Oh My Chuck!
Stunned silence. Slow blinking. A fly flew into a window. Identical confused looks as we try to make sense of what we just heard. Chuck watched us patiently as our brains processed the information. It was so quiet you could practically hear the gears turning in each of our heads.
Dean is the first to come out of the shock, denial evident on his face. "No, no that’s not right. Cas would have found you by now, that's why he took my necklace. Besides, you're just a prophet, there is no way you could be God."
He sighed sadly, shaking his head. "You know what the worst part of being God is? People telling you, to your face no less, that they don't believe you. Listen my children; I know this is a lot to take in. The amulet didn't work because I didn't want it to. I didn’t want to be found. Now before you get mad just hear me out."
Dean had his fists clenched and if this was a cartoon there would probably be steam coming out of his ears. Gabriel had a mask of indifference, showing no emotion. I was still in way too much shock to say anything. That left Sam to be the voice of us, for now at least until the rest of us had come to terms with what we just heard.
"Hey Cas, you listening? You might wanna come here, quickly." We waited. And waited. Nothing, no sign of the angel. "Cas we found God, get over here."
Not two seconds later there was the unmistakable sound of angel wings flapping and the holy tax accountant appeared before us. "What do you mean you found God? Where is my father?" He glanced around expectantly as though we were hiding him behind a corner or something.
None of us were really able to talk, we were all still trying to wrap our minds around the fact that God was standing right in front of us. Instead of communicating through words we each raised a hand and pointed silently at Chuck.
Cas tilted his head, eyeing the prophet. "If this is truly my father then why is Dean's necklace not burning?" He took the said necklace out of his trench coat pocket, staring at it as though it had all the answers.
"Ah, right." Chuck commented as though he had just remembered. He slightly nodded his head, causing the amulet to glow and burn enough to make Castiel drop the offending piece of jewelry.
Chuck cringed as he realized he had just burned one of his more favored angels. “Sorry.” He hardly had to do much more than blink to heal the burned skin on Castiel’s vessel. He then turned to Gabriel, a shadow of a smile just barely on his lips. “Gabriel, the third angel I created and one of my four archangels. You are one of the few Angels that I have allowed to see and speak to me in Heaven. Tell me, do you not recognize me?” Chuck’s body appeared to flicker for a moment, letting loose just enough godly energy to reveal himself but not enough to burn out our eyes, but it seemed to be all that was needed to convince Gabriel.
I glanced up to Gabriel’s face, realizing that what I had originally been a mask of indifference was just a facade, but all the pain of loss and betrayal shone through his eyes. “Father. You left us to fend for ourselves. You drove half of us mad by disappearing like that. And now I see you posing as human?”
Chuck, God, whatever you wanted to call him, looked down ashamedly and bit his lip. “I know that I have caused you and many others great pain. But I did what had to be done. I came down to earth as human, or at least disguised as human. I had buried my memories of being the Creator and replaced them with false memories of a lonely human life. Of course I could not completely erase who I am; Bits and pieces came to me in dreams, enough to make me have the knowledge of a prophet, no more. But slowly the memories of my true self came back to me, and fairly recently too. Not too long before Dean called me in fact.”
Cas looked about as broken as Gabriel did, if not more so seeing as Gabriel was slightly better at hiding emotions because he was more used to them than his younger brother. He looked at his father with pain evident in his watery eyes. “There is war up at home. Several of my brothers and sisters have slain each other. So many have died, so many good soldiers and old friends lost. And you sit here drinking beer and writing book with no care about what has happened? This is your fault, you left and war has started. All those deaths, they are on your hands!” As he spoke his voice rose in anger.
Dean seemed to notice Cas was about at his breaking point, able to snap at any second. He placed a hand on the dark haired angels arm, holding him back. “Cas, man, calm down. I mean this is freaking God here, don’t do anything you will regret.” Cas was an angel, as old as the earth if not longer and with just as much time fighting as a soldier of God. He could have easily pushed a human out of the way; he could have easily smote him on the spot. But he allowed Dean to calm him, at least enough as to not kill anything. His eyes still shone with rage at his father and if looks could kill, well it would not be a happy ending for Chuck.
