Haruhi's Best Friend

Episode 4 Part 2

"You're fiancé?"

"Kyoya Senpai?"

"Of course my name is Renge Houshakuji and I'm transferring into Ouran Academy's first year class A tomorrow," The girl introduced.

I finished cleaning after the guest's leftovers and sat with the Hosts, curious about this new girl. Tamaki was in his dark aura in the corner, which was probably due to still feeling insulted by Renge's opinion about him.

"Why's he sulking?" Hikaru asked.

"Cus Mommy was keeping a secret from Daddy," I answered cheekily.

"Whatever why does everyone insist on referring to us as husband and wife?" Kyoya sighed.

"Cus it's funny," I quipped.

"Oh it was a story of love at first sight. I couldn't resist the way you adoring those flowers when you thought no one else was looking. Or when you reached to that poor, little injured kitten," Renge interjected.

"Is she serious?" the twins scoffed.

"Do you think you may have the wrong person?" Haruhi inquired reasonably.

"No way I can recognise my love anywhere!" Renge snapped before continuing to babble "He's a gentle soul that is kind to everyone but asks for nothing in return. He likes solitude but sometimes he gets lonely. He looks like the popular dating sim from Ooki Doki Memorial. You're my real life Ichijo Miabi."

When she was talking the twins ran around yelling for her to stop, whilst Haruhi, Mori and Honey had blank, confused stares. I was laughing at that description of Kyoya.

"Ooki?" Haruhi asked

"Doki?" Honey questioned

"OTAKU?" Tamaki and Hikaru exclaimed

"I've never seen one?" Kaoru exclaimed

"I get it now. You're in love with that character; you projected that love onto me and somehow deluded yourself that we're engaged. I assume this Miabi character probably wears glasses as well," Kyoya stated calmly.

"So she made it up you're not really her fiancé right?" Tamaki asked.

"Well no I don't remember ever asking for her hand in marriage. Besides this is the first time I've ever met the woman," Kyoya answered.

"You could've said something sooner," I muttered.

"According to my research you're in charge with managing the club isn't that true Kyoya?" Renge said excitedly.

"That's right Kyo-Chan's our director," Honey confirmed.

"You're the club's director that's perfect. Oh wow I've always wanted to wear a sandwich board to advertise a business," Renge stated excitedly.

"We don't advertise we're just a Host Club," The twins corrected.

"I've made up my mind from now on I'm going to be the manager of this Host Club," Renge continued ignoring the twin's comments.

"Um listen Kyoya," Tamaki started worriedly.

"Miss Houshakuji is the only daughter of a very important family client. So please be polite and try not to offend her alright," Kyoya interrupted.

"Well boys I can't wait to work with you," Renge spoke happily.

The next day at the Host Club…

There weren't any guests today (except for Rossi of course) so we mainly planned on Host Club activities and our opinions on having a new manager.

"I've thought about it a lot last night and maybe having a lady manager might not be such a bad idea," Tamaki began sharing his opinion.

"Why do you say that?" the twins asked.

"Well it's fairly obvious isn't it Renge has just transferred into the same class as Haruhi. So if Haruhi had a girl friend around it can bring out the female within her. Renge's girly air of tenderness can bring out Haruhi's own femininity."

"Good grief," Both Haruhi and I thought internally.

"Now is our chance to help Haruhi get in touch with her feminine side this is an important project men. She doesn't have anyone in class right now except for those two shady twins that's no good for her," Tamaki continued.

"Like you have room to talk," The Tweeds scoffed.

"Hey everyone you'll be happy to know that your new manager Renge has baked all of you some cookies," Renge greeted as she entered the clubroom.

"Cookies?" I perked up alert.

"Isn't she ladylike? I am so moved by your generosity," Tamaki commented in his usual dramatic tone.

"I didn't bake these cookies for you phony prince," Renge shot down, which of course led to Tamaki going into his dark aura.

"I'm sorry I've burnt them a little bit I did the best I could. And I know exactly what you're going to say," Renge spoke nicely to Kyoya offering him the cookies.

"How are hearts coming out of her hair?" I mused to myself

"Aw you're always so sweet to me Kyoya." She squealed delightedly

"He didn't say anything she just daydreamed a bit." Rossi whispered to me in confusion

"Something tells me she's kooky enough to fit in with this club." I predicted

"She wasn't kidding these cookies really are burned." I hear Honey say whilst eating one

"Don't eat that Mitskuni it's bad for you." Mori advised

This made Renge angry and soon she was chasing poor Honey and Mori around the clubroom with her hair now resembling snakes for some reason.

