Time To Get A Gun
It was almost winter and I knew I couldn't keep my pregnancy a secret much longer. The only people I had confided in were Beth and Shane and that didn't help me any. I'm sure the others noticed the signs but none of them said a word. I still had to tell Rick though and I had decided that today was the day I told him. After all, he did have a right to know. He was by the RV talking to Carl.
"Carl, your father and I need to talk alone," I said.
"But dad was fixin' to teach me 'bout guns," he replied.
"Fine!", he growled back.
"What'd you wanna talk about?", Rick asked me.
I hesitated but finally said, "Me, you, Shane...and the baby."
"Baby?! What baby? Who...?", he said with a confused and heartbroken look on his face.
"My baby. I don't know which one of you is the father. It could be you but it's probably Shane...", he interrupted before I could finish.
"No, our baby," he said, "you're my wife, that baby is mine. Not his, mine!"
After a few moments of silence, he rubbed his face and softly asked, "Does he know?"
"Yeah, he knows."
"Well then, I'll be the one making sure he knows it's mine and if he comes anywhere near you..."
"Stop it, Rick. We both know things will never be the same. I think it'd be better if all three of us talked about this, together."
"I don't want him around, Lori. I need to know that whatever y'all had is over."
I can't believe she's pregnant and to think the baby could be Shane's creeped me out. I could see that he cared about her, maybe even loved her but there was something off about him. He was obviously jealous of Rick and there was something dark lingering in his eyes.
I'd been in the house for weeks now and I was under constant supervision since my incident. I needed something to occupy my mind so I asked daddy if I could learn how to shoot a gun. He didn't like the idea but he knew it was better for me to get out of the house and learn how to protect myself, so he agreed.
"Lori," I said, "can I talk to you a minute?"
"Yeah, of course. What's on your mind?"
"I know y'all are gonna target practice later and I was wonderin' if I could come along, I've already asked daddy and he agreed that I should learn how to use a gun."
"Well, you should be askin' Rick about this, not me. I'm sure he wont mind but I know he wouldn't want to upset your father. So go talk to him, okay?"
"Yes ma'am," I said.
When I found Rick he was showing Carl how to hold a gun and giving him some safety tips.
"Yeah," he said as he looked up at me.
"I've already talked to my daddy and he said it was okay for me to learn about guns and Lori said I should talk to you if I wanted to go to target practice. Can I come with y'all?"
"Sure, I was just showin' Carl some things. Have a seat and I'll go over them again," he said.
A little while later we were all ready for practice. Daryl, Rick and Shane had set up the targets and told us who our teachers were. Rick was helping Lori and Carl; Daryl was helping Maggie, Glenn and Carol; and me and Andrea got stuck with Shane.
I'd never been around so many guns.
Everyone else had some experience with guns but I didn't have any so Shane payed more attention to me which only made me more nervous.
I tried to focus on my target and not let anything distract me but I could feel him watching me.
"You're holdin' it wrong and your posture is horrible," he said, "you wanna stand your ground, not get knocked on your ass."
I looked around at the others, tryin' to get an idea of what I should do but it didn't help.
Before I knew it, Shane's arms were around me. "Hold the gun like this and spread your legs a little. Remember, you need to stand your ground. You can't be afraid of the gun. You think you got it now?"
I nodded as he slid his hands up my arms and placed them on my shoulders. I got tense as I felt his breath on my neck and he whispered in my ear, "Now line up your target and take a deep breath," I did as I was told, "now pull the trigger."
I'd been keepin' a close eye on Shane to be sure he left my family alone and didn't cause any trouble for the rest of us. After finding out about the baby, I just knew he would try something with Lori.
Lori was already a pretty good shot and Carl didn't need much instructin' so I watched the others to see how they were doin'. Maggie, Carol and Glenn could definitely hold their own, Andrea missed a few times but she certainly didn't need much help. Just as I looked over to see Shane with his arms around Beth, she pulled the trigger and hit her target.
"Beginners luck!", Daryl shouted to her with a smile and a wink. She just smiled at him shyly and looked away.
I heard Shane ask her if she wanted to try again and she nodded her head. She got in position with his help and then he moved his hands slowly down to her hips with no intentions of being subtle and whispered something to her. Whatever it was must've been the right thing 'cause she hit her target again. Shane immediately tried to hug her but she pulled away before he got too close.
"What the hell is wrong with him? Is he really losin' his mind?", I thought to myself, "She's a child! Poor girl couldn't be more than 16 or 17." and from the look on her face, it was clear she was uncomfortable in the position he was putting her in.
As I looked on, I kept thinking, "Was he tryin' to get Lori's attention? Was he tryin' to make her jealous and was it workin'? Did she really have feelings for him or was he just there for her amusement? Or was I the one that was there for their amusement?"