“Why?” I asked in a small voice. I cleared my throat, trying again, this time it came out far more confidant that I felt. “Why now? Why come to earth, why leave Heaven? You must have known what it would do to your family, and yet you still left.”
He was unable to meet my eyes. He felt guilty. Good, he should feel all the guilt in the world for causing that pained look in Gabriel’s eyes. And all the other angels. “Because of the apocalypse, of course. I came down to do what I could to ensure that Michael wins. I came down to give one last gift to humanity before the end, one last chance. And I left because my angels, as much as I love you, became too dependent on me. I had hoped that by me leaving it would force them to think for themselves, not just be soldiers. Gabriel, you have spent a fair amount of time on earth, learning from the humans. You have made friends and allies. You even fell in love with one. And Castiel, ever since you raised Dean from perdition you have been given the greatest gift I have to offer. Free will, emotion. Both of you chose your own path, made your own choices. I had hoped that by me leaving Heaven for a short period of time the others would have learned the same valuable lessons you two have. Sadly, I was mistaken.”
Gabriel was practically shaking with rage. “You left to teach us a lesson? You abandoned us, knowing that we would not take kindly to that, so you could live a carefree life as human? Did you think about us? Even once care to wonder what the side effects would be?”
Chuck, shocked at Gabriel’s outburst, took a step backwards. “Calm down Gabriel. When I willed myself to become human I got everything that came with. I know these new emotions might have clouded my judgment a little but-”
Gabriel let out a dark humorless laugh. “When you became human? You think that’s all this is about? No, the problems started far before you came to Earth. Do you have any idea how hard it was for us even while you were still in power? You only spoke to four of us face to face, I just happen to be one of the lucky few. But even when I knew you better than most, I still hardly knew you. My brother, Lucifer, he practically raised me when I was a fledgling. He taught me all I know, told me his secrets and taught me his tricks. It should have been you, teaching me, guiding me. You should have been there for all of us. But after you raised Michael and Lucifer you stopped being a father. I get it; it’s not easy being God and controlling all of Heaven. But it wouldn’t have killed you to at least visit each of us once. Castiel has dedicated the past several weeks to trying to find you and I doubt you even cared to learn his name before he met the Winchesters.”
So many emotions passed God’s face. Guilt, sadness, surprise, offended, humiliation, even a glint of anger at being called out like that. “You are mad.” He stated simply.
“No. I’m downright pissed. You leave us, creating a civil war up there, and now you come back and expect us to start bowing at your feet? No, not this time. This time it is you that should be asking for our forgiveness.” Surprisingly Chuck took the insults rather well. He could have easily killed Gabriel for speaking such things directly to his face, but he did not. Instead his face fell more and more, it was obvious he knew he had done wrong and would not be able to fix it.
Cas, as mad as he was with his father, even looked a little surprised at the words leaking out of his older brother’s mouth. I took a step forward and grabbed Gabriel’s hand, partially to calm him down and partially to draw his attention away from wanting to vaporize God. ‘Just take a deep breath, try to calm down. Remember the last time an angel disagreed with him? I don’t want you to end up like Lucifer.’ I almost added ‘and I don’t want you to be taken away from me’ to my silent prayer, but thought better of it. Besides, if I did not like it was going to convince him more. According to God he was already in love with someone, and it obviously wasn't me so my words would mean nothing to him.
Dean was keeping his angel under control, and I was attempting to do the same with mine. So of course that left Sam to do the talking. Again. I would have to apologize to him about this later. “You said you came back to give one last gift to humanity? What is it? Because if it’s the books let me tell you they aren’t all that popular, no offence.”
Chuck shook his head, waving Sam’s words off. “None taken. Anyways no, it is not the books. In fact the gift is right here in this room.” We all glanced around; looking for anything that looked like it could help our chances in winning this war. Chuck rolled his eyes and shook his head in disappointment. Apparently we were too stupid to figure it out. He looked me straight in the eyes for the first time since I walked into his house. “My last gift and your last chance is her. Abigall Spiers, the human who will stop the end of the world.”
