Therapy Cruise

Losers Babe Part 2

Beast Boy's palm felt all sweaty in Raven's, but he gripped her hand tightly, tugging her down the long tunnel through the aquarium.

"Beast Boy where are you taking me?" She grumbled.

"Somewhere, but first we have ta stop at my room. I gotta change."

Her head was filled with eccentric date ideas she figured he'd try to pull. Creating a stink bomb which would incapacitate everyone on board, hocking loogies out the portholes and watching them land on passengers, starting a food fight in one of the restaurants, nothing was above him.

"This better not be another one of your less than brilliant ideas."

"Relax Rae, I got it all planned out."

"That's what I'm worried about."

She allowed him to drag her further and further into the tunnel until they stopped in front of his door. Turning to face her with a toothy grin, he invited her inside. Casually she followed behind him, easing the door closed. When she turned to find him, he'd disappeared into the closet, so she made herself comfortable on the bed, waiting.

"Can you at least tell me the name of the place?"

"Nope, it's a surprise." His voice echoed from inside the closet.

Raven yawned and stretched, pulling the satin sheets over her legs, and resting her head on a pillow. She allowed her eyelids to close a moment, still waiting patiently as Beast Boy fooled around in the closet. When he walked out, she was completely sprawled out across the bed, her feet tangled in his sheets.

"Come on Rae," he tapped her gently, but she ignored him, clinging to her pillow.

"Dude, you still have to get dressed. Come on." He tapped her again. This time she smacked him over the head with the pillow, and laid back down. Finding this mildly amusing, but also growing impatient, he ripped the covers away from her, laughing as she tumbled off the bed.

"BEAST BOY!" She snarled.

"Yep, that's my name." He chuckled. "Hey, you started it and you're going to make us late for our date."

"Since when have you ever cared about being on time?" Sneering, she kicked his feet out from beneath him, and he landed on the floor beside her. She had some nerve he thought, rubbing his head. He sat up. He would have been irritated if it wasn't for the fact that he was used to her giving him grief.

Raven sat up, rubbing her head.

"You look like hell." He laughed. She barred her teeth at him. Although he teased her, he was really thinking how crazy sexy she looked. His eyes were glued to her.

Giving her a long, exaggerated, eye roll he tried to pull her to her feet. For their date he'd planned to take her to one of the most expensive restaurants on board (he had a private savings not unlike the rest of the Titans). The restaurant, however, stopped seating newcomers by 8pm, and although Raven was gorgeous already, she wasn't exactly dressed for the occasion. He planned to buy her a new dress and have her change quickly before the date, but if she kept this game up he knew they wouldn't make it.

"We are definitely gonna be late," he grumbled, shaking his head at her.

"So how do you think they're making out?" Lizzy asked, roosting like a queen on her thrown. She lounged in an old leather recliner, picking at a box of assorted chocolates, offering one to Robin. He refused, continuing to pace her office instead.

He didn't have an exact plan in mind and that bugged him. What he needed was some brilliant way to convince Raven that he wasn't her type, and at the same time, beat Beast Boy at his own stupid game, and so, he needed the ratchet old lady.

"So where have you planned to take the little grey girl for your date?" Bea-, she stopped in mid-sentence, "the green one, mentioned that he was planning to take her out to dinner at The Boudoir."

"I bet he is." Robin snorted.

"So you haven't made any plans then?"

"Tried planning a date once, didn't like it."

"Well couldn't you jus-


"How abou-"


Reaching into the top drawer of her in-table, Lizzy pulled out a Chinese fan, and fanned herself. "You're giving me a hot flash doll, I thought you wanted to win this competition and prove that the grey girl is interested in you and not- the other one."

Robin shrugged, "Yeah, but I profile criminals for a living. I think I can tell when a girl likes me. Especially when she's been on my team for 10 years. I just need to convince her not to, and put Beast Boy in his place in the process."

Becoming bored with Robin's rambling. Lizzy traded her fan for another chocolate delicacy. Robin continued to pace, and she continued to chew, dawning a bored expression; her apathy, however, failed to shut him up.

"Are you finished?"

Robin shot her a dirty look.

Licking her index finger, she turned a page in Raven diary, belting out the passage. When she finished she turned to Robin, eyeing him expectantly.


"My gosh you're stupid dear. If you want to ditch the girl, you have to turn her on to turn her off."


"REVERSE PSYCHOLOGY, pay a little too much attention to her and she'll get sick of you, works all the time hun'." She smiled, popping another chocolate into her mouth.

