The Death and Life of Dean Winchester


Dean nearly died in a car accident that killed his little brother, Sam. Years later, Dean is still trying to atone for his loss & is faced with the choice between holding on and letting go.

Age Rating:

The Death and Life of Dean Winchester

Author's Note: This story is based on the novel, The Death and Life of Charlie St. Cloud by Ben Sherwood. Flashbacks are in italics.

Extra Note: In response to a review, Dean died but came back to life therefore when he was in the un-identifiable place I see this as Sam and Dean in between life and death. Because of Dean technically being dead, he can still see Sam, just as he had when he was in the unrecognisable place. No one else can see Sam, only Dean. This story doesn't really follow the mythology of the show. I think that Sam is a part of Dean that's only still there because Dean can't let go because he still feels guilty about the car accident and therefore feels like its still his responsibility to look after his little brother, even after he's passed. And that's what's really emotional about this story, it's knowing that one day you're going to have to move on, but just don't have the strength to do it. Dean doesn't want to lose his little brother, and that drives many of his actions and decisions in the novel.

Dean is 17 and Sam is 13.

The stars were out in the sky above the Impala, as Dean sped down the road.

He turned to Sam, noticing how quiet the kid had been all night. "All right, spill."


"Something's obviously bothering you." Dean stated.

"It's nothing..." Sam answered.

"If it was nothing, then it wouldn't be bothering you."

"You're not gonna' leave, are you Dean?" Sam eventually spoke up.

Dean furrowed an eyebrow. "What? No, of course I'm not gonna' leave."

"It's just you're gonna' get your GED, then you don't have to stick around anymore if you don't want to." Sam sighed.

"Dude, I'm just going away for a week on a road trip. Five states in five days. I'll be back before you know it."

"That's what Dad says." Sam stated.

"Yeah, but I'm not Dad." Dean answered. "I'm not gonna' just ditch you, Sam. I'm not gonna' ditch you."

Sam looked down. "Promise?"

I nodded. "We have a deal."

"What time does the Jayhawks game start?" Asked Dean.

"Nine." Sam answered before looking down at his watch. "We're gonna miss the tip off at this rate." He sighed.

Dean put his foot down on the accelerator. "There's no way we're missing this game!"

Reaching a set of red lights, Dean knew that they couldn't stopping if they wanted to catch the match, so casting a split second decision, he decided not to stop for them. Thinking that the junction was empty, Dean pushed down on the gas.

Of all his reckless decisions that day, this was definitely the worse. As he reached the middle of the junction, Dean saw the perfect image of happiness. Sam's innocent face looking across at him. Then everything changed...

"Dean!" Sam screamed.

Turning instantly, Dean's eyes widened as he noticed a heavy load truck speeding towards the side of the Impala. It's horn blared as it's lights blinded the brothers. And then, there was only fracturing glass, metal, and blackness.

-Third Person POV-

A siren wailed as the emergency services arrived on the scene of the accident. Getting out of his response car, the young paramedic ran over to the vehicle that was mangled and tossed upside down. He could immediately tell from the trail of glass and metal that car had rolled at least twice. Dropping to the pavement, the paramedic turned on his torch and shone it inside the vehicle. The beam of light illuminated two boys, upside down, unconscious and tangled in their seat belts. The oldest looking boy's arms were wrapped around the youngest looking in a bloody embrace.

"We got two traumatic arrests up front." The paramedic quickly radioed in before grabbing a Hurst tool and shoving into the hinges of the door, with another jab of the thumb, the blades took two powerful bites. Pulling the door off, he threw it across the pavement before returning to the car. "I need two C-spine collars, and two short back-boards." The paramedic yelled before entering the wreckage through the now accessible rear of the car. Climbing across the backseat, he rushed over to the younger of the two boys. "Can you hear me?"

No response. No movement.

"Talk to me."

The kid's face and neck ware wet with blood, eyes and lips swollen.

"We need to get them out of here!"

A group of paramedics joined him as the driver's door and the front side door were also ripped from their hinges. As a tall, grey haired man reached into the wreckage, he wrapped a neck brace around the younger boy's neck, strapped on a backboard, then cut the seat belt with a knife. Lowering the boy gently, he pulled him out onto the pavement.

"Pupils are blown." He stated, checking with his flashlight.

The two young victims were now out of the wreckage and lying side by side on back boards.

The paramedic who had been first on the case and his partner, lifted the youngest boy into the ambulance. Followed by the eldest. Another paramedic then joined him in the back of the ambulance before the doors were swung closed, his partner rushed into the driver's seat and sounded the siren before driving off.

-Dean's POV-

In some un-identifiable place, Sam was huddled into my side, shivering and whimpering softly.