That name sounded vaguely familiar. Abigall Spiers, now where had I heard that name before? After a short moment I realized that everyone gathered in the room was staring at me with an intense gaze. Ah, that’s right. Abigall Spiers, that’s my name. Oh shit. No, I must have misheard him; he couldn’t possibly be talking about plain old me. No way. I sure as Hell was not some ‘last gift’ or whatever. “No way. There is some mistake, I’m nothing special. I’m just a small town girl from Ohio, plain and boring.” I desperately tried to convince them, I didn’t want to be anyone’s last hope at ending the apocalypse. With my luck I would screw it up.
“And that’s where it gets tricky. Yes you were born human, but if you accept you can become much more than that.” Chuck intervened.
I narrowed my eyes at the all powerful God. “What do you mean accept? Accept what?”
Chuck sighed; I could tell he was getting tired of explaining everything. “Accept who you are. See as God I know everything, see all possibilities. I saw that you would be a very righteous girl; I just gave you the ability to take that and do more with it. I saw what Azazel would do to Sam, so I retaliated, in my own way.”
Sam eyed me curiously. “So…She has your blood flowing through her veins?” Well at least I wasn’t completely alone here, Sam could symphonize with me.
“Not exactly. I gave her my blessing.” The way he said it he made it sound like a big deal. And I’m sure it was, if only I knew what it meant. By the looks Gabriel and Castiel were exchanging I could tell it was something not to be taken lightly. Right, okay. Fantastic. Was anyone going to tell me what that meant?
Dean looked about as confused as I felt. “Someone wanna tell me what the hell he means by that?” He looked to Cas for an answer.
“It means,” He started, thinking over the best way to explain what exactly I was, “She is powerful. A blessing from God is rare, almost unheard of."
Gabriel looked down at me, like he had finally figured me out. “That makes sense. That’s why I was ordered to get you out of Hell.” He turned to Chuck accusingly. “But why make her suffer for over three years? She didn’t deserve any of that. Why didn’t you make me get her out sooner?”
Chuck looked slightly uncomfortable. “Well I was still human when that order was sent out. It was my subconscious deciding it was time to get her out. Of course if I had realized it was that big of a deal to you I would have made it top priority to get her out sooner. If it makes you feel better she was able to handle it due to my blessing. Dean, as strong willed as he is, was only able to last thirty years before giving in to the offer. Abigall was able to last three hundred and sixty three years without giving in or becoming a demon."
"Oh yeah, no harm done." I stated sarcastically. Okay, I was pissed, just like the others in the room. "Just the fact that I remember practically every second of torture and am scarred for life. The only reason I'm not plagued by nightmares every night is because Gabriel uses his angel mojo on me before I fall asleep."
"I am sorry Abigall Spiers." And Chuck did sound sorry, and I could tell by the look in his eyes he was telling me at least half the truth. "But I was not certain you would be needed. I was confidant at first that Sam and Dean would be able to do it alone, but as soon as I realized I was wrong I sent out the order for you to be resurrected."
"So what? I’m just a piece on your chess board for you to do with as you wish?" As mad as I was I did want to try to understand what was going on. If I was 'blessed' or whatever I wanted to make sure I knew exactly what I was capable of.
"Not just any piece." Chuck corrected. "The strongest piece, you are the queen. But it is your choice; I'm not forcing you to do anything." But judging from his tone I knew he was expecting me to say yes. My friends would probably be disappointed with me if I didn't jump at the chance to end this war.
I sighed, already partially giving in. I cut off Gabriel who looked like he was about to protest, probably guessing what I would say. "So what exactly can I do if I accept?"
"Well from what I have written you have already used a little bit of the powers granted to you, although subconsciously. Like how you could see Gabriel's true form? Yeah, you’re welcome for that." He smiled smugly, as if the fact that I was given that gift would make me any less pissed about the whole situation. "And when you made Lucifer run away just by talking? Any supernatural bring can SENCE the power you have, even if they don't know exactly what you are. But you have basically all the powers my angels have, plus a few extras. You can smite demons and monsters by simply willing them to be dead; you don't actually have to face them in battle. You are not weakened by sigils, like an angel can be. Your wounds will heal faster than normal, and if Gabriel wasn't constantly at your side to heal you I am sure you would have realized that by now. Like an angel you can heal others and appear wherever you wish in the blink of an eye." He glanced at me, waiting for my reaction.
