Surviving At Stanford

Chapter 11

The day of my next scheduled therapy appointment arrived, and Sam, as I had suspected he would be, was on my case about it from the moment he saw me walk into the kitchen.

"So..." He began.

"So..." I repeated, knowing exactly where this was going.

"Your therapy appointment is today." Sam continued.

"Really? I'd completely forgotten." I stated sarcastically.

Sam shot me his bitch face. "Carrie, you should at least give these sessions a chance."

I sighed. "Why?" I stopped and turned to face him. "How is washing up all those memories and talking about them going to help me?"

"They don't just make you talk about everything for the hell of it, Carrie. It will help you in the long run."

"I don't want to talk to some stranger about my feelings..." I stated.

"Okay..." Sam nodded. "So let's talk."

I furrowed an eyebrow. "What?"

"If you don't want to talk to a stranger, then let's talk." Sam walked over and sat down on the couch.

"This is stupid, Sam." I followed him into the living room and sat down in the armchair.

"Carrie, I am your brother, and I wanna' help you." Sam stated softly.

I smiled. "I know."

"You've always talked to me about these sorts of things, what's changed?"

"I don't know...This stuff is know...heavy..." I stated.

"Carrie, my Mom, she didn't die in a fire." Sam began.

I furrowed an eyebrow. "But John and Dean, they said that..."

"Well she did die in the fire, but it wasn't an accident."

My eyes widened. "If it wasn't an accident...then what happened?"

"She died in my nursery. My Dad, he heard her scream, and when he ran in, she was on the ceiling." Sam explained, his voice clearly reflective on the emotions he was feeling talking about this.

"Why was she on the ceiling?"

"It was a demon." Sam answered. "Yellow eyed demon."

"Oh my god." I didn't know what to say.

"My Dad, he couldn't save her. Apparently the flames just engulfed the room so he couldn't get to her. That's why he became a hunter, to track down the thing that killed her and kill it." Sam smiled softly at me. "I can handle heavy, Carrie, and I'm not here to judge."

I nodded trying to hold back tears. "So where d'you wanna' start?"

It had been a few hours since Sam and I's heart to heart, and I had to admit I was feeling better after it. Currently reading some book that Jess had left lying around, I noticed Sam kept coughing. I glanced at him, before looking back down at the book.

After a few seconds, he began to cough again.

"Sam?" I asked in concern.

One. Two. Three. Four. Sam's fifth cough ended the fit.

I rushed over, and placed a hand on his back in comfort. "Are you sick?" I asked.

"No." Sam shook his head.

I just looked at him.

"I'm not sick." He stated before noticing the expression on my face. "You worry too much, it's just a cough."

"'It's just a cough'." I repeated his words, although they held no anger. "That's what Wolfe used to say." I sighed.

Sam shook his head, mentally kicking himself for his choice of words. "Don't worry about it." He replied in a hoarse tone.

I furrowed an eyebrow as I noticed his eyelids flickering as if he was struggling to keep his eyes open. "Sam?" I closed the distance between us and put a hand on his cheek, before panicking at what I discovered. My eyes widened. "You're burning up."

"I'm fine." Sam insisted, before shakily getting out of his seat.


Sam's breath became heavier.

"Sam?" I furrowed an eyebrow.

One minute, Sam was upright and making his way across the room, the next, he was falling.

"Sam!" I exclaimed in horror before running over and catching him just before he smacked against the floor. I was nowhere near strong enough to support his dead weight, so we both hit the floor, me much harder than him as I took the brunt of the impact, breaking Sam's fall. "Sam?" I shook him gently. "Sammy?"

Sam only groaned, as sweat trickled down his face from his forehead, and his eyes remained shut.

Taking my phone out of my pocket, I punched in 911.

"Thanks for scaring me like that." I shook my head, as I followed the guerney he had been placed on down the corridor of the hospital, lighting gripping the metal bar that ran along the side.