Reverse psychology, was it really that simple? Robin wondered. It worked with criminals, but could it work with women too? He shrugged. Why not he thought. Snatching the box of chocolates from Lizzy, he collapsed on the adjacent arm chair listening to the crazy old lady blabber on about her plan.

It was getting later, the sun was dipping into the ocean like a giant orange cookie, but Catherina was yet to be seen or heard from.

Cyborg was beginning to wonder if she'd ever show up. All he wanted to do was apologize for standing her up the other day and explain what had happened. He' d called her earlier that morning, and over the phone she sounded understanding, but maybe this was just her way of getting back at him, women could be manipulative like that.

"Girl better answer." He mumbled, growing impatient. Picking up his phone, he began to dial her number, but before he could, he was met by her menacing brown eyes. She tossed her waste length curls over her shoulder and took a spot next to him under the umbrella of the poolside lounge table.

"Sooo…" He laughed nervously, reading the pissed off expression on her face.

"Don't you Sooo me you stood me up that's what you did you know what you did! You think my time isn't valuable I have valuable time you know all the guys that want to date me who are more respectful than you! Don't play with me you giant washing machine I'm not playing with you!"-and on and on she went.

Mustering up a smile, Cyborg offered to buy her a lemonade.

"Oh you think that's gonna distract me huh that's not gonna distract me no oh nooo not after what you did! You know how long I waited up for you do you know all the things I coulda been doing!"

Cyborg massaged his temples, giving her a sidelong glance.

She wasn't even half finished yet. Who the hell did he think he was standing her up! Some kind of jigglo, huh? A player, huh? Her delicate little finger got to waving, while her neck, and hips rolled and twisted in agreement with her attitude.

Cyborg only wished she hadn't showed up. She was way waay more woman than he ever needed to deal with.

"Well, I guess you got your wish Raven. I called the restaurant. They've just stopped seating guests."

She didn't respond.



Beast Boy sauntered back into his room from where he was out in the hallway to find a fortress of pillows and blankets, reaching up to the ceiling, piled on his floor.

His eyes widened like a kid with a bowl of ice cream. "Oh dude, this is awesome."

"Want some popcorn?" Raven giggled, chucking a handful at him.

"You don't eat popcorn?" He said folding his arms. "And where'd you get that?"

"Yeah I do, and I don't know," she shrugged, "I found the stuff in the bottom drawer of your dresser. It said complimentary. There was a microwave in there too."

"Wow, we've been here like a week, how come I didn't figure that out?" He pouted.

"Stop being a baby and come watch this movie with me."

Beast Boy starred at Raven like she was a one foot tall leprechaun. "Dude, who are you and what did you do with the real Raven?"

"It's Wicked Scary eIGHHHT." She taunted him, quickly changing the subject.

"Awesome!" He laughed, crawling inside the blanket fort with her.

She rolled over onto her stomach, throwing her head back and giggling. Cute little innocent twit he was.

"So why are you so giggly tonight?" He smiled. "I haven't even told a joke yet."

"I'm just having fun that's all."

"Fun? With me?"

"Yeah, is that a crime?"

"NO!" He gasped "Can it happen more often? I thought hell'd freeze over before you'd ever have fun hanging out with me. Usually you're always like-" He made a face like a zombie imitating Raven's deadpan expression. "Leave me alone while I read my crusty old books and masturbate in my room."

Even Lust didn't find this funny. Raven scowled, smacking Beast Boy as hard as she could with a pillow, which was pretty hard, first time a pillow ever felt like a dang brick.

He busted out laughing, and rolling on the floor, before straightening up, grabbing a handful of popcorn. "Just kiddin Rae." He said through a mouthful.

"You're making us miss the movie." She snapped.

Still snickering from her reaction, he crawled out of the fort to get his water bottle, and grab a second movie.

It was nice to see Raven acting laid back for a change. At first he was disappointed by the fact that she made them miss their date, and believe it or not, by her playfulness; but he quickly let it slide when he realized how chill she was acting. It was actually starting to worry him. Come to think of it, she hadn't been acting "Ravenish" for most of the entire trip, and even before that, what was up with her powers? He thought back to the bunny suit and spedo, shivering. There was this nagging feeling that he should confront her, but if he did, he might end up telling her that they read her diary, then neither of them would find out who her sex dreams were about, let alone live to adulthood.

