You Only See What You Want To See

Chapter 32

Groaning I woke up. My head hurt; no, not only my head but my whole body. For a moment I didn’t know anymore what had happened. I tried to figure out where I was but I couldn’t feel anything. My feet hung in the air; I couldn’t even touch the earth. As I wanted to move my hands I heard chains ratter.

A shiver ran down my spine when I suddenly remembered again what had happened in the cave. Damn you Kazumi, what have you done?!

“Tora?” a soft quiet voice asked me out of the darkness.

“S-Sakura?” I asked back as I recognized it.

“Yes.” I heard a small relieved smile out of the one word.

“God, what… what happened? We were in this cave, fighting, that puppet had poisoned you-“

“They took us. We’re in a cell, chained to the wall. I’ve been awake for some minutes but no one had entered the cell yet. We’re hostages of the Akatsuki.”

I gulped, still trying to understand what was going on here.

Kazumi, what have you done? I repeated this question in my mind over and over again hoping to get an answer. I didn’t understand what the meaning of all this was, didn’t understand why my friend had helped them kidnapping us.

“They will probably use us to get Naruto which hopefully means that he and the others got away” Sakura said.

“Yes… I just hope that this knucklehead managed to kick this stupid bomber’s ass before Kakashi dragged him away” I grumbled. I heard Sakura utter a brief laugh.

“My my, it seems like you two bitches are enjoying your stay here way too fucking much” an amused voice said suddenly. I guessed that it came outside of the cell, from the hallway.

I growled, balling my hands into fists as I recognized the voice.

“What do you want from us?!” I spat out. I knew it was a stupid question but I just wanted to yell at him.

Hidan chuckled. “I thought you already figured it out bitch. You’ll be the fucking bait to catch that shitty Jinchuriki. But you’re also here because this hot chick wants you for something.”

“What do you mean?” I asked confused. Did he mean Kazumi with ‘hot chick’? If so, what exactly did she want that she helped the Akatsuki making us hostages?

“I don’t know and I don’t fucking care.” I heard him open the door and enter the cell.

“Then get your ass away and bother someone else, idiot!” I hissed at him. I heard him growling in anger but then he chuckled again. Okay, now I was confused indeed. I just insulted him. He should try to kill me in his temper or insult me back with many curse words. But all he did was chuckling.

“Sucks for you bitch because the hot chick asked me to help her… And I’m more than happy to do so.” I could almost see his cruel sadistic smirk and it made my blood run cold.

“Hidan, are you ready?” I almost didn’t recognize her voice. It was so cold, emotionless, dark…

“Kazumi…” I whispered out.

“Of course I fucking am” Hidan said. “So what bitch should I cut up first, the pink or the blind one?”

Kazumi ignored him and I heard her light feet steps as she entered the cell as well.

With a tone that was rid of any emotion she said to us: “How this is going to be is your choice alone. I don’t want to do this, but I need your corporation, especially yours, Sakura Haruno. I need your medical skills to heal one person. As long as you refuse your comrade is going to suffer.”

My eyes widened at this. She couldn’t be serious, could she? I must have understood her wrong. She wouldn’t let Hidan torture me just to force Sakura to heal one of these Akatsuki bastards… right?

“I won’t help any of you!” Sakura hissed angrily but I could hear the slight worry out of it. “I just hope that this person will die from its injuries!”

I didn’t even feel the tiniest bit of feeling out of Kazumi’s voice as she said: “Hidan.”

I heard him laugh as he came closer to me. Suddenly I felt a burning pain in my shoulder and I groaned through gritted teeth, supressing a yell.

“Come on bitch, scream for me” Hidan whispered in my ear and I felt his hot breath tickle my ear.

As an answer I spit in his face which received me a slap.

“Oh, you can’t imagine how much I looked forward to do this. Feeling your suffering will be a drug, your screams pure joy.” He gripped my right arm and exposed my skin. Slowly he cut along my arm, making me hiss. I felt hot blood moving down my skin and dropping onto the floor.

“Stop this you freaking psycho! Let her go!” Sakura yelled.

“Assure me that you will help and he will stop” Kazumi’s cold voice said.

“Like Hell I would” Hidan growled. “I’m just about to warm up.”

“Sakura, don’t” I said quietly, panting quicker. “I can bear this. Don’t worry.”

Hidan laughed manically. “Are you sure about it, bitch?” A stab in my leg followed. Again I hold in a scream.


Kazumi watched as Hidan tortured Tora. She stood there and only watched. Cold, emotionless, with a blank face she turned to look at Sakura because she didn’t want to see the blood. She didn’t want to see Tora in pain. She didn’t want to see Hidan enjoying all this. Hearing Tora’s yelps and groans, and Hidan’s insane laughter was already bad enough for her.

I’m sorry…

She watched the pink haired girl, hoping to find signs of surrender in her desperate eyes, hoping that she would give in soon so that she could drag Hidan away from Tora.

But Sakura was strong, as Tora was. They refused to cooperate, refused to help her. Why should they after all? She sold her best friend to the Akatsuki, she asked Pain for some time with Tora to make the medic help them, and she watched as a psychopath tortured her friend like she had told him to do.