"I'm sorry." He apologised.

I smiled at him softly. "It's okay." I ran a hand through his brown hair. "You just need to hang in there, and get better." I smiled once again. "That's how you can make it up to me."

The doctor walked over. "I'm sorry, but you can't accompany your friend into the x-ray department." He stated. "There's a waiting room just down the hall though."

I nodded before looking down at Sam. "I'll see you straight after." I squeezed his hand reassuringly, before walking off the waiting room and taking a seat on one of the crappy plastic chairs.

The walls of the room were light blue, and tatty curtains of roughly the same colour were hung over the windows, blocking out the light of the moon.

The sound of hurried footsteps could be heard in the corridor, getting progressively louder as they came closer.

Looking up, Dean was stood in the doorway.

"Dean?" I stood up.

"Where's Sam?" He immediately asked. "Is he alright?"

"The doctor's presume so, they've found nothing majorly wrong with him." I explained. "They think it's Acute Sinusitis, but they've sent him upstairs to get an x-ray just to make sure."

"Is that bad?"

I shook my head. "Apparently it doesn't last very long, just a few weeks, and you treat it with antibiotics."

Dean sank down in the seat next to the one I had been sat in, and sighed in relief. "Oh thank god."

"How did you know we were here?" I asked.

"Jess rang me." He stated.

"Oh." I nodded.

"Today wasn't the first time she's rang me though." Dean continued in a soft tone. "She's been worried about you too."

I sighed, looking down.

"Hey..." His voice was caring and gentle. Dean placed a hand on my chin, lifting my head up so that I was looking at him.

A tear trickled down my cheek.

Not saying a single word, Dean simply pulled me against him, and wrapped his arms around me. His hold was tight and protective, and I loved it. Not realising just how much I had missed it.

I buried myself against his chest.

Dean began to stroke my hair. "She told me about Wolfe's memorial, and how depressed you've been feeling." His voice was heavy in concern. "And I know I'm that I'm a factor in that..." Dean sighed. "Carrie I'm sorry." He apologised as his voice began to crack.

I witnessed a tear trickle down his cheek.

Dean rested his chin gently on top of my head. "I'm so sorry." He was almost shaking now, and it hurt me to see him so worn down. Dean pressed a long kiss to my head, before hugging me tighter. "I..." He found himself at a loss for words.

"I know, Dean." I replied, softly, knowing exactly what he meant. "I love you too."

-Sam's POV-

The clock had just hit 2AM when the doctors discharged me with the advice to take my prescribed antibiotics, and rest.

"Do you know where my friend is?" I asked.

The nurse smiled at me before motioning down the hall. "She's in the waiting room."


Walking down the corridor, I instantly felt guilty for scaring her like that, and making her wait for so long by herself. Stupid Sinusitis! Reaching the waiting room, I opened the door. What I saw brought a smile to my face.

Dean and Carrie were sat next to each other, Carrie's head rested on Dean's shoulder, curled into him, one arm round his back, one hand fisting the material of his shirt. Dean was also slumped towards Carrie, obviously to try and make her more comfortable, arms wrapped around her tightly as if never to let her go again. They were both fast asleep.

I closed the door as quietly as possible, but Dean being Dean was aware in seconds. His eyes flickered open, and caught sight of me through half open slits.

"Sam?" He asked sleepily.

I smiled. "Hi, Dean."

Dean immediately knew what I was smiling at and looked down at Carrie in his arms. He smiled softly, before gently sliding out of the seat, gently lying Carrie down across the two. He checked that she was still sleeping peacefully before walking over to me and placing his hands on my shoulders so that he could check me over.

"Dean...I'm fine, honestly." I stated, but I knew that wasn't going to cut it.

"Sam, you just collapsed." He retorted.

"Yeah, eight hours ago. I'm fine now, it's just a sinus infection that packs a bit more of a punch." I explained.

He raised an eyebrow.

