Chap 29: Ghirahim's Necklace
"Gina! I'm here!"
"Gina! Please, wake up! You're safe now!"
What was happening?
"Gina! I'm here!"
I felt it now. There were arms around me, holding me against a chest. And that chest was trembling, along with the arms holding me. They were so warm...
"Gina, please, PLEASE wake up." His voice sounded worried and urgent. So much wanting in it, so much desperation.
Why were these arms so familiar?
Something wet hit my face, like rain. Only, it was smaller and warmer.
"Please wake up. I need you."
Then something was against my forehead. They were soft, slightly damp, and so gentle that it was better than kisses from a butterfly.
Something left me. Something very bad and wrong just disappeared from within me. It no longer held me down as its prisoner. I was free.
And I opened my eyes.
I can't quite remember what had just happened, but I knew it wasn't good. It was the feeling in the pit of my stomach, the lump in my throat that I couldn't swallow which told me so.
My eyes focused on his face, his eyes boring into mine. I knew that face...I knew those eyes. Yet why were they filled with water?
I opened my mouth, the name slurring out. "Ghirahim?"
"Gina! You're alright!" He hugged me close to him, lifting me from his lap and holding me tightly to that strong chest. My head fit perfectly on his shoulder. I could smell his scent, one that I couldn't explain. But it smelled so good, it practically made my mouth water and my mind hazy. I loved that smell. I could bathe in it and be happy the rest of my life.
Yet as Ghirahim continued to hold me, practically squeezing the life out of me, I looked around. There was't anything special about the forest. It was the same; trees, dirt, grass, leaves. However, when I looked up at the break in the top of the trees, in the distance, I could have sworn the sky was lit on fire. It made me a feel as though a battle had just ended, and the sun was setting in the right place.
Time slowed for me, as thoughts ran through my head. I was left naked and clueless as to what had just happened. I mean, why did Ghirahim look as though he had just cried? And why was I so tired? Why did I feel as though I had just come back from some horrible event?
He slipped something into my soul and I fell asleep. Then, while I was dreaming, I found myself stuck in the real world without this world, without Ghirahim. Everyone thought I was crazy. And I couldn't get back.
I gasped for air, the fear gripping at me. My skin felt tight as the goosebumps spread over my skin. My hair stood on end and my heart beat furiously. Ghirahim pulled away, looking at me. "Gina?" His voice was full of concern.
"G—Ghirahim..." I managed to choke out. My face contorted into complete loss and sadness as I broke down into a full-out sob. My arms wound their way around his neck and I clung to him as though I were a part of him. As though he would disappear if I let go. It would truly be a cruel joke and a horrible dream if this moment was not real.
Imagine; I wake up to see Ghirahim. Then, the moment I let go of him he disappears and I actually wake up in my bed, staring at my off-white ceiling. I wake up back in that world, where people think I am crazy. It would be the worst thing anyone could ever do to me.
However, Ghirahim sat there with me in his lap, clinging to his neck, crying and sobbing while shouting his name over and over again. He held me close, trying to calm down as though I were a newborn baby. His hands rubbed circles on my back, comforting me as he gently shushed me.
And I realized something...
I could never...never live without Ghirahim.
You may as well be killing me.
Two days. Two days since Ghirahim found me. Two days since Demise had trapped me in that hellish dream. Two days and I felt...empty. Despite Ghirahim being with me—he rarely left my side—I felt so stripped of my being, so naked from what had happened to me in my dream... I didn't die, but I was pretty damn close.
I barely talked. I just clung to Ghirahim as though I were some needy, annoying child. Ghirahim didn't seem to mind—at least he didn't make it seem like he did. He would often times sit with me on his bed, just holding me and telling me that I was alright.
Two days I barely slept, because of the nightmares and the reluctance to go to sleep scared me. I couldn't gather energy while sleeping anymore, for the horrible experience I had would come back to get me.
And for two days I wondered what had happened while I was passed out in the forest. I wondered what had happened to Demise. I wondered how Ghirahim had found me. I wondered how he had woken me up. I wondered how long I was sleeping. Yet these thoughts were never voiced. They were touchy subjects; things I needed to know yet did not want to hear. It would scare me.
