Overwhelming Emotions


Overwhelm Emotions

Genre: Drama Romance AU Reincarnation

Rating: T

Pairing: (mainly) Rivaille x Eren

Summary: Being woven in his dreams and memories, Rivaille was at a loss. The second encounter with a certain boy made it even much worse than he thought it would be, especially when the boy is reaching his hands out to him again.


I don't own Shingeki no Kyojin, but this fanfiction is mine.

© AsakuraHannah on Ffn

Chapter 7 : Surreptitious

Both of them walked inside a café which Eren timidly checked around inside. The café seemed luxurious he noted, he won't order something and just let Rivaille order his as they sat down on the chosen secluded area. The waiter gave the menu to them and told them he would come back once they had decided on what they wanted to order. Rivaille gave a nod and flipped the menu open. He stopped reading the lists of the food when he noticed Eren didn't even budge to open the menu in front of him.

"Order something, I will pay." He said, making Eren jumped slightly in the command. Eren coyly opened the menu and read the list before his eyes widened at the price. It was too high for a high school standard. His green pupil slowly peeking up to Rivaille, surprised when he noticed Rivaille was staring at him, waiting.

"Hurry up and decide, brat." Rivaille clicked his tongue impatiently. Eren closed the menu and grinned nervously.

"I will have what you have. Thanks." He said, making Rivaille raised an eyebrow at him.

"If you say so." He mumbled shortly and called the waiter back to their table. Eren watched as his teacher ordered the food for him. His eyes widened when Rivaille mentioned liquor and spaghetti.

"Water, please!" he quickly said, earning a soft chuckle from Rivaille.

"Just water is alright. As for mine, omelet and coke. Can you bring me a piece of paper and a pen, please? Thanks." Rivaille said, throwing Eren a smug grin as the boy's face turned red, trying to avoid eye contact. The silence engulfed them until the waiter came back with the things Rivaille asked him to bring. Eren slowly raised his head to stare at him when Rivaille started to draw something as soon as the waiter left.

"Just one question. Do you know what this is?" Rivaille said, raising the paper for Eren to what he had just drawn. Eren took the paper from his hand, examined the wings-look alike logo on it. He… just saw it before his eyes a few hours ago, but he wasn't sure if it was only his vision playing tricks into his eyes. He ran his fingers to his temple, Eren slowly shook his head.

"No." Rivaille's hand twitched at the answer.

"Try harder, Eren." He growled; almost sound pleading but Eren shook his head yet again.

"I don't know what is this… but it looked familiar." Eren looked at Rivaille and gave the paper back to him. He could see a slightly relieved in his eyes when he looked into those gray eyes of his. Their fingers brushed against each other, making the younger flinched a little at the contact. Eren retracted his hands away, pursing his lips together as the warm of Rivaille's hand lingered on his fingers.

"Freedom Wings." Rivaille said, putting the paper in front of him. A flash of his dream came to Eren's mind when he heard it. Eren gasped.

"I… I've heard it… in my dreams." Eren admitted with a nod. Rivaille was taken back at that.

"My childhood dream." The brunet added. Hearing the sound of frustrated sigh coming out from Rivaille's lips, Eren puckered his brow.

"Childhood huh?" he clicked his tongue, crumpling the paper.

"Rivaille-san?" Eren asked him to continue when the man remained silent, eyes looking outside the window. A moment later the waiter came back with their meals and Eren quickly stuff his mouth happily. It's not every day he could eat something fancy as now. Being treated for lunch with his teacher was a rare moment, it was like a date. Eren almost choked on his own thought, he couldn't believe what he was thinking just now. He somehow felt relieved when Rivaille broke his thought in the middle of their lunch.

"Eren, I believe that I've told you this before. About my hallucinating and the past life I had said in the infirmary. Do you still want to hear it?" The questioned made the boy stunned.

"I… do." He said shortly. Rivaille shifted his eyes to stare into those enticing green eyes of him.

