Surviving At Stanford

Chapter 2

Christmas Eve

There was a knock at the door. Opening it, it was Jess. I stepped out of the door slightly, and closed it a bit behind me so that she couldn't see into the room. "Hey. I thought you were going home for Christmas?"

"I am, I thought I'd just stop by." She smiled. "So when are you leaving then?"

"Oh, we're not leaving." I stated.

Sam walked to the door after hearing that it was Jess.

"You're staying here?" She furrowed an eyebrow. "What about your parents, won't they be wanting you home for Christmas?" Jess' innocence was one of the thing's that made her so sweet.

"Some things were said before we left, so we kinda' don't have anywhere to go." Sam explained.

"Oh..." Jess nodded, before peering round the door slightly. She smiled. "I've never been in your room before."

Sam and I cringed slightly, embarrassed by the room.

Jess noticed this, and immediately kicked herself for being so forward. "I'm sorry..." She apologised. "But honestly, I know what you probably think of me." Jess stated. "That I'm some posh, stuck up brat from Maryland."

I shook my head. "We don't think that, Jess." Smiling softly, I pushed open the door. "Don't set your expectations too high."

Jess walked in.

I closed the door behind her.

Jess looked around at our room. "So this is where you've been living?"

"Yep." Sam nodded. "All four foot of it." He joked.

"It's a bit bare."

"We've got everything we need."

"And where are the Christmas decorations?" Jess asked.

"We don't really do the whole Christmas thing." I explained.

"How can you not do the whole Christmas thing? It's Christmas, you're supposed to give cheesy presents, eat too much, and fall asleep on the couch while watching The Snowman." Jess stated.

"We don't really have the money."

Jess looked at the clock on the wall before at Sam and I. "I better get going, don't want to miss my flight."

I smiled. "Bye Jess. Merry Christmas. Have fun, and try not to drink to much."

"Thanks." She smirked.

Sam walked over to the door and opened it for her. "Merry Christmas, Jess."

Jess smiled. "Merry Christmas, Sam."

Christmas Day

The next day, there was a knock at the door. I tried to block out the noise in the hope that whoever was knocking would just go away. Turning over in bed and pulling the covers up tighter around myself, I lifted my foot up and out of the tangle of covers and began prodding the mattress of Sam's bunk. "Sam..." I mumbled, sleepily. "Door..."

"Get it yourself..." Came his reply in the same unawake tone as mine.

"Uhhh..." I moaned, reluctantly throwing back the warm covers and swinging my legs round the side of the bed. "I hate you..." I rubbed my eyes, to try and wake myself up a bit before yawning.

"I know..." Came Sam's response.

Remembering the whole reason I was having to get up at this time, I stumbled over to the door. "I thought Santa was supposed to come down the chimney." I opened the door before furrowing an eyebrow as I noticed Jess standing outside.

"Merry Christmas!" Jess beamed.

"Jess? What are you doing here?"

"Well, you two don't have anywhere else to go, and it didn't seem right to go home and celebrate knowing that you and Sam would be here through Winter break, so I thought we could celebrate together. You know, just the three of us." She explained. "I brought eggnog." Jess smiled, holding up a jug.

"Not meaning to burst your bubble or anything, Jess, but Sam and I aren't exactly the Cratchit's." I didn't want to ruin her Christmas, not when she still had the chance to get home and celebrate properly.

"It's as if you want to get rid of me, Rose." She smirked.

"I don't, it's just that your Christmas will be 20 times better if you spend it with your parents." I stated

"Oh come on, you can't not celebrate Christmas." Jess stated with a smile.

"Bah humbug." Shouted Sam with a smirk from inside the room.

I laughed. "Won't your parents be expecting you?" I asked.

"I've just got back from visiting my parents. That's where I made the cookies and got the eggnog from. I also bought this." She handed me a green plastic wreath with a red bow painted on it. "You had to have at least one decoration." She smiled.

"Jess you really shouldn't have gone to so much trouble over us. Seriously."

"Don't be stupid. She smiled. "It's Christmas, your supposed to give people things. Just in this case, I'm giving you Christmas."

"Fine." I stepped back from the door and waved her in. "Welcome to Scrooge and Marley's."

Sam, who was now suddenly wide awake after hearing that it was Smurfette at the door, was standing by the bed. He then took the bags and jug off Jess before walking over to the desk and placing them down on it.

