Chapter 4 - Mouth to mouth & Death glares
A/N:Here comes the last part of theblackout.
Apparently, she doesn’t mind being trapped in here, alone with me. That does things to my chest.
She looks so beautiful, so...bah, who am I trying to deceive?,you are not fooling anyone, Grey. Sheisbeautiful...always.
She is having the same reaction to being in this confined space with me, that I am having to being with her.
When she grabbed my hand, it took me by surprise, but then when she let go I really didn’t like it. I took advantage of the situation when my cell startled her by ringing, so I grabbed her hand back, tighter than she initially had and, much to my pleasure, she was in no hurry to let go this time.
When I heard the voice of that stupid photographer, almost whining ‘to come to her aid’, I wanted to hit something, but her behavior pleased me yet again. She didn’t seem to want to be around anyone else but me, not even her roommate.
She isn’t scared of being trapped in the dark with me, and I am elated with her reactions and for being in here with her. Though I can’t imagine what I would’ve felt had it been one of her constant followers in this small space with Anastasia, during a blackout. I probably would’ve torn open the elevator’s door with my own hands, and had that not worked I would’ve even called in a bomb threat, to get a bomb squad down here to get her out immediately.
I’ve never been one to hold hands, I’ve actually never done it before Anastasia. Well not if you don’t count Mia. I smile at the memory of my baby sister, she’s always been overly affectionate, specially with me. But I love her, I’m glad she’s back, eventhough she can be a huge pain sometimes, always meddling...
We were supposed to have a family dinner tonight, to welcome her back home. But Elliot convinced them to make it brunch for tomorrow instead. What lie he fed them to make that happen I have no idea, I was just informed about the change of plans.
And taking into account the happenings of the evening so far, I was more than glad for my brother’s idea, his insistence on me coming here, and for his part on delaying our family’s get together.
Although neither of us seem too eager to leave this elevator, both of us are nervous to actually talk about anything other than superficial pleasantries. I guess one of us is going to have to take the first step, and since I am the one who came to her home, I suppose that should be me.
After a few minutes our eyes started to get used to the dark, and now we are staring at each other. You can’t see everything, but it is better than nothing nonetheless.
“How have you been, Anastasia?”
“Well, I’ve actually been very busy since...er, last time we saw each other, on Thursday. You know, with my last day at work and then finishing packing on Friday; and finally moving today and setting the place up to be marginally acceptable for Kate’s party. I haven’t had much time to myself,” she mumbles without taking a single breath from beginning to end.
I put my free hand against her cheek, look intently into her eyes, and lower my face a bit to be nearer to hers. “Anastasia, breath,”
Her expressive lovely blue eyes, that always tell me so much more than her own words do, get bigger at the closeness between our faces. She swallows and then blinks spasmodically, still not taking her eyes off of me.
I smile down at her. Despite of her beauty and all of her other qualities that mesmerize me, this is one that I haven’t encountered yet in any other woman. She isreal, nothing about her screamed desperate, or artificial, or acted, or fake.
She seems so frail, and yet I know she’s strong.Strong enough to deal with me. Haha. Not something easy to accomplish as I have come to accept. Well, not that I wasn’t aware of how people perceived me, I just never cared. Besides, everything in my life has revolved around that controlling, intimidating persona I play, for a very long time now. But I need that.
“Let me go first?”
She just nods, still wide eyed and jaw slacked, her breathing is a bit faster than normal.
“I’ve been thinking about you, Anastasia,” she blinks twice slowly, and gasps. “It’s been pointed out to me that I can be a tad overbearing, and that plus, because of the situation we were in and our last conversation, that the whole thing between us could’ve become very overwhelming for you.”
“I...” she shakes her head a bit, as if searching for something to say.
“I’m...I am sorry, Anastasia. If I pressed too hard. I just... well, this is as new to me as it is to you. I have never been with someone like you, someone not only so pure and good, but one who is so alien to everything that has been a part of my way of life for so long.
The moment you said ‘yes’ to me, I just...I couldn’t... contain myself. I wanted to start everything with you right away, I just wanted you with me.” I sigh, “I suppose I wasn’t thinking clearly. But I do understand your point of view now, Anastasia. Can you see mine?”