"Dad's gonna' kill us." He stated before looking up at me with tearful eyes plagued with fear.

"Don't worry, Sammy. I'm the one who stole the car, remember? This is all on me." I reassured before wrapping my arms around him and pulling him close.

"D'n..." Sam's weak voice broke, struggling to even say my name. "I hurt everywhere."

"I know, Sammy. Just hold on, okay?"

But in truth, I was just as scared as he was (not that I was going to show it). I had no idea what to do or how to get us out of here. Then, in the distance, there was a light. Faint at first, but growing brighter. The light was warm and bright and getting closer.

"What's that?" Asked Sam.

"Help, it's help, Sammy. You're gonna be fine. You hear me? You're gonna be fine." I hoped I was right.

"Please don't leave me, Dean." Sam begged.

"I won't." I stated as everything began to blur.

"Dean!...Dean!" Sam shouted.

"I won't!" I screamed.

Feeling myself awakening once again, I flickered my eyes open to see the paramedic looking down at me with thankful eyes. Looking around, I searched for Sam.

"Hey, hey, hey..." He said, trying to get me to focus on him. "Welcome back."

"Where was I?" I asked.

"It's okay."

"Where was I?"

"You've just got to relax." The paramedic stated.

"Where's Sam?" I asked in a panicked tone.

"Everything's okay, but you gotta stay still." The paramedic reassured.

"Where's Sam?" I asked again.

"You gotta stay still, okay? We don't know the full extent of your injury yet."

Ignoring him, I turned to look across the ambulance. There lay Sam, still on the other bed. "Sam?" His eyes were closed as his small frame looked even smaller. Every part of him was battered and bruised. "Hey, Sam?" The plaid shirt he was wearing was torn to shreds due to the shattered glass. His hand dangled over the edge of the bed. "Sammy?" It took me a few seconds before everything sunk in. "Sammy?" My tone was soft as I reached out across the narrow divide of the ambulance. Pushing my hand past the paramedic who was trying to hold me down, I found Sam's skinny arm. Taking his much colder hand in mine, my eyes widened. "Sammy?..Sam!" I screamed, desperately trying to reach him.

"You've got to rest!" Stated the paramedic as he held me down.

"Sam!" My throat roared in pain from the volume of my screams. Fighting the paramedics hold, I continued to reach for my little brother knowing that I couldn't leave him.

The paramedic grabbed a syringe filled with a clear liquid and removed the cap.

"No! No! No, please! Stop! No!" I cried. As he injected it into my arm, I looked up at him. "That's my brother!" I begged. "Sam!" I screamed. No, this couldn't be happening! He couldn't be dead! "Sammy!"

The paramedic held me down on the gurney.

"I can't leave him." I begged. "I can't leave him." I looked over at my little brother again. "No! Sam!" I screamed, before I slowly felt my eyelids closing.

"Through our Lord, Jesus Christ. God, whose mercies cannot be numbered, accept our prayers on behalf of the soul of they servant departed, and grant him an entrance into the land of light and joy, and the fellowship of thy saints, through Jesus Christ, our Lord. Most merciful Father, who has been pleased to take unto thyself the soul of this thy servant, grant to us, who are still in our pilgrimage, and who walk as yet by faith, in glory everlasting through Jesus Christ, our Lord. Amen." Spoke the Reverend as Sam's coffin was lowered into the grave.

Stood in the graveyard, there were only a few of us. Pastor Jim, Uncle Bobby, Caleb, Dad and I. Dad had been quiet, uncharacteristically quiet since the accident. I couldn't blame him though, he'd already lost the love of his life, and now his youngest son was dead too. And it was my fault. I shouldn't of drove straight out on the junction. This was all my fault.

"Dean?" Spoke the Reverend.

Zoning back in, I turned to him.

"If you want to drop the book in now."

I looked down at my hand. In it, was a Classics Illustrated comic book that I used to read to Sam when he was little. Most of the ones we owned had become lost over various moves, but I still had this one, and this one was his favourite. 'The Knights of the Round Table'.

Reading to Sam had become a regular thing now with Dad vanishing off for longer lengths of time leaving us alone in the motel. Despite the whole tough guy facade that Sam was trying to pull, I could see right through it. He was just a kid, and sometimes Dad forgot that. Even when he was home, he would never pay Sam anywhere close to the amount of attention that a normal kid would get. Always responding with the answer, 'Sorry, Sammy, but I got a lot of work to do'. It only took Sam a few days to realise that he wasn't going to get anything out of Dad. The kid came walking into the room and threw himself down on his bed, burying his head into his pillow. Whatever was in his hand at the time had been discarded onto the floor. I could hear his gentle sobs even though they were muffled by the material of the pillow.