I’m sorry…

But Kazumi had to do this. For the man she loved, for Itachi. Sakura was her last hope. This girl was Tsunade’s student; the last one who she could imagine could heal that terrible wound of Itachi, who could prevent him from dying.

She couldn’t lose him; he was the one who prevented her from going completely insane in this group of killing, unloving monsters with no regrets. He was the only light in her current life, in this world that was so black and cruel and forced her to kill innocent people. He was the only one whom she could trust. That’s why she had to help him. Even though she had to betray her friend, even though she had to destroy the last bond she had.

I’m sorry…

Tora’s first scream echoed through the cell. Kazumi’s head snapped to her direction, just to see that Hidan had pierced through Tora’s foot. She could see the tears flow from Tora’s milky blind eyes, mixing with the blood.

Kazumi looked away, to Sakura who had bit her under lip bloody in anger and helplessness.

Give in… Kazumi pleaded her in her mind. Just give in…

“S-Stop… p-please.” Kazumi almost sighed in relief. “I’m helping you. Just… stop hurting her.”

Kazumi nodded, endless relief rolling through her body.

“Hidan, that’s enough. Go now.” Her voice was cold again. Hidan turned to look at her with angry narrowed eyes. “Fuck you bitch, I’m not done yet!”

“Yes you are. This was the deal, now go.” Hidan cursed and insulted her yelling but he left.

Kazumi undid Sakura’s chains and grabbed her arm in a tight grip, guiding her outside. They hadn’t drained the medic’s chakra because she would need it to heal Itachi.

“Don’t try to escape or your friend will suffer more” she threatened. Cooperate Sakura, and then this whole mess will be over soon.

She guided Sakura through the halls to the little sickroom where Itachi already was waiting for her like she had told him to do earlier. He had already stopped trying to convince her to just let him die for some time ago but she knew that he still disagreed with all of this. She could see it in his dark eyes when they looked at her with sadness.

“Itachi has problems with his eyes. Heal him and we’ll let Tora go.” Pain would use Sakura as bait for the Jinchuriki but seeing that she was the one closer to Naruto and that they needed someone who would deliver the message Pain had agreed that Tora could go.

Sakura nodded weakly although her eyes had still a strong, stubborn and angry gaze. But she knew that she had no choice. She probably would have refused longer if Hidan would have tortured her, but it was a different if you are being hurt yourself or watch a friend suffer.

Kazumi stayed in the room the whole time while Sakura was examining Itachi. Pain thought that the medic ninja was about to heal her and that Itachi would watch. There was no reason to tell him the truth.

For a moment she closed her eyes, trying to relax. In a few hours it would be all over. Itachi would be healed, Tora would be back in Konoha with her friends where she belonged to and Kazumi would be officially an S-rank ninja. There was no way that anyone would believe her that she was still a spy after what she has done. Not even Tora would believe her. She had separated every bond she had with her friends. The only bond she still had was with Itachi even though he would never forgive her that she had let her friend being tortured to save him.

But she could deal with it afterwards. Now she just wanted him to be healed.

“I can’t heal him.” Kazumi’s eyes snapped open and she looked at Sakura who looked back tiredly but also defiantly. “I never treated a sickness like this, and it’s already spread too far to heal it. There’s nothing I can do, I swear.”

Kazumi just stood there completely numb. She believed Sakura; she could see in her eyes that the girl told the truth.

Everything had been for nothing. Her last hope, shattered into million pieces. Everything that was left was despair.


Itachi saw the shock in Kazumi’s eyes. He could almost see her hope being shattered and it saddened him. That’s why he had wanted her to let him go, to accept that he would die, because he didn’t want to see this helpless destroyed look in her eyes.

He sat up on the bed and stood up, grabbing the medic’s arm. “I bring you back so that you can heal your friend” he said softly to her and guided her out of the room, past Kazumi who just stared into nothingness.

I’m sorry, he thought. But it’s my destiny to die for what I’ve done. This is my redemption.

He led her back to the cell. His eyes widened slightly as he saw Tora’s bloody body still hanging in the chains.

“Tora!” the medic cried out and freed herself from Itachi’s grip to run toward her friend. Quickly she loosened the chains and laid the unconscious girl on the ground. With green glowing hands she treated the injuries.

“You got what you want from me, now go!” she yelled at Itachi with desperation in her eyes. He didn’t say anything but turned around and was about to leave when a whisper stopped him.

“Itachi… You… you should have saved her. I-I trusted you. B-But she… she’s now one of you. She’s so cold a-and heartless… Tell me, are you happy now?”

No Tora, I’m not happy, quite the opposite, he thought. I should have stopped Kazumi, I should have stopped her from hurting you and from separating the bond she had with you. Because when I die now, she has nothing and no one left. I don’t know if she can bear this on her own or if it will break her down. That’s why I almost wish I won’t die though it’s not in my hands to decide.

Itachi felt the blind eyes on his back but he didn’t say anything. He just stepped out of the cell and closed the door.

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