I really hope she did...
She just looks at me for a while. I am getting a little bit worried, “Er, yes you’ve given me a quite thorough explanation. And while I do get where you’re coming from, I must admit I don’t fully understand where it is exactly that you are heading with this.”
“Right, yes well I guess I missed that part. But to be honest, I thought you would catch on to that without me mentioning it.”
She tilts her head to the side and furrows her brows.So adorable, it makes me smile.
“I wondered if you would want to try again. Going into it both knowing that we are going to have to learn to have patience with one another.” I take a deep breath ´cause I don’t think I’m ready for a refusal. I don’t exactly know what one of those feel like, but I know for sure that Ido notwant to experience one with Anastasia. As much as I like´our firsts´, I really don’t want this to be one.
Her eyes grow even bigger than they had before, and she stops breathing altogether. Once again I feel uneasy. So much uncertainty is unnerving.
“Anastasia, breath.” Still, she wouldn’t. It’s like she isn’t hearing me anymore. “Ana”, I remove my hand from hers and the other from her face, and put them on both her shoulders swaying her a little to make her react.
Interesting, though I hope her commotion isn’t due to her considering this a ludicrous idea, but all the opposite.
“You said that if I walked away...“, she shakes her head looking at me straight in the eyes, I can tell she is bemused. But I also know where she was heading with her statement before she cut herself off.
“There wouldn’t be another chance...“, I knew that would come back to hunt me, I’ll have to cross that sentence out from my repertoire with Anastasia, butit isa good line for business strategy.
She nods slightly.
“Well, ego and rash behavior can make a person do and say many stupid things, even if that person is me, believe it or not.” I give her a wink and my cocky grin I know she likes. “I suppose the measure of a man is in knowing when that mistake was made, and in taking actions to fix what was done wrong”, I give her a small more genuine smile, trying to hide the unsetling feeling caused by not knowing the outcome of tonight. Meanwhile I watch her expectantly for something that would indicate what she’s thinking.
I wait and wait until I can’t wait any longer.
“Anastasia, I really need an answer now,” I realize my voice sounded a bit harsher than I intended but I asked her a question and I needed her to answer.
She jumps at my tone, but at least I got her to snap out of it and her eyes seem to refocus on mine.
“You want...you want to be withme...again?“, she says almost as if she was scared of misunderstanding the situation.
“Yes, Anastasia. If you want to give it another try so do I.”
“...But, what aboutourissues from last time? No matter how much I want to be with you, if things are just gonna end up the same way, because of our same differences, it’s just not worth it,” she’s been staring at her feet since she started talking, but hearing my sharp intake of breath after she says that, she looks up at me. “I mean, don’t get me wrong, it is worth to me to try but I wouldn’t want for us to stubbornly attempt something for the sake of trying, if that is only going to make each of us go our own way once again, but this time not in such a cordial way.
I like you Christian, regardless of the nature of our relationship, or lack thereof at the moment, and so I wouldn’t want that to change for any reason...Um, so I guess what I’m trying to say is that I don’t know if it is such a good idea...”
And then she had to go and do it... She bit her lip.
God I really missed seeing that!, but most of all, I missed doing that to her myself.Mmmm, and so I do something else I wanted to do very badly.
I kiss her. Hard.
At first I must’ve taken her by surprise, but in no time it is like nothing bad happened between us. Like we’d never parted. And she kisses me too, with the same passion as mine.
So that’s what we do, with our chests pressed up against each other’s, and my hands roaming her body while hers grab a tight hold on my hair, pulling it, for...well, God knows for how long. But when we break apart we are both gasping for air.
The look in her eyes tell me everything I want to know, in them I see the same fire I feel inside of me.
But I need her to tell me, I need to hear it from her.
“Say it, Anastasia. But for once don’t overanalyze yourself, just feel it, go with what you want, with what you and your body desire. I know what it is, but you need to realize it on your own,youneed to make the decision. I won’t pressure you in any way. It’s up to you.”
She looks up at me as if in trance, and after only a second she gives me...relief,
“Yes, yes Christian. I want to try again. I want to be with you”
And I do the only thing I can in that situation, I kiss her again, and this time I don’t hold back, even if the previous kiss was very passionate, this one is urgent, needy and it feels like the more we kiss the more we need to consume each other.
