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Digital Twilight

By Goldie5222

Adventure

How it all Began

Prologue: How it all Began

The year is 1663 in the city of London England; there is a 23-year-old male with blond hair and blue eyes. It is 11:00 at night and the boy is out on a raid looking for witches, vampires, and werewolves or any other type of monster. He stumbles upon a real coven of vampires hidden in the London sewers. A chase is in pursuit with the male and the vampires, when suddenly a vampire who was thirsty turned and attacked the young man. Right when the vampire was about to finish the young man something happened and the vampire ran away abandoning to finish his kill.

With the young man realizing he was not dead he thought “My father will kill me if I return home”, so the young man decided to go hide from everyone. He found a cellar filled with potatoes and that was where the young man hid for three days while the fiery transformation took place. 3 days later the young man realized the monster that he became and tried various ways of killing himself. For example jumping off of cliffs or drowning and starving himself. Eventually his thirst grew too strong for him and while hiding, found a herd of passing deer. His instincts immediately took over and he fed on the deer. Once satisfied with his fill he realized that he could survive by drinking animal blood and not on humans.

Over time the young man left London to study different arts eventually as time passed the young man overcame his blood lust in the course of 200 years. This led him to become a brilliant doctor in the new world where his adventure begins.


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Erin Crowley: The concept here is really strong, but the execution is definitely lacking. Tenses, grammar, etc are all off, with at least one or more errors per 'Page' on my phone. The writing style is almost broken- sentences move into each other awkwardly, and are filled with an excess of "filler words", lik...

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