Chapter 4

Italics are Naughty Tosh's thoughts today

Ianto was unsure which outfit to wear and had everything strewn across his bed, looking like a bomb had exploded in his wardrobe and flung the debris back into the room. Tosh was so amused by this uncharacteristic display of nerves that she couldn't stop giggling. Stop it, he'll hear you.

"Are you going to help me or just sit there like a bloody fool?" Ianto snapped.

Tosh knew he didn't mean it and didn't take his snarls to heart. He was so nervous that it hadn't occurred to him that his towel had fallen off and he was parading around naked in front of her.

She struggled to refrain from shielding her eyes at his manhood swinging about. Nah. Not really. Nice view actually.

The scar forming on his hip still looked angry but his limp was less noticeable now as he strode back and forth in front of the bed in a parody of a soldier marching to parade. Attention!

"I liked the last three, Yan." She giggled again as he whipped around to look at her, his semi-erect penis following the rest of him half a beat later. Hello there, Mr Big Winky Monster.

"Yeah, but which would Jack like?" he sighed, looking at the mess with falling enthusiasm.

Ianto had one hand reaching for the back of his neck, the other on his hip as he surveyed the warzone. God, where's the phone … ah. Just one quick snap of THAT!

"Jack?" She smiled. "Thinking about him?"

"Yeah," he sighed. "Our first date, this. He's so … you know."

Frustrated again, he stormed over to the bed and started sorting through the carnage with a frown.

"No, I mean …" Tosh giggled, pointing at his groin. "Thinking about him?"

"Jesus H Christ Almighty on a Harley!" Ianto screamed as he finally noticed the lack of towel.

Tosh collapsed into the mound of clothes in fits of laughter that hurt her sides as Ianto continued to roar and fling his arms about with horror. He hadn't noticed the phone, the click of the camera function, or the fact that she had sent it to Jack.

Jack, who about now was probably wondering what Ianto was texting him for this close to their date. Surprise!

Ianto threw himself on the bed to cover his growing excitement at the thought of being near Jack, and forgot about his naked bum.

The crack of her palm across his rear cheek was loud and he squealed from the shock of the sudden onslaught.

"Tosh!" he screamed, reaching for something to cover himself.

As he stood glaring at her, she collapsed again into gales of laughter. He looked down and groaned. Yes well, a string vest wasn't really going to hide that, was it?

"Stop it you bloody cow!" he roared before collapsing with mirth beside her.

"God, what's he doing to me?" he moaned into her hair as they gasped and giggled.

"Not as much as he hopes to," she retorted with tears rolling down her face.

"Argh!" Ianto rolled onto his back then remembered again, glaring at her as her eyes tracked his movement.

"You need a fella!" he admonished.

"Well, I know you're not gonna share! Not this one!" she shot back, then realised what she'd said.

"No. Not this one Toshi," Ianto sighed and all merriment left the room as he remembered the last time someone thought he would share.

The bed he had found her and the man he had never met in had been burned in the local tip and he wondered if she ever knew him at all. Lisa.

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