"How much did I miss?" He asked, ducking his head back into the fort, he realized Raven had made herself more comfortable by taking off her leotard and boots, replacing them with bare feet, and one of his tall tees. He pretended to ignore it, grabbing another handful of popcorn and focusing on the movie. Just as Wicked Scary was about to eat this blonde chick's face off, Raven tossed a piece of popcorn at his head.

"What the heck!" He laughed, shoving her onto the floor, and climbing on top of her without realizing what he was doing.

A sly grin spread across her lips, and she clasped her thighs around his hips, causing his heartbeat to quicken.

"Gotcha." She giggled.

He shifted uncomfortably, but she could tell he was becoming aroused by the pulsing in his nether regions, awkward. Obviously he noticed it too, but that didn't stop Raven.

He pulled away, but she tugged on his shirt, pulling him in closer.

Lust was on Fire.

Knowledge and Wisdom knew that Lust would take every opportunity to use the missing diary to her advantage. Without Raven's input, Lust was free to control Raven's heart, which in turn overruled her mind and other emotions.

"What on earth is she doing guys?"

"Don't be ignorant Timid, what does it look like." Snorted Rude.

"Our Ravie wouldn't do this at all!" Timid cried. "This is so embarrassing, guys we have to do something!"

Knowledge, Wisdom, Brave, Happy, and Rude all looked at each other realizing they were powerless to control Lust.

There were only two emotions that operated Raven's heart, and those two were Love and Lust; but because Raven failed to acknowledge any significant feelings for "HIM" Love was obviously out of the equation. They were all doomed to succeed to Lust's hormonal whims, and she would act them out on whoever she so chose.

Indeed Lust was drawing much energy from Raven's sexual adventures. Wisdom had begun to feel her own energy waning as she suspected the other emotions did as well. If Raven didn't get her heart under control they were all doomed to disappear forever, and the personality of the real Raven would, consequently, disappear as well.

Oh Raven, Wisdom thought, just admit it to yourself already.

Beast Boy finally succeeded in pulling loose from Raven when a knock came at his door. He got up to answer it, while Raven pulled herself together.

He was surprised to see Robin standing in his doorway half dressed. "What the hell are you doing here?"

Pushing past Beast Boy, Robin spotted Raven ducking her head out of the blanket fort, no questions asked, he scooped her up, carrying her off bridal style. Beast Boy was left in the doorway scowling.

"See ya later BB!" Raven waved.

With a pair of binoculars, Lizzy watched as Robin carried Raven into his bedroom, tossing her onto the bed. He stared back at her waiting for an objection.

Smirking, Lizzy popped a chocolate covered cherry into her mouth, giggling as Robin's voice filtered through the little speaker in her ear.

"Okay Lizzy, now what?"

"We've already talked about this. Just do what comes naturally, follow your instincts."

Robin glanced at his lower half, and a bemused grimace spread across his face. That was never good advice, he thought. Raven rose up on her knees, giving him a sultry pout, beckoning him with a finger. He cleared his throat, whispering something to himself.

"Lizzy! It's not working she's acting all sexy and stuff. What do I do?"

Lizzy made chewing noises in the speaker, ignoring him.

He had no choice, but to continue with the plan, damn ass old lady was no help. He should have expected this from her, especially after she locked them in the basement, and stranded them on an island inhabited by pigmies.

Gulping, he approached Raven, but first he took a moment to shut his door, Starfire or Cyborg might happen to walk by or something.

Distracted from her chocolates for only a moment, Lizzy gazed through her binoculars at Robin's door, noticing it was closed. Immediately, she became angered, paying respects with her middle finger before grabbing another chocolate out of her stash.

Inside the bedroom, Robin had joined Raven on his bed, she began kissing along his chest and neck passionately. With each kiss Robin's jaw tightened. She was hot that he couldn't deny, but he was definitely not the one for her. At least that's what he kept telling himself. He found himself slowly pulling away from her as he struggled to proceed with the plan, still hoping that somehow she'd become annoyed or disgusted with him and forget about the whole romance. Though he was trying to remain convincing, he was losing ground.

She tugged on his basketball shorts, but he held them tightly, while attempting to kiss her back.

"Slow down Raven don't you think you're moving a little fast?"

"Things would move faster if you would stop resisting."

"Resisting," he laughed nervously "What makes you say that?" He grabbed his shorts again as she attempted to pull them down for the second time.

She breathed heavily, pulling him in for a kiss. When it finally happened they both jumped as if a earthquake hit. Eyes open, Robin was staring at Raven, and Raven was staring at Robin, but their lips remained pressed against each other.

"Raven I think we need to talk." He said, his voice all garbled by the fact that they were still lip locked.