I was about to protest that no human should be granted that amount of power when I got an idea. "So I'm kind of like a girl version of Jesus? I can just walk up to Satan and tell him to die and he will?"
Chuck thought it over. "More or less. You are more like an exceptionally powerful angel than you are like Jesus. And no, Lucifer is still an angel. A fallen one who is in charge of hell, but an angel no less."
I nodded. "Okay what's the catch? You give me all this power, give me the opportunity to kill the devil for good, but it can't be without a sacrifice. If I say yes what am I giving up?"
"Abby no! You can't seriously be considering this!" Dean complained but I silenced him with a glare.
"You are correct, it is not all glamorous." Chuck agreed with a sigh. "Just like you are the one destined to kill him, he is the only one that can kill you. You were born human so you can bleed and feel pain and get sick like one, but if he kills you then that's it, end of story. No heaven, no hell, you will just stop existing. If something else kills you, you will go to heaven and can choose to live again as often as you like. But if Lucifer kills you, there is no coming back."
Harsh terms, but I suppose if it could save the world then how important was I really? I would have said yes right then and there, but the look on my angels face stopped me. It was filled with so much emotion that I couldn't place all of them; I just knew that I could not say yes with him looking at me like that. "Do I have to decide right now? I mean is it possible for me to have a few hours to think about this?"
He nodded. “Of course, take all the time you need. There are a few guest rooms upstairs, take your pick.”
I nodded my thanks before practically running up the stairs without another word. I found a room and threw myself into the bed. What was I supposed to do? Chuck just said that I was the only one who could kill Lucifer. And I was fine with that, honestly I was. But when God mentioned that he could kill me too and there would be no returning, that look that Gabriel had shot me practically killed me. How could I leave him? How could I leave any of them? Sam and Dean were like my brothers and I knew that they would care at least a little if I were gone for good. Even Castiel might miss me a little even though he didn't quite know me as well as the others. And Bobby had taken over as a father figure in my life; surely he wouldn't want me to just be gone?
And then of course there was Gabriel. I honestly wasn’t sure how he would react, but I could tell from that look in his eyes that he wouldn’t take kindly to me willingly dying at his brothers’ hand. I honestly didn’t know what to do about him. Sure there were those times when I had allowed mu mind to wander and think that just maybe it could work out... but every time I dismissed the idea just as quickly as it came. He was a freaking archangel, I was just a human. Apparently a 'blessed' human, but still just a human.
Not too long after I had gotten to the room there was a soft knock on the door before Sam slowly pushed it open and he and Dean walked in. They silently walked over to me, each of them sitting on either side of me on the bed.
We sat there for a while, Dean with his arm around me in a half hug and Sam holding my hand, rubbing small comforting circles against the back of my hand.
It was a while before any of us spoke; I was the one to break the silence. "Where are Gabriel and Castiel?"
"Still downstairs." Dean answered. "We decided to let them have a word alone with their father.
I nodded. "What do I do?" I probably sounded like a sad pathetic five year old, but at the moment I didn't care. "What would you do?"
Sam sighed, trying to find the best way to talk me out of what we all knew my decision would be. "You don't have to do this Abby, you know that right? Just because Dean and I would gladly sacrifice ourselves, doesn’t mean you have to. You got out of hell; you got a second chance at life. You can still walk away, live that life you deserve."
I looked up at Dean, waiting for his answer. "If we could take this away from you, make us the cursed ones instead, we would. If there was anything we could do to make you not have to do this we would do it in a heartbeat. Like Sammy here said, you broke free of hell; we don't want you going back."
"That’s just it though." I argued. Judging by the confused looks the brothers shot me I could tell they didn’t know exactly where I was going with this. "I was brought out. Gabriel dragged me out. There was a reason I was allowed to be freed Dean. I have to do this. Sam I'm sorry, but I already lived a normal life before I went down there, I can’t run back to it now."