Swinging my legs round the side of my bed, I looked down at the floor. Lying on the carpet, was an old Classic Illustrated comic book that Dad had bought for Sam a couple of weeks ago to shut him up on an eight hour drive. The comic wasn't in the best condition when Dad bought it, but it had only cost a couple of cents. The kid was smart enough, he could easily read it himself, and the look of the comic book now backed me up. Sam had been reading this over and over, he just obviously didn't want to read by himself anymore. He craved attention, and obviously thought that asking Dad to read it to him was his best bet of actually getting some. But once again, Dad had shot him down.

Walking over to Sam's bed, I sat down on the edge and rested a hand on his back. "Hey, Sammy..."

Sam sniffled. "Leave me alone." He answered quietly.

"You just caught Dad on a bad day, Sammy." I stated softly before shuffling along a bit more. "Come here..." Gently lifting Sam up, I sat him down on my knees and wrapped my arms around him pulling him close.

Sam responded my wrapping his little arms around my neck and leaning into me, resting his head against my chest. "Dean, does Dad not like me?" He asked, looking up at me with dewy green eyes, wet with tears.

My heart wrenched. "Of course Dad likes you, Sammy. He's loves you, more than anything in the world. Even me." I cast a hand through Sam's brown curly hair. "Why would you think that?"

Sam shrugged against me.

I wasn't gonna' push the kid for an answer so instead had an idea. "Do you want me to read you your comic book?" I asked.

Sam used the sleeve of his t shirt to wipe away the tears in his eyes. He nodded.

"Okay." Moving up the bed so that we were resting back against the headboard, I placed Sam down beside me.

He huddled into my side.

I wrapped an arm around him while holding the comic book in the other.

The comic book was only small, so it didn't take very long to read. Not that it really mattered.

Sam was snoring lightly against me.

A smile lit up my face as I gently lowered his head to the pillow and scooted off the bed. "Night, Sammy."

Walking up to the edge of the grave, tears began to stream down my cheeks as I slowly dropped the comic book on top of Sam's coffin.

After the service, Caleb and Pastor Jim had left and Dad had walked off leaving Uncle Bobby and I. Reaching the motel room, I opened the door and walked inside before lying back on the bed, rubbing my eyes.

Uncle Bobby winced in sympathy. "Hey, Dean?"

I sat up and looked over at him.

"What happened, it wasn't your fault."

"I stole the car. I was driving too fast. I drove out at the junction." I stated. "How is any of this not my fault?"

"Don't be hard on yourself. Sometimes things just happen." Bobby tried to reassure.

I didn't answer.

"Where's your Dad?" He asked.

"If the last few days are anything to go by, in some bar." I stated.

"He drinking again?"

I nodded.

The door opened. Speak of the devil.

Dad stumbled in, the motel room instantly smelt of cheap booze.


"Get out of here, Bobby." Dad stated sternly.

"I'm ain't leaving Dean here with you. Not in this state." Bobby replied.

"Bobby, it's fine. Honestly." I tried to reassure.

"No, it's not. You have two kids, John. And one of them in hurting and you're turning a blind eye like you usually do. How is getting plastered going to help him? This is just you only thinking about yourself like usual, you selfish dick!" Bobby shouted.

Dad swept his hand across the table sending a glass and some books flying across the floor. "This is my family, not yours!" He shouted in response. "I know you've been wriggling your way in ever since they were kids, but they're not yours!"

"He still is a kid, John. And I became family to those boys the first time you ever dumped them on me so you could go hunt something!"

Dad grabbed Bobby by the collar and shoved him back against the wall.

"Dad, stop!" I shouted, rushing over and trying to pull him off Bobby.

"Shut up!" Dad shouted, backhanding me with enough force to send me flying backwards. Landing on the floor, I put a hand to my lip which was bleeding.

Bobby shoved John off him.

"Get out of here!" Dad warned.

"Not without, Dean." Bobby stated.

"Fine, go." He turned and looked down at me. "But if you walk out that door, don't you ever come back!"

Bobby walked over to me and held out a hand.

Taking it, he pulled me to my feet. Quickly stuffing my stuff into a duffel, I walked out of the door and closed it behind me.

I had been at Bobby's for a few days now. Dad had left countless messages on Bobby's phone apologising and begging me to come back.

Sat on a log in the woods, I felt more alone then ever. The car crash kept repeating itself over and over again as if my brain wanted me to be eternally miserable. Every emotion inside of me was screaming, and I couldn't take it. The first tear fell, followed by the second, and the third, and fourth until I broke out into a sob, burying my head in my hands.

Hearing footsteps, I didn't even look up. It was probably Bobby coming to check up on me to see if I was alright.

The log moved slightly as someone sat down next to me.

