The Doctor Gets a Girl
The Doctor Gets a Girl
The Doctor sat on a stool in the middle of a television studio, a thin wall separating him from three women. He didn't know why he'd agreed to this. Damn Rory for signing him up to be on that matchmaking show. Damn him to hell. 'Well, no,' the Doctor thought, scowling. He wasn't that angry with Rory… he was just nervous, he supposed.
The theme song for the television show began to play and the Doctor tried his hardest to not let his scowl deepen.
"Today's bachelor is from a planet in a galaxy far away! He likes bowties and fish custard! He's insecure and has abandonment issues, the sweetheart, but he's known as the Oncoming Storm! Here he is-the Doctor!" the announcer said in an irritatingly high pitched voice, making the Doctor wince at both her description of him and the sheer tone of her voice. The Doctor was handed a microphone.
"Hi," he said nervously, not sure what to do.
"Okay, let's meet our possible bachelorettes! Bachelorette number one is a young firecracker from Ireland! She's known to her friends as a party girl and a player! Bachelorette number two is a sweet young southern belle flown in all the way from the American southeast. She spends her time reading, writing, and occasionally showing off her skills at martial arts in karate tournaments! And, finally, bachelorette number three is a feisty young ginger from England! She's recently divorced and lookin' for love!" the announcer squealed. "Okay, Doctor! To pick your perfect match, you ask these three beautiful ladies up to five questions in order to determine which you like best! Let the game begin!"
"Okay," the Doctor said and cleared his throat, "my first question is if you were being attacked by a strange alien creature, what is the first thing you'd do?"
"Bachelorette number one?"
"I'd scream and wait for you to come rescue me," said the first girl in a dull voice. The Doctor found her annoying.
"Bachelorette number two?"
"I'd either run or try to distract it until we found a way to either destroy or neutralize it," she said and the Doctor smiled slightly. This girl sounded slightly familiar, though he couldn't place where he'd heard her voice before.
"Bachelorette number three?"
"I'd shout at it until it stopped trying to attack me." This voice sounded extremely familiar also.
"Okay, question number two!" the announcer prompted and the Doctor thought for a moment.
"If you were given the choice between causing the death of a species to save the human race or letting a few humans die to resolve a conflict, which would you chose?"
"I'd save the humans," said the first girl.
"I'd let the humans die," said the second girl honestly.
"I'd save the humans," answered the third girl.
The Doctor frowned. He didn't like the two girls' willingness to destroy an entire species-it showed they were prejudice towards their own race, but at the same time, he thought the American's lack of willingness to save her race unnerving.
"If you could go to any one moment in time, where and when would it be and why?" the Doctor asked with a small smile.
"I'd go to the end of the universe just to see how our world was going to end," said the first girl and the Doctor winced, remembering when he'd gone to the end of the universe with Martha and had caused the Master to awaken.
"I'd go the Library in the twenty fifth century because I want to learn as much about the universe as I possibly can," the second girl answered and the Doctor winced again. He'd gone to the Library planet at around that time and his River had died there. But, at least she wanted to learn…
"I want to go to my wedding day to stop myself from marrying my last husband," said the third and the Doctor scowled. He didn't like when people messed with their own past.
"Okay, I have one last question… what is your opinion on bowties?"
"I think they're vaguely unattractive," said the first girl and the Doctor could hear the scowl in her voice. He scowled also.
"Bowties are cool," said the second girl and the Doctor's scowl turned into a grin faster then someone could say ', holy SHIT! It's DAVID TENNANT! OMG OMG OMG!' Not that he knew who David Tennant was… anyway…
"Bowties are for nerds and old people," said the third girl.
The Doctor had made his choice.
"Okay, I know whom I'd like to choose," he said confidently.
"Alrighty, sweetheart! Which of these three lovely ladies is your perfect match?" the announcer squealed and the Doctor resisted wincing at her exuberantly irritating voice. He thought it reminded him of nails on a chalkboard.
"I choose bachelorette number two."
"You've chosen bachelorette number two! Okay, sweetie, you can step into the next room to meet your perfect match!" the announcer said and the Doctor turned on his stool. The door in the wall separating the two rooms slowly opened and the Doctor's jaw dropped at whom he saw.
"You?" he gaped once he was positive the cameras had been turned off.
"Me," said Katrina Lycanthrope with a self-satisfied smirk. She was dressed in a t-shirt with the Tardis printed on it, blue skinny jeans, and black heeled boots, her eyes, which were jade green today, sparkling. The Doctor resisted face palming.
"It's…good to see you again?" he said in confusion and Katrina smiled.
"Likewise, love! So glad you chose me! It was between I, Donna Noble, or someone named Megan O'Goolagan. Believe me, you will not regret this!" she said and the Doctor scowled slightly. What had he done?
"Why were you on a dating show anyway?" he asked, standing up.
"Does it matter? I'd rather not discuss that at the moment," she said, fidgeting with a loose string on her t-shirt. The Doctor sighed and nodded. "Thanks. So, in the words of your last regeneration… allons-y!" she said, trotting off in the general direction of the exit. This was the worst thing anyone had ever convinced him to do. Despite how much he enjoyed the young writer, he decided he really did hate Rory after all.