Chapter 9: How to Get Your Mojo Back
Cas pulled on an old shirt of Dean’s as he followed Dean through the door way to the foyer of the bunker. Dean promised to wash his trench coat, jacket, and shirt of blood. “Sit here,” Sam instructed pointing to a chair he had set up for Cas to sit in as the process took place. Cas made his way to the chair and sat down trying to get comfy.
“Okay so how exactly does this work?” Crowley asked holding up the small jar of grace. “Do we spoon feed it to you?”
“No,” Cas turned to Sam and Dean. “Do you remember when Anna got her grace back?”
“Um… yeah she smashed it on the ground and it just sort of went back into her, and then she exploded…” Sam replied.
“Yes we need to make sure I don’t do that…” Cas said and then pressed his lips together. “I could absorb the grace I stole so easily because it wasn’t my grace. Each angel’s grace is unique to them and is really powerful, so since we’re dealing with my unique grace we’ll have to be delicate. Anna exploded because instead of giving her vessel time to adjust to her grace she absorbed it all at once and her vessel couldn’t handle it. Plus instead of letting it in through her vessel she let it in through her soul, which just made more complications for her vessel. Sure she was able to restore it after a while but it takes too much time to restore a torn up vessel.”
“Cas oh really, how many times are you gonna say ‘vessel’? You’ve said it so many times now it doesn’t even sound like the word,” Crowley teased annoyed.
“I’m just trying to be delicate,” Cas said looking annoyed at Crowley. “Something you’re not so skilled at.” Dean smiled at Cas’ sass.
“Excuse me you’re no flower either Cassie!” Crowley said smugly.
“Guys stop!” Dean said with a sigh. He turned to Cas and couldn’t help but smile. “So how do we do this then? You know? Without the big kaboom!?”
“Do you have an I.V. bag and needles?” Cas asked.
“Yes actually,” Sam answered sauntering off into another room.
“Once Sam comes back extract the grace with the needle and squeeze it into the bag,” Cas instructed.
“This is so great! I’m so happy you’re getting your grace back Cas,” Dean smiled grabbing Cas’ hand and stroking his hair.
“Did I miss something?” Crowley asked with a curious smile creeping on his lips. “I mean Cas why are you wearing that horrid shirt and not your horrid trench coat?”
“I had him take his shirt off to clean his wound, and he needed a shirt to wear while his is being cleaned,” Dean said a tad embarrassed.
A certain smile sat on Crowley’s face now. “Oh I see,” he snickered swirling a drink he made appear in his hand. He took a sip.
“I also told Dean I loved him and he told me he loved me back,” Cas said with a satisfied face. Dean’s face blushed bright red, and he looked up at Crowley sheepishly.
Crowley was nearly choking on his drink. He swallowed thickly and laughed. “Mazel tov!” He clapped his hand on Dean’s back and laughed.
Sam walked in with and I.V. bag. “Okay here you go,” He handed the bag to Dean.
Dean did as Cas said and sucked the grace out of the jar with the needle and put it in the bag. He watched the blue light swirl around in the bag. “Okay now what?”
“Now,” Cas said grabbing the needled hose of the I.V. bag and stuck it in his arm. “We start the process…” he turned flipped the switch on the hose and the grace slowly started to leak into his arm. As it entered into his body his veins around the entrance turned bright blue. Cas smiled. “Hopefully this works.”
“Hopefully?” Dean asked alarmed at Cas’ words. “What are you saying this might not work?”
“No it’ll work, I just don’t know the outcome… I should be fine,” Cas explained.
“Should be?” Dean panicked preparing to pull the tube out of Cas’ arm.
“I’ve never done this Dean. Every angel reacts differently to the process,” Cas reassured. “This is the safest way I’ll be fine.”
Dean smiled and kissed Cas’ forehead, and rubbed his thumb over Cas’ cheek. “Okay.” Cas leaned into Dean’s touch and hummed.
Sam looked at Crowley surprised by his brother’s actions. Yes, he knew Dean was more passionate about Cas but kissing his forehead? “What is going on?” he mouthed at Crowley.
“Oh they finally said it…” Crowley smiled lifting his cup up at Dean and Cas.
“What guys that is great!” Sam nearly yelled ecstatic. He walked over and hugged Dean and Cas from behind. “Congrats!”
“Thanks,” Cas said out of breath from Sam’s bear hug.
“Hey uh, moose?” Crowley called.
