Chapter 32: How Could I Be So Blind?
Silver the next day was quiet and brooding before he confronted his adopted father.
"How do I change back?" Silver asked his father figure this caused Mikage to look at him. "Please tell me there's a way to change back?" Silver pleaded before the blond haired man sighed.
"I don't know, we'll have to see Ootokunishi and see if he can help" Mikage said before patting Silver's head. He also noticed that Silver was more quiet and somber than usual to the point that he would not look at Lily at all.
"I assume that you know why she refuses?" Mikage asked as he looks at the red fox, Silver looks at him weakly before looking down.
"I... I don't want to be a father... why did this have to happen?" he asked weakly causing the man to smile.
"She loves you Silver, she loves you enough to trust you with her. Why is having a baby that is part you and part her?"
"She's having twins Mikage! I doubt that I'll be able to cope with it" Silver scowled. "How long has she known?" Silver barked as he looked at his father figure who smiled softly.
"A week or two ago" This made Silver's eyes go wide in shock.
"And how far along is she?!" Silver asked now looking stunned and horrified by this news, seeing this made Mikage smile softly.
"She's about three months pregnant" Mikage replied softly, however hearing this made Silver sick to his stomach. All this time and they never knew. How could they have not noticed the signs?
"Whether you want to be a father or not, Lily needs you" Mikage said with a light smile. "Besides who's to say that you'll end up like him? You have proved to me time and time and again that you are different"
"It doesn't matter what you say!" Silver hissed "a part of him is still in there! Inside me no matter how hard I try to push it away and once those babies are born, I know that I'll lash out once things get tough" Silver spat coldly, seeing this made Mikage sigh.
"And you wonder why Lily never told you?" Silver looked up sharply. "She was this close to leaving so you wouldn't feel like you were obligated to help or be with her because you would feel forced into something you don't want" Mikage added causing Silver to look down feeling nothing but guilt and resentment.
"Did she not know how I would take that?" Silver asked darkly.
"She did and that's why it hurt Lily more than you'll ever know, she didn't want to think about leaving but if it meant that you would not feel the pain of you past then she would risk it. Besides even if you had her try and abort the babies, it's too late due to how far along but I must ask you though Silver" Mikage's words made Silver look up "Would you really want to murder the two lives that were created by yours and Lily's hands?" This left Silver blinking before a weak look appeared his face, could he really do that to her and to them? Would he then be able to look at Lily for wanting to be human so badly that he would sacrifice two lives in the process? Somehow he knew deep down that it wasn't just the twins it would be their relationship that would crumble to the point that Lily might not want anything to do with him. The thought of losing her again left him too sick and scared to imagine.
"I'm sorry" Lily looked up from her bed to see Silver looking down with a guilt expression, his ears and tail were down showing that he was being honest. Instead of talking, Lily had turned her head and got out of bed. She almost hissed from the chill but kept her emotions in check. She was not going to bow down and let him treat her like he was doing just because he made the mistake of going behind her back, regardless of his reasons she was not going to have it anymore. If anything Lily was this close to allowing that whore who tried to kill her have Silver and once is out of her life would Lily then pack up her stuff and leave. Only this time she'll remain hidden for good. Her twins did not need the stress and neither did she.
"Lily please talk to me" Lily's heart clenched from how he was now following her, just having him in the room made it hard to change her clothes for he would then see the baby bump. Maybe she could hide out in Shinjirou's home or Kei's until it blows over before moving to the safe house. Either ways she was not going to stay here any longer and the biggest regret? Was that she was forced to say good bye to Mizuki, the shrine spirits, Luca and... Mikage?
Silver as he followed froze from an odd scent which caused him to look at what Lily was looking at, he tilted his head to see that where Lily would sit for lunch had a few plates of food along with what seemed like two pills. Why pills? She wasn't sick or anything she was pregnant.
"Good morning Lily, I trust you slept well" Mikage greeted with a smile while Oishi and Dai stood beside him.
"Um... hi?" Lily blinked as she walked cautiously towards her seat.
"Mizuki's doing chores while Luca is at school today" Mikage explained as she sat down but ignored Silver causing the fox to pout. How long was she going to ignore him now?!
"Okay but what is all this?" Lily asked as she looked at her two plates to see a lot of healthy foods including fruit.
"Well you've been a little under the weather plus after the incident last night I'd have thought that it would be good for you to eat healthily for a change that is if it's okay?" Mikage asked with a disarming smile that left Lily smiling and wincing at the same time.
"It'll help with the baby, plus you have not been taking supplements like you were suppose to" Lily's eyes went open from Mikage's words and looked down at her glass to see two pills beside it.