I knew they both wanted to protest, but neither did. I knew as well as they did that that would do the same thing in my situation. We sat in silence for a few minutes, none of us sure what to say. Of course all good things come to an end; we were drawn out of our peaceful comforting moment by the sound of raised voices coming from downstairs.
Dean shifted uncomfortably as he removed his arm from around me. "I'll go and break this up before they try to kill each other." Sam and I nodded in agreement as we watched him leave the room.
After he left I glanced at Sam, it was obvious that he had something he was dying to get off his chest. "Just spit it out Sammy, what's on your mind?"
"Look Abby, you know we care about you, right? You are like a little sister to Dean and I." I nodded slowly, wondering where he was going with this. "Well you are more than that to Gabriel. So be careful if you accept, if not for your sake then for his."
I looked up at him, confused. "What do you mean I mean more to him?"
Sam blinked slowly. "You really don't know?" I shook my head, confirming his thoughts. Sam rolled his eyes. "Well for anyone who has seen you two together it’s fairly obvious he loves you. He tells you that all the time."
"Gabriel has never told me he loves me Sam." I stated, my confusion growing with each word.
"There are a thousand ways to tell someone you love them. ‘Stay safe. Get some rest. I'll protect you.' Sometimes you don’t actually have to say it to say it. Just little things like that to show you care can be enough to tell how someone feels about you. And Gabriel says as much to you practically every day."
"That’s not possible." I dismissed the thought again, no point in giving myself hope where there is none. "He is an archangel; I'm just a fragile needy human."
Sam sighed and shook his head. "You never do give yourself enough credit, you know that right?"
The voices downstairs stopped and with a flutter of wings the angel in question was leaning against the doorframe. Sam let go of my hand and got off the bed. "I should go make sure Dean and Castiel are okay." With that he left the room, slightly pushing Gabriel out of his way.
"Is everything okay?" I asked my angel, knowing it was a stupid question and of course nothing was okay. "What was all that shouting about? What happened down there?"
Gabriel sighed and ran a hand through his hair before walking over to me and taking Sam's place on my right. “Just family drama, father abandonment issues, nothing for you to worry about. But there is something you should probably know.”
“Okay?” I asked, waiting for him to continue.
“You know how he said you were kind of like an angel, powerful and all that?” He waited for me to nod to show that I was following his train of thought. “Well there is something else that he conveniently forgot to tell you. Not only are you powerful like one, but you also have the lifespan as one.”
I blinked slowly, waiting or the information to sink in. “You mean I’m immortal? Like I live forever unless the devil kills me?” He nodded. Well shit, why would I want to live forever? Watch as all my friends’ age and die while I’m still stuck here? Who would want that? But Gabriel was immortal too, as was Cas. So I guess I wouldn’t be completely alone for all eternity. But still, Sam and Dean were mortal; I would have to watch my adopted brothers die. How could I live with that?”
“Only if you accept that is.” He quickly reassured me. “Right now you are still as fragile as the next human.”
“Is there anything else I should know?” I looked up into those beautiful golden eyes of his, trusting him not to lie to me.
“I think that’s it, he told you everything else.”
I nodded. There was too much to think about and decide on right now. “Thanks Gabriel, for everything. It means a lot to me that I have you as a friend.” I wasn’t looking at him so I wasn’t sure what his reaction was, but I could have sworn I felt him tense up slightly beside me. I turned my head slightly to look back at him and his face quickly changed into one of his bright smiles. “Do you think God would mind if I waited until tomorrow to give him an answer? It’s just there is a lot to take in and I need to think about a lot of things…”
“Of course he won’t mind, he did tell you to take all the time you needed.” I nodded and yawned. “You tired?”
“Yeah sorry, long day.”
He nodded understandingly. “Common, get some rest. You deserve it.”
I nodded. Too lazy and tired to get under the covers, I curled myself into Gabriel’s warm chest and closed my eyes. Sam’s words from earlier rang in my head quietly, but were quickly forgotten as the angel pressed his lips softly to my temple, delivering me into a peaceful dreamless sleep.
The sun peaking through the curtains woke me up. I was aware of two things. One, that was the best night’s sleep I had gotten in forever even though Gabriel always used his angel mojo to make sure I slept well. And two, I was still curled around the angel in question.