Jess placed down the plate of cookies before looking around for somewhere to hang the wreath. Finding an overhanging bracket on the curtain rail in which to hang it from, Jess tried to hook it up, but wasn't tall enough. Sam walked over, and lifted her up slightly so that she could reach it, both laughing and giggling as it took a few attempts to hang the tacky thing up.

I smiled at how adorable the two of them were. Seeing Sam and Jess, I found myself missing Dean more than ever. I knew he was only a phone call away, but I couldn't hide the fact that I was scared. It had been just over 4 months since we'd last spoken, and that was when he dropped us off here.

The wreath didn't exactly make the room look very festive, but if it would make Jess happy to have it up there, then that was all that really mattered.

"Eggnog?" Jess asked.

"Sure." I nodded before grabbing two mugs, and a glass and putting them down next to the jug. "Sorry." I apologised. "Nobody really comes round, so we don't really have anything better than that." I slid the mug across to her. "You can have mine, I'll have the glass."

Jess filled them all with eggnog.

Sam walked over and handed me his mug before picking up the glass.

"Thanks." I smiled.

"You're welcome." He smiled back.

"So how do you two know each other?" Jess asked.

"Carrie's my sister." Sam stated, before taking a sip out of his glass of eggnog.

Jess furrowed an eyebrow. "Your name's Singer though, right?"

Name: Carrie Singer / DOB: 1st June 1983' Is what my Student ID card reads. When filling out our Stanford admission forms, Sam and I thought it would probably be best if I changed my surname, as 'Carrie Winters' would flare up notes about the car accident, and the fact that I was effectively missing for the last two years, and still technically am. I thought Singer was appropriate.

I nodded. "Long story." Taking out my phone, I checked to see if I had any texts or missed calls.

I didn't.

I was really starting to get worried. I hadn't heard from Dean since the day he dropped us off at Stanford. He had also promised that he'd come up here for Christmas. The pit of my stomach was telling me that something was wrong.

Knowing exactly what I was thinking about, Sam nudged me causing me look up at him before he smiled reassuringly. "He'll be here."

I nodded, although I had my doubts.

Sat on one of the snow covered benches in the park just across from our apartment block, I looked down at my phone, my finger nervously hovering over the call button.

'Don't be a wuss, Carrie! It's only Dean! Just ring the friggin' guy already!'

Taking a deep breath, I pushed the button and put the phone to my ear as I nervously listened to the rings.

"This is Dean. State your name, number and nightmare after the tone."

'Well that's new.'

"Plan B." I scrolled down my contacts list before pressing call.

"This is Dean's other cell, leave a message." Came the response of the voicemail message after endlessly ringing like his first number had.

"Plan C..." I dialled the number.


"This is Dean's other, other cell. I'm sure you know what to do after the tone."

'Oh screw it!' I sighed before flipping my phone shut and looking down at the snow on the ground. I pulled my coat a little bit tighter around myself as the chill of Winter set in a little. Glancing at the phone in my hand, I thought I'd give it one last go.

'Ringing, ringing and more ringing...'

"This is Dean. State your name, number and nightmare after the tone."


"Hey, Dean. By the sounds of your voicemail message, you've obviously started hunting again, which is why you probably can't answer your phone. Things have been a little chaotic here, and I can't imagine what you're doing is any easier either. " I paused. "Don't laugh at me for saying this, but right now, I just want to hear the sound of your voice, instead of some crappy recording...especially on Christmas..." I sighed. "Sitting here, I'm trying to keep my mind at rest that you're not bleeding to death in a ditch somewhere, because I don't see what you could possibly be hunting at this time. Truth is, I'm trying to hold it together, man. Sam's not doing so good. Everything with John's really hit him hard, and it's clear that he's missing you." I sniffled, unshed tears threatening to fall. "I miss you so much, Dean..." My voice cracked as a tear trickled down my cheek. "You said you'd be here..." More tears began to fall as I could no longer hold them back. I glanced down at the time on the phone, there wasn't long left before Christmas Day would be over for another year. "Merry Christmas, Dean."

The phone beeped to say the recording time had elapsed, and that's when I broke down. A light sniffle becoming a sob. I buried my head in my hands as I cried.

I felt the bench move slightly under the pressure of someone sitting down next to me before an arm was wrapped around my shoulders.

Looking up, I sniffled.

It was Sam.

He pulled me against his side.

I rested my head against his shoulder as I continued to cry.

"Merry Christmas, Carrie." Sam spoke up in a soft, comforting tone.

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