"How long have you known?" Lily asked feeling nervous and worried about how and if Silver knew, she could only hope not. Mikage smiled as he handed her a fig to which she thanked before nibbling on it weakly.
"Serena told me that you would be pregnant, she also informed me of the signs what you need to have when you were on your date at the amusement park" Mikage watched her continue to nibble as nervous got the best of her.
"Is it alright?" Mikage asked warmly as she continued to look down, she continued to ignore Silver who had curled up beside her and tried to nuzzle her leg. Not trusting her words she nodded meekly.
"I have news Silver Ootokunishi has replied to my letter about your predicament and said that he'll help once we visit" Lily immediately frowned as she crushed the fig without thinking or meaning to, juice from the fig squirted from the pressure before running down her hand but she paid no heed. She was too angry to want anything to do with Silver at the moment, seeing her response made Silver wince and almost shy away knowing that she was still upset about before.
"Lily please eat okay" Mikage urged as he handed her a large towel to clean up her mess.
"Can I have some water please Mikage?" Silver asked only to go rigid as his fur went on its ends thanks to cold water that had been spilled all over him.
"I've lost my appetite" Lily said sweetly before getting up, she grabbed the pills and her healthy fruit juice before walking out the room.
Silence echoed in the room before Mikage released a loud sigh the moment he heard whimpering.
"She hates me" Silver's voice shook as he looked down, his father figure smiled softly knowing that was true but regardless this behaviour wasn't all her doing sadly enough. Thanks to the lesson from Serena his sister figure, he had learned that dragon rage and hormonal imbalances can merge creating a very upset/angry mother that would act out without meaning to while she is pregnant.
"I know that I should have taken her feelings into account but I just want to be human so badly that I didn't think or care about whether she would want me to or not" Silver spoke as tears mixed themselves with the water that had been dripping off of him.
"What's so wrong with being a yōkai fox?" Mikage asked as he took a towel before drying Silver up.
"She will die while I'll be left watching her without growing old, I don't want that" Silver replied glumly.
"Then why didn't you ask Lady Uniliya to shorten your life span?" Mikage blinked in shock, Silver however went rigid before turning to look at him.
"Are you serious?! That's all I had to do?" Silver asked loudly before glaring at his father figure.
"Well there's no guarantee that she will, after all there are those who are meant to die and then those who's lives are cut short from sudden circumstances" Silver winces and looks down knowing that he had done that a lot. "Plus you have to book an appointment with the Lady since like Izanami she hates sudden rude visits" Mikage smiled as he looked at Silver, the very mention of Izanami left him looking away knowing that he had set fire to her familiar's tail in retaliation for almost hurting Lily.
"Once I get back to normal... do you think you could help me get an appointment?" Silver asked weakly, seeing this made Mikage smile as he pats Silver's head.
"We'll see what happens, in the meantime I've arranged for Inari to check up on Lily" Mikage watch Silver stiffen, on hell no!
"That quack?!" Silver cried before Mikage gave him a stern look.
"He is the God of Foxes Silver and he is a good friend, it would do you no favors if you are rude to him" Silver grumbled and scoffed as Mikage dried him up.
"Fine" Silver muttered darkly before looking at the skies with a pensive expression, Mikage as he dried Silver's fur smiled to himself at how Silver was behaving.
"Do you want to see her?" Silver's ear twitched before a sigh left his lips.
"She doesn't want to see me" Silver muttered as he leaned on Mikage's lap.
"Well we will be gone for a while and wouldn't it be good to tell her that you know, that is unless you don't want the babies?" Silver turned to look at him as his tail thumped Mikage's lap lightly.
"The babies and Lily come as a package, she won't chose anything else and even though she's just found out about them. Her bond has grown a lot to the point that she would never want to part from them, it's not just her dragon instincts it's her maternal ones. No mother would want to be part from her child and I can assume that you would know that without a doubt" Silver stiffened and looked down before Mikage strokes his head.
"This is to do with your mother isn't it?" Silver's fur stood on its ends confirming Mikage's suspicions "You don't want Lily to die the same way she did but Silver, Lily is stronger than that and you knew back then that your mother was sick. Even if someone had tampered her meds or not, she was going to die eventually" Mikage spoke in a kind tone while Silver looked down with a frown on his face signalling that he was upset.
"No matter what I still blame myself for her death, if I had done as she had asked she would have still lived. She would have been taken to the hospital and treated sooner" Silver muttered grudgingly causing Mikage to smile softly as he stroked Silver's head.
