's what worries you. I think you're a wonderful person, because you really are. The only thing I think it's that whatever I thought we could have, it's not gonna work. And if it's not gonna work, I can't let myself to end up hurt so I need to go away from here. I honestly want that everything works for you in whatever you decide to do. But don't ask me to believe you, because I can't."
"Please, don't do this. You need... you need to know everything." Darren said desperate, grabbing your hands gently.
"I really don't have to know anything. You don't have to give me any explanation." You said looking down as Darren looked deeply into your eyes, still holding your hands.
"I need to give you an explanation because I love you and I don't wanna lose you. I need to explain you everything that happened between Mia and I, and I'm not talking only about what happened yesterday, I'm talking about what happened since the first time I met her. You may not like what I have to say, but I need to tell you and you need to listen to me."