"If you don't believe me, go ask my doctor. He just discharged me."

"What about the x-ray?" He asked.

"Came back clear." I stated. "Now can we go please, I've had just about enough of hospitals for one day." I smirked.

Dean smirked too.

I looked over at Carrie.

"Just let her sleep, she needs it." Dean stated, before walking back over and gently lifting her into his arms being careful not to wake her.

I smiled at him. Anyone could see just how much he loved her, and always had. The two of them were struggling to function without each other in the few months they were apart.

Carrie stirred slightly, but only shuffled closer to Dean's warmth.

Dean smiled with a smirk and a slight shake of his head.

I knew that there wasn't anything that my brother wouldn't do for Carrie, and he wouldn't have it any other way. I was just thankful that Dean had come to his senses and realised just how co-dependent the two of them are on each other. And that co-dependency is what makes their relationship so special. Even thinking back to the early days back at Bobby's, their relationship was beginning to blossom even back then. I'm thankful that my brother has Carrie, because with her, he can open up, be himself. My brother has always wanted to settle down with one girl, even though he would probably deny it. Despite the fact that at school, he was always the kid who made the girls swoon, and had the entire cheerleading squad lining up. But we never stayed long enough for a relationship to develop, and Dean knew that, which is why he never made any of them permanent. In his mind, he thought of them as nothing more than just another girl. I probably knew their names better than Dean did. But, it was blatantly obvious that he wasn't happy. That he wished he could have a stable life. A one where we didn't have to move around so much, didn't have to hunt, and had a Mom and Dad, just like any other teenager. A life where your biggest concerns were things like swatting for exams, and making the football team, not having to recite a excorcism in case of encountering a demon, or knowing what type of bullets you needed to kill a werewolf. Saying it like that, our life is so weird! But now with Carrie, Dean's like a different person. They're both so perfect for each other that it's creepy.

Walking down the corridor of the hospital, and out of the doors towards the parking lot, I spotted the Impala instantly, and god have I missed her! The last time I saw her, was March. Everything about her was the same. Obviously. Dean would never change anything on that car, he'd probably rather die then install something like a CD player.

Dean threw me the keys, and I unlocked her before opening the back door so that Dean could lay Carrie down on the backseat.

I then sat shotgun, as always, and threw Dean back the keys.

He turned to me. "You sure you're okay?"

I nodded. "Yeah, I'm fine."

Dean smiled before inserting the key into the ignition and firing her up.

Halfway back to the apartment, Carrie began to stir in the back. I turned in my seat.

Carrie's eyes flickered open, before she furrowed an eyebrow, obviously confused by how she was now on the backseat of the Impala, instead of being in the waiting room at the hospital. As she caught sight of me, a smile lit up her face. "Sam?"

I smiled too.

She sat upright. "What happened? Are you alright? Why aren't we at the hospital?"

"I'm fine. The doctor's given me some antibiotics."

Carrie nodded. "That's good." She yawned. "What time is it by the way?"

Dean looked at the time on his watch. "Just gone two thirty."

"I wonder is Jess has waited up?" Carrie stated. "I feel bad for not ringing her, I wrote that note in a hurry so it wasn't exactly detailed. She's probably been worrying since she came back to find the two of us gone."

"She was in a state when she rang me." Dean explained. "But I calmed her down as much as I could over the phone."

"I'm sure she's fine." Carrie stated.

Unlocking the door of the apartment, I pushed open the door.

I saw Jess sat on the couch. She turned in an instant, eyes widening in relief. "Sam!" She grinned, rushing over and bundling me into a hug. "Oh thank god!"

I smiled and wrapped my arms around her, pulling her close. I stroked a hand through her hair comfortingly, before pressing a kiss to her forehead.

"I was so worried about you!" Jess rested her head against my chest. "Are you okay?"

I nodded. "I'm fine, Jess." I reassured.

Jess looked round me and noticed Dean with Carrie. A smile lit up her face.

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