Chapter 2: Aurora's Ark
Lunchtime, LC's house, Weston, Kern County, Bakersfield, CA:
Inside everyone was wearing their winter coats shivering and trying to warm themselves up but it was pointless, Aurora was extremely pissed off. Charlotte and Dan had been trying to warm her up by sitting with her next to the fireplace but she extinguished the flames and she got so cold they couldn't hold her anymore, the only person that could hold her was LC and the lil warrior princess had been holding her for hours with no change. Carla tried to entertain her with dolls and teddy bears but she turned those to ice and kept crying and had been all morning, now it was lunchtime and everyone was out of ideas.
"Why won't she stop crying?" LC's foster mother asked rubbing her hands together while her husband tried to seal in all the heat by taping up the doors and windows.
"I don't know," Charlotte answered, "I tried to call Stephanie but she keeps hanging up on me,"
"Well I can understand that, she's got every right to be angry," Dan said and LC glared at him, "Hunter chose Joanie over her, she heartbroken!"
"She shouldn't have fired Joanie in the first place," Charlotte countered.
"She was in love with him too, imagine if I was in love with Trish Stratus this whole time and never told you," Dan argued and Charlotte folded her gloved hands angrily.
"Are you in love with Trish Stratus?" Charlotte asked him and he squared his jaw and folded his arms too.
"Are you in love with Shawn Michaels?" he asked her and Charlotte blushed causing everyone to laugh at her, "I rest my case,"
"He's cute but I think he's got enough woman problems Char," LC said pacing back and forth with Aurora crying in her arms, "If you wanna piece of HBK you better get to the back of the line cause there are a trailer load of hos waiting to take Rebecca's place,"
"Any idea who he's interested in?" Charlotte asked her and LC and gave her foster sister a look like she was the dumbest person on Earth, "Why are you looking at me like that?"
"Because you're the dumbest person on Earth," LC replied and Carla sighed irritably, "I changed my mind, Carla is the dumbest person on Earth will you quit it?"
Carla put her hands up in protest, "I can't help it I miss him okay?" she said in self-defense.
"Call him then oh wait you have already, 20 freaking times! By the time Joanie and Hunter come and pick us up he's not gonna wanna talk to you ever again!"
"How long is Cameron gonna be staying at his grandma's anyway?" Charlotte mom asked LC and Charlotte shook her head displeased.
"For as long as she can keep him there, Karen doesn't think Shawn is a very good father," Charlotte replied.
"Why would she think that?" her mom asked again.
"Because she's a bitch," LC replied and Charlotte told her off, "What she is, she's trying to split Shawn's family up and make him cry,"
"Well he is still mourning, maybe its best he not have the children back until he's over his wife's passing," Charlotte's dad added coming over to the in the middle of the room.
"How is being separated from his children gonna make him get over Rebecca?" Charlotte asked.
"I don't know but with the drugs and the bizarre hair-changing thing, maybe he's not ready to be a single parent," he explained.
"He won't be a single parent, trust me on that," LC said growing weary as Aurora continued to cry, suddenly a tree fell outside the house with a loud crashing, everybody ran to the window and saw a tree floating down the road along with several cars and other random objects in a flood caused by Aurora no doubt, "Gees Ro-Ro time out!" LC said to her little sister.
"Where did all that water come from?" LC's foster mother asked in shock.
"Where do you think?" LC replied, "Come on Carla," she called to her other sister running up the stairs to her foster sister's room.
"LC where are you going?" Charlotte called after her.
"To raid your CD collection!" LC yelled back and Charlotte scratched her head wondering why then the sound of CDs crashing to the floor startled everyone, suddenly the sound of Mariah Carey's 'Music Box' filled the house.
"Isn't this the song Stephanie's always playing to Aurora when she wants her to sleep?" Dan asked his wife and she nodded and ran up to her bedroom expecting to see Aurora asleep in LC's arms but she wasn't sleeping, in fact, she was crying even harder and LC took a deep sigh her breath showing how cold the air really was.