I press her against the wall, and put one hand on the nape of her neck and the other on the small of her back. She wastes no time to run her hands up my biceps to reach, what I’m starting to believe is her favourite part of me, my unruly hair. She tugs on it hard, and makes me hiss at the feeling.
Oh how I missed this...
I slide the hand I have on her back to her thigh, and reach behind her knee to pull her leg up and around my hip. She gasps at my sudden movements, and then moans in my mouth not separating our lips even once.Oh God, I need more.
I move our bodies to the corner of the wall, and lift her up to sit her on the handrail, -thank God for handrails in elevators!- I grab her wrists and shove them to both sides of her body above her head. This is going so well, that I don’t want to risk it by giving her the chance to try to touch me, and I know she’ll try...
“Christian,” she whimpers while I kiss her neck, so we can get some much needed air into our lungs.
I release one of her wrists, to later grasp it together with the other in only one of my hands this time. I let my free hand wander down her arm, caressing her as I slowly reach for her waist, and on the way there, I ghost my thumb across the side of her breast. She shudders and bucks her hip a little.Naughty girl.
“No moving, Miss Steele,” I grin against her jaw, going for another kiss.
“Tha’s not fair.” She groans.
“No one’s playing here...but then again, maybe we are. Playtime is always my favourite pastime, and wedohave a nice history with elevators, don’t we? it is as if someone had planned this blackout just for us...” Suddenly she freezes, I look her face and she looks stunned.
I move slightly away from her face, so we can talk, “What is it, Anastasia?, what’s wrong?”
“Did you...did you have anything to do with this?, with the lights going out?”
Is she serious?, what does she think I am?
A stalker, my subconscious answers for me. Ok not a great time for Flynn’s psychobabble to make an appearence act.
“What do you mean, Anastasia? Do you think me that desperate?” I say in anger now.
“Um...no, I...I’m sorry, that’s not what I meant.”
“Then what, Anastasia?”
“I just...well, considering on how you used to manage to keep track on me, and on who you are and what you just said about elevators, I tho-”
“You thought what? that I caused a blackout in half the city, to be stuck on an elevator...?
“No, I don’t know what I meant, I’m sorry, it was a stupid thing to say, please don’t be mad”, and then she bites her lip again...
GRRRR!, Son of a-
And I’m kissing her again...what the hell!, why can’t I stay away?
“You’re so exasperating,” I say between kisses
“And just so you know,” I lift my head a bit so we can be eye to eye, to catch her expression, “if I wanted to cause a blackout, it wouldn’t be much of a hurdle for me, you were right about that.” Then I give her the patented Christian Grey, lady killing grin. “But give some credit, the lights went out only downtown...” I say wagging my brows at her. “I never do things half way, you should know that, Miss Steele...”
I start to slide my hand under her top, never breaking contact with her eyes. Her mouth opens a little, and her tongue darts out to lick her lips.So sexy.
I lean down and suck her bottom lip into my mouth, making her moan...
All too soon I hear voices coming from the other side of the door. I open my eyes but don’t stop kissing her, apparently she’s very into it ´cause I don’t think she’s noticed that outside there are people trying tohelpus. I actually wouldn’t call it ´help´ because I wouldn’t mind spending a little more time cooped up in here with her. Things were getting interesting, if you catch my drift.
After the sounds get more pronounced and I assume the others are almost done with the door. I leave her lips, not without giving her a couple of pecks more before. Then I rest my forehead against hers until our breathing start to normalize.
When she opens her eyes and sees mine staring at her, she gives me one of her gorgeous shy smiles.
“We got it!”
“People we are coming in”
“Well that’s it for our incarceration...“, I joke.
She laughs, “Yeah, How long have we been in here anyway?”
“I don’t really know, half an hour to forty-five minutes I take.”
“Why do you think that the power is still out?”
“Who knows,” I raise one of my hands and very lightly, run my fingers across her cheekbone. She lets her face fall to the side to get more contact from my hand. I smile at her, “but more importantly, who cares...” and kiss her nose.
“Not me,” she says looking intently into my eyes.
