Chapter 17: Promiscuous Girl
Before you see the light you must DIE! - Slayer, South of Heaven.
The Pacific Ocean was roaring with waves high and people fleeing as Ashley Massaro and Candice Michelle approached Chyna who was now surrounded by a 30ft Torrie Wilson and a 30ft Christy Hemme but Chyna wasn't phased by any of these giant Playboy Covergirls. As far as she was concerned she was still the best women's wrestler alive and no Babylonian harlot was going to get one over her no matter how demonic she was.
The WWE and TNA wrestlers watched from the roof top of the Camino Real along with all the other tourists for what had to be the biggest Diva match in Mexican history.
"Where's my Shelley Cam when I need it!" Alex Shelley complained.
"Here we go!" Konnan said as Torrie and Christy pushed Chyna into Ashley and Candice who threw her down into the Pacific Ocean creating a wave so big it splashed over all the hotels nearby drenching the wrestlers from top to bottom.
"I didn't think this was going to turn into a wet t shirt contest," LC complained hanging onto her mother's earring as she hit the water, "Get up mommy!" she cried into her mother's ear as Ashley grabbed Chyna's hair and face-planted her into the water again.
"Where's ATM she needs help!" Krystal Marshall said.
"No she can take them, she's not a two time WWF Women's Champion for nuthin, come on Chyna!" Jillian Hall cried and the SD Divas cheered Joanie on as Candice slapped her face as Ashley held her back.
"You're one of us Chyna!" Candice said with a demonic look in her eye.
"Join us and together we can destroy all mankind for looking at our Playboy pictures!" Christy Hemme said.
"It's because of men like Triple H that I can't get a decent date, all men ever say is "Take your top off!" Well we can put a stop to that tonight!" Torrie Wilson declared avidly.
"We'll teach men that the Whore of Babylon ain't no lady to mess with!" Ashley said.
"Hey that's my line!" Victoria said and MJ held her back and told her to be quiet.
"Where's ATM, Chyna's getting her butt kicked!" Mickie James said flinching as Candice kicked Chyna in the stomach and the 30ft Amazon keeled over in pain.
"I think Stephanie McMahon is about to get her wish, Chyna's about to take her last breath," JTG said as Torrie Wilson clothes-lined Chyna into the ocean causing yet another wave to soak the wrestlers through and through.
"ATM where are you?" Gail Kim cried anxious for someone to help Chyna as were all the other wrestlers because this was one match it looked like Chyna wasn't going to win.
"Not so fast ladies," roared the familiar voice of Lita and the wrestlers and tourists looked up and saw a 30ft red head looking in the Playboy Covergirls direction and she wasn't alone, Trish and Melina were with her and they were super-sized too.
"Get 'em!" Ashley Massaro said to Torrie, Candice and Christy while she pushed Chyna's head under the water trying to drown her. ATM wrestled with the three Divas, knocking them backwards and away from the innocent bystanders and the surrounding hotels and into the ocean while LC struggled for air under the water. Chyna saw her baby girl in trouble and fought the water coming into her lungs as Ashley pulled her under with all her body weight. Chyna reached one hand up and felt something metallic on the Diva's face, it was a piercing so she pulled it.
"ARGHHH!" Ashley screamed and held her face as blood spurted everywhere, Chyna came back up out of the water and made sure her daughter was okay.
"I'm fine mom," LC assured her coughing and Chyna got hot at seeing her daughter in pain, she tucked LC into her top, picked up Ashley and power bombed her into the ocean with such force the other 30ft Playboy Covergirls lost their balance and fell down too. Lita and Trish prayed over Chyna while Melina prayed over the water.
"We bind you in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Ghost, go back to Hell you whore!" the Anointed one cried and Ashley, Candice, Torrie and Christy screamed so loud everyone covered their ears. The water rose up and it looked for a second as if it was about to drown them all, instead it crashed down over the heads of the Playboy Covergirls and washed the Whore of Babylon away thanks to Melina's cleansing the water with her healing hands.