"Well that didn't work," she said and Carla stopped the CD, "I'm afraid there's only one way out of this guys,"
Carla and Charlotte looked at each other wondering what LC had in mind, then they figured out it had something to do with raincoats, Wellington boots and flood pants, "LC we are not going out in that!" Charlotte protested pointing to the flood outside the window as her foster sister threw Carla a raincoat, "LC listen to me we are not going out there!"
"It'll be just like Noah's ark," LC replied putting a rain hat on Aurora's head covering the baby's head completely, it didn't stop her from crying though, "Only without the animals,"
Charlotte pulled her hair out as LC and Carla lead the way back downstairs to explain LC's idea to everyone, "Don't listen mom she's crazy," Charlotte protested.
"No she's Helmsley," Carla corrected her adoptive mother and Charlotte shrugged thinking what's the difference?
"Lisa honey why are you dressed in your raincoat and boots?" LC's foster mother asked curiously.
"Is the Sunseeker still back there?" LC asked her foster father who nodded.
"Of course it is why?" he asked curiously and Dan lowered his head knowing exactly what LC intended to do.
"Of all the ridiculous ideas you've come up with LC this is by far the dumbest," he said wearily.
"We've got no choice pretty boy Ro-Ro's going out of her supernatural mind and the only way we're going to survive this flood is to get in that boat and find Stephanie McMahon," LC explained.
"What!" Charlotte's parents exclaimed, "You want to go outside in that?" Charlotte's dad said in disbelief pointing at the rain that continued to pour unabated.
"We better move fast," Carla said looking down at the carpet and seeing water seeping through, eventually everyone noticed it too and started to panic, "We take the boat to LA, that's where Stephanie, Rocky and Jericho are hanging out today,"
"Don't you mean that's where Daddy's hanging out?" LC teased and her sister nudged her on the shoulder and told her to shut up, the rain exploded through the window and everyone ducked, "Okay people let's move out!" LC demanded and eventually everyone exited through the back of the house and waded through the water to the garage where Charlotte's dad had a boat tied up. Together he and Dan jumped behind the wheel and helped everyone get in, the water was at 6 feet and rising rapidly submerging the whole neighborhood. People started screaming seeing Charlotte's parents in their boat they quickly followed suit and jumped into their boats picking up people who didn't have boats and rode over the rising water.
"You call that a boat?" Charlotte's dad yelled out to a neighbor in a Portofino 35 and his wife admonished him.
"That's not very Christian dear," she said and her husband apologized then revved the engine and checked to make sure everyone was safely inside.
"Last one to LA's a male cheerleader!" he yelled and tore past his neighbors who looked on thinking of upgrading to the Portofino 53.
"LC take Aurora into the main cabin she might catch a cold," Charlotte's mom said and LC, Charlotte and Carla looked at her like she was the dumbest person on the planet until she remembered that it was Aurora that was causing the flood in the first place, "Right she's upset this is gonna take some getting used to," Charlotte's mom said scratching her head.
"Tell me about it," LC said wondering how life was gonna be if Aurora stayed mad at her mom forever, she didn't wanna end up like those idiots in Day After Tomorrow, there had to be a way to make Aurora happy again and she had a feeling Chris Jericho had something to do with it.
"Hello?" she said answering her cell phone.
"Hey LC its mom," Chyna said, "How's Aurora doing?"
"Not good, she cried all morning then she started a flood and my whole neighborhood is submerged in water,"
"Oh my God!" Chyna said startling Hunter who took the phone.
"LC what's going on?" he asked concerned.
"Relax Pops Carla and I have got everything under control, your crazy ass daughter caused a flood so were taking my foster father's cruiser to LA to find that dumbass wife of yours and talk some sense into her," LC answered.
"Lisa Stephanie's still here, she hasn't left yet," Hunter explained sitting in the top of an oak tree with Joanie, Shawn, Lita, Trish and Carlito looking down at the Hummer limousine and ATM Machine that were submerged below.
"Why not couldn't she find a broom big enough to fly over on?" LC remarked causing Chyna to chuckle as she listened in on the conversation.