"What if… I told you that we've met in the past before?" Rivaille shifted nervously, not knowing where to look when those eyes widened slightly, the way those lips opened. Rivaille prepared the worse for the boy's reaction, expecting for Eren to burst out laughing or mocking him. He was staring at him agape when Eren's eyes gleaming in full of curiosity.

"How do I look like that time?" Eren asked excitedly. Rivaille opened his mouth at the question; he quickly covered it before he gave a laugh. He coughed instead, faking laughed at the boy's curious look.

"You surprised me with that question. What do you expect me to answer to that?" Rivaille gave a smirk when Eren pouted. Deep inside, the older man felt that the heavy burden being lifted up little by little. Watching across the boy, he was amused with the way Eren was munching the food hurriedly, snorted when he saw the sauce on Eren's cheek.

"Eat slowly, brat." Eren's green eyes watched in stunned when Rivaille took the nearby tissue and wiped his cheek clean. Eren lost his grip on the fork he was holding, making it cluttered on the plate pretty loudly. Rivaille blinked in surprised at the sound. Eren's face felt like its burning up, he was sure that Rivaille could see his smoldering face as he backed away from the older man's hand.

"I'm sorry. I can clean it myself." Eren said and took another tissue, wiping his mouth several times. He tried his best not to look into the older man's face. Rivaille retracted his hand from the flushing boy, averting his gaze away from Eren's obvious reaction. He tried to act like nothing happened and continue eating his lunch.

"If you are free… tomorrow… we can go somewhere nice and I can tell you the story little by little." Rivaille said after he swallowed.

"Why not now?" the question made Rivaille blinked.

"I have things to do, brat. Such as cleaning the house… Besides the road towards here was taking up a few hours, it would take such a long time to tell the whole stories. Just what time do you want to arrive at home? Do you want to go tomorrow or not?" Eren timidly gave a silent nod at the invitation.

"Okay. Tomorrow that is." Eren said as an answered, eyes looking outside the window as the snow had started to clear up.

Mikasa stared at her sibling when she stood in front of the graveyard. She had texted him that she was in front of their mother's graveyard when Eren came back wearing such an awful crimson face.

"Eren? Are you alright?"

"I'm fine." Eren brought his hand up to his mouth while his other hand clutched his mobile phone tightly. He couldn't believe that he got his teacher's phone number. Eren avoided Mikasa's question look, biting his lower lip as he tried not to smile like an idiot. He kept his hand covering his mouth until they walked outside the grave with Mikasa leading him on the front.

Mikasa raised an eyebrow at Eren who hurriedly ran downstairs, already looking neat and ready to go. It's not usual that her sibling wake up in the morning, usually during Sunday he was still in bed at least until 11 o'clock. Mikasa eyed him suspiciously.

"Eren, are you going somewhere?" She asked while pulling the toasts off from the toaster and put them on the empty clean plate. Eren gave a nod after pausing for a second.

"Uhm yeah. I probably won't be back soon, but I'll be home before dinner." He mumbled, trying to avoid eye contact from the skeptical looking girl. Mikasa gave her sibling the plate of toasts after she put the scramble egg on top of it to Eren. Reminding Eren that he at least had to have breakfast before he go. She was actually making breakfast for her own, but now that the brunet appeared to be in a hurry, she let him have hers. There was no way she made him starving until lunch time.

"If you say so. Are you going with Armin?" Mikasa asked, her eyes never leaving him as Eren took a seat and started eating. Eren paused for a moment, he quickly gave a nod. He hurriedly ate his breakfast before Mikasa asked furthermore. He knew he should keep a secret from her since Mikasa did not seem to like Rivaille that much.

After he finished with his breakfast, Eren quickly walked outside the house, leaving the dishes for Mikasa to do. He hurriedly picked up his phone to text Armin, telling him that if Mikasa asked, he's going with the blonde. Of course his best friend complied. Eren bit his lip nervously, checking his watch. He was sure being a teacher and all, Rivaille must have arrived early before the time they had promised.

