Kid's Trip to CarnEvil

Rickety Town

Kid groaned as he awoke. Liz and Patty were looking down on him with worried expressions on their faces. Kid sat up and slowly got to his feet before looking around, finding that they were back at the Shooting Gallery.

"How did we get back here?" Kid asked the two of them.

"We were teleported back here after we collected Evil Marie's soul," Liz explained as they brushed off Kid.

"Yeah, it tasted a little spicy," Patty joked, but neither Liz nor Kid looked amused.

"I see; well then I guess we should move on to the next…attraction," Kid said with clear disdain in his tone.

"Don't you think we should rest? Especially after that beating you took..." Liz suggested.

"No, we need to keep moving. Besides, I should be fine; I've rested up, and I should be sharper than ever," Kid declared.

"If you say so," Liz said before she and Patty transformed back into weapons, returning to Kid.

Kid approached the Shooting Gallery once more, the curtain rising to reveal that the Haunted House has disappeared from the lineup which left Rickety Town and the Freak Show.

"I guess we'll go to Rickety Town next for consistency's sake," Kid said. He cocked one of the guns and shot shooting the small spinning Ferris wheel.


The group found themselves floating in the purple and black spiral void again; the jester's skull returning.

"What goes up must come down.

Now you're headed for Rickety Town.

Ride all the rides, have some fun,

Then eat your heart out on a sesame seed bun!" he said, before letting out another maniacal laugh which echoed as Rickety Town's entrance came into view.

The entrance to Rickety Town was rather simple. It was a sign made up of a bunch of wooden planks tied together by ropes which were tied to two wooden poles. The sign, of course, said Rickety Town and was written rather crudely in bold black paint.

Upon entering, Kid saw a large, wooden Ferris wheel next to a tall woodsman in the background. Immediately in front of him was the starting point of a wood-framed roller coaster. The roller coaster was surrounded by fake snow with a fully decorated Christmas tree propped up to the left and a red, snow-covered chimney to the right. Behind the roller coaster stood another red chimney and a giant sign constructed of large, white letters on Christmas light-covered wooden stilts. The white letters had what appeared to be red paint oozing from the top as if blood were running down them; the sign read Slay Ride. The coaster itself was a classic red sleigh with white, snow-like trimming.

"Ooo, I hope we get to see Santa Claus!" Patty said excitedly as they approached the sleigh.

Suddenly, a short, blue skinned, goblin-like creature emerged from the sleigh wearing a green, white-trimmed elf costume. The "elf" tried to stab Kid with a candy cane with the tip sharpened to a point. Kid quickly responded by shooting until it fell back and died, letting out a death cry that almost sounded like a quack.

"Well that was…unusual" Kid commented before Liz collected its soul and they got into the sleigh, pushing out the bloody corpse in the process.

The coaster started up, jerking forward before heading past four more red chimneys and up the long drop hill. At the top of the drop hill, there was a white platform with a roof shelter which ended where the drop was…or should've been. Upon reaching the top, the group found that the connecting track was missing leaving only a long fall. Liz and Patty changed back into guns as Kid quickly took them and jumped out of the coaster before it fell over the edge.

After getting off the sleigh, Kid was immediately confronted with another "elf". This one tried to stab him with its shiv, but he quickly dodged and shot the creature, sending it off the side of the platform. Kid stood up and looked around.

"Hmmm, how are we going to get down?" Kid wondered aloud, peeking over the edge where the sleigh had fallen.

"Oh, how about the Ferris wheel? Patty suggested as Kid turned and saw the huge, log-themed Ferris wheel with green-roofed cars which stood next to a large metallic Paul Bunyan statue.

"Do you really think that's a good idea, Kid?" Liz asked with a hint of fear. Kid responded with a sigh.

"It's the only other way I can see us getting down…" Kid admitted. He walked back as far as he could; he rushed forward and jumped into one of the cars of the moving ride.

Kid hit the floor of the car with a grunt. He winced, standing up and brushing himself off.

"Are you alright, Kid?" Liz asked. Kid nodded.

"Yeah, I'm fine," he said as the ride suddenly halted near the back of the giant metal statue.

Kid looked at the statue with a puzzled expression. The statue's head had a large hole in the back of it from which three large, flying insects emerged. The insects were about the size of a pigeon and had very large abdomens with stingers at the end as well as a set of pincers at the ends on their heads.

The insects came buzzing toward Kid and attempted to bite and sting him. He shot two of them down before they could reach him. The third one, however, had escaped his sight. It revealed itself by biting his ear. Kid screamed as the powerful, razor-like pincers sank into his flesh. He tried to yank it off but to no avail. He instead settled for simply shooting it. Its severed head released its grip. Afterwards, the ride continued. Kid hopped off the car once it was at the ground platform, clutching his bleeding ear.