One the third day, however, Ghirahim confronted me, to my dismay.
"Gina, please, tell me what happened." Ghirahim begged. He squeezed my hands as reassurance, which I gripped back tightly. I was so happy to be with him again. To see his white hair and lips and annoying outfit. To see the two dark voids known as his eyes. His annoying banter. All those stupid diamonds...I loved all of it.
Yet I shook my head as an answer for him. I refused to tell him anything, really. I didn't want to talk about it. Him asking me about the dream wasn't helping either.
"Gina, please! Are you hurt at all?"
I didn't know to shake my head or nod...I wasn't physically hurt, but I sure as hell was emotionally hurt. I'd been mentally punched, kicked, hit by a train, burned alive, and raped. All that happened within just one thought.
"Gina...please?" He would have pulled his eyebrows together in worry, but he didn't have any. I used to find that so weird. Yet, right now, I loved it. Very, very much.
"Gina, please tell me. I want to help you." Ghirahim's eyes bore into mine. His beautiful dark eyes that held the world in them...
This time, I opened my mouth. It wasn't to tell him the dream. I just needed him to know something... "Ghirahim..." I looked back, his eyes reflecting in mine. I wanted to tell him the rest, but it got caught in my throat. Suddenly, I felt like crying. Not because I was sad or afraid. It was because I was so happy I had the chance to tell him.
"What?" He asked, urgently.
"Ghirahim, I'm so sorry I told you I hated you!" I shouted out, my voice ringing loud and clear. "I didn't really mean it," I further explained. "I DON'T hate you! Don't believe me when I said that I never wanted to see you again, because I want to see you EVERY single day. I always look forward to talking to you! You're probably the first thing that comes across my mind when I wake up. Ghirahim, please believe me when I say I didn't mean any of those horrible things I said back in the desert. I really, really don't—!"
I tried to rush it all out, barely with one gasp of breath. However, Ghirahim cut me off, pulling me in for a hug. One hand was holding me firmly on my back; the other was cupping my head and holding it against his chest. I could hear his heartbeat from where I was positioned. I don't think Ghirahim's ever hugged me so tightly before...
And once again, I felt absolutely safe and happy. Even if something as simple as a tight hug.
"I know Gina, I know. Don't worry about it. I believe you." he confirmed. I nodded my head, but still cried. God, I was such a cry baby.
"I just got so angry at something that doesn't even matter anymore! I didn't know what to do! I just got so angry and I just...I just said it!" I sobbed again, still trying to justify myself.
"Shh...everything is alright now, Gina. You're safe. And I don't care if you yelled at me for a stupid reason." He sighed. "Just calm down and let me keep you in my arms, where I know you're safe." He shushed me, pulling me tighter as I sat in his lap and cried harder than I ever thought I had.
Ghirahim had forgiven my horrible and hateful words as easily as that. Yet, it touched my heart that he was so concerned for me, and that he just wanted to keep me safe. Even as I was crying, I smiled on the inside. Everything would be alright now. Ghirahim was with me and that was all that mattered, right?
I cried my eyes out in Ghirahim's lap. He just held me, telling me that I didn't have to tell him what had actually happened yet, but that he really wanted to know. I would prolong telling him the truth for as long as I could. I didn't want to relive what I had gone through. I just wanted to forget it.
Sometime while I was crying, I fell asleep. I suppose he must have pulled us into bed. Everything was fine at first. He and I were just sleeping, no dreams present. And I knew I was safe with Ghirahim next to me.
However, around 3 in the morning, a nightmare hit me.
Down the hallway, my feel slapped against the tiles. All white. All black. All was normal. All was blah. Something I could not remember. And then diamonds appeared. Ghirahim...he was real. Running, snow, forest. I ran and ran to get to those trees. I tried to get through, but I failed.
Over and over again. All happening, yet not happening. All in different orders.
Ghirahim woke me up, hearing me crying.
I didn't get much sleep at all that night. I refused to.
