Host Survivor 2014
"Hello Summoners! Welcome back to LoL Survivor! My name is Ezreal!"
"My name is Lux, and we're your hosts!"
"NOT FOR LONG!" All of a sudden Ryze and Fiora jumped into the frame.
"WE VANT TO 'OST ONCE MORE!"
"I hate to break it to you, guys, but you were fired." Lux replied.
Ezreal nodded, "Yeah you can't exactly demand that you get your job back. Doesn't work that way."
"We know, that's why we're having a host off!" Ryze screamed.
"YEAH! A 'OST OFF!"
Ryze explained, "We convinced the show director to give us a shot and he did. He said that if we win, we get our jobs back soooooo…."
Ezreal asked, "What?! That's ridiculous! And what the fuck is a host off?"
"Vell, we do challenge to show which one of us iz zeh better one."
Lux was confused, "Then, who'll host today's episode?"
Ryze paused and looked at Fiora, "I don't know… Who'll host today's episode?"
Fiora thought then yelled, "ZEH CONTESTANTS!"
Ezreal added, "Then who will be eliminated?"
Ryze quickly replied, "We get to decide who hosted better out of the contestants and whoever was the worst gets eliminated."
Lux pointed out, "But that's unfair for Sona. She can't speak."
Ryze sighed, "We'll figure out how when we get there ok? WE'RE GOING TO DO THIS!"
The screen turns black and all the contestants are standing in front of the camera.
"Hello," Ahri said in a really weird voice, "welcome to ah…aaaahh…ACHOO!"
"Ah ah achoo? That's not the name of the show, silly." Jinx giggled.
Ahri sighed, "I woke up with a cold ok? And I feel like death…"
Kat spoke, "Anyways, welcome to Host Survivor! A one episode show that will allow us to see which host is truly the better host."
"We're your hosts, Talon, Ahri, Kat, Sona, and Jinx," Talon exclaimed, "And here are our hosts- I mean- Contestants!"
Ryze, Fiora, Lux, and Ezreal walked in front of the camera.
Jinx explained the challenge, "Anyways, today's challenge is BOOM POW DEATH FIRE BURNING ANNIHILATION! Good luck."
Kat sighed, "Ignore her. No offence Jinx."
Jinx smiled, "None taken."
Kat continued, "Anyways, today, we've gathered a group of volunteers to be your audience. Your goal is to entertain them. At the end of your performance, they will vote on the ones they find the most entertaining. Simple right?"
They all nodded.
"Good. Then let's get to ACHOOO!" Ahri sneezed so hard that she actually fell over, "it… I hate my life… Sniff."
Lux and Ezreal
"Alright, Ez-y-poo. Let's win this."
Ezreal nodded, "We've got this. We're young and hip. We know all the references. They're old and clueless."
Lux smiled, "Don't get too confident. Don't underestimate them either."
Ezreal hugged her, "I can't. We're just so good!"
Lux chuckled, "Anyways, let's go."
Lux and Ezreal and the audience cheered, "YEAH! WOOH!"
Lux waved, "Hey!"
Ezreal started to panic, "H-h-hey… We're … uh… Fucks and Lez. I mean Ducks and and Fez. I mean Shucks and Isreal."
"Omg, Ezreal what's going on? You're ruining everything. Ugh. I need to come up with something fast."
Lux quickly shut him up, "He means Lux and Ez. Clearly, Ezreal needs to go to school again considering he can't remember his own name."
The audience laughed.
Ezreal frowned, "L-L-Lux"
Lux mocked, "S-s-s-sorry. I c-c-can't understand you. It's ironic. A host can't talk properly in front of an audience."
The audience laughed again.
Lux whispered to Ezreal, "Come on. Pull yourself together."
Ezreal exhaled and said, "I may not be able to talk but I can sing! ALL THE SINGLE LADIES! ALL THE SINGLE LADIES! ALL THE SINGLE LADIES! ALL THE SINGLE LADIES! ALL THE SINGLE LADIES! PUT YOUR HANDS UP!"
Members of the audience giggled.