His guess was right when he saw the guy standing under the large tree in the middle of the main park of the city. Eren stared at the man who was leaning against the tree, holding a small book while his other hand inside the pants pocket. The shorter man was wearing a long green coat and a scarf, avoiding the cold breeze. Eren blushed at the lean figure before his eyes, he had no idea why, but the man had caught his attention ever since he started talking about his past. The way he slumped his head on the palm of his hand that time in the infirmary, he looked in a deep sorrow for years searching for something. The image burned in his eyes, he could never forget that expression in Rivaille's eyes when he told him that he would listen to all of those stories about reincarnation he had said. The man also told him that the past had included Eren in it. The brunet couldn't help but felt even more curious on the tale. Rivaille promised him that he would tell him everything he remembered today. Eren couldn't wait to listen to all of those dreamlike stories. His lips curved into a smile.

"Rivaille-san." The guy raised his eyes away from the book and he gave a small nod of acknowledgement. He stood properly and walked towards Eren in a slow pace, their eyes never leaving each other. Eren swallowed nervously for a moment until his teacher was right in front of him. He was surprised when Rivaille suddenly flicked his forehead painfully, earning a soft gasped from the boy.

"What was that for?!" Eren grumbled, his cheeks flushing as he brought his hand to rub his sore forehead.

"Quit gawking like you are going to eat me. Let's go. Anywhere you wanted to go?" Rivaille walked away, fully ignoring Eren's sputtering.

"Nothing in particular." Eren pouted as he followed him when Rivaille heading out of the park. Rivaille looked at him, eyebrow rising at the short reply.

"Don't tell me you wanted to go to the amusement park." Rivaille scoffed.

"I didn't say anything, Sensei!" Eren threw him a look, the man obviously older than him, but there's no reason for him to treat Eren like a small child. That retort earned a chuckle from Rivaille, the name calling to remind him about their relationship as a student and teacher. Something which reminded Rivaille that they were once a Superior and an Underling. His lips curved into a thin smile, in both lives, he was older than Eren.

"Stop with that 'Sensei' thing."

"I just want to listen to all your stories about the past life you are talking about." Eren muttered, glaring down at the ground as his shoes stepped on the dirty pavements. His eyes slowly looked up when he heard Rivaille gave a sigh, letting a white fog out from his mouth.

"It won't be like a date then…" Rivaille said, eyes meeting Eren's widened emerald orbs. Those cheeks… turning red again. Rivaille fumed at his reaction. How fast can it be…? He rose an eyebrow, knowing that the boy had fallen but still in denial. Probably because he was older that he could tell when someone at Eren's age was falling in love. The boy was obvious. He pulled Eren's hand, forcing them to hold hands. Eren's hand was pretty cold, Rivaille could feel the nervousness as he gripped the younger hand tightly.

"Calm down, will you? Don't you have gloves?" Rivaille said, he was un-amused to the fact that Eren was so shy just because of holding hands.

"I'm calm. I left my gloves at home" Eren protested when Rivaille half dragging him. Eren watched Rivaille's back when he paced before him, being half pulled like this didn't look like a date at all. He frowned while he strides faster to match Rivaille's steps.

"Stupid brat, the weather is cold." Rivaille said, clutching Eren's hand tightly. When Eren didn't say anything, he continued.

"Which part do you want to hear about? Freedom Wings? The way we were back then? Military forces?" Rivaille was now staring at Eren who picked up his pace to walk beside him.

"Military?" Rivaille gave a nod at Eren's surprised question.

"Yes, we were in the military forces called Scouting Legion that time, fighting Giants who happily devour humanity to extinction." Eren watched Rivaille's eyes stared into a long distance.

"Devour…" Eren's word made those gray eyes turned to look at him. Rivaille let go of his hand, he brought his hand to caress Eren's cheek lightly. Eren felt himself leaned against the hand of his, blushing a bit.