"We can't talk and kiss at the same time." She replied, her voice equally as garbled.

His mind began racing with a thousand ideas of how to end this. She was supposed to be annoyed by him already, at least that's the way he and Lizzy had planned it, why wasn't it working! Damn you reverse psychology, he thought as Raven began to kiss him even more passionately.

"Wait, wait, wait!" he stuttered, trying to object to her kisses. As he realized she was becoming more aggressive he hoped off the bed, "Ohhkaay I've had enough," he muttered, and Raven followed after him, licking her lips.

"LIZZY HELP!" he hollered, as she tried to tug him back onto the bed with bionic strength.

"Oh now you need my help; well I'm busy dear."

"Oh come on!" He complained. "You're stupid plan isn't working!" Falling off the bed after Raven finally managed to pull him out of his basketball shorts, he crab walked backwards towards the exit, with Raven looming over him like an Amazon woman.

"Stop running dear, you're supposed to be going after her remember. If you want her to lose interest you have to come on strong, women hate that."

Unconvinced, Robin's lips were pulled back in a horrified grimace. He was going to hate himself for this tomorrow, and if the rest of his team ever found out he'd die. He stood level with Raven.

"Come here baby." He grumbled at a barely audible volume, hating himself.

To his disappointment she gladly accepted his invitation. For the second time he kissed her on the lips, and now he realized out of all the girls he'd made out with, she was actually one of the best kissers. He would have laughed if it wasn't for the fact that he had a HUGE problem on his hands. The worst thing was part of him was getting turned on by her advances. That's what he'd been worried about from the start. He was a sane guy after all, and to be completely honest if he didn't know her as Raven he'd have probably tried her out…first on the bed, then in the shower, he smacked himself, see things were getting out of hand already.

Suddenly, his thoughts were interrupted by a bite on his neck. He jumped, and they both fell back against the bed, Robin bumped his head on the headboard. He groaned rubbing his skull, and looking down at her.

Touching the hickey on his neck, he realized she had drawn blood like a damn vampire bat. What's with her? The Raven he knew acted like she didn't notice guys, but then again when he read her diary he found out a lot he would have never guessed.

Staring blankly at her, he raised an eyebrow, but when she reached for her bra strap, he thought, ah what the hell. I tried.

They began kissing heavily again, we're talking full make out status. In the middle of their kissing Robin's ear began to tickle as the speaker in it vibrated.

"Mother! MOTHEER! Are you there! Get your boney old as-"

He ignored it, feeling up Raven's thighs and biting her lower lip. His ear tickled again and he pulled out the ear piece, frowning at it as he reached for her rear end.

"We've got a problem mom, the men say, the other Titans, those Titans East, scoped out the Tower. They'll be in contact with the real Titans pretty soon."

"Hold on a second Raven," he stopped her, pulling his basketball short back on. This he couldn't ignore.

Dave massaged his temples while sipping a glass of Chardonnay with his attractive female pilot in the Bridge. His foolish mother-in-law put him on hold again. Damn that old lady, she's was the worst employee. To think he could have entrusted her with the simplest task of distracting the Titans by posing as a cruise therapist. All she liked to do was eat chocolate and gossip about her ex-husbands, incompetent old bat. The grief he put up with, yesterday she told him she had to cancel the sessions because the leader of the Titans was getting fed up! What the hell did he care! Her job was simply to buy time. It'd take the entire week for his men to finish looting the Tower. Stealing from a bunch of foolish rich people was easy, but stealing from a group of vigilantes was a bit of a challenge. Luckily no one would ever suspect a wealthy "philanthropist" like himself. If he was already rich, what motive would he have to steal? It was brilliant.

Dave turned to see Robin and the rest of the Titans, except Raven, in the doorway. Panicked, but playing it cool, Dave sported his same cheesy grin.

"Enjoying the Cruise Titans? Lovely little boat isn't it Eh he he he."

"Lovely." Beast Boy spat out, venomously.

"Yawl seem upset, is there something I can do for you?"

"Yeah, put your hands behind your back," Cyborg took out a pair of cuffs.

"You thought you could rob us, we're the Titans, how dumb can you be?" said Robin.

"Only a man of the sleaze with no marbles would try and still from innocent people, you, you CHLOREBAG!" yelled Starfire.

Dave gave Robin a sidelong glance, "What did she just call me?"

"Never mind that, you should be more worried about what they're gonna do to you in jail."

Dave backed up slowly, leaning up against his pilot. Her face was riddled with fear.