The Divas shrank back to their normal sizes and ATM helped them back to dry land, LC jumped out of her mother's halter top strap and into the water with a massive war cry alerting Carla B. Cool, Cameron, Chey, Sherilyn, Kaylee Marie and Aaliyah Mysterio to bring Hurricane Aurora outside. As soon as the children were all together they held hands with LC, closed their eyes and began to pray. As they did so Aurora shook her rattle, the Whore of Babylon rose, her spirit suspended in the air for everyone to see. The wrestlers and tourists gasped in amazement as the demonic spirit appeared like a ghost frozen in ice by Hurricane Aurora's supernatural powers screeching like a banshee and unwilling to go back to Hell; she shouldn't have complained, Hell would have been a better choice.
"AMEN!" all the children said at the end of the prayer and the Whore of Babylon smashed into a million pieces falling into the Pacific Ocean in bits of ice and melted away into nothing.
"Ding, dong, the bitch is dead!" LC sang and ATM along with the wrestlers and tourists cheered the young ones, Chyna couldn't wait to tell Hunter how his daughter's saved the world for demonic forces, meanwhile Charlotte and Dan just survived in the Predator 55 barely escaping the battle as they crashed onto dry land.
"Carla!" Charlotte cried running over to the little Canadian blond with her husband, Carla leapt into her arms and she spun her around ecstatically, "That was amazing truly Divine, I'm so proud of you sweetie!" she exclaimed joyfully.
"You are?" Carla asked giddy from the whole experience.
"We both are, you took out the Whore of Babylon virtually by yourself that was amazing!" Dan said and LC cleared her throat along with the other children.
"She had some help you know," LC said and Dan smirked.
"You're the daughter of the most powerful man in the wrestling industry let Carla have her moment in the sun," he said and Carla frowned.
"She's my sister we share all our moments together," she said.
"So you want to stay with Hunter and Joanie?" Charlotte asked nervously not wanting to be the bigger person and let Carla live with the family of her choosing but wanting to take her home and wrap a blanket around her as soon as possible.
"No I want to come back home with you and Dan," Carla said and the McCools smiled in elation.
"That's great because we miss you and we want you to be our daughter in the eyes of the law," Charlotte said and LC gasped.
"Deal!" Carla gasped, "I want to be a McCool!"
"You'll be Carla B. McCool, how cool is that?" Cameron said and ATM nodded.
"But what about Jericho?" LC asked, "Isn't he going to be pissed Char?"
"No he doesn't care about Carla and he never did, he just played father of the year to get Stephanie's attention," The Truth: Trish Stratus said, "Carla's in better hands with Charlotte and Dan, that's why God brought her to you in the first place and what God has ordained, let no man put asunder,"
Chyna wiped a tear away from her eye as Charlotte and Dan kissed Carla like she was the best thing that ever happened to them, and she was.
"Come on LC, let's go find your father and tell him what a jerk we think he is, but we love him anyway," she said walking back towards the hotel with LC and Aurora when Lita stopped her.
"That might not be a good idea right about now," she said and Chyna frowned.
"Why is he still pissed at Shawnie for not wanting to have sex with you?" Chyna asked and Trish hit her hand against her forehead and Melina sighed in anticipation of the drama that was about to ensue; like they needed anymore after the Attack of the 30ft Playboy Covergirls.
"No I was just gonna say that he was in the can," Lita replied in shock, "Shawn doesn't want to have sex with me?" Lita asked in disbelief and Chyna looked around for Undertaker hoping he'd find a grave to dig for her, "Why not is it because he thinks I'm a whore that I'm not good enough for him?" Lita asked insulted and Chyna shook her head that she'd got it all wrong.
"He's still hung up on Rebecca and he doesn't want to rush anything, you can understand that right? I mean it's not like you're the kind of person that goes from relationship to relationship without even blinking," Chyna said and El Con Dios, TKO, Shad and JTG chuckled.
"She had sex on live TV," Kurt Angle said.
"Well that's different she was doing her job, this is not about sex Lita it's about falling in love, you don't want Shawn to get the wrong impression by just throwing yourself at him do you?" Chyna said and Lita shifted her glance to the beads of sweat collecting between her toes not wanting to answer the question.
"I better go get ready for our date," she said moving away from the crowd of wrestlers and fans wanting her autograph and a picture too; she wasn't just Lita anymore, she was an American hero thanks to ATM finding the Weapons of Mass Destruction.