"What about the freedom wings?" Eren whispered his question, feeling the hand on his cheek went rigid. Rivaille pulled his hand away slowly, clenching his hand into a fist. He turned around from those curious green orbs.

"It's our symbol for Freedom. We used 3D Maneuver Gear which made us fly using the fiber and gas to fight those giant monsters. I will show you the 3D Maneuver Gear later in my sketch book. The symbol that I showed you yesterday, it formed wings seeking for freedom. We became the hope of humankind since our team fought bravely against those giants." Rivaille's lips formed into a thin smile when he saw from the corner of his eyes that those emerald orbs were gleaming in marvel.

"Do you remember? That time you were one of our best teammates." Eren shook his head, frowning sadly. He couldn't remember a thing, but he felt his heart throb painfully.

"You look exactly the same as you were back then. I was the Corporal that time and you were my underling. I was in charge of your custody." Rivaille started walking again, telling him each of the things he remembered, pulling Eren along with him. He looked at Eren when the boy clasped their hand together. The raven guy gave a small smile, tightening their hand hold.

Rivaille sat down on the bench they passed by. Eren walked over to the vending machine not far from them, choosing his own drink and Rivaille's. Rivaille waited for Eren who was still crouching before the vending machine. He gazed at him, thinking about the things he needed to tell him. There were too many to talk about, he was confused about which one he should explain to him. When Eren came back with two drinks in his hands, Rivaille took it with a nod. The boy sat down beside him, wrapping his hands around the warm can with a sigh. A white fog coming out from his mouth as he sighed, his mind tried grasping the ideas of their previous life they were having back then. The man did not lie, what he was saying was the truth, every time Rivaille told him something, he could feel his heart stung. Eren felt he had heard all of those things Rivaille was telling him.

Eren's eyes gazed on the river before his eyes, emerald orbs glazing as a flash of memories appear. He had dreamed one of those, but he wasn't sure if it was about their previous life. His brows frowned; he remembered the kiss on his forehead, nose, and cheek. Eren flushed at the memory when he was almost being kissed on the lips in that dream.

"Eren?" Rivaille asked after he lowered his drink down, watching him in concerned.

"How was our relationship back then?" Rivaille halted his movement, to shock to react towards the question being thrown at him. He shifted his eyes away from the curious green eyes.

"Didn't I tell you that we were soldiers? My rank is higher than you."

"Only that?" Eren asked, he could see that Rivaille almost flinched.

"… Yes." Rivaille mumbled, his eyes staring blankly into those shimmering eyes of Eren's. Eren gave a slow nod, why does he have a feeling that Rivaille was lying? Maybe he could hear the truth as the time went on. Eren opened his can and took a drink.

Not far from them, a dirty-blonde guy was gaping at the two with a shock on his face. He couldn't help but to chuckle at the sight in front of him. He was on a short walk with Marco and he was about to go to the vending machine when he spotted the teacher and student, sitting side by side, chatting slightly. This would be good news for the entire class. Jean grinned wickedly.

"Look, Marco. I saw big news coming." Jean called out to him when the black hair guy did not seem to recognize what he was seeing. Marco watched the two for a moment; he could sense the surrounding between the two of them. He then pulled Jean's arm, dragging him away.

"Let's go somewhere else, Jean. I'm sure the two of them wouldn't want to be bothered." Jean gave a grunt of disappointment.

Mikasa glared at Armin when the blonde mutely looked at her, gulping while he took a few steps back.

"Are you saying that Eren did not go out with you?" Mikasa was horrified when he saw Armin alone in the bookstore. She accidentally bumped into him when she was about to turn to the corner section. Armin gave a hesitant nod, fidgeting as Mikasa threw him a panicked expression. She quickly pulled her phone out from her bag, dialing Eren's number.

"Mi-Mikasa. I don't think you should…" Armin stopped and gave a sigh when Eren picked it up. Sorry, Eren. I let her interfere during your date with whoever you are now. Armin averted his blue eyes tiredly from the furious girl.