"We are capable of making mistakes and regrets but Silver, do you want to make the biggest regret and leave them to suffer? All because of a disagreement and the fear of never being good enough?" Silver mulled over Mikage's words as the man brushed his fur after drying him.
As expected Lily refused to see Silver to his dismay but that just fueled his reason to revert back to normal, sure it won't undo what has happened but it was a start and then once that was done he was going to have a talk with his mate about this predicament. Yes he didn't want children but his offspring, his mate neither of them should suffer because of him. In the end of the day he was the father and he had got her pregnant no matter what time period she was in. It was his responsibility and now wasn't the time to turn tail and run no matter how much he wanted to become human, after all it wasn't worth being human if the one he loved dearly was away and out of his life.
"Did you say goodbye regardless?" Mikage asked the saddened fox who looked up showing that he was miserable.
"She wouldn't want to hear me out no matter what I say or do" that left both males brooding after all, pregnant dragons were very scary on some levels.
Lily continued to frown as she sat on her futon with a book about pregnancies in her hands, she was thankful that Silver was now out of her hair since that meant no issues could be made out of nothing.
Maybe it would be better if she did leave.
Lily looked up after reading for a bit, her sadness leaking in the room which left Mizuki coming in after knocking on the door. This alerted the mother to be who had hid the book under her pillow.
"Come in" Lily answered allowing her familiar to enter, in his hands was a tray containing some healthy foods.
"Luca asked me to bring them over" he admitted with a sheepish smile. "Sorry I wish I could cook as well as Silver but I'm only good for making sake" Mizuki's sadness appeared on his face causing her to frown.
"You're more valuable than you'll ever think" Lily said sharply taking him by surprise "Yonomori adored you as you developed in that egg to the moment you hatched and grew up. No matter what Yonomori would never have let you be her familiar if you weren't useful" Lily said with a soft smile that left him speechless. He then sighed before looking down.
"I know you're pregnant and so does Mikage, Luca and Silver I don't know but I knew that once you came back... you weren't a virgin" Lily's eyes went wide in shock from hearing his confession, she looked down and sighed.
"I see..." she looks down with guilty eyes. "I just found out that I was a mother last week" she admitted feeling sadness creep up on her again as she placed her hand on her belly.
"I wasn't sure if you knew or not so I kept quiet, it's the fox isn't it? He's the father?" Mizuki asked bitterly as he looked at her. Lily looks up and nods slightly.
"You're going to have half yōkai children and he was blind to it, what kind of mate is he?" Mizuki asked as he looks at her. Lily looks at him with a weak smile.
"The question is how did I not see this coming?" she commented.
"You should leave him, he doesn't deserve to have a family given what he's done" Mizuki commented.
"Mizuki, it's very hard to explain but I know why Silver is this way compared to you" This took him by surprise.
"Then you know why he talks about regaining lost time?" Mizuki asked, Lily released a weak chuckle.
"Yup but you are not going to like it" This left him confused.
By the time Lily was finished Mizuki was left in shock, his face showed utter disbelief before he looked at the bracelet Lily always wore. To think that Silver and Lily had to go through that had left him wincing from guilt for how he treated Silver from time to time, but at the same time he felt anger for the father who ruined Silver enough to be scared of wanting to have a family. This man left Silver in fear of becoming him and it also did make sense when Lily explained Silver's bad actions. Memory loss and the effects if could cause were too scary to think about.
"You should talk to him" Lily blinked in shock as he looked at her with hesitant eyes. "If you are thinking about leaving him then you should tell him about the twins, if he doesn't want anything to do with them then it'll be best to leave but if he wants you to stay then would you?" Mizuki asked while looking at her.
"Either ways I'm staying by you" Hearing this took Lily by surprise.
"Mizuki no, I don't want you living your life in an isolated house. It's not fair on you and you always wanted to see the human world, I can't do that to you" This made him smile.
"Always selfless to the end" he comments before getting up. "You should talk to him, clear the air before deciding on what you want to do next and I know exactly how to do that" he smiles.
"But- but how?" Lily asks as she tilts her head to the side as she follows her familiar.
"There's something commonly called power spots that help you go to the shrines and temples in this country, they lead to paths that can only be used by Gods and are all connected" Mizuki smiled as he lead her to the entrance. Lily bit her lip as she looked at the entrance.
"But what if I lose my way Mizuki? Then even if I do want to tell him, I'll end up somewhere else" Lily admitted, Mizuki smiled at her.
"You've taken huge burdens, one was to be Mikage's successor, another is to be a mother and aunt for Luca. You are more stronger than you give yourself credit for, compared to when we first met you were unsure of things but now you'll do fine" he gave her an encouraging smile that left Lily stunned. She nodded weakly before looking at the entrance.