"But the hotel's wrecked there's water everywhere, you might as well go out in your bikini," Carlito said and Lita looked at him like he was Crazy Caribbean Cool.
"This is Mexico Li, no-one's gonna judge you, so you lost all your clothes in a showdown with the Whore of Babylon, who cares?" Chyna said and the children laughed.
"Plus you look really good in that bikini Lita," Melina said and Carlito, Randy and Nitro agreed, Shelton rubbed the back of his neck nervously.
"What's with you?" Shad asked him.
"Nothing she looks great," Shelton said and Krystal cocked her eye suspiciously at her boyfriend.
"Na-uh what's wrong with going on a date in a bikini?" she asked, "I mean we're Divas we're used to being almost naked in front of people, she's not exactly a virgin so why should she pretend to be shy when she's not?"
"It's not that," Shelton said and AJ Styles came over to his Kliq buddy and Shelton whispered in his ear what the problem with Lita's bikini was.
"Oh," AJ said and everyone leaned in wanting to know what Shelton told the Phenomenal one, "Sorry I am unable to divulge the information my Kliq buddy just gave me, I'm sworn to secrecy, its in the Kliq bylaws,"
"It's okay AJ I grant you permission to talk," Kevin Nash said and Shelton spoke.
"That was the bikini that Lita was wearing when Shawn was staring at her breasts during the SummerSlam promo shoot last year," he said and everyone shrugged.
"So?" MVP said.
"Yeah what's the big deal she looked hot in it then she looks hot in it now, what are you afraid Shawn's gonna think she's cheap because she's had the same bikini for over a year?" Krystal Marshall said and Jillian Hall patted Lita on the shoulder sympathetically.
"Don't worry sweetie, after you and Shawn get married you can have a decent wardrobe for once!" she said and Lita got hot.
"I can't do this I can't go on with this charade!" Lita cried and Trish tried to calm her down.
"Don't worry you'll be fine," she said.
"No Trish I won't be, when he sees me he'll remember me as I used to be not the angelic being I am now," Lita explained and Scott Hall rolled his eyes.
"Well someone sure thinks highly of themselves," he said and Kevin Nash slapped him upside the head and XPac laughed as the burrito he was eating went flying out of his hand.
"Lita he's in love with you, he doesn't care that you used to be erm, well . . . promiscuous," Melina said.
"Yeah I mean Shawn was no saint himself you know, the man humped a Canadian flag on PPV for crying out loud, if you ask me you're getting all wound up over nothing, you're the right woman for Shawn Lita, trust me I know what I'm talking about," XPac said.
"How do you know that I mean you don't even know me," Lita said.
"I know you like to have sex in front of people and in the Kliq that's a good thing because it may come to that," XPac said and everyone threw stuff at him and Lita stormed off in a huff.
"Lita don't listen to him he's just a degenerate," Chyna said pulling the angry red-head back.
"But I'm not, I'm a woman of God and I can't fulfill the fantasy Shawn has of me, I want him to love me for who I am not who I used to be and this bikini is bringing up a lot of bad memories," Lita said.
"Like what?" Chyna asked concerned.
"Like the fact that it was when I was wearing this that Shawn actually looked my way, now I know all he was interested in was my body, if I wanted a man that was in love with the character Vince McMahon made me, I would marry Edge," Lita said and ran away from Chyna towards the hotel not knowing where she was going only that she needed some time to think. Maybe she should have looked up then she wouldn't have bumped into her ex-fiancé who had spent nearly an hour playing Rock, Paper, Scissors rematch with Hunter beating him each time and having to start again until he finally went to the bathroom to take a leak and Edge was able to make his escape.
"What's wrong Lita?" Edge asked her noticing the distressed look on her face, he hadn't seen that look in awhile especially since she got her Anointing, "Are you worried about your first date with Shawn?"
Lita nodded, "He's never gonna let the old me go if he sees me in this bikini, the new me would never wear something so revealing," she said and Edge frowned.
"So why are you wearing it then?" he said simply and Lita went blank.
"I don't know, I guess I didn't think about it until I remembered that I was seeing Shawn tonight for the first time as his girlfriend," she said.
"Is there anything else you can wear?" Edge asked her and Lita shook her head, everything she had was wet, "Shawn's with Rey Mysterio, they've been having a go at Dominic for having sex with Shaul,"
"Dominic had sex with Shaul?" Lita said in disbelief, "She's only 12 years-old!"
"That's why he's getting his ear chewed off, he used a condom though," Edge said.
"That's not the point they shouldn't be having sex at all," Lita replied and shook her head in distress, "Whatever happened to just holding hands for an extended period of time?" Lita mused.
"It gets boring," Edge answered and Lita shook her head, "All relationships no matter the depth or length lead to sex eventually, it's what we were made to do,"
"We are created in God's image and He created us to love each other not do whatever stupid thing comes into our heads," Lita argued and Edge's face dropped.
"So our relationship was stupid is that it? I'm not good enough for you because I'm not a good Christian soldier like HBK is that what you're saying?" he asked offended.
"Come on Edge face it, you only wanted me because of my body, you never loved me for who I really am," Lita said and Edge pulled his hair behind his ears and paced up and down the side of the hotel frustrated, "You never really cared about me,"
"I LOVE YOU!" Edge cried, "I wanted to marry you, Saturday was supposed to be the biggest day of my life and you just ripped out the last part of my heart that was beating thanks to this calling on your life and that no good sonofabitch HBK!"
"Edge calm down we're still friends aren't we?" Lita said hopefully, "You know like me and Matt,"
Edge shook his head, "Would a friend do this?" he asked Lita and pulled the unsuspecting saint into a kiss and just like that she became a sinner refusing to see by faith what God had given her, instead she settled for a make out session behind the Camino Real much to Hunter's enjoyment. If anyone wanted to break the news to Shawn Michaels that Lita couldn't be trusted with any man, it was the man who had been against their whole infatuation in the first place. Hunter was about to go find Shawn when he heard a familiar voice followed by a scuffle and turned to see Matt Hardy throwing Edge against the hotel wall.
"He's gonna ruin everything!" Hunter cursed and broke up the fight Edge and Matt were now having, "Will you two stop fighting over Lita she's clearly not worth it,"
Lita went red and not from embarrassment, "I was going to pull away," she said defiantly and Hunter rolled his eyes.
"Don't tell me, it was the bikini right?" Edge said derisively to Lita and Matt Hardy pushed him back onto Hunter.
"You forced her to kiss you, just like you forced her to end her relationship with me!" Matt roared angrily and Lita got hotter and hotter, the temperature soaring at an incredible rate as the three men who had made her life a living Hell over the last years of her career argued back and forth over her once again. She was at the breaking point, if Edge, Matt and Hunter didn't shut up she was going to destroy one of them in what was left of Tijuana with her Righteous Indignation.
"Hunter what's going on where's Shawn?" Chyna said coming over to them with LC and Aurora.
"He's warning Dominic about how dangerous sex can be, something you know all about right Lita?" Hunter said and that was all the Anointed one needed to hear.
"Daddy?" LC said as Hunter fell to the floor and didn't move, she clutched his hand but it fell limp and he wasn't breathing, "Daddy get up!" LC said shaking Hunter over and over again but the Cerebral Assassin didn't get up.
"Lita he's not moving, what did you do to him?" Chyna asked joining her dearest love and daughter on the ground.
"I killed him, he's dead," Lita replied simply and Chyna stared at her in shock.
"Why did you do that all he did was make some stupid jokes about you!" she asked furiously.
"I am under Divine mandate Joanie and anyone who hurts me dies, its as simple as that," Lita said and LC stamped on Lita's foot causing the red-head to hop up and down holding her sore toe.
"I'll die for that right, so now I can be with my Daddy in Heaven," the warrior princess said hopefully.
"Virgins are exempt, and he's not in Heaven, he lost his seat at the Right Hand of the Father when he disrespected me, he's in Hell now, just like Trish said he would be and now I know why," Lita said and LC broke down in tears over her father's dead body and Lita walked away leaving Matt and Edge in shock, if they had said one more thing it could have very easily been them laying on the sand with two broken hearted women crying over them but Lita showed them mercy, at least for now.