Anecdotes from the Story of the Century

Premise

It seems that no matter where he goes, L can't sit normally—and he doesn't go to very many places, in the first place. He can't even sit right on the train they're taking on their way back from their day at the mall.

While Matsuda keeps his eyes trained on the map with his arms wrapped protectively around their boxes and bags, he sits with her and Misa, who are seated parallel to Light. Light leans back with his arms folded across his chest as he eyes L with a funny look for him. L continues to remain seemingly oblivious to the stares and curious pointing he's earning from little children as he clings to the pole like a primate, swinging lazily to and fro as his tattered sneakers keep him supported on the edge of the seat. That blockhead.

She rolls her eyes.

Misa leans over to whisper exactly what she's been thinking in paraphrase: "Ryuzaki can't seem to sit normally anywhere, can he?" She sounds almost sympathetic towards the guy, which comes across as a mild surprise since Misa seldom voices sympathy towards L. She must be in a particularly terrific mood.

"Nope. But that's Ryuzaki for ya," she answers, careful to keep her voice at the same decibel. "It's a shame. Whatever the heck he's doing, right now, maybe that'd be kinda cute. If he were a monkey."

Without actually thinking about it, she peers up towards the ceiling for a moment and mumbles, "Though he kind of already is a monkey, in his own way, isn't he?"

By the time she notices Misa's mischievous giggle, it's already too late. "Oh! So you think he's cute?"

It feels as if the train has braked dead in its tracks…and she wonders why she hasn't flown out of her seat into splatter against the door at the end of the car.

"What? N-no! I never said that!" she sputters a bit louder than she had intended, thrusting her hands out in front of her as though bearing a shield.

Her imaginary shield does nothing to protect her from Misa's finger as it playfully pokes the tip of her nose. "But Elin, Misa just heard you say it. You said that what Ryuzaki's doing would be cute if he was a monkey. Then you said that he already is a monkey. So, you think that his swinging around on the pole is cute. That is called a deductive argument," she says, as though quite proud of herself for drawing the conclusion before her American friend had taken the time to explain the premises.

Being Light's girlfriend must do that to a girl.

The heat from the late afternoon sun pouring through the windows suddenly becomes unbearable. "No, no, I didn't mean it like—look, what I really meant by that was—"

She almost kills herself in trying to get her point across, but something is keeping her mind from telling her mouth what it should say to help her save face.

In the meantime, Misa calls across the aisle with a grin, "Hey, Ryuzaki, didja hear that? Elin just said that you were cute! Like a monkey!"

He stops in mid-swing.

She doesn't even bother to see what Light's facial reaction to this is. Or Matsuda's. Definitely not L's. Instead, she buries her face under the safety of her hat, waiting for the floor underneath her to cave so she can drop out onto the tracks and out of the speeding train, regardless of whether that would kill her.

In a sort of final stand, she settles for grumbling, "No, she doesn't know what she's talking about. I would never say that."

And she remains under her hat for the rest of the ride, and for quite a while afterwards.


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