"I'll see you soon?" Lily asked with hopeful eyes.
"I'll bring Luca I know that you've arrived" he promised before letting her go into the entrance.
Lily continued to walk before looking down at her belly and began to touch it with thoughtful eyes, she was going to tell him. Regardless of the answer, she was going to raise them whether he wanted them or not and she'll love them unconditionally.
Very soon as Lily walked further, her eyes immediately caught something. Was it a passerby? She wasn't sure but she walked a bit more until she recognized who it was.
"Well well I didn't expect you to be here" Yatori said with a smile, Lily however glared at him.
"What are you doing here?! This is only accessible by Gods!" she yelled angrily.
"If you're going to meet Ootokunishi then you are too late, he's going to be very helpful in helping us resurrect Akura-ou" Yatori smiled "The first thing he'll do is kill Silver for betraying him" causing Lily to glare.
"Like hell!" Lily yelled before throwing ice at him which he dodged with ease. "You really know nothing of Akura-ou" Lily yelled as she attacked him again.
"And you do?" Yatori asked, Lily smirked to his surprise causing him to be caught off guard from an icicle to the back.
"Yup! I spent time talking to him both past and present to know how he ticks in a way" Lily smiles before her eyes narrow "Pitting two brothers against one another is just plain sick and you know it" she hissed darkly before throwing another icicle at him.
Lily's eyes went wide as she dodged what looked like vines before she started to pant from exerting her strength.
"There's one demon I know that had that attack! Don't tell me Yatori absorbed him!" Lily screamed before grabbing a talisman.
"You are starting to irritate me human girl, you have no idea of being so close and yet so far to someone as great as Akura-ou. To not be noticed even for your hard work" Yatori glared as black hands and arms appeared from his hair.
"What is that?" Lily asked as she bit her lip. She then placed it on the floor knowing that she had to get him away from the other shrines, who knows what he would do if he stayed up here. Without warning the ground beneath them vanished causing the pair to fall to the world below them.
Lily gritted her teeth as she braced for impact, without a doubt this would hurt and injure the twins. She shut her eyes and prayed for a miracle, it was then that her mark glowed slightly before a pair of white wings appeared on her back causing Lily to shoot up from the winds. Taking this opportunity she teleported in order hide somewhere from Yatori's sight. Once hidden she sighs as her wings vanish leaving her heart to beat rapidly from fear and adrenaline.
"Come out come out where ever you are Land God" Yatori called before smirking. "Do you still think that you have future with that demon fox?" he asked, Lily however felt her eyes grow sad. After what happened before she highly doubted it now but all the more reason to give it one last chance by telling him.
"Not talking? Then that means you've given up on him then?" Yatori asked with surprise in his voice, Lily narrowed her eyes before turning to face him.
"Like hell" she spat "we've gone through so much to want to give up now" Lily said while glaring at him.
"You still do not understand do you? I guess I'll show you one of my powers"
"And what power are you showing me?" she asked coldly.
"It's the embodiment of life, a humans life you see is like a candle" Yatori shows her the candle "But it will go out from being hit by a gust of wind, a tiny powerless existence like Master Kirihito's body which is no exception. But let me show you Silver's light" Lily blocked her eyes until she saw a huge light house standing behind him.
"This is how strong his light is but yours is another story" Yatori smirked as a candle appeared where her heart was. "It appears that when you gave Master Kirihito your life energy it had made your candle wither more than ever but-" he paused from shock before smirking.
"But what?" Lily snapped as she glared at him.
"It seems that the candles your babies have also been reduced to tiny cinders. Looks like Master Kirihito also took life energy from them and even if they were to be born, they would not last a year before dying" Lily's eyes went wide from the news. No... not them!
"That's a lie I don't believe you!" Lily screamed before a barrier blocked his attack.
"Surely you've noticed that your body has been weakened somehow and your babies rely on you, if you were to die before they are born then they would die to since they need you to live" Yatori chuckles as he tries to break the barrier once a crack appears.
"He's- he's lying! They will live I won't accept this! It can't end like this" she gritted her teeth in anger.
"Looks like you're finally accepting the truth aren't you? Don't worry I'll but the three of you out of your miseries" Yatori was about to attack until something hit him on the head. This made Lily look up and gasp from who she saw.
"Based on Soujoubou's diagnosis as he examined her life force, Miss Lily has only half year to live" Suirou's words echoed n her mind as she sat on Mizuki's white snake.
"She's pregnant as well so what