“Yeah? What’s up Crowley?” Sam answered looking up smiling about his big brother and Cas.
“Could I talk to you for a minute?” Crowley asked gesturing at the hallway with his head.
“Um… yeah. I guess,” Sam said curiously following Crowley into the hallway.
Dean followed them with his eyes on their way out but decided to stay with Cas.
Out in the hall Sam and Crowley had walked quite a ways before Sam broke the tension. “Okay, Crowley what do you want to talk about?” Sam stopped him pulling by his shoulder to face him.
“I don’t want to talk,” Crowley sighed and looked up at Sam embarrassed. “I need to ask you a favor…”
“Okay what? And I’m telling you now, if it’s stupid I’m not doing it,” Sam smiled crossing his arms. Crowley was quiet. “What could you possibly want Crowley?”
“Okay moose I feel like we’re close right?”
“Not how I’d put it,” Sam squinted his eyes annoyed.
“I need your… blood,” Crowley sighed regretting his request a bit.
“Why do you need my blood? Why would I give you my blood? No, you’re not using my blood to make any phone calls…” Sam scolded angrily at Crowley.
“Um… no. I just, moose I need a fix!” Crowley pleaded.
“You need a fix? Why use my blood? Why not go out and get someone else? You’re not bound to us anymore! We’re not keeping you hostage!” Sam explained raising his voice a little.
“Moose you don’t understand. I need your blood. I get the best high with your blood,” Crowley admitted ashamed.
“High? I’m not a big bag of weed Crowley!”
“No, I know just please, moose just one dose!” Crowley pleaded with his hands pressed together.
Sam rolled his eyes and sighed. “One dose,” Sam sighed giving Crowley a stern look.
Crowley smiled excited and pulled out a rather large syringe. “Thank you moose!”
“Jesus you brought a syringe?” Sam asked appalled.
“Well I knew you’d say yes,” Crowley smiled holding out the syringe.
Sam took it hesitantly and sighed pricking his arm and drawing some blood. “Why couldn’t we do it out there?”
“What while they’re all being mushy gushy? No thank you!” Crowley said grabbing the syringe full of blood from Sam. “Plus it’s rude to shoot up in front of people. Off you pop.” He smiled gesturing with his head for Sam to leave.
“I’m not going to give you a ‘fix’ every time you ask!” Sam said matter-of-factly.
Sam walked back to the foyer to join with Cas and Dean. When he walked in Dean had pulled over a chair and they were chatting softly. “Hey guys,” he greeted clearing his throat to draw attention.
“Hey Sammy,” Dean smiled at Sam. “Did Crowley ask you for blood?”
“How did you…” Sam started.
“He’s done nothing but talk about it since he started up again…” Dean explained. “It’s a bit creepy.”
“Yeah it is,” Sam laughed pulling up a chair next to Cas.
“Did you give him any?” Dean asked.
“Yeah,” Sam exhaled scratching the back of his neck.
“Good. I know a person getting high isn’t usually looked upon as a good thing, but hey I think it’s doing him good,” Dean shrugged.
“ Really?” Sam crossed his arms surprised.
“Yeah, why do you sound so shocked?” Dean sat back.
“Nothing I just would have thought you… now like this, would want Crowley… not humany,” Sam said slowly.
“Sammy come on I’m still me,” Dean sighed. “I not pro demon just because I am one.”
“Oh,” Sam smiled turning to Cas. “So how you doin’ there Cas?”
“Well this process isn’t the most comfortable process but I’m…” Cas stopped and started breathing heavily.
“Cas?” Dean asked grabbing the side of his face pulling it close to him.
“I’m fine…” Cas breathed. “I’m…” Cas screamed in pain arching his back from the seat.
“Hey… hey Cas,” Dean called searching around hoping an answer would just pop up. Sam held on to Cas’ arm with the needle in it and watched the last of the grace drip into his arm. Sam pulled the needle out and helped hold Cas down as he screamed in agony and tossed about.
“Crowley!” Dean called and Crowley popped next to Dean instantly responding to Cas.
“Let him up!” Crowley instructed pulling Sam and Dean off of him.
Cas fell to the floor on his knees still shouting out. Dean dashed forward to grab Cas but Crowley caught him pulling him back. “Cas! Please oh damn! Crowley do something!”
“Give him a second Dean!” Crowley struggled trying to hold Dean back.
Suddenly Cas stopped screaming and stood up holding his sides. “Cas are you okay?” Dean called.