Looking up and turning my head, my eyes widened at who I saw.

There was Sam, dressed in the same clothes he was wearing that night, just in the same condition they had been when we had left the motel room before everything that happened, happened.

"Sam?" My weak voice managed to speak.

"I thought we had a deal." Sam stated.

"We do." I nodded, tearfully. "We do have a deal."

Sam smiled.

"We'll meet here everyday just before the sun goes behind the mountains." I explained.

"Promise?" He asked, just as he said that night.

"I promise."

Five Years Later

I was now 23, and working at a mechanic's shop. I was still living with Bobby in Sioux Falls, and Dad hadn't attempted to make contact with me in just over four years. The shop was small, and the guy who owned the place had put me in charge. I was currently working underneath an old Ford.

"You all right Boss man." Mike smiled as he walked in.

I nodded. "Oh you know the guy who brought in the old Lincoln Mark 4 Lipstick Edition the other day for a re-tune. The one where he payed like fourty grand for it with the money he had in his savings account?"

"Yeah?" He nodded.

"He's bringing her back in, apparently his wife thrashed the thing after she found out."

"Why did she trash it?" Mike asked.

"Because the money wasn't from his savings account, it was from hers." I stated.

Mike began to laugh. "You're joking? I shouldn't laugh, it's not funny. Well for him anyway."

Coming out from underneath the car, I grabbed one of the old rags and cleaned my hands roughly with it.

"Oh, I almost forgot, it's me and Cindy's anniversary tomorrow night. We're going to Maddie's. Want to come?"

"Yeah, I'll try." I answered.

"Will you actually try, though?" Mike asked. "Cause' last time, you said you'd try, and you didn't really try. You just ended up here fixin' up old cars."

Hearing a girl shouting from outside the shop, I turned to the door.

"And this time, Cindy had arranged a little friend to meet you." Mike continued, but I wasn't really listening.

She had brown hair and was currently standing in front of her car with the hood open screaming at her engine as if it could hear her calling it a 'bitch!'.

"Are you even listening?" Mike asked. "No, of course you're not."

"Did you get that fuel problem fixed in the Buick?" I asked him.

"Ummm...That would be a no. But it's not my fault this time! Don't look at me like that. It's actually not my fault this time. I tried to fix it, but it's just not happening. The thing is toast." Mike walked over to me. "But more important, all right, listen to me about this. Cindy's got this mate over staying and she is a waitress at the Red Dog Inn."

The girl was now walking towards the shop.

"Dean? The Red Dog Inn. You know where the Red Dog Inn is don't ya'?"

I nodded.

"All right. Okay. So we've been telling her about you, and she really wants to meet you, all right?"

"Hey." The girl walked over.

Mike turned round to face her.

I was stood behind him.

"My car has broke down, again!" She stated.

"And?" Mike shrugged.

"You said you'd fixed it last week."

"Did it splutter a bit then stop, or just stop?" I asked.

"It spluttered then stopped." The girl noticed me.

"I'll get right onto it." I stated.

"Yeah, that would be great." She stuttered. "Thanks." The girl began to walk off.

"Bye." Mike grinned as she walked off. "Anyway..." He turned back to me. "She's a little bit naughty, a little bit saucy, a little bit promiscuous."

I watched as the girl left before turning back to Mike. "Mmm?" I furrowed an eyebrow.

"The waitress, Dean! Please keep up, mate. Red Dog Inn."

I nodded.

My phone beeped.

"Hold on." I stated before walking outside. Flipping open the phone, it was a voicemail message. I pressed play.

'Dean, it's your Dad.' There was a long pause. 'Look, I know I shouldn't have said all those things back then, but you have to believe me when I say I'm sorry.' There was another pause. 'It's been four years, son. I want to see you.' He paused once again. 'You're my boy...And it hurts to not have you around.' His voice was unfaltered so he had obviously threw himself into sobriety after what happened that night in the motel room. 'I've already lost your mother, and Sam...I don't want to loose you too, Dean. So please, if you get this then call me.' He paused. 'I miss you, Dean.'

Returning back to Bobby's later, I showered and changed before walking down the old wooden stairs.

"I'll be back later." I shouted to Bobby before grabbing my leather jacket and some stuff before walking out the door.

Reaching the woods, the sun was just about to go behind the mountains.


I turned to see Sam and smiled. "Hey."

"What's in the bag?" Sam asked.

Taking out a baseball and a glove, I threw the glove to Sam. "Thought we could practice."

Sam smiled.

"Let's go. Now grounders." I stated before throwing the ball at the ground so that it bounced and Sam was able to catch it in the glove.

After a few throws, Sam looked at me.

"What's wrong?" He asked.

"Nothing. Remember, two hands." I instructed.

