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A Hanyo's 'Jar Of Hearts'

By Megan Biemesderfer


A Hanyo's 'Jar Of Hearts'

Kagome POV

I should have known. I'm done, I can't take this anymore!

I stare at the two in front of me, Inuyasha staring back and Kikyo looking a bit ashamed. A while back we managed to have a talk and because of our shared soul I was able to let her feel what I do when I see them together. After that we called a sort of truce and are actually on good terms with each other, she even said she's glad I'm her reincarnation and trained me a bit! I told her that even with how I feel about him she shouldn't give up so long as she walked the Earth, we agreed he should be the one to choose which incarnation and stop fighting over what we can't control. Now though, now I am done. I know Kikyo can tell too, I flash her a smile and she nods back before I turn on my heel and start to walk I go I think about what I had just seen.


"Hey has anyone seen InuYasha?" I look at my tired pack, we just finished a battle. I lost track of InuYasha during the long drawn out fight and am now worried. Everyone shakes their heads no, I can feel a frown marring my face. "Right, Sango and Shippo please start setting up camp in that clearing we passed about ten minutes before the battle. Miroku can you get some firewood and check the area please?"

Shippo and Miroku nod while Sango takes a long look at me, "Kagome, where are you going to be during this?"

I look at my sister figure and grin, "Why to find Inu of course! I'm worried but my intuition is telling me I can find him pretty quick."

She nods and turns to catch up to the boys who had already started walking, looking over her shoulder to toss a quick be careful at me. InuYasha is the only one who hasn't realized I can take care of myself. I start moving in the direction my instincts and reiki are guiding me in, stopping behind some trees. Inu and Kikyo are standing there, he's holding her close and leaning in to kiss her. Before he can she pulls back a bit, neither are aware of me yet. I am furious. That ass left us all, his pack, IN BATTLE to see her!

I am about to step out of the tree line when I hear Kikyo's voice, "InuYasha, you know you need to choose. You need to let one of us go. Kagome deserves to find someone if you aren't going to be it for her, and I deserve to complete my other goals on this plain then rest in peace until I'm reborn as her if you aren't going to be with me." She is staring straight into his eyes and very serious, I smile softly, we had agreed to both say similar things to him I had said my version just before the battle. He got lucky in escaping the need to answer me.

Inu looks at her in shock and tries to back away a bit, he clearly means to avoid the choice. I let Kikyo feel my presence so she won't be to surprised when I enter the clearing. I wait until InuYasha utters his inevitably idiotic answer, "Kikyo, you know I love you, but I need to travel with Kagome, and shes you in the future and really important to me too…" His puppy ears flatten as Kikyo gets the same scowl that's been on my face throughout the encounter.

THAT ASS he LEAVES in the middle of battle and can't even answer ONE of us clearly! Is my last thought before entering the area.


I reach the camp site and pick up my Ipod and speakers hooking them up and putting on the karaoke track to the song I had connected to so strongly whenever Inu went to her. This time I'm ready to let him go, to tell him what I've been feeling, to break any chances off entirely. I know by now Kikyo will have done so in her own way and she should get here just before the idiot, she has wanted to hear the song for a while now. The others looked over but when Shippo saw the speakers he scurried to tell the others to sit back and keep quiet, my kit, he knows me so well. I feel Kikyo's presence and nod in her direction, InuYasha is about to enter camp.

He rushes in loudly and looking worried, "Kagome!"

I look at him and fake the teary eyed look I used to get, when really the recent times he ran off my eyes just dulled and turned flat. "Yes *sniffle* InuYasha."

"Kagome look, I decided, I was about to tell Kikyo that I choose you when you walked in!" he looks panicked, but underneath that I can see smugness. The jerk thinks I'll be soooo happy and forget everything.

I look at him and smirk, blinking away my faked tears and allowed him to see the dull yet righteous quality to them. I can hear my son giggle in the background as Inuyasha's face turns from false panic and real smugness to confusion and REAL worry. I laugh at it too and hear Kikyo trying to stifle her giggles. "Oh? Is that so InuYasha? Because I know you not only left your PACK in the MIDDLE OF A BATTLE to see Kikyo, but evaded our question twice. I know that because of it Kikyo has kicked you to the curb, and now its time for you to SIT down and listen to me." The hanyo plants into the dirt as I press play on my music track.

InuYasha POV *italics are his thoughts*

I hear music play as I groan and fight the enchantment that had slammed me into the ground. I can't believe they planned this! Damn Wenches. My ears perk up as I hear Kagome singing, raw emotions even I can't miss filling the song.

I know I can't take one more step towards you'Cause all that's waiting is regret

Regret really?

Don't you know I'm not your ghost anymore

All those times I called her Kikyo, compared them, the first time I met her I thought she was my lost love… a ghost to me

You lost the love I loved the most

And now I'm losing her too

I learned to live, half aliveAnd now you want me one more time

S-She felt… dead? I think in horror as I hear her sing, every word feels like its coming from her heart… did I hurt her this much?

Who do you think you are?Runnin' 'round leaving scarsCollecting your jar of heartsAnd tearing love apartYou're gonna catch a coldFrom the ice inside your soulSo don't come back for meWho do you think you are?

I sit up to listen, every word is filling me with more guilt, I can't be as bad as she makes me sound! I don't go breaking hearts. Except hers…

I hear you're asking all aroundIf I am anywhere to be foundBut I have grown too strongTo ever fall back in your arms

I've learned to live, half aliveAnd now you want me one more time

As she sings her powers begin wrapping around her, tossing her hair and clothes in glowing winds of Reiki, when did she get so powerful, how did I not notice? Does she really not need me…

Who do you think you are?Runnin' 'round leaving scarsCollecting your jar of heartsAnd tearing love apartYou're gonna catch a coldFrom the ice inside your soulSo don't come back for meWho do you think you are?