"Gina, please, tell me what happened after you were asleep." Ghirahim begged, his would-be-eyebrows pulled together in concern. I only shook my head, refusing. "Gina, it's obvious that whatever happened is still causing you to have nightmares. Please, tell me. I can help,"
"How Ghirahim? How can you know that? How do you know whatever you do will help? I'd rather you not know...it'll fade away soon enough," I cowardly drawled.
Ghirahim huffed. "I'm a Demon, Gina. What ever nightmare you had, I can probably reverse the effects. I can reverse the terrors." Yet I still shook my head. I knew the nightmares weren't going to go away. Even if Ghirahim was a demon, though I knew deep down he truly wasn't, he was no where as powerful as Demise. The after curse that Demise had on my soul would not be so easily broken.
Ghirahim sighed, his shoulders sagging. He turned to leave the room. "I have business to attend to with the bokoblins. If you should need me, I will be in the throne room,"
I just sat there by the window, looking out into my sunny world.
Why didn't it seem so sunny to me anymore?
"Ghirahim!" I shouted out, pounding on the tree. "Ghirahim!"
He wasn't real. Ghirahim wasn't real. My world wasn't real. My powers weren't real. I was crazy. I'M CRAZY!
"GHIRAHIM!" I sobbed. "GHIRAHIM!"
"Gina! Wake up!"
I was sweaty and cold and scared. My heart pounded in my chest, Ghirahim holding my shoulders down.
"Wha—what happened?" I asked, looking around wearily.
We were still in Ghirahim's room, in his bed. I was on my back, facing the ceiling with Ghirahim over me. His hands gripped my shoulders firmly but softly. I suppose he had been trying to shake me awake.
"You were having a nightmare again." He grunted. I sighed, resting my hand on my forehead as I sat up in the bed. I was tired, emotionally and physically drained of life. I looked like shit whenever I saw myself in the mirror and I kept Ghirahim up at night as well.
Everything was silent for a moment. The only thing to hear were the crickets from the forest. Then, Ghirahim broke the silence. "Do you think, perhaps, you should go home?"
I yanked my head up at him, my eyes wide with worry and horror. The first thought that flooded my mind was that Ghirahim didn't want me here. He found me annoying. He no longer wanted to be my friend. "What?!" I asked, too loudly, my heart racing even more now. No, I wasn't going to go home—no matter what happened. I was staying in this world. If I went home, I might not be able to get back!
"What I mean is; you haven't slept in three days. You barely talk at all and you just seem...a bit crazed, to say the least," He sighed. "If you go back to wherever you came from, you may calm down a bit,"
I curled my legs up to my chest, gripping them tightly to me and turning the other way from him. Huffing, I closed my eyes. Ghirahim only leaned over my back, resting his hands on my shoulders. "Gina, come on you foolish girl, tell me what is wrong,"
I sighed, opening my mouth hesitantly. "I don't want to leave this world Ghirahim..." I said, just above a whisper.
"I'm afraid that after I leave, it will be gone,"
He chuckled. "What do you mean? Of course it won't be gone! I'll be here waiting for you when you get back," He reasoned.
"Ghirahim, how can you know that for sure? What happens if something goes wrong, and I can no longer get to this world. Then what?"
He was silent, not answering my question. Because he couldn't.
"See, you don't know," I groaned, shaking my head. I had to tell him. Otherwise he wouldn't understand.
"When...when Demise made me fall asleep, I had a nightmare that went on forever...or so it seemed. It felt as though it had gone on for so long that it drove me to insanity. It was such a horrible dream...I keep having shorter versions of that dream every night. That's why I keep waking up screaming,"
"What was it about?" He leaned down, his chest against my back. His arms wound around me, and I leaned into his hold.
"I woke up in my house to see my boring ceiling. And honestly, I had no memory of this world. Ghirahim, for whatever reason, I completely forgot about you and everyone else. When I tried to remember, it felt as though someone were stabbing me in the head. My mother told me that I had fainted at school, and I had a fever." I started to get upset again. My breathing escalated.