"It's something bad." Sam stated.

I sighed before throwing the ball back. "Dad rang me today."

"What did he say?" Sam asked softly before throwing the ball.

I caught it. "What he said on the other fifty messages he sent years ago. That he's sorry..." I threw the ball to Sam.

Sam caught it and threw it back.

"That he wants to see me..."

Sam nodded and threw the ball back.

I caught it. "About how he's already lost you and Mom so he doesn't want to loose me." I looked across at Sam. "And that he misses me."

"I'd miss you too, if I was gone." Sam stated.

"Yeah, but that's not gonna' happen." I smiled, walking over to him. "Cause' we got this thing wired."

Sam laughed. "Yeah."

I sat down on the log.

Sam sat down next to me. "So what's her name?"

I furrowed an eyebrow. "What?"

"The girl?"

"How do you?" I began.

"I'm not limited to the woods outside Bobby's house, Dean." He smirked.

"Her name's Lisa Braeden." I stated.

"Oooh." Sam smiled.

"It's not like that."

"So, you don't like her?" Sam raised an eyebrow.

I just looked at him before smacking him across the back of the head with a smirk.

"Charming." He smirked, rubbing his head.

Working on the engine of Lisa's 67' Chevy Impala, it felt strange to be working on one once again. I looked at the clock. '11:23PM'. The problem was easy to diagnose, so now it was just a case of repairing it.

There was a knock on the door. "Dean?"

I turned to see Bobby resting against the frame of the door.

"You planning on coming home anytime?" He asked.

I nodded. "I was just trying to get this fixed up."

"Working yourself into the ground ain't gonna' get it fixed up any quicker." Bobby stated. "Come on."

Back at Bobby's, there was a knock at the door.

Answering it, it was Mike.

"Hey, Dean." He smiled. "You coming?"

"What?" I furrowed an eyebrow.

"It's Cindy and I's anniversary, remember?" He stated.

Oh yeah. I nodded. "Yeah, I remember."

Mike looked me over. "You might wanna' change first."

We'd only just got back so I was still dressed in my boiler suit. I smirked. "Yeah."

Stood by the bar, Mike was on the karaoke across the room singing horrifically.

"Hey!" Cindy walked over with a beaming smile.

"Hey, Cindy." I smiled, pretending like I wasn't bored to death. "Happy anniversary."


"He's really talented." I stated sarcastically, referring to Mike's singing.

"Oh, I know." She rolled her eyes. "Come meet Rachel." She stated.

"Right now?" I asked, not really wanting to.

"Yeah." Cindy took hold of my arm and pulled me over. "Rachel, this is Dean, the one I told you about."

"Hi." I smiled, trying to be polite.

"Cindy said you wouldn't show." Rachel stated.

"Only because we never see you out at night, Dean." Cindy smirked.

"Ohh, emm. Ever since the werewolf bite, I tend to only come out during full moons." I joked.

"The moon isn't full." Boy this one is a bundle of fun.

"Then I guess it's your lucky night." I laughed, before noticing that neither her of Cindy were laughing.

Mike's singing ended. He walked over and hugged Cindy before landing a kiss on her.

-Third Person POV-

Sat at one of the tables outside the bar, Lisa took a drink from her lemonade.

A man walked over and sat down opposite her.

"Hey, Dad." She smiled before she caught sight of Dean standing by the bar.

Her Dad immediately picked up on this. "Hey, why are you so interested in that loon?"

"I'm not." Lisa answered looking back at her Dad. "I ran into him for the first time the other day when my car broke down."


"And he flummoxed me."

"Listen..." Her Dad began. "Everybody in town knows this Winchester kid, totally certifiable." He stated wiggling a finger around in a circle beside his head.

-Dean's POV-

Ralph was talking about something.

I looked around the bar, and noticed Lisa by the door.

She was looking at me too.

"Hey." Ralph put his hand on my shoulder and tried to hand me another shot.

"No thanks, man. I'm good. Thank you." I stated, my eyes going back to her.

"Come on, Winchester, don't be a woman. Have another. It's not like there's a big demand for you as a designated driver."

I turned to him with a stern expression before pushing him backwards and slamming him against the bar, holding him firmly by the collar.

"Hey, Dean!" Mike tried to pull me off him. "Hey, Dean! Let it go." He reassured. "Come on..."

"You want a piece of me you pathetic townie creep?" Ralph taunted. "Your boy just saved you from a beating."

"No, you're probably right." I walked closer to him. "How is everything? How's Goldman Sachs? I heard the layoffs have been pretty brutal."

"Just a better opportunity to weed out the weak." Ralph stated.

"Yeah. But you're good right? Health? Dental."

Ralph nodded.