They were sitting in comfortable silence when Eren's mobile phone suddenly rang pretty loud. The boy jolted in surprise, taking it out from his pants pocket and horrified when he saw who was calling him.

"Crap, Mikasa." Eren cursed, earning an eyebrow rose from Rivaille.

"Did you not tell her that you went out?"

"Well… I'm not telling her who I'm going with…" Eren fumbled on his phone when it gave another ringing.

"Just pick it up, it's so noisy." Rivaille said with a 'tsk'. Eren slowly pressed the call button and brought the phone closer to his ear. Rivaille sighed at him, now it was obvious that Eren had never dated anyone in this life either. The Mikasa was always too over-protective. He couldn't help giving him a funny look when Eren flinched at the shout from the other line. He slowly brought his hand up and patted Eren's head, making the boy looked at him surprised. Let me be your first in this life too…

"Eren, where are you currently? Who are you going out with?" Eren could hear the concern in Mikasa's voice, he groaned tiredly over the phone. Armin must have told her about it or she found it out by herself. Either way, it's annoying.

"Look, Mikasa. I don't feel the need to tell you everything. I mean, let me have some free time alone." Eren looked at Rivaille who watched his every movement in silence. He caught a glimpse of the man's amusement when the brunet was talking with his sister. He squat the hand on top of his head with a blush across his face, fully upset that his teacher was actually treating him like a kid. One over-protective sister was enough, he did not need another one. He could barely hear on the things Mikasa was saying in the other line, grumbling to her.

"I'm fine, Mikasa. Now just leave me alone." With that Eren ended the phone.

"Done?" Rivaille asked in boring look. Eren glared at him, the man was fully enjoying it despite the look on his face.

"Done." He huffed and stood up abruptly.

"Where shall we go now? Is your guardian heading here that we need to change places?"Rivaille did not hide his teasing tone and smirk on his lips. Annoyed, Eren gave him a look and pulled his wrist along and he started walking, surprising the raven-hair man. Where did the shyness go away?

"Let's just move somewhere warmer." Eren mumbled. Much to his surprise, Rivaille suddenly stood before him, snatched the phone from his hand and switching it off. Eren eyed him astounded, taking his phone back when his teacher pushed the phone into his hands.

"When doing a secret date, that is the way it should be, brat." Rivaille was amused when Eren's face could get much redder than before. Rivaille ignored his protests and dragged him into a café, which soon Eren found out that the guy love to hang out in the café to drink coffee and such for a long long time.

Mikasa was gaping at her phone with a disbelieving look. Eren did not just ended the call on her. What happened to the cute and adorable little brother she has? She clenched her mobile for a moment before throwing it in her bag, totally threw her frustration on the act. Armin watched her with a frown and sighed.

"I think you have to admit that, one day, you will have to let him go, Mikasa." Armin mumbled, slowly meeting his blue eyes to Mikasa's darkened look. She turned her face away from him.

"I was just trying to protect him from that teacher, you know what I meant." Mikasa stated, before walking away from Armin. Armin pulled out his phone, checking the text message that Eren sent him this morning. He was pretty sure that the boy never went out secretly with anyone, he'd be the first to know when something happened to his best friend. He knew Eren very well since they were little, he frowned when he read the last message Eren send.

"I'm out with Rivaille-san." The message was clearly surprised him this morning, but he somehow knew even if they tried to hide Eren from the truth of his childhood memories, it would come back to him when he had to know everything. Armin just hopes that Rivaille won't force Eren anything to make him remember something painful. He didn't want Eren to suffer with those memories anymore. Armin gritted his teeth as he clutched his mobile tightly in his hand.

Rivaille stared at Eren who was staring down at the menu timidly, again. He raised an eyebrow when his green eyes looked up at him curiously; surely the boy brought some money with him, didn't he? Rivaille let out an exasperated sigh.