Cyborg grabbed Dave harshly by the wrist, and he struggled to weasel away.

"You can't do this to me! I'm rich! I'm charitable! I'm no criminal!"

When he realized he was beaten he clutched his heart, fainting. The female pilot screamed, bursting into hysterics immediately catching the attention of the rest of the passengers.

"SHUT UP!" Starfired yelled her eyes glowing with furry.

It was too late, the Pilot's scream drew the attention of everyone on board, her cries blasting through the loud speaker. Everyone, including Lizzy, rushed to the Bridge.

"LOOK WHAT THOSE FREAKS DID TO DAVE!" she exclaimed jumping up and down.


"My word!"

"Those criminals!" Shouted the crowd of passengers.

"That's a shame isn't it Jack?" Phil glanced at his brother.

Jack stared at the incapacitated Dave for a second. "I better get my raise."

Robin looked around the room for something to stand on, his eyes resting on a small wooden crate. He stood on it, drawing everyone's attention.

"You all don't honestly believe her over us! We're the Titans, we're heroes, why would we hurt anyone?"

Everyone became silent, and Robin thought he would easily win them over, but then Lizzy began shouting obscenities, stirring up trouble. She tossed a half-eaten bar of chocolate at his forehead.

"DON'T LISTEN TO HIM! DON'T LISTEN TO ANY OF THEM! They want everyone to believe they're nothing but kind hearted young people, bullshit. I've counseled these "heroes" the entire week and I have nothing to say for them, they're completely unstable, all of them! Especially him!" She pointed her boney finger at Robin.

Robin felt uncomfortable with all the attention he was getting, all the blank and horrified stares.

"Dave's a thief!" Robin shouted. "He's trying to rob us, and he robbed all of you!"

Shocked gasps echoed out of the crowd.

"My son is no such thing. You dirty little man whore!" Lizzy snarled, waving a small black videotape in the air.

"Come see, come see how reliable the Titans really are!" She mocked them. "This will make you all believe."

She couldn't have, he thought, but he thought wrong. She must have recorded it when he was in the room with Raven. There was no way he'd get out of that one. Suddenly, the passengers weren't the only ones confused Cyborg, Starfire, and Beast Boy exchanged baffled glances.

"What's with the videotape Robin?"

"Yeah dude, what's she talking about?"

"I too would like to know Robin."

Robin grew silent. He was dead guilty. There was no doubt about, if he lied now, no one would believe anything he said.

He opened his mouth to speak, but just as he was about to, his phone buzzed. It was Titan's East, the REAL Titan's East.

The Tower was dead empty when the Titans came back, nothing left, Dave's crooks took it all. From the couch, to the TV, to the game station, and even Beast Boy's crappy music collection. They got everything. Naturally, they were all pissed, Beast Boy giving the most dramatic performance. He dropped to his knees, bawling and hugging the floor.

"Get up Beast Boy the cops said they'd have it all back in a few days." Cyborg grumbled heading off to his room to crash. Starfire followed suit, heading to her room, this left Beast Boy, Robin, and Raven in the common room. Raven waited till she was completely sure that Cyborg and Starfire were gone before speaking.

"I can't believe both of you were too chicken to tell me you had my diary, no balls what-so-ever." Her eyebrows knit together.

Robin and Beast Boy chuckled, exchanging nervous glances. It took the cops confiscating my diary from that old lady just for me to get it back.

Robin raised his finger to speak, but Raven hushed him.

"I don't want to speak to either of you for the next few days."

She glared, giving both a look of death. Beast Boy backed up, leaving the room. I'll give her a few hours he thought. Robin began to back up too, but just as he was leaving Raven caught him by the back of his shirt.

"And you." She growled.

I guess she's back to normal, he thought, avoiding eye contact, but her eyes burned holes in his skull.

"Burn that tape. What went on the other day, you tell no one."

"Obviously Raven," he responded giving her a blank stare.

"Why'd you- anyway?"

"Lacey black panties, sheer bra, come on Raven, a guy can only resist so much," he admitted, catching a glimpse of Starfire walking down the hall in his peripheral view. He cringed, his face reddening as she passed by.

"Hmph," Starfire snorted, catching sight of the two.

"I think you better take care of that," Raven smirked, and Robin nodded in agreement, but before he walked out he turned to whisper something in her ear. Her face lit up like a cherry, and she dealt him a fatal punch hard to the gut causing him to clutch his stomach and double over in pain. Letting out a winded chuckle he was off, chasing after Starfire.

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