"Good." I landed a punch across hard across his face.

The crowd in the bar gasped.

I walked off.

Walking into Bobby's, I slammed the door closed behind me.

"And where the hell have you been?" Bobby shouted from the study.

"I'm 23 years old, Bobby. I don't need checking up on." I stated, still angry.

"You Winchester's always need checking up on." Bobby replied. "It's three thirty in the morning."

"I do know that, Bobby! I can tell the time."

"Watch you tone, boy." Bobby walked into the living room and over to me. "You stink of alcohol, Dean! I have two rules. You should at least try to follow them."

"Why? You're not gonna' kick me out, Bobby."

"Don't tempt me. Under my roof, you stick to my rules."

I scoffed. "You sound like my Dad." I looked back up at Bobby.

Bobby's stern expression immediately softened at those words. That was one of the first things he said to me when he brought me here.

"You can stay at my place for as long as you like, Dean. I just have two rules, you have to be home by 1AM and you better not be drunk when you arrive." He stated. "I'm not trying to beat you down with rules like your Dad did, I'm just putting them there so that we're both happy and we won't argue."

I nodded before dropping my duffel down onto the floor.

Bobby turned to me. "Look, I know I'm not really your family." He began.

"Bobby..." I interrupted him. "You're like a Father to me, and you were to Sam too." Dean explained. "And you may not have noticed, but I don't have much family left." I stated in a soft, weak tone.

Bobby's expression softened as he sighed before pulling me into a hug a few seconds later. Patting me on the back, he then pulled away.

"What's the point? I can't do anything right. It was my job to watch out for Sammy, and I screwed that up. It was my job to keep him safe. It was my job to look after him!" I stated as a tear trickled down my cheek. "Everywhere I go, people are talking about me like I'm some freak!" I shouted, my voice beginning to break in sorrow as more tears began to fall. "I just punched a guy at the bar and it felt good."

Bobby furrowed an eyebrow. "What? Who?"



"He told me to have another drink because there wasn't much demand for me as a driver." I stated. "But why would there be? I killed my own brother."

"You didn't kill Sam, Dean." Bobby stated. "You were both in that car accident, and we nearly lost you too." He sighed. "You were flatlined."

"I should've died..." I stated.

"You don't mean that!" Bobby shouted.

I walked up to him. "Look in my eyes and tell me that I don't mean that!" I turned away. "It would have been better for everyone."

Bobby grabbed hold of my arm, turning me back round to face him. "Now you listen!" He shouted. "I would not be the only one who would be torn up if you had died." He stated. "And if you even think about checking out!..." Bobby's voice trailed off before he put his hands on my cheeks so that I was looking at him. "You are a better man that your Daddy ever was, and what happened that night was not your fault. You hear me?"

I nodded.

"Now go sleep it off."

I walked off upstairs.

-Third Person POV-

Bobby watched the oldest Winchester boy walk up the creaky old wooden steps before going out of sight as he walked off down the corridor. Sitting down on the couch, he buried his head in his hands before letting the tears flood out.

The next evening, I was sat on the log in the woods next to Sam.

"Dean's in love." Sam grinned.

"Bite me." I replied.

"Jerk." Sam retorted.

"Bitch." I threw him the glove before standing up. "Now come on."

"Slider?" Sam asked.

"No, I don't feel like retrieving balls today."

Sam smirked before his expression became serious once again. "You should go with her you know."

"Nahh." I shook my head.

"Why not?" Sam asked.

"I wouldn't want to be away for that long?"

"What? If it wasn't for me, you could go?" Sam stated.

"I didn't say that, Sam."

"Don't let me stop you." He replied.

"Oh! Getting angry?" I mocked with a smirk. "Trying to bring the heat, Sammy?"

"The heat? That wasn't the heat? You want the heat?" Sam asked.

"Come on." I smiled. "So scared."

Sam still hadn't thrown the ball.

"Come on, Sammy. Falling asleep here." I pretended to snore.

Suddenly, Sam threw the ball and it struck me hard downstairs. "Ahh!" I moaned, falling to the floor of the woods.

Sam gasped before bursting into laughter.


-Dean's POV-

Working under the hood, I was still fixing the engine of Lisa's Impala.

"Hey!" Came a voice from behind me.

Not being aware of anyone's presence in the shop, I jumped and banged my head off the hood's cover.

"Oh, I'm sorry." Lisa quickly apologised. "I didn't mean to scare you."

"You didn't scare me, I just didn't know you were there." I stated.

She was at the bar last night when I punched Ralph, she obviously had questions.

"I'm harmless, I promise." I reassured. "I'm not..."

"Really?" She asked. "You didn't seem so harmless up at Maddie's."

"Yeah, that, I can explain that."