"Eren, just how much did you have in your pocket every week, brat?" Rivaille pulled the menu away from him. Eren gave a sheepish grin at him, which made the man fully irritated.

"Not much." There he said shortly, making Rivaille's eyebrow twitched.

"You can't seriously hang on to Mikasa's part-time job, are you? I know your father is busy and all that stuff…" Rivaille squinting his eyes at the boy who shook his head.

"Sometimes I help out around the school, be it in the library, cleaning, canteen, or any other duties I could take. Sometimes they offer me, sometimes don't. I'm not smart like Mikasa who could take many things in her hands, so I guess I will just focus on my studies and tried to earn little by little." Eren gave a small smile, looking down from the look Rivaille giving him. The boy felt relieved when Rivaille huffed at his answer, and called out the waiter for their order. Once Rivaille finished to order, he looked at Eren who kept silently in front of him.

"I'm paying, if that makes you relieve." The dark hair man couldn't help but to roll his eyes when Eren threw him a joyful expression.

"Rivaille-san, you said yesterday that you went to the military on your own free will in this life. Does that have something to do with your past life?" Rivaille gazed at him for a moment, considering his answers, he clasped his hands together and put them on the table in front of him.

"Yes, indeed. I… I felt the need to atone for what was taking place during the previous life… Including the accident which happened during childhood. I was fifteen when the accident taking place. I thought when I went to the military, those painful memories will stop flooding my mind. But, it just won't stop." Eren cocked his head to the side. Fifteen? Meaning he was seventh during that time. Eren leaned forward, trying to get the information better.

"What accident?" Rivaille frowned when Eren questioned him.

"Eren, don't you remember your childhood memories at all?" Eren's eyes turn grim when he heard him, the boy shook his head.

"Looks like I lost it." Eren said shortly, he could watch Rivaille features turn exasperated.

"Eren, you lost your memory! Didn't either Armin or Mikasa explain it to you!?" Rivaille let out a frustrated tone, hand grasping Eren's palm across from him. Eren fidgeted slightly at the touch, he winced when a sharp pain shoot through his temple. He brought his other hand to clutch his temple, hissing in pain.

"Eren?" Rivaille asked in concern when Eren was not clutching his head in pain, earning a grunt in response.

"Strangely it was all foggy, I can't seem to recall anything, Rivaille-san. I tried to ask Mikasa and Armin but they always said that I just forgot." Eren gave a sigh, rubbing his head. It won't stop aching. Rivaille clicked his tongue after hearing the fact. Surely, they couldn't hide it from him forever, right?!

"Eren, did you remember the time when you fell off from the tree?" I need to make him at least remember his childhood before remembering the past life. Seeing Eren's green eyes widened, Rivaille gave a frown at his condition. He became alerted when Eren was now clenching his head with both hands while letting out a grunt of pain.

"Eren…" Rivaille quickly stood up from his seat, bypassing the table towards the boy. He kneeled down in front of him, grabbing his shoulders. Eren's pupils were quivering as he tried to focus on him, Rivaille could see tiny drops of sweat-beads on his forehead. His headache must be excruciating.

"Levi-san…" He whispered before blackened out. Rivaille stared at him stunned at the name calling, quickly caught the boy when he fell forward onto him.

"Eren!" Rivaille shouted when the boy collapse into his arms. The people who were nearby staring at them in worried. The waiter that had brought their food starting to get panic at the scene. Rivaille brows furrowed while he brought Eren in his arms.

"Damn it!" He cursed as he pulled Eren's mobile out from the boy's pocket. He adjusted Eren's weight on his lap, fumbling over the phone. He needed to bring Eren home, but he did not know Eren's house.. He needed either Armin or Mikasa to tell him. No, forget about Mikasa, right now, Armin was the best option. He cursed when Eren's phone was locked in a password. Forget it, he'd bring him home.


I'm sorry if this isn't really a date n.n''

"I… do." He said shortly. (I felt like writing a wedding scene here XDD –escape))

Naaw, go fangirling in the reviewww :3

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