WARNING: Wow, I post a lot of warnings, don't I? Oh well. Actually, this is really more of a disclaimer than a warning so…
DISCLAIMER: Parts of the following chapter are just a tad more EXTREMELY DRAMATIC than usual but don't worry, its not a permanent change. But I don't think Sam liked angry-Quinn quite as much as I did….no, he definitely didn't..
Sam had driven to Kurt's house in a robotic state, refusing to let himself process what had just happened. He hadn't even realized where he was until he turned off the ignition and walked to the front door. He didn't let himself think about anything that had occurred at Quinn's house until Kurt opened the door and smiled at him.
Then he broke.
The flashes of anger in her eyes, the vase shattered on the fire place, the things she'd said and how she'd said them..
...Fuck you, all of you….
You blond fuck
It all came at him at once, like a machine gun firing right into his brain. He couldn't hold himself together anymore, and when he saw Kurt's smile turn to concern, he no longer felt like he had to.
His shoulders were shaking before he even stepped through the threshold, and by the time Kurt's arm were around him he was sobbing harder than he had in years. The hate in Quinn's eyes had been overwhelming and Sam hated himself because he knew he brought that hate on himself. He had done that to her, made her say those things and act that way. It was his fault.
What was worse, worse than everything that had happened and everything he felt, was that even though Kurt's arms were around him, it wasn't the comforting hug Sam had expected. He had put everything on this, keeping himself together long enough to drive safely to Kurt's house thinking that once he was here everything would be ok. But it wasn't. Kurt was holding him stiffly and loosely, awkwardly patting him on the back.
It was too much.
Sam tried to stop sobbing into Kurt's shoulder long enough to speak.
"S-she was s-so mad….so mad. Please. I need...I can't take it if you, I can't take it...if..y-you.."
Sam choked back his sobs and tried to finish his sentence. The words kept getting stuck in his throat.
He lifted his head up and looked Kurt in the eye. He kept his arms around Kurt's waist though, feeling like he might fall over if he let go.
"I can't take it if you reject me too" he finally managed, all in one go.
Kurt bit his lip and looked at Sam, his eyes red and blood shot. Then he raised his hands up to touch his tear-streaked face before pulling it towards him and kissing him, his mouth enveloping Sam's completely. Finally, Kurt wrapped his arms around Sam properly, and tried to let him know he was here for him, in one long, slow kiss.
Sam resumed his sobbing and shaking as Kurt kissed him, relieved to finally be receiving the comfort he needed. He kissed him back, quickly and desperately. His sobbing tappered off as their kissing intensified. Sam was holding on to Kurt even harder now, and Kurt was running his hands through Sam's hair, trying to match the desperation and intensity in Sam's embraces.
As Sam continued to cling to Kurt, he remained completely unaware of anything else around him...until he heard a loud clanging sound come from across the room.
The two untangled themselves from each other and Sam realized why Kurt had been so reluctant to comfort him at first; they were not alone in the house.
Standing across the room, with an over turned bowl of popcorn at his feet, was a very shocked and confused Finn.
Kurt stood frozen on the spot, with his eyes on the floor. The moment Finn had made his clumsy and poorly-timed entrance, Sam had removed himself from his arms and was now standing next to him with a panicked look on his face.
Kurt knew this would happen.
Had been waiting for it, in fact. The moment someone found out about them, Kurt had known that would be it for Sam. Any minute now Sam was going to smack him in the face, call him a fag and say that their relationship had been nothing more than temporary insanity.Kurt was sure of it.
In a way, it was a relief. No more waiting or dreading, or fearing that each kiss they shared would be the last. He had tried to prepare himself for what he saw as inevitable, but when he saw the hysteria in Sam's eyes, it still hurt. A lot.
The three of them stood there, all unsure of what to do next.
Finn spoke first, sort of.
"...Uhhh…" he said. It wasn't much, but it seemed to wake Sam up from his terrified daze.
"Finn...I just...I..." Sam opened and closed his mouth repeatedly, having spoke with no idea as to what he was going to say. Finn thought back to a week ago, when Sam had stood on his front porch and done the same open-close mouth thing. Sam's weird behavior that day made a lot more sense now, actually.
Finn tried to process what he had seen, and break it down into something he could understand.
"You're Gay" Finn said, pointing accusingly at Sam.
Kurt grimaced at Finn's words, and looked reluctantly up at Sam. Here it comes...he thought sadly, trying to brace himself for an onslaught of insulting, homophobic denial.
Amazingly, none came.
"Yeah, guess so..." Sam said quietly, looking down and taking Kurt's hand in his. Kurt stared up at Sam, unwilling to believe what he just heard.
"What?" he asked, sure he had heard wrong.