It took so long just to feel alrightRemember how to put back the light in my eyesI wish I had missed the first time that we kissed'Cause you broke all your promisesAnd now you're backYou don't get to get me back

Her eyes, they were so dull and sad every time I left, it was so hard to get her to forgive me and each time less of her spark came back, at least when she sees me. Its there for the others, but still not as strong as when we started… But I didn't break any promises! Even as I think this I start to remember all the times I promised I wouldn't sneak off, wouldn't yell, wouldn't hit the runt.

Who do you think you are?Runnin' 'round leaving scarsCollecting your jar of heartsAnd tearing love apartYou're gonna catch a coldFrom the ice inside your soulDon't come back for meDon't come back at all

Is it true, do I have ice in me like my bastard brother?

Who do you think you are?Runnin' 'round leaving scarsCollecting your jar of heartsTearing love apartYou're gonna catch a coldFrom the ice inside your soulDon't come back for meDon't come back at all

Who do you think you are?Who do you think you are?Who do you think you are?

I stay sitting motionless, as Kagome picks up Shippo and receives hugs from Kikyo and Sango. I didn't even notice when Kikyo arrived I was so caught up in the song. How could I have done this to Kagome. Kagome my best and first true friend, the only one to ever really trust me and to love me as I am, hanyo. I didn't protect her, I hurt her.

Kagome POV

I look over at InuYasha from the arms of my son, Kikyo, and Sango. He is sitting in the hole from the sit earlier looking horrified and disgusted, I can tell though that it is self-hate. Kikyo's rejection may not have gotten through to him correctly, but mine did. I shrug off the arms holding me and set my Shippo on my shoulder. "InuYasha." I wait for him to look me in the eye, my eyes which I know are clear and shining again, I am free now after all. When he meets my gaze and holds it I speak again, "InuYasha, you have betrayed your so proclaimed love in two of her lives, broken many promises including one to protect, and have betrayed your alpha. Now that you realize the truth of the situation what do you have to say?"

He drops his gaze from mine in shame and while he musters courage so he can answer Kikyo taps my shoulder, "Alpha?"

Shippo jumps in "Yep! My Mamas the Alpha!" he is practically yelling with a missive grin.

My friends laugh and I giggle before answering in a more detailed and helpful manner, "Yes Kikyo, Alpha. We travel with demons, Inu, the strongest male in our group is a dog demon so we are a pack. I am the leader of the pack, I created us, chose each member to join us and made them family. I'm the one who cares for everyone both mind and body, keeps them healthy, clean, and organized, together, and peaceful. I lead and make decisions for when we take long breaks. Inu is my Beta as the second strongest in the group and our fiercest warrior, he handles minor decisions and the duties of hunting and finding rest spots. I am Alpha." Kikyo stares bewildered at the group as they each nod, even InuYasha nods when he feels her gaze and she looks at me with a new light. I turn back to my puppy eared pack mate.

"InuYasha, you must answer now."

He nods and stands before baring his throat slightly, enough for those looking for it to acknowledge. I nod, he speaks, "I am guilty of all of these things, though I didn't see how bad it was till ya told me like this. I'm so sorry Kikyo, 'Gome. I think I'm starting to understand though."

WOW that song worked better than expected. Hmmm, lets see… "InuYasha, as beta and the demon whose heritage we adapted as our own you know the penalty for these offenses?"

"Yeah" he says going pale, "Death. Death or Banishment for betraying the Alpha, a lot of pain and rank stripped for intentionally harming the Alpha's heir outside of sparring or teaching. And the others are bad but not punishable offenses." He is pretty much shaking now, as much of an idiot he can be, and as bad as his temper is, he realizes the magnitude of what he's done, he could lose his family, the only people who accepted him as his whole self, all because he was to selfish to choose a woman. He may want to fight or kill something right now but he is too scared of losing this to turn it into rage like he usually would.

"InuYasha. You are lucky, I COULD do all of that to you, however as I am not a normal Alpha and its my pack I make the rules. You will not be banished, killed, or beaten." He starts to smile in relief and I can see he thinks all will be forgiven, he's working up to bluster at me for freaking him out. "However." His face pales again, idiot. "You are no longer Beta, you will have to apologize to everyone in our pack you have wronged and gain forgiveness, including from our new pack-sister Kikyo." I grin at the delight and surprise on her face, we had talked about it but I never told her if I would invite her formally or not "if she so chooses to join us." Kikyo nods her acceptance and I smile at her, Sango grabs her and pulls her to the fire area to join the others on the logs we sit on. "You will also need to work on the behaviors that caused this mess, your mistrust, lying, and habits of running off without telling anyone. They are dangerous and unbefitting of our pack, especially from a Beta! Any other consequences will be determined after a month depending on how this goes. Now then stand up, its time for dinner and I think an excellent way to start making up with Shippo is to teach him to hunt." I grin and wink at my best guy friend as my kit hops to his shoulder with a laugh.

Inuyasha smiles and nods, standing up, only to be tackle hugged by me with the others joining in, well Kikyo was PULLED into it hahaha. When we all get up laughing and Kikyo blushing silently the two boys plus Kirara as a spy head of to the forest. Our pack is strong and I am done with InuYasha as anything more than a friend.

Write a Review Did you enjoy my story? Please let me know what you think by leaving a review! Thanks, Megan Biemesderfer
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