Feather in the wind

Chapter 12

Ianto was angry.

No. Ianto was furious.

He didn't ask for much. Couldn't really and his routine was important to him. This was afternoon cuddle time and when Jack came in with a crying Gwen he decided he was happy to cuddle with them both. But when Jack sat in the big cuddle chair and Gwen climbed into his lap howling about someone called 'Eugene' Ianto knew she was going to steal his cuddles.

At first he tried the pout.

Then soft hooting and arms out, hug time come and get it.

Then he growled softly to show he was unhappy.

He considered throwing something but his coordination still sucked in this stupid body he was stuck with so all he could do was yell.

What he didn't expect was for Gwen to run away and Jack to yell back.

"It's not always about you!" Jack roared, "Couldn't you see she was upset? Did you care? Jesus Ianto, give a little. Do you care about anyone else these days?"

Jack stormed off after her as Ianto sat with his mouth open then looked down at his stupid body.

Fine!

Not a problem. Fuck you too!

Ianto levered himself to the edge of the bed and whined quietly with fear, then reached for the chair arm. He shakily heaved himself upright and stood for the first time.

Then he fell.

He raged at his body, fists slamming down on his useless limbs as he growled with frustration.

Fine. Fuck you too, stupid legs.

Ianto crawled painstakingly across the floor to the bathroom and found it easier on the tiled floor. Once inside he pushed the door shut and glared at it.

Selfish. Jack didn't want to take care of him anymore, he was too much work. Too needy and stupid.

Ianto sobbed quietly for a while as he pondered his next move.

Couldn't exactly storm out, not with this traitorous body.

Toshi's nice. Toshi likes him. She'll look after him when Jack leaves him.

That decided, Ianto settled on the floor. Curled into a ball, he shivered and drifted off to sleep. Hungry because afternoon tea happened during cuddle time and he didn't get that anymore. Gotta get used to that.

When Tosh found the empty bed she didn't panic, searching for Jack. When she found Jack on the sofa with Gwen she asked where Ianto might be and got a blank expression, followed by a horrified one as Jack hurtled towards their room. The tray of cold food a reminder that Ianto's feeding time was overdue.

He thrived on routine and the multiple feeds to build him up were working. He still couldn't eat a large meal so a small one peppered throughout the day were the answer. Ianto enjoyed the one on one feeding time as well, a chance for them both to connect.

Jack had shut the bond down so it wouldn't interfere with the eye. Gods, he forgot to tell Ianto they would be separated. Fuck.

The empty bed was a worry and Owen's squawk of anger through the coms told him that Ianto wasn't there either. Jack looked at the bathroom door.

Jack pushed the door open and found Ianto curled up in a corner of the room, asleep. With relief thrumming, Jack bent to pick him up and Ianto cried out with pain.

Jack scooped him up and ran to the bed, Tosh calling for Owen as she wrung her hands.

Owen examined Ianto then turned and slapped Jack hard on the arm.

"What the fuck did you do to upset him?" Owen demanded.

"I was angry with him and yelled" Jack whined as he rubbed his arm.

"Well, he fell out of bed or something judging from the bruise on his hip and the bruises on his legs suggests he was hitting himself with rage," Owen took delight in the horror on Jack's face, "Looks like a temper tantrum to me. Little bugger got upset and took it out on himself."

"Oh God" Jack moaned as he lifted the blanket and looked at the bare legs that looked so frail with the silk boxer shorts.

The skin was mottled with bruising and Jack knew it was still coming out. Jack also knew this was his fault. His first mistake. Well, in this life.

Jack reached out and touched the bruised skin, then pulled back the band of the boxers to look at the deep angry bruising there.

Ianto opened his eyes and saw Jack, reaching out to push his hand away.

"No! Toshi's Tiger now. You want Gwen."

"Ianto" Jack sighed as he sank into the chair, "Gwen was sad. Really sad. She needed a cuddle."

"I'm sad too. Why is she more special?"

"Ianto …"

"I know!" Ianto snapped, "I'm selfish and stupid now!"

"Ianto, I didn't say that" Jack argued and Ianto looked up with fury in his eyes.

"It's not always about you!" Ianto spoke out loud and everyone gasped as he said it calmly in an uncanny American accent, "Couldn't you see she was upset? Did you care? Jesus Ianto, give a little. Do you care about anyone else these days?"

"Gods, did I say that?" Jack groaned as he reached for Ianto's hand.

"Sorry baby, I was upset and not thinking straight." Jack whispered, "You know I'm a bloody idiot at times and thoughtless."

"Doesn't matter" Ianto sulked as he spoke out loud again, "Give her all my hugs. I don't care. I'll just lay here and rot."

"Ianto, stop this" Jack begged, "I love you."

Ianto defiantly fixed Jack with a withering stare.

"No."

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