Upon exiting the ride, Kid tore off a piece of his jacket to use it as a temporary bandage for his wound. He found himself in front of a row of what looked to be red and white colored shooting galleries. No one was manning them.

"Are you alright, Kid?" Patty asked with concern.

"It's just a flesh wound; I'll live," Kid said as they came up to a large sign in the middle of the gallery area. The sign had white letters on a blue background which read If you need assistance, look for…Mr. Smiley! And just beneath the words was the head shot of a man dressed like a 50's-style mechanic with a yellow officer's hat and a black bow tie. His skin was a putrid green and he had a vacant, toothy grin plastered on his face.

"He looks friendly," Patty said with a giggle.

"He looks creepy," Liz commented in a mildly disturbed tone.

"I don't think he'd be of much assistance to us. Let's just try to avoid him," Kid said as he turned around only to come face to face with Mr. Smiley himself.

Just as was implied in the picture, he was wearing a white mechanic uniform. A yellow patch on the right side of his chest read "Smiley" in black cursive letters.

"Hello, how may I help you?" Mr. Smiley asked in a cheerful tone.

"Um, could you point me to the exit?" Kid replied, slightly puzzled.

"I'm afraid there is no exit from CarnEvil, except for one thing…" he answered.

"And that would be?" Kid asked though the answer was already obvious.

"Death!" Mr. Smiley cheered before punching Kid in the face, knocking him back a little.

"Son of a bitch!" Kid exclaimed, wiping his chin. He shot Mr. Smiley in the face. Mr. Smiley staggered as he attempted to dodge the bullets. He was not doing a very good job. It did not take long for him to fall down, dead in a pool of his own blood. Liz transformed back and collected his soul before they moved on.

Past the gallery area, they found the entrance to a ride called Dino Rama to the right. The entrance was constructed to look like an arcing dinosaur rib with the letters in the sign also made to look like bone. To the left was a bunch of large brown stones with palm trees on top of them, a miniature volcano spewing yellow glowing lava, and a large Tyrannosaurus Rex skeleton in the background.

"This doesn't seem so bad," Liz commented before a tall, cartoonish dinosaur jumped out from behind the rocks and roared. The "dinosaur" seemed to resemble a Tyrannosaurus Rex but looked more like a man in a costume. It had bulging eyes, small but movable four-clawed hands, a maw full of sharp teeth, spikes on its back, and its entire body was a bluish-green.

Kid quickly shot at the creature. It let out a pitiful roar before falling over dead. Its soul was collected by Patty before they headed towards the Dino Rama. The ride itself consisted of three platforms, all spinning with two enormous, green dinosaur heads near the edges. Each platform had three rotating, spotted eggs, some of which opened to reveal seats. Kid walked past the entrance and timed the movements before jumping onto one of the platforms.

As he kept himself steady and waited for it to move towards the other end, one of the eggs opened up and revealed another dinosaur. It began sliding towards him. Unfortunately, due to the movement of the ride, Kid was unable to get a lock on it and had to jump to another platform to avoid it. He took a brief sigh of relief as the ride approached the other side. Just then, another dinosaur surprised him from behind and pushed him off the ride, causing him to land face-first in front of two more dinosaurs.

"Well that was embarrassing…" Kid admitted as he stood up and shot both of the dinosaurs, killing them. Liz and Patty collecting their souls.

"I don't know, I thought it was funny," Patty said before chuckling. Liz bopped her on the head.

"Now's not the best time to be making fun of our Meister ," Liz said as they changed back.

Kid turned to see a food court and, just beyond that, the rest of the roller coaster. He proceeded to run down the three arches formed by giant, leaning forks, advertising food on top of them. Once he entered the food court, he took a quick look around. It consisted of a red and white color scheme. Picnic tables were set here and there, with a black pole in the center which displayed red and white checkered banners.

There were only four stands: a corn dog stand, a pizza stand, a burrito stand, and a fried chicken stand. Each had a large version of their served food on top. They each were manned by a short, green kid with a skull-like face, wearing an orange and yellow fast food uniform. Upon making his entrance, they all began to throw food at Kid.

"This is just ridiculous," Kid growled, ducking and running through the food court. He did not want to waste his time with these minor nuisances. He managed to make it through without harm, but then he heard something.

"Clean up on aisle seven!" a cracking voice shouted, causing Kid to turn and face it. He was met with the skeleton kid from the burrito stand, who threw the food of choice at him. It struck Kid in the face, feeling a rock.

"You little shit!" Kid shouted as he shot at the skeleton kid. When he was done, there was nothing but a bloody pulp.

"Should we…go collect his soul?" Liz asked.

"No, we can do without his. Now, let's go," he replied as he exited the food court and moved on to the next attraction.

Immediately outside of the food court, there was a large, green building with read pillars, boarded up windows, a garage door at the entrance, and a red neon sign which read Gar ge. Kid stopped for a moment and looked up at the sign with confusion before realizing that the a in Garage had fallen off.