"Yeah." I nodded, before pausing in an attempt to think of something. "Connors is a dick." I stated.

"Yeah." Lisa nodded. "Always has been."

"Anyways, I should get back to work on your car." I stated after a few seconds of awkward silence.

"Okay." She nodded. "It was nice talking to you."

"You too."

Lisa walked off.

"Dieseling." I shouted after her.

She turned round. "What?"

"That's what's wrong with your car. Dieseling." I stated.

"What have I put Diesel in by mistake?" Lisa asked.

"No." I shook my head. "It's where the car's engine keeps running for a bit even after it's switched off. It's because the fuel's igniting without a spark."

"So, can you fix it?" She asked.

I nodded. "Of course I can, my Dad had one of these things. I used to fix her all the time."

"So what's actually wrong with it?" She walked over.

"I think it's the carburetor. It's not competely closing when the engine is switched off meaning the fuel and oxygen mixture can combust easier in the piston chamber." I explained. "In short, it's easily fixed." I smiled.

"So does your Dad still have his Impala?" Lisa asked.

"No." I shook my head. "It had to be scrapped."

Her expression changed as she caught on. "Oh, I'm sorry..."

"No, no, no...It's okay." I reassured. "Don't worry about it."

"So...I was going to the beach, I was wondering if you wanted to come."


Lisa smiled softly before leaning closer.

I did the same.

Kissing her softly on the lips, she smiled before pulling away. "Let's go." She took hold of my hand.

Sat up on the lighthouse, Lisa was resting against my side. I had my arms wrapped around her.

"So, I'm...Ummm...I'm going away for a week, on a roadtrip." Lisa stated.

"Oh...That's cool."

"Yeah, I'm going North. Down the highway." She smiled. "Is there any chance that my Impala will be fixed before tomorrow morning?"

I nodded. "I'll have her done by tonight."

"Thanks. I'll pick her up tomorrow then." Lisa stated.

"So when are you back?" I asked.


I nodded.

"I wish you could come with me." She stated softly.

"I can't." I answered.

"Why? Come on, you don't have any holidays?"

"I just can't."

"You just can't?"

I sighed. "I just can't." I turned away and looked towards the mountains, suddenly, my eyes widened. The sun was already dissapearing behind them. "Oh, shit!" I quickly got to my feet.

"What?" Lisa furrowed an eyebrow.

"Nothing. I left something at work." I lied.

"What? Well, hold on, I'll come with you." She stated.

"No. I won't be long." I climbed down the lighthouse and sprinted off.

Running through the forest, I reached the clearing with the log and looked around. "Sam! Sammy!" I shouted.

Sam was in the distance, walking away.


He kept walking.

"Sam, stop!" I repeated, closing most of the gap between me and him.

Sam slowly turned around. I could instantly see the tears in his eyes. "You're late." His weak, saddened voice stated.

"I couldn't...I couldn't help it, Sam. I'm sorry." I apologised.

"I knew you'd be late." Sam stated. "I could...I could feel you forgetting me."

"No, Sam..." I began softly.

"Without you, I feel myself starting to disappear." He stated as tears began to trickle down his cheeks. "Be nothing."

"There's nothing to be scared of, Sam." I reassured.

"Do you want me to go?" Sam asked.

"No." I stated, shaking my head.

"Then why did you bring her?" Sam shouted.

I turned to see Lisa walking through the woods into the clearing.

"I didn't mean to spy on you." She explained.

Turning back, Sam was gone.

"Dean, it's okay."

I turned back to Lisa. "Sam and I made a deal."

"You don't have to explain anything to me." She walked closer.

"No, we made a...We made a pact..." I explained.

"You don't..."

"That everyday we meet here just before the sun goes behind the mountains." I stated.

"Dean." Lisa spoke softly.

"I can't lose Sam, Lisa." I stated. "I can't lose Sam."

"Let's go."

I shook my head.

"Let's go."

"No." I shook my head once again. "The more I'm in your world, the less I can be in his."

"Dean, at some point, we all have to let go." Lisa stated softly.

"I can't lose Sam." I turned and began walking away. "Goodbye, Lisa. Enjoy your roadtrip."

It had been three days since I last saw Lisa. Sat in the cafe next to Mike, two sheriffs walked in.

"We gotta' local missing." They stated.

"Who?" I asked.

"Lisa Braeden." He answered.

"According to her Father, she left on a roadtrip three days ago. Nobody's seen her since and with all the bad weather we've been having, he's obviously worried. We've been trying to contact her, but she's not answering. Phone's going straight to voicemail."

Sat on the log in the woods, Sam was standing in front of me. "She's missing, that girl." I paused. "Lisa."

Sam sighed.