"Are you trying to tell us something, Ezreal?"
Ezreal nodded, "Yes, I'm trying to replace you."
Lux put her hand on her hips, "Excuse me? How-"
"GET AWAY DEMACIAAA FROM HER DEMACIAAA YOU MAN WHORE!" Garen then jumped onto the stage and tackled Ezreal.
Lux screamed, "Garen! What are you doing?"
Garen started punching Ezreal, "HOW DARE YOU DEMACIAAA SAY THAT YOU WANT TO DEMACIAAA REPLACE MY SISTER!"
Ezreal squealed, "I'M SORRY I'M SORRY!"
Lux started pulling on Garen, "GAREN! IT WAS JUST A JOKE!"
"YOU GET AWAY FROM MY BELOVED YOU MAN WHORE! DON'T WORRY EZ, MY LOVE! I'LL SAVE YOU!" Taric then jumped on stage.
Ezreal was surprised, "WHAT THE- TARIC? WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE?!"
Taric began to punch Garen.
Garen laughed, "YOUR PUNCHES TICKLE!"
Taric demanded, "I DEMAND YOU TO GET OFF OF MY LOVE!"
Taric then stunned Garen with his dazzling looks. Taric then shoved Garen off of Ezreal and Garen was unable to do anything about it.
Taric laughed, "They can't say no when they are stunned."
Lux looked at Taric, "That's wrong in so many ways… Do yourself a favour and never say that again."
Taric turned to her, "HOW DARE YOU SAY THAT, YOU MAN STEALING SLUT!"
Lux pointed out, "Umm… I never stole Ezreal from you. Last time I checked, I began dating two weeks after you two broke up sooooo…"
Taric raised his finger to argue but realized that she was right, "Pfft, whatever. I still hate you."
Lux replied, "The feeling is mutual. Now if you don't mind, we have an audience to get back to so can you –"
"What audience?" Taric asked.
"That audi…" Lux turned around and saw that the audience was gone. "Where'd they go?"
Kat walked in, "Yeah you guys kind of scared them off."
Talon announced, "Yeah you guys kind of lose now. Sorry."
Ahri sneezed, "Well I ACHOOO guess Ryze and sniff Fiora get their jobs ba-a-A-AAAA-AAAACHOOO!... back..."
Ryze and Fiora cheered, "YEAH AND WE DIDN'T EVEN NEED TO DO ANYTHING!"
Ezreal and Lux looked at each other, "DAMN IT GAREN AND TARIC! YOU TWO RUINED EVERYTHING!"
"NO, MY BELOVED EZREAL. FORGIVE ME!"
"I'M SORRY DEMACIAAA, SISTER! WILL YOU EVER DEMACIAAA FORGIVE ME!?"
Lux and Ez sighed, "Fine."
Ryze asked Fiora, "Well… now that we got our jobs back, how will we eliminate a contestant?"
Fiora thought then answered, "Let's just pick zeir names from a 'at."
Ryze nodded, "Good idea!"
All the contestants shook their heads, "No! No! BAD IDEA!"
Fiora picked a name out of a hat, "Talon! Aurevoir! You 'ave been eliminated!"
Talon screamed, "WHAT! BUT THAT'S SO UNFAIR!"
Ryze replied, "Stop complaining and leave. We don't want you to ruin are mood. This is a good day for me and Fiora."
Talon sighed, "Oh well…" He turned to his childhood friend, "You better win Kat. We'll hang out, maybe assassinate a few people, after this show is over."
Kat kissed him, "There's no one else that I'd rather bathe in the blood of my victims with but you."
Everyone but Jinx looked disgusted.
Everyone's Confessional but Jinx
"That's what they think is romantic? They need help…"
"Aww! I want to kill people too..."
(Well, I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Sorry if it's a little short. Anyways, when I was tallying the votes, I got annoyed because there was a 3-way tie between Ahri, Sona, and Talon. In an attempt to prevent this from happening again, I would like you all to put down one person you want eliminated and one person you want to stay. Ok? Simple enough. Have a nice day and don't forget to vote.)