Sam shot Kurt a funny look, before turning his eyes back to his shoes.
"Seriously Kurt I don't think I can handle coming out to two people at once, especially since I sort of assumed that you already knew" Sam murmured, still looking at the ground but with a smile now twitching at his lips.
Kurt shrieked happily, and threw himself at Sam, pressing his lips against Sam's in a very happy, but oddly smooshed kiss.
Sam smiled and ran his hand over Kurt's hair, smoothing down the hairs that had become misplaced during their initial embrace. He kissed him back softly, then moved their mouths apart.
"Way to ease Finn into the whole me-being-gay thing" Sam muttered, and Kurt blushed. For a minute, he had actually forgotten that Finn was there at all.
Finn coughed, in lieu of having anything to say. He stood with his hands in his pocket, looking twice as awkward as usual.
"So, uh...that's new..." Finn stammered, looking anywhere but the two boys across the room who were once again locked in each others arms.
"Yeah, fairly new. I'm still figuring things out..." Sam half-smiled at Finn, and Kurt squeezed Sam's hand reassuringly. Sam smiled down at Kurt and cleared his throat.
"Can we sit down, and like talk about this or something?" Sam tried, unsure of how things were supposed to work with the whole "coming-out" thing.
"Ok..." Finn said, moving stiffly to the couch. Sam and Kurt sat down on the couch across from him.
Kurt opened his mouth to speak, but the moment he did the phone rang. "I'll be back in a moment" he said, and rushed to answer the phone in the other room.
Sam and Finn were left alone together, both mentally cursing whoever it was who had called.
"So...how...I mean, what did he..." Finn searched for exactly what he was trying to say. "How did he get you to be gay?"
Sam narrowed his eyes, trying to remember that Finn was just in shock, and also very stupid. He couldn't be held accountable for the things that came from his simple brain.
"Well, see I was in the locker room in a towel and he came in and grabbed my junk, and then I guess I was just infected with the gay-disease" Sam replied sarcastically.
Finn's eyes widened, as though he had taken what Sam said seriously. He opened his mouth, then seem to realize that that was obviously not what had happened, and closed it again.
"Right, sorry. I didnt mean to be insensitive about your...gayness." Finn grumbled quietly. Sam rolled his eyes as Kurt walked back into the room.
"Sorry I took so long, that was my Dad" Kurt said to Finn "He said he's going out to dinner Carole and we should order ourselves a pizza or something, which means you can order a pizza and I'll make myself a salad" As he spoke, Kurt resumed his spot on the couch next to Sam, who was still glaring at Finn.
"So, what'd I miss?" Kurt asked optimistically.
"Not much, I was just inviting Finn to my gay-initiation ceremony where I'll be completely accepted into the gay community and presented with a pink silk shirt, a copy of Cher's entire catalogue, and a shirtless picture of Brad Pitt" Sam snapped.
"...Personally, I've always preferred George Clooney..." Kurt said quietly, looking away. "But your entitled to your opinions".
Sam slumped down in his seat, absent-mindedly moving his hand over Kurt's as he did so. Kurt beamed, and Finn sighed audibly.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean what I said, I'm just having trouble understanding this." Finn explained.
Sam continued to look sour, so Finn went on.
"But just because I don't understand it exactly, doesn't mean I'm not happy for you...two. I mean, I know Kurt's been lonely for a while now and stuff, and you obviously make him happy, so you know...that's good. I mean we could all tell something was different last week, in a good singing-while-he-did-the-dishes-way. So I guess that's you..."
Sam looked at Kurt for confirmation and Kurt smiled and kissed him on the cheek.
Finn blushed, but was determined to be comfortable with his step-brothers new relationship. His initial reaction had been...less than good, and he was determined to make up for it.
"What I'm saying is, I won't, you know...tell anyone, if you don't want me to" Finn looked at Sam and was relieved to see that his angry expression had softened a bit.
"Good" Sam said, "Like I said, I'm still figuring things out, and I want to be able to tell people myself….when I'm ready". Finn nodded understandingly. If he was Sam, he didn't think he would ever tell people. But obviously he didn't know as much about Sam as he thought he did.
Kurt was resting his head on Sam's shoulder, and their hands were folded together in Sam's lap. Sam's thumb was massaging small circles on the back of Kurt's hand, and as Finn watched them together, he smiled. They obviously really liked each other, Finn could tell just from seeing how comfortable they were with together. Finn decided then that he was in full support of this relationship, and totally comfortable with it himself.
Sam leaned down and began to kiss Kurt softly on the mouth, and Finn looked away.
Ok, he was almost totally comfortable with it.
So I am thinking of writing another story from Quinn's perspective, starting from their break up. Any thoughts?