"No see Shawn and I kind of stole Vince's Hummer limousine that was taking her to the airport, she's still in Connecticut," he said and LC burst out laughing, then Aurora started laughing and everyone heard her and looked over at them, "Was that Aurora laughing?" Hunter asked joyfully.
"It sure was, I think it was because of your DX antics," LC said.
"No it was because you laughed Lisa, not because we pulled another prank on Vince, I think she's feeding off of your energy," Hunter realized, "So if I make you laugh she laughs,"
"Okay then make with the jokes!" LC said urgently.
"Do you know what HBK stands for?" Hunter asked her.
"Nah-uh what does HBK stand for?" LC asked.
"Hairy Butt Kid," Hunter replied and Shawn got angry as the sound of LC laughing radiated through the air.
"That's a good one, tell another joke she's laughing Daddy she's laughing!" LC said and the rain stopped.
"Okay what do you get when you cross a Texan with Vince McMahon's ass?" he said and Lita tried to calm Shawn down as he tried to grab the phone out of Hunter's hand.
"I don't know what do you get when you cross a Texan with Vince McMahon's ass?" LC asked giggling along with Carla who was listening in too.
"Sweet Chin Asscial," Hunter replied and LC laughed so hard she dropped her cell phone in the water.
"You hear that Aurora's laughing, we should be able to get out of here now," Hunter said enjoying the sound of his baby girl's laughter, "LC? Don't leave we're on our way," he said down the phone but LC didn't hear him, her phone was history and she was too busy holding her sides too notice.
"Sweet Chin Asscial, oh that's good, isn't Daddy funny Ro-Ro?" she asked her baby sister who slapped her hands together joyfully her cheeks warming up along with the rest of her body, "Let's get this thing off your head," LC said taking the rain hat off Aurora's head causing the little one to cry and the rain to start falling again, "Okay-okay you can wear it," LC said leaving the hat on her and the rain stopped again, "You're a spoiled brat you know that?" she told her and stuck her tongue out at her which Aurora responded by sticking her finger in her nose, "Hey pick your own!" LC snapped shielding her face from Aurora's curious hands.
"Well she's doing much better now, maybe this water will start going down and we can go back home," Charlotte's mom said looking down at the water that was now at 20ft but LC shook her head.
"We're still going to LA, I don't think we should wait for DX to get here," she said.
"Why isn't the water going down?" Charlotte said looking at all the boats that had set sail over the last ten minutes.
"Because we're in a boat what else are we gonna sail on, asphalt?" LC said sarcastically and Charlotte frowned in confusion.
"You mean Aurora wants to sail to L.A?" she asked and LC nodded.
"This child is so spoiled I can't believe we have to sail to LA because she wants to," Dan complained, "Do you know how much flood damage she's going to cause?"
"Not as much damage as I am to your ass after I kick it!" LC threatened and Dan went quiet not wanting to be put in a Rear Naked Choke again, "Just ride Dan, the sooner we get to LA the better,"
"You want to talk to Chris Jericho about us?" Carla asked her sister.
"Look CarlaBcool, the only way he could be your father is if his sperm tag teamed with Hunter's sperm and they both penetrated mom's ovaries at the same time," LC explained and now it was time for Charlotte to laugh thinking how naïve her foster sister was.
"That is so sci-fi," Carla said doubting LC's theory also, "but it would explain an awful lot, I mean, I really do look like him don't I?" she asked her sister playing with her curly blond hair her blue eyes clear as glass. LC peered into them, shook her head and pulled on Dan's sweater.
"We need to make a stop downtown and get Carla some hazel colored contacts," she said and Carla stuck her tongue out at her which Aurora copied, but Carla couldn't work out how she saw her because her eyes were covered up by the rain hat LC put back on her head. She held Aurora's little hand and squeezed it lovingly, suddenly her hair flared up conducting electric pulses from Aurora and struck a nearby tree with a bolt of lightning, it crashed onto the water causing a huge ripple in the water that rocked their boat and everyone else's. Charlotte, Dan and her parents looked at Carla in shock.
"What did you just do Carla?" Charlotte asked in shock, "Did you cause that tree to fall down?"
Carla looked at her hands, they were ashy, "Yeah I did," she said trembling and LC put her hand on her sister's shoulder calmly.