As an angel I guess he didn’t need to sleep because when I looked up at his face his eyes were open and staring at the ceiling. He shifted his eyes to me when he felt me stirring. “Hey. Sleep well?” he questioned, a slight smile on his lips.
“Yeah.” I responded. “Fantastically. Thanks for that by the way. And for every night.”
He shrugged. “What are friends for?”
I smiled and slowly, unwillingly, sat up, breaking the contact of our bodies. “I think I decided on what I’m going to do.”
“Yeah?” He asked with a slight undertone of fear in his voice. “And what’s that?”
“I’m going to say yes.”
“Don’t.” I cut him off. “Just let me explain, okay? It’s not like I want to be murdered by Satan, believe me I don’t. But I have to do this. For you. For Sam and Dean, Cas and Bobby. I have to do this. You heard Chuck; I’m the only one who can do this. I don’t know why I was chosen out of all the people on this planet, but that’s just the thing. There are billions of people alive, and if I don’t do this your brother will kill them all. It’s no secret we are nothing but disposable ants to him and he won’t hesitate to wipe out the human race. I have to do this Gabriel, if there is even the slightest chance that I can do something, help in some way, I will. You all have done so much to keep me alive, it’s about time I return the favor. I will do everything in my power to keep you and Sam and Dean and Castiel and Bobby alive. I’m going to say yes, and you can’t stop me.” Wow, okay, I sure had not meant to say all that. But I was glad I did. I crossed my arms in front of my chest trying to look threatening but knowing I was failing miserably, daring Gabriel to protest.
After a few seconds he let out a long defeated sigh, knowing he had lost this one. “I sure hope you know what you’re doing Abby. Just know that if we can’t stop you from saying yes then you can’t stop us from going with you. We will be fighting by your side, doing whatever we can to help. I will protect you Abigall Spiers, I’m not loosing you.”
After pushing Gabriel out of the room so I could change into a clean outfit and brush out my tangled dirty blonde hair so as to look at least a little presentable, I wandered downstairs to see the two brothers and the two angels sitting around Chuck’s circular table. Chuck had poured them each a cup of coffee, although Gabriel’s looked to be ninety percent sugar. Sam and Dean slowly sipped theirs, too tired to complain about it. Cas just stared at his without blinking. And then there was Chuck, standing in front of the stove and frying bacon and eggs. Kind of funny actually, never would have pictured God to be doing something as domestic as cooking.
I slipped into the empty seat between Castiel and Gabriel. The dark haired angel pushed his untouched cup of coffee towards me and I offered him a small smile in return. I reached for the sugar and spooned myself enough to make the drink taste good, but far less than Gabriel had in his. Nobody talked as Chuck came around the table and placed a plate full of breakfast food in front of each of us.
This was the first meal I had eaten in forever without praying and saying my thanks for blessing me with food, but somehow it made me uncomfortable to pray with God himself sitting across from me. I used about as much pepper on my eggs as Gabriel used sugar in his coffee and began to eat. The bacon was just the right amount of crunchy and the eggs were cooked to perfection. Even the toast, although slightly burnt, wasn’t completely horrible.
We all ate in silence, but it was way more comfortable than last night. Most of the tension seemed to have eased up and I was thankful for that. Whatever they were yelling about last night they seemed to have gotten most of it off their chest because everyone seemed content as they ate. Castiel even took a few courtesy bites so as not to offend his father even though angels didn’t require food. After Gabriel finished his plate he snapped his fingers, creating a large plate of chocolate chip pancakes drenched in syrup. I rolled my eyes but said nothing. How great it must be to be an angel and never gain weight.
Once we had all finished our food and cleared our plates we returned to the table, glancing at each other, waiting for one of us to be the first to speak.
Chuck cleared his throat, effectively cutting through the silence and gaining all of our attentions. “So um Abigall… Have you decided what you are going to do yet?”
I nodded. “Yes. I will accept the blessing and do what I need to do.” Chuck was starting to smile, believing he had won. “But you have to do something first.” I spoke way more confidently than I felt.
“And what is it you require of me?” He asked shocked. He was probably expecting me to just go along quietly without protesting. Ha, yeah right.