"About two days later, everything was a little more normal. I got up, went to school, came home. It was normal..." I bit my lip, whispering. "Too normal. Everything was dull and boring. Nothing had color." Ghirahim hugged me tighter.
"Then, things started to remind me of you, of this world. And then I finally remembered! I remembered you and my world and Daniel, and Link and Zelda...I rushed to the forest to get back here, but when I passed through the trees, it just...they weren't..."
I sobbed again, harder. My tears felt like boiling water against my cheeks. Ghirahim turned me around so that I could cry into his chest. He held me to him, rubbing my back, calming me. And when I could finally get the words out of my mouth coherently, I continued.
"After I got through the trees, people were starting to claim I was mentally insane. They brought me to a therapist, he showed me a picture of you I had drawn...I spilled everything I knew about you, about my world. The doctor said that I just had an overactive imagination." I sighed, shaking my head. "Days passed, and everything stayed the same boring black and white." I paused again. "It was just horrible! And the last thing I said to you was that I hated you! The thought of never seeing you again after that and I—!"
I took a deep breath, calming down as best as I could. "So, I still had to see this doctor. He had me write my adventure with you and my world. When I got up to the part where I came back from Skyloft, I couldn't remember what happened after that. I slowly picked at my memory, and then I got a glimpse of Demise and what he had done! And I just...I lost it. I remember taking the pen on the table...and then I think...I think I stabbed myself in the head."
Ghirahim pulled me even tighter to him, as though he could protect me from the memories haunting me now.
"Then I was just floating in complete darkness, I couldn't feel, hear, smell, touch or remember anything! All I knew twas that I was in there for a LONG time and I couldn't get back to you!"
I clung to him tightly, afraid that he was going to disappear on me once again. It was a stupid thought, but it had good reason behind it. Yet Ghirahim held me, let me cry on him; let me talk hysterically into his chest before I finally calmed down.
"Gina..." He trailed off, looking down to me. I took a deep breath and looked up at him through my bloodshot eyes. I tried to breath though my nose but snot was blocking my way. I snorted it back up through my sinuses, looking back down and wiping my eyes.
"You've been through a lot, and I'm sorry you had to go through that," He started, pressing his head against mine. "And I know it's hard, Gina, but you've got to let go of the worry and enjoy what this world has to offer. I can promise that every time you come into this world, I'll be there for you. What I can't promise is that this world will always be here. That's something I can't control," He explained.
I swallowed the lump in my throat, the pain at the thought of never returning to this world worrying beyond me no end.
"However, there is something that I can give you that will always assure you that this world is real," He continued you. I looked up at him at break-neck speed. "That is, if you want it," My heart stopped for a moment, then started up at a new kind of beat, one of hope and assurance. Ghirahim was going to give me something to keep as a reminder of this world. A gift from Ghirahim.
"Of course I'd want it! I'd want anything you have to give." I nodded, my voice cracking a little. Apparently I still hadn't calmed down from my minor panic attack.
He got up off the bed, walking over to his dresser. I watched him open a box, the one that had once held my necklace the time I had lost it. He reached in and retrieved something that I could not see. "I was planning on giving this to you after I had done more with it. I kept re-doing it because I didn't know if you would like it..." He came back to the bed, sitting down next to me as my legs hung over the edge, I still wasn't able to see what he was hiding in the palm of his hand.
"What is it?" I asked, too curious to hold it in. I sniffed in the snot threatening to drip out of my nose.
Ghirahim held it up now, dangling it from his hand. It swayed a little, catching the shine from the moon through the windows.
I swear to God that my heart stopped beating when I saw what it was. The irony was a little funny, but the object was just...perfect. "Ghirahim..." I whispered lightly, my mouth open in astonishment at the beautiful handcrafted necklace swaying in the night air.
The necklace was literally made up of diamonds; both the shape and the stone. Though, there were three different kinds of colored diamonds; black, a dull kind of clear and dull sort of gold. Each diamond was so small; it was no bigger than my pinky nail.
The diamonds took up the string they were on, and each diamond was separated by a tiny, golden bead. However, they all lead down to the grand spectacle of the necklace itself.