"Carla, be cool," she said and Carla nodded, "Let a-rip Danny Boy!"
"Aye, aye Captain!" Dan replied and sailed past all the other boats towards Santa Monica including the Stinger's jet powered speedboat.
"Where are those gringos going in such a hurry?" Konnan said tying his bandana back around his head while Homicide and Hernandez tried to figure out who that was.
"Joe will you sit down? You're fat ass is rocking the boat everytime you get up!" Homicide complained and Samoa Joe just ignored him.
"You know who that was Stinger?" he said to the Icon of TNA who was heading back to Orlando via. LAX.
"No but I got a feeling they're going to So Cal too," Sting replied and revved his engine loudly turning the boat around.
"Hey what you doing man?" Hernandez complained almost completely out of the boat.
"We're going back to LA," he said tailing the Portofino 53.
"But we already put John Cena in the hospital, now the WWE doesn't have a Champion and TNA can finally dominate the wrestling world," Konnan reasoned getting up with LAX's help and standing in the cock pit with Sting, "What we following those gringos for when we could be in Orlando celebrating vato?"
"I'm a gringo Konnan and as the captain of this ship I'm telling you to sit your crippled ass down now!" Sting warned the leader of LAX who snarled at the former NWA Champion as Homicide and Hernandez helped him back down.
"We don't have to follow this gringo when we get to LA, why don't we see if we can find Melina and ask her to heal your hip and kidneys man?" Hernandez suggested, "She lives in Santa Monica,"
"You think she would?" Konnan asked hopefully.
"She has to she's part of that angelic trio that ended the war in Iraq, I'm sure she'd have no problem helping out a fellow Chicano," Hernandez argued and Konnan was convinced.
"Okay we stop by the little mamacita's, I hope she cooked, Joe quit rocking the boat or I'm a go 5150 on your ass!" Konnan threatened the Samoan Submission Machine who rolled his eyes and continued eating his breakfast burrito like he didn't have a care in the world.
"Sweet phone," he said reaching over into the water and picking up an army colored cell phone.
"That can't work it's been in the water too long," Homicide said looking over at it from the other side of the Stinger.
"We'll see about that," Joe said dialing the last dialed number, he couldn't believe who answered.
"Triple H, I believe you owe me a match," Joe said as Hunter answered.
"Put my daughter on the phone!" Hunter snapped angrily still in the oak tree.
"Isn't Aurora a little to young to be handling electronic gadgets?" Joe replied.
"You're never too young to learn a new skill, I think you might wanna take a chance and learn how to use a toothbrush for the first time in your life, I can smell the salsa from here Holmes," Hunter said and Shawn laughed.
"Is that your boyfriend Hunter? When are you two finally gonna tie the knot, can I come to the commitment ceremony?" Joe teased.
"I don't think we can cater to you Joe, I mean there's gonna be other people there who need to eat you know, not to mention your mama who told me to say hi by the way, she's totally worth the ten bucks I paid her thanks for the recommendation man,"
Joe broke the phone and threw it back in the water angrily, "Hello?" Hunter called, "I don't think he's gonna come to our commitment ceremony Shawn,"
"I am not talking to you!" Shawn snapped as Lita combed his hair, "You can commit yourself to a mental institution!"
"What did I say?" Hunter argued innocently.
"You told LC I had a hairy ass," Shawn complained as Lita combed through his knotted hair, "Why don't you scalp me and get it over with?" he said to her irritated.
"I'm sorry but I ain't about to go to NC with you looking like a mental patient now hold still Hairy Butt Kid," Lita replied and everyone laughed.
"I better look good when you're done cause I wanna kick both your asses in style!" Shawn said angrily as Lita raked the brush through a knot that went from Shawn's roots to the tips, "Easy!" he complained.
"But you do have a hairy ass Shawn, I saw you shaving it at my house that one time," Hunter argued.
"That was Vince you moron!" Shawn snapped.
"Oh yeah, I get his ass and your face mixed up because they're always in close proximity to each other," Hunter quipped and Shawn Super-kicked him out of the tree onto the Hummer limousine below with a loud thud.