“Castiel and Gabriel explained to me once what heaven was like. Each human that goes up there had their own personal little space where the relive a good memory. Is that true?”
He nodded hesitantly, not sure where I was going with this. “Yes…”
“Well that’s fine and all, but I don’t agree. I don’t think they should be alone up there. Heaven is supposed to be where you are reunited with deceased family and friends; at least that’s what they led us to believe in church.”
God sighed. “What is it exactly that you are asking of me?”
I bit my lip, trying to word it right. I kind of didn’t want to piss him off and change his mind about the whole ‘blessing’ thing and smite me on the spot. “I think you should let friends and families see each other. Let them enter each others heaven, let them smile and laugh and be together again. They can still each have their own little place, but they should be able to travel and go around to the heavens of those they love.”
“You want me to give them free roaming of heaven and go wherever they want?” He questioned, trying to put it all together.
I nodded, trying to sound strong and confidant. “Yes. They should be able to enter their friends and families heavens, with their permission of course.”
God sighed and snapped his fingers. “There, it’s done. Is there anything else you want from me?”
I was probably asking too much but oh well, why the hell not, right? “Just one more thing. When this is all over, when Lucifer is dead and the world is clean again, I want to be able to give up the blessing. I was born human, and I had intended to die as one. I don’t want to live forever, when all this is over I want to be able to give up this blessing and go up to heaven with my friends and family.”
“Of all the things you could ask for you choose such simple things.” He smiled slightly. “Yes, I will allow you to get rid of it whenever you want. When you feel as though you have lived too long you may go up and be reunited with your friends.”
“Thank you.” I nodded, relived and slightly surprised that he had actually accepted my terms. “Okay I’m ready. What exactly do I have to do to accept it?”
God stood up and used his hand to beckon me to stand up as well and follow him. I did as he told me and the others followed suit. He turned to face me, trying to hide his smile. Of course he was happy, his thoughts were probably something along the lines of ‘Abby said yes, now let’s get her ready and send her off to her death. Hooray!’
“Okay, so to accept it you have to actually mean it.” He began explaining. “Just close your eyes and accept it, but you have to actually want to accept it for it to work.”
I closed my eyes and tried to do what was instructed. I thought back to earlier this morning when I had told Gabriel exactly why I was going to say yes. I thought of Sam and Dean and how I loved them as though they were my own brothers. I thought of Bobby and how I had started to think of him as my father and mentor. I thought of Castiel and the unspoken friendship we had. I thought of Gabriel, every memory I had of him and how I always felt safe when around him. Feeling and hoping that this was good enough, I accepted the blessing.
I felt as the warmth spread through my body, making me feel complete and powerful as it did when I was talking to Lucifer. I felt a tingling start in my fingertips and spread up my arms and reach my heart. I felt as though I was being weighed down by a thousand pounds but at the same time I felt as though I was floating. When it was over I felt…Amazing to say the least. I can’t describe exactly how it felt; there was too much going on at once. But I knew it had worked. I knew I now officially had God’s blessing. And I knew the pros and cons of my decision.
I slowly opened my eyes to see them all staring at me. Castiel and Gabriel were both looking at me in awe and Chuck was smiling proudly. Sam and Dean didn’t look any different than when I had closed my eyes.
“Did it work?” Dean whispered out of the corner of his mouth to his brother. “I mean there was no flickering lights, no sudden burst of light, shouldn’t something have happened?”
“Oh it worked all right.” God responded. “You two can’t see it but those two can.” He pointed at his sons. “As a matter of fact any and all supernatural beings can see it. They can see the power radiating off of her, they can see the slight glowing aura around her that is my blessing.”
I glanced at myself, wondering if I was now considered a supernatural being. It was true; my skin did look a lot healthier, giving off a thin unearthly glow. I did feel a lot different, stronger, more powerful, and invincible. Of course that was not true; if I failed this task I would surly die. But the others would live. Sam and Dean could go and live a normal life, Castiel could return with God to bring order in heaven. And Gabriel, my Gabriel, would be safe. And that’s what mattered right? For them all to be okay?
“Okay.” I said, gathering my courage. “Let’s go kill the devil.”