Kind of simple, really; it was just a big, plain, black diamond that hung all by itself from the diamonds surrounding it. It was simple and plain on the outside, but it was all so much more than that.
It assured that my world was real. It was a gift from Ghirahim that he hand made. It reminded me of diamonds, reminding me of Ghirahim and happy times that I had with him in this world. It was more important, more valuable and more beautiful than the broken and now lost necklace I once had.
This necklace was worth more to me than my own life.
"If you don't like it, you don't have to keep it. I'll make you a different one, a better one. It's not that beautiful or anything. I can always make another. I mean, I know you like the color orange, so I thought that maybe the diamond should be or—"
I interrupted him, my voice trembling as I said the words, "Ghirahim, this is the most beautiful thing I've ever seen in my entire life."
He didn't say anything more as I took the necklace from him and held it in my hands as though I were holding the most precious gift anyone could give me—which it was.
"This necklace can't be any more perfect that it already is, Ghirahim. It's the best thing anyone has ever given me. Besides, it doesn't matter what it looks like. What really matters is that you thought of me while you made this, and that you gave it to me." I explained, feeling the tears bubble over my eyes once again.
"You're crying..." Ghirahim stated, running a hand through the hair on the right side of my head, then tilted my head up so that he may look upon my face. I smiled brightly at him, closing my eyes and laughing just a bit.
"Ghirahim, these are tears of joy. I...you..." I took a deep breath to calm myself, laughing again. "Have you ever seen something so beautiful...it just make you want to cry?" I asked, looking down at the necklace again, feeling the smooth surface of the diamond under my thumb.
He chuckled a bit, and pulled me to his chest again, hugging me. "You express things in such an odd way." He was silent for a moment, before continuing. "I couldn't imagine you being any different."
Then he took the necklace, unclasped it and put it against my upper chest. I quickly pulled my hair back so that he could clasp it again. All the while, he explained something to me.
"It's not just a necklace, though. You told me back at the desert that you're other necklace was a reminder of someone that you didn't want to forget. Well, this necklace is a little...special." I wanted to laugh with Ghirahim and tell him that it was already special in its own way, but I stayed silent and touched the black diamond lightly. "I suppose you could say that it's an enchanted necklace. I embowered it so that when you're feeling bad, or you're at your worst, the necklace will remind you of a happy time. I don't know exactly how to explain it, so you'll just have to wait and see how it works," He smiled again, the smile reaching his eyes loud and clear.
I stared at his smile for a moment, and suddenly felt as though a heavy rain that had been pouring over my head for days had finally let up. Like the sun had finally come out and was there to shine on everything with glorious rays that dried all wetness.
"Ghirahim?" I looked up at him, getting his attention.
He turned his head to me. "Yes?" He raised his invisible eyebrow.
I stood up and kneeled on the bed next to him. I took hold of his shoulders to lean on, and then I placed a small kiss right on the corner of his lips. "Thank you, Ghirahim. You have no idea how much this means to me." I indicated to the necklace around my neck.
He was stunned for a moment, before his lips up turned into a smile once more and he chuckled. "You're welcome." And again, he leaned in and stole another kiss from me.
It was just one and it was for a total of three seconds.
But that's all it took for my heart to melt and make me realize that Ghirahim was now one of the most important people in my life.
This time, after Ghirahim and I went back to sleep, I didn't have a nightmare.
I was walking down the hall, not knowing why I was there. That small feeling of me forgetting something edging at my memories.
The familiar fright I had when I realized I had forgotten about Ghirahim and my world again, and the rush of the cold wind on my face as I ran out into the snow to my two trees. The terror I felt when I couldn't get back to my world.
That's when it all changed.
Instead of me falling asleep and waking up to people calling me crazy, a voice called out to me.
I turned, the tears running down my cheeks in the cold air, to stare at the man who had called my name.
Ghirahim was there. He stood in the snowy forest, smiling at me with open, waiting arms as I ran for him.
The nightmare I had feared and had every night finally turned into the best dream that I've had in a long time.
I was no longer afraid.
And it was all because Ghirahim was there to help me through it.