"Apparently all these undead monsters can't be bothered with maintenance," Kid commented.

"Well it is called Rickety Town for a reason…" Patty replied before they proceeded into the ride, the garage door opening automatically.

Inside, they found a figure-eight track with two large gas pumps in the center of each turn. The walls were covered in black and white checker patterns, and the ceiling was nothing but black arches with lights on them. On the track itself, there was an empty red bumper car and three Mr. Smileys in blue bumper cars circling the track.

"Liz, I want you to use Patty while I drive," Kid ordered. Liz changed into her human form before they climbed into the red bumper car. Kid took the wheel, while Liz stood and aimed Patty.

Kid drove around the track, casually, before the Mr. Smileys took notice and began to converge on the Meister and his weapons, one by one. The first one tried to drive up next to them and hit them with a wrench, but Liz shot him in the face and quickly collected his soul. The second one tried to ram them from behind, but he was gunned down and sent off the track.

"These guys aren't so tough," Liz said triumphantly. Suddenly, the third one rammed them from the side, causing Liz to fall over onto Kid and blind him with her chest.

The sudden impact and the end result caused Kid's nose to bleed profusely and, in his panic, steer the bumper car off the track and through a wall; this sent Liz and Patty tumbling over it. Liz groaned as she managed to stand up, while Kid wiped his nose clean with his sleeve.

"Why did you do that?" Liz exclaimed.

"I was…blinded, that guy came out of left field and suddenly it was dark," Kid said as he blushed slightly. Liz huffed, starting to look a little miffed.

"Hey look!" Patty said, changing back and pointing ahead. In front of them was another section of the Slay Ride; the sleigh was perched at the start of the hill and with a ladder that conveniently led up to it.

"Let's move on then," Kid said, getting out of the bumper car.

"We'll talk about this later," Liz said as she and Patty changed into their weapon forms before Kid collected them and climbed into the sleigh.

The coaster started up once more and headed up the hill, going through two large flaming wreaths. It reached the top of the hill where he could see that the ride ended in a large white dome with a huge reindeer on top.

"Oooooo, I bet that's where Santa is!" Patty said excitedly before the coaster sped down the coiling track, through a pair of wooden doors, and into the dome.

Inside the dome, there was what looked to be an ice skating rink with fake snow, and what could have been toy workshops dotting the landscape with clearly painted pine trees on the walls. The dome itself was decorated to look like a starry winter sky with faux snowflakes. At the center of the dome was an incredibly tall Christmas tree with various presents stacked underneath it. The tree itself was adorned with huge, round ornaments and a bright, yellow star on top.

"Oh Santa! Where are yooooou?" Patty called as she suddenly changed into her human form.

"I'm sorry to say, little girl, but Santa is not here," an odd Santa-like voice replied.

"Huh? What do you mean?" Patty asked, confused.

"Well you see…" the tree suddenly spun around. It revealed a large staircase leading up to a red throne. "My name is Krampus!" the man atop the throne said in a now growling voice. He jumped down in front of the group.

The man in question was a tall, fat man wearing a blue Santa outfit and a white beard that was tied at four places. He also wore two sets of antlers on his head, a pair of long ones at his temples and another, shorter pair at the top. His hands were a pair of long, sharp, brown claws bursting from his green gloves. He carried a large burlap sack and got around on golden, spiked skates attached to his black boots.

"I'll stuff your stocking!" Krampus shouted as Patty changed back. He started slashing at Kid with his huge claws.

Kid dodged his claws, but he tripped on the ice and slid into one of the workshops. With an annoyed grunt, he managed to get back and start firing on Krampus, hitting him and causing him to bleed with every shot that hit.

"Jack Frost!" he cried out as he skated towards Kid, dodging some of the shots. He tried to swing at him with his heavy sack. Kid slid out of the way and continued firing. He noticed his opponent's chest was starting to bled heavily and began focusing on it. Krampus responded by trying to slash at him again, barely managing to graze him as Kid slid far away, attempting to put some distance between them.

"How about a nice lump of coal?" Krampus said, reaching into his bag and pulling out a large black rock and throwing it at him.

"No thanks, I've been good this year," Kid responded before jumping up and kicking it back at him. The hunk of rock hit Krampus in the chest with an audible crack and a cry of pain.

"Not nice!" Krampus yelled as the lump of coal collapsed his chest, revealing his heart. Kid, seeing an opportunity, began to slide towards him as Krampus did the same, his claws outstretched and ready to strike. Once they met, Kid jammed his weapons into Krampus' open wound and fired rapidly. Krampus cried out in pain. His heart ruptured and he fell back, letting out one last cry of agony before dying. Kid panted as he sat on the ground. Krampus' dark blue soul rose up from his corpse, and it started to snow.

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