"She went driving out on a roadtrip in her car, and then the storm hit. She's hasn't come back, and she hasn't been in contact for days."

Sam sat down next to me on the log. "You still got me."

"Yeah, I know, man."

Getting back to Bobby's, I opened the door and walked inside. There was a note pinned to the wall.

'Gone out for a bit. There's food in the fridge. You've been quiet for a few days, Dean. I know you're still dealing with everything that happened back then, but you gotta remember. You got the second chance, don't waste it moping around for the rest of your life. ~Bobby / P.S. This was under the door when I came in earlier.' Pinned next to it was a note in Lisa's handwriting which read 'Come Find Me!'.

"Shit!" Grabbing a notepad, I quickly wrote Bobby a message saying I would be back in a few days and not to worry. Making one stop, I ran out of the house and into the salvage yard. Climbing into the first car I saw, I sped off.

Lisa said she was heading North, down the highway.

Heading North, I accelerated down the highway while keeping a look out.

The rain had set in again, making visibility low. I had been driving for hours with no luck. She could be anywhere.

Suddenly, I spotted something reflecting in the light from the headlights. Quickly pulling over, my eyes widened as I spotted it. Lisa's black 67' Chevy Impala stuck half in the ditch at the side of the road and half out of it. Getting out of the car, I rushed over and descended down the ditch to the front of the car. When the storm hit, she must have lost controlled and swerved ending up ditching her. I peered through the window.

There was Lisa lying dangerously still across the front bench with blood staining her hair.

"Lisa!" I shouted, banging on the window. "Lisa!"

No use. Taking my old gun of of my pocket, I fired at the window causing it to shatter. I then pulled up the lock and opened the door before gently lifting Lisa into my arms. She was a dead weight.

Getting into the car, I sat down on the bench before resting Lisa down so that her head was resting in my lap. Putting a finger to her neck, I was relieved to find a pulse. Her breathing was weak, but I would take that over dead any day.

Lisa shivered.

I quickly turned the dial of the heater, and smiled thankfully when it was still working. Taking off my leather jacket, I placed it over her as a blanket before wrapping my arms around her for warmth. Taking my phone out of my pocket, I ran Bobby.

"Dean?" He answered in a panicked tone.

"I found her, Bobby. I found Lisa."

As I waited for help to arrive, my thoughts turned to Sam. The sun had already set now meaning that he was alone.

"I love you, Sam." I sighed.

Sirens wailed in the distance before stopping as they became closer.

A paramedic ran over and removed me from the car before him and the other paramedics began helping Lisa.

A hand was placed on my shoulder. I turned to see Bobby. He immediately bundled me into a hug. "Don't ever do that to me again." He stated in a relieved tone and I was sure that I could even here the old coot sniffling.

Lisa was released from hospital in a couple of days, and in that time, I had managed to fix up her Impala. So when she got out of hospital, I was waiting.

"Surprise." I stated with a smile, motioning to the car.

She grinned. "How did you?"

"Like I said, I used to fix her up alot."

Lisa pecked me softly on the lips.

I smiled. "Also, I've been checking the weather forecast, and this week looks really good. Perfect for a roadtrip."

Lisa smiled.

My phone began to ring.

"Hi Bobby." I answered.

"Don't even think about leavin' without saying goodbye." He warned.

"I wouldn't dream of it." I laughed. "I'll be round in a minute." I hung up.

"I gotta' say goodbye to the old man." I explained.

"Well I've gotta' pack anyway so I'll meet you there." Lisa smiled.

I nodded before throwing her the keys.

Reaching Bobby's, I opened the door and walked inside.

My eyes widened. There stood in the living room, was Dad. "Dad?"

"Hey, Dean." He answered in a soft tone with a smile. "Last time we were together, we had one hell of a fight."

I nodded. "Yes, sir."

"It's good to see you again. It's been a long time."

"Too long." I walked over as he wrapped his arms around me in a tight, emotional embrace. Tears were running down my cheeks, and I was sure that they were trickling down his too. We pulled apart.

Bobby smiled as he watched the two Winchester's reunite.

I walked over to Bobby. "Thank you." I smiled before pulling into a hug.

"What for?" He asked.

"Looking after me, and setting me straight when I was being a dick." I smiled before pulling away.

"Now you take care of yourself, you hear?" Bobby smiled.

I nodded.

A car horn honked outside.

Bobby handed me my duffel.

"Have fun, Dean." Dad smiled.

I nodded before walking out of the house and down the path to the Impala.

Lisa scooted along the bench.

I climbed into the driver's seat before looking back at the house.

Dad and Bobby were standing at the door.

I waved. "Bye."

"Bye." Lisa waved.

They both waved back as I drove off in the sunset.

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