I mimic the intensity I see in her, and slowly shake my head. “Not me.” I’m rewarded with a small gasp and then a timid smile.
“Ana, Christian, ready or not here we ´come´!”He snorts.
“Elliot”, mutters Ana, shaking her head with an embarrassed grin.
Elliot! I growl internally.
I still have to give him hell for his ridiculous behavior from the other night.
But then again, he did make sure I had tonight. He wanted me and Anastasia to get another shot to make things right together.
So seemingly, according to recent events, I’d have to thank him instead.
Shit! He’ll never let this go.
A sigh of frustration escapes me and Anastasia looks at me questioningly. I smile down at her and use her same tone of annoyance.
“Elliot,” I say.
And then the doors open, and the magic it’s gone. The only smily face looking at us while we hold hands, is that of my brother’s. Miss Kavanagh and the photographer look serious, and not giving anything away. Well, that if you don’t count the animosity towards me. Katherine’s brother, well he’s actually never been rude with me or competitive for that matter, but still, he wants Ana. That’s all I’m gonna say aboutthat.
But he can’t have her. No one can. Only me.
Anastasia is mine.
.~.~.~. .~.~.~. .~.~.~. .~.~.~. .~.~.~. .~.~.~. .~.~.~.
When we get to Anastasia’s apartment, the atmosphere’s still a bit tense because of our ´rescuers´. I leave Anastasia’s gift by the door.
Katherine suddenly takes Ana by the hand, separating our own that had remained clasped all this time. The photographer keeps giving me the stink eye, and Elliot...well, Elliot is Elliot. He is grinning like a fool, wagging his eyebrows at me like there’s no one else around.
When the girls disappear into another room, my brother turns to me once again and gives me a knowing smile.
“Well Christian, what do you have to say about...the blackout?“, he grins smugly, and when he sees my unimpressed expression, starts blinking innocently. And just then the light comes back.
But not a minute too soon though, it’s like it was waiting for Ana and me to get out of the lift...HMM,Interesting, but like I said to her at the Heathman, ‘what is it about elevators?’.
I sober up and take a deep breath, reading myself to deal with my brother.
I stare at him and shake my head a little, letting him know not to fuck with me; though it is pointless, by this point in our lives I know him. He thrives in being annoying.
The other two catch up on the change of energy and decide to take their leave, letting us alone.
“A blackout is a blackout, Elliot. Not much to say about that, is there?“, I retort sarcastically.
“Oh I don’t know, many things happen during blackouts. And thenmany, manyothers occur that most of us have no knowledge of, for example-”
“Enough,” I say curtly.
“ok, ok, chill bro. Change of topic, mom wants you to bring Ana tomorrow, Mia is dying to meet her. I’m bringing Kate as well.”
“I saw her this morning, but I don’t remember saying anything about Anastasia to her,” I give him a pointed look.
“Yeah, well, mom had mentioned Ana to our baby sis after the first time she saw her at your place, but just in case mom hadn’t, I thought it was my brotherly duty to do so regardless.”
Like I said, ASSHOLE!
I mean, don’t get me wrong, I really don’t mind having Anastasia around my family. She’s the type of girl that anyone would be proud to show off in front of others; and to be honest, I kinda enjoyed introducing her to my mom, though I don’t actually understand the reason why. But lets not go into that right now. Anyway, I’ve always found it much simpler and just necessary to keep my personal life separated from them and everyone else.
But with Anastasia, it’s different, everything is different with her. And I find myself wanting everyone to know that she is with me, that she is mine alone.
So I suppose I might as well introduce her to them tomorrow and let things run from there.
“Elliot!“, Anastasia and Katherine - AKA, ‘The dragon lady’ - come back to the living room. Ana’s lips were slightly curved upwards, and her roommate looks more appeased than when they left, though she doesn’t look any happier.
Did I call it or what?, ‘Dragon Lady’, I snort to myself. How can Elliot and Anastasia stand her is beyond me. Sometimes when she looks at me it feels like she wishes she had a Christian Grey voodoo doll to stick pins in.
Like I care. She can be against it all she wants, as long as she doesn’t meddle ill-disposed between Anastasia and me.
Ana walks towards me and starts to blush.So beautiful.