Haruhi and I tried a cookie each whilst Renge was busy scaring Honey.

"There not that bad at all they've gotta good flavour to them." Haruhi commented

"Cookie." I mumbled contently, snatching the bag away from Haruhi

"May I try?" Hikaru asked Haruhi softly, before taking a seductive bite out of the cookie Haruhi was currently eating

"Uh oh Haruhi you've got crumbs on your face." Kauru remarked bending down to lick Haruhi's face where the crumbs were

Both of them promptly putting me off from eating anymore cookies as I now felt like vomiting.

"DID YOU SEE WHAT THEY JUST DID HE JUST TOOK A BITE OUT OF HER COOKIE AND BLA BLAA INCOHERENT YELLING….!" Tamaki yelled, I couldn't catch all of what he said

"And suddenly the trio of classmates are closer than they ever been before." Kyoya spoke over Tamaki

"Rossi tell me your pure innocent eyes didn't just witness that?" I asked

"Unfortunately they did and now I'm scarred for life. I may never eat cookies again." Rossi muttered

"OW hey what was that for?" the twins moaned after I thwacked them both upside the head

"You scarred my little brother and now he can't eat cookies and for acting like perverts with my best friend." I answered

"Ya know you could've just told me and I would have wiped it off. And if you wanted some sugar has plenty with her." Haruhi remarked

"THAT'S NOT THE WAY YOU'RE MEANT TO ACT HARUHI. YOU HAVE TO BE STRONG AND REJECT THEM BEFORE CASUALLY BRUSHING THEM OFF TO THE SIDE DO YOU UNDERSTAND…" Tamaki exclaimed, holding Haruhi's face

"This is sexual harassment Senpai." Haruhi stated

"SEXUAL HARASSMENT? IF THAT COUNTS AS SEXUAL HARASSMENT THEN THEY'RE TWICE AS GUILTY SOMEONE CALL THE POLICE!" Tamaki continued to shout, I was starting to get a headache

"Cut it out boss we're sorry." The twins interjected

"EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU! ALL OF YOUR CHARACTERS ARE LUKEWARM! Each of you needs to have some sort of dark side do you understand? Girls are vulnerable to young men who are trouble; if you keep carrying on like this it's only a matter of time before the girls get tired of you and stop coming altogether. Are you trying to run my precious Kyoya's business? As your manager it is my duty to change your character backgrounds let's start with you!" Renge ranted pointing to Honey

"If only you are as cute as inside as you are out then you're no different than a baby. So from now on you are the Baby faced Thug." Renge announced, making Honey cry

"And Mori Senpai you are his childhood friend the Flunky. The twins will be basketball players enslaved in their own world. Haruhi you are an Honour student who's constantly being bullied. And as for you Tamaki you're the school ideal who's admired for his good looks but actually has an inferiority complex he's hiding from the world, the Lonely Prince." Renge changed each Hosts character background

"And Kyoya you perfect just the way you are now. So I want you to be as kind and as affectionate as ever kay?" Renge added sweetly

"Thank you I'm honoured." Kyoya responded

"The Lonely Prince, it's true that title is perfect for me." Tamaki stated, in a random dramatic spotlight

"Yeah right she couldn't have been farther from the truth." Haruhi scoffed

"You're not really getting bullied right dearest?" I asked

"Of course not sugar, I would've told ya otherwise." Haruhi answered

"Good just checking."

"Hold on how come you don't need a character change?" Haruhi protested

"Cus I'm not a Host and I am awesome just the way I am." I replied smugly

"Come on Kyoya Senpai."

"You've gotta do something." Hikaru and Kauru urged

"Why it seems like the boss is up for it." Kyoya pointed in the direction Tamaki was posing

"How does this look Renge? Do you think these poses work for a Lonely Prince?" Tamaki asked posing theatrically

"Oh wow you're pretty good at that Tamaki. But you know what would be even more effective if you were standing in the rain." Renge suggested

"Let's just see how this turns out I bet it will be interesting, it always is." Kyoya stated

"Don't think you're going to miss out Tomuru. I have the perfect character for you." Renge told me

"What? But I'm not a Host, I don't need changing I'm delightful." I protested

"You shall be Haruhi's friend who defends him when he's bullied…"

"Oh that doesn't sound so bad."

"But you're secretly madly in love with him!" Renge finished

Spoke to soon.

"…Wait what?" Haruhi and I exclaimed


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