I can't see his face.
Everyday is exhausting- being on edge and their stares boring holes into you , questioning your existence. Everyday is a cyclical event, eat or be eaten. People are fickle. They can trample over you for selfish reasons. Its better to not know them. Its better to be alone.
That was what I had fed my brain every single day.Passing through crowds of faceless people, hearing nothing but noisy static sounds around me. I’m translucent, the lasers of their stares pass right through me. My existence is a hindrance to them and my past is what creates the foundation for their friendship but I’m non-existent, I don’t need to exist for them. As long as they can trample over me, crush me with everything they’ve got and create fragile bonds which can be broken by something as simple as a word, its okay, its fine. Thats the seed I sowed. Thats my punishment.
“Ah, Kim Taehyung right?” I hear a voice.
A person willingly talked to me, how odd.
Ah, that’s right,Its already been seven years since then-I’m not in elementary anymore.
“yes.” I reply, my shaky hands are hidden underneath the desk. A new school year is starting and I made sure to choose a school as far as possible from my previous neighborhood. It takes two subways to reach to this school and at least twenty minutes. “Did I do anything wrong?” I ask. I try to hide the fact that I’m hyperventilating and that my whole body feels like its being rocked back and forth.
“Huh?” The person questions. I can’t see his face. I don’t want to see his face. “Man, you’re funny.” He chuckles. I let out a small gasp-y laugh. “Hey? are you alright? You’re sweating a lot.” He comments. I still can’t see his face. I don’t want to see his face. I don’t want to acknowledge him. “I-I’m sorry.” I say and rush out of my chair.
It would’ve been better if I stayed back.
It would’ve been better if I missed the opening ceremony.