When Elliot sees where my eyes have strayed to, he snorts and, thankfully, takes a hike with ‘hoodoo mistress Kavanagh’.
“Hi”, I give her a smug smile.
“Hi,” she says in a small sweet voice.
I take her hands in mine and run my thumbs against her wrists, on that delicate soft sliver of silky skin. Her eyes turn downwards to look at what I’m doing, and...she bites her bottom lip.
“Anastasia, I think I told you more than once, and very clearly not to bite your lip like that. You know what that does to me,” I say not so gently. But it cannot be helped, seeing her like this makes me want to do some extremely indecorous things to her, considering we are not alone here.
Her eyes widen, she gasps and her jaw falls. After she gets her bearings, she says. “Er...can I...um, can I offer you something to drink?”
“What do you have?“, I ask playfully.
“I’m sure that nothing that can live up to your standards, but I think you could tolerate a beer”, she smiles “what do you say?”
I smile back at her, I suppose I could endure whatever generic brand it is that they brought for tonight. “Of course. What the hell. I figure I´ll be able to stand it,” I sigh loudly and overplaying it.
She shakes her head laughing softly and starts walking towards the kitchen area. I never take my eyes off of her. Watching -and enjoying,greatly- her every move as she goes. It’s nice to see that ass in motion again up close and personal. But, it is not the motion I wish it was doing right now.
Cool your engines Grey, the night is young
I really want to take her to my place now and have her all night long. But I don’t know if that would fall into the category of ´pressuring´ her. I’ll wait to see what she says to my asking her to come to my parents tomorrow. If she says ´yes´, I guess it is as good an excuse as any to tell her to come home with me, so we don’t have to get up so early for me to pick her up to go to Bellevue for brunch.
I’m distracted from my musings when I see the photographer approach her with a very hard and demanding expression on his face. I can’t hear what they’re saying but she’s not smiling anymore, so if that moron doesn’t change his attitude while addressing her, I’ll not only interrupt their conversation now, but I will also be compelled to finally teach him some manners. I still owe him one for the way he treated her the other night at the bar. I don’t care if Anastasia forgave him, what he did is just not right.
I let the last time pass as a request from her and because, technically, I had no rights whatsoever over her back then. But now she’s with me, and no one will disrespect her or make her feel uncomfortable, not even herdearestfriend. Having the pleasure to make him sweat, that will be an added bonus.
Just when I’m about to walk to them, she looks at him straight in the eye and says something. He lowers his head and tilts it down. Then she starts her way back to me.
As it should be. I tell myself
“Here”, she says shyly, and hands me a bottle of beer.
“Thank you, Miss Steele,”
With a mischievous grin she says, “Don’t mention it, Mr. Grey,” there she is, my flirty girl has come out to play.
Oh I like this game with her, she’s so adorable and sexy at the same time, it is such a contradictory quality inherent to her. There are so many dichotomies that represent who she is, and that is another of the reasons why I find myself so taken with her. That’s something that makes her unique to me; she is shy but flirty, inexperienced and pure but passionate and refreshing, delicate and sweet but strong, and... so many others alike.
“Miss Steele, do you have plans for tomorrow?”
“Why? Do you have anything on your mind, Mr. Grey?”
“Oh Miss Steele, I have manymanythings on my mind, and right now a great deal of them include you”
She blushes once more but doesn’t miss a beat,my smart mouthed girl. “Is that so...well why don’t you pick one and tell me, who knows, you might get lucky”
I don’t know whether she meant it the way it sounded to my ears, or if my mind is just always in a dirty place when it comes to her. “Really...Is that a promise, Miss Steele?“, I raise one eyebrow at her.
Her blush turns a brighter kind of red, it is so enticing, so appealing, and it calls to some place very deep inside of me. “Er...,” She clears her throat, but then she gets it together like the trooper she is and gives me one of her naughty smiles, “If the offer is interesting enough, I suppose I could be persuaded to comply, Sir.”
She called me Sir. And she knows what she is doing. She’s taking this game too far. Now all bets are off. I was willing to leave this up to her, take it slow, but now I’m going to have to turn the charm on. There’s no way she’ll escape me tonight.
She’s coming home with me.