“Dean I’m…” Cas’ body crumbled and Cas was back on his knees. With one final scream Cas opened his arms and bright blue light shot from his eyes and mouth. All the lights in the bunker flickered uncontrollably and a shadowed pair of broken wings appeared raising on the back wall. Shadowed feathers fell from the wings floating down like leafs from an autumn tree.
Suddenly all the lights went out and everything was silent. After a few seconds that felt like hours the backup generator for the bunkers power started to roar and the lights came back on. Dean’s eyes found Cas laid out limp on the floor. Dean was still. He couldn’t breathe. He was afraid of moving because if he did that time would pass on and he might found out Cas was limp because he was… the word hurt in his mind.
“Cas?” Sam asked hoping for an answer.
“Cas?” Dean called taking a step closer. “C-Cas?”
Dean looked worriedly at Sam. Sam shared a worried look back. “Do you think it…um,” Sam started but stopped.
Dean just slowly walked over to Cas and kneeled. Dean lifted his hanging head to look at Crowley. To Dean his head felt like ten tons. “Is he okay?”
Crowley took a few steps towards Dean and Cas and spied upon the limp body. “Dean, I’m sorry I don’t know…” It felt like it took years to say the words.
“You don’t know?” Dean laughed a bit picking put Cas’ head and resting it on his lap. “Oh great the king of freaking hell doesn’t know!” Dean yelled his voice cracking tears building up in his eyes. He looked back down at Cas. Cas wasn’t breathing and Dean couldn’t find a pulse as he tugged at his wrist. “Cas you promised me you’d never do this to me again! You promised!” Dean growled through his teeth letting the tears start to flow. He started to rock back and forth holding Cas in his arms. “Come on buddy… don’t do this to me…. I need you! I love you!” Dean laughed. “Remember Cas? I love you! I love you!”
Sam walked up behind Dean and put his hand on Dean’s shoulder. “Dean I’m sorry,” Sam said, despair filled his voice.
“He can’t do this to me Sammy… he promised,” Dean cried through his teeth.
“Dean look,” Crowley started.
“Bring him back?” Dean asked innocently looking up at Crowley. “You can do that right?” Dean said resting Cas on the floor and standing up leaning closer to Crowley. He could feel the heat from the mark on his arm sky rocket into pain and saw the black tint blur his vision.
“Dean I can’t,” Crowley sighed on the verge of crying himself. “I really wish I could… I’d give anything! But I can’t bring back angels.”
“Then give it to me!” Dean yelled holding out his hand.
“Dean lets think rationally,” Crowley held up his hands defensively, backing up.
“I won’t ask again…” Dean’s eyes narrowed.
“Give it to him,” Sam whispered regrettably. He couldn’t believe the words had waltzed out of his mouth.
Crowley looked worriedly at Sam and then back at Dean. He pulled the first blade out of his jacket pocket hesitantly and Dean snatched it instantly. He let the energy run through him. Let the pain become pleasure. “Dean you don’t have to do this…” Crowley mumbled lowly.
“I do,” Dean nodded. “I really do and no one is going to stand in my way!” He let his mind run free, letting it throw Crowley across the room through a table into a book shelf. He turned to Sammy and smiled as he let his mind slam Sam into the cinder block wall.
Suddenly Dean was gone. Sam came out of his daze and ran towards Crowley. “I can’t believe we just let him go like that!” Sam said wanting to shoot himself in the foot.
“Oh god moose!” Crowley yelled. “He would have killed us if we hadn’t let him go!”
“God damn it!” Sam yelled sliding his hands across a table covered in books letting them all fly onto the floor. “What the hell are we supposed to…”
A loud sound like a sharp intake of air came from the other side of the room. Sam and Crowley looked at each other horrified. They waited for a sound and again they heard a loud pained moan. “Cas?” they called running over to him.
Sam sat Cas up on his side. “Oh my god you’re alive!”
Cas coughed and then straightened up confused and dazed. “Um… yeah… I think so. I said I’d be okay didn’t I?” He looked around and made eye contact with Crowley, who was staring wide eyed for a second and then turned to Sam. “What happened here? Where is Dean?”
“We need to stop him,” Sam said immediately staring up at Crowley.
“Oh we’re in for one hell of a storm!” Crowley responded with a nod.
“What are you talking about?” Cas asked confused.
“We made a mistake,” Sam yelled panicked.