"HUNTER!" Vince barked riding over to them in his brand new Predator 108 motor yacht with Stephanie, Linda and Shane, "What has your demon seed done to my compound, its under 20ft of water?"
Hunter looked up at Vince's latest toy and looked up at Shawn who was already climbing down towards him.
"Sorry Vince I can't control her powers, its all God you know? I can't tell Him what to do," Hunter said biding time for Shawn to make his way down.
"The Hell you can't, you're hanging out with a saint, a seraphim and an angelic trio for Pete's sake, you can call off the turbulence if you want to but you don't do ya? No you just want to destroy my family like you destroyed my Hummer limousine, is that my brand new Hummer limousine you're standing on?" Vince asked looking at the vehicle Hunter had fallen on.
"Yeah it's a piece of crap, just like you," Hunter replied as Shawn jumped down next to him.
"Ready . . . aim . . . fire!" Shawn yelled at Lita, Trish and Carlito who pelted the McMahons will green balloons that exploded on impact.
"What is that smell?" Shane asked scrunching up his nose, "It smells like . . . urine! Oh my God Dad they're throwing urine at us!"
"Quick everybody into the water!" Vince commanded and the McMahons jumped overboard into a rescue boat Stephanie and Linda had lowered down seeing the balloons coming their way ages before Vince and Shane did. As the McMahons headed back to the compound, DX, Lita, Trish and Carlito got into the Predator 108 and rode off towards North Carolina where three boys, two Hardy and one Nature were expecting their arrival.
"That's my motor yacht, dammit DX you won't get away with this you hear me Triple H? You stupid sonofabtich!" Vince yelled shaking his fist at the departing vehicle, then water rose right over the McMahon Helmsley Compound submerging it completely, "My estate, it's destroyed!" Vince cried looked down at it from the rescue boat, "Call our pilot, we're going to LA together but we're going by air! We have to put a stop to child once and for all!"
"And how exactly are we gonna do that, I think it's a little too late for an abortion," Stephanie said furious that Chyna and Hunter had taken off with her father's new motor yacht.
"That girl is half McMahon still, she shares the same blood as the three of us, I say we show her just how much she's missing out on now that's she on her own with those degenerates," Vince said and Linda and Stephanie nodded knowing what Vince meant.
"The chopper's on its way," Shane said pocketing his cell phone.
"Good as soon as we get to LA we stop by Rodeo Drive and buy the whole damn toy store, then we get Aurora from Charlotte's house and give her a little going away present, as soon as she sees those toys she'll never hurt any of us ever again!" Vince said and the rest of the McMahon family nodded liking that idea very much.
"After all tricks are for kids right?" Linda said.
"Right," her family agreed.
Yeah right God said to Carlito who laughed.
"What's so funny?" Lita asked him as she finally finished combing HBK's her hair.
"God has such a great sense of humor," Carlito replied and told everyone Vince's plan to stop Hurricane Aurora and they laughed along with Him.
"Hey Lita isn't that your mom and dad standing on the top of the ATM Machine?" Shawn said running his fingers through his copper gold hair not noticing the way Lita was staring at him until he turned around and saw her, "Lita, did you hear what I said?" he asked frowning at her puzzled at the look on her face which Trish quickly remedied by slapping her upside the head.
"He's only hanging out with you so he can get to Edge," Hunter quipped humorously and Lita came back to reality when she saw her parents waving furiously at her in the water, "I'll swing this bad boy around and pick 'em up," Hunter said and Lita sighed as Shawn and Carlito helped her parents into the Predator 108. She hugged her mom and scowled at her father, her friends picked up on the tension between them immediately, especially after Mr. Dumas decided that he wanted to ride the boat.
"Ya'll can go to North Cackey Lackey via Georgia, I used to own one of these, its the Predator 55," he said fiddling with all the knobs like he knew what he was doing.
"Actually its the Predator 108," Trish said.
"Like there's a difference," Mr. Dumas said and took everyone down South on a very bumpy, awkward and uncomforable ride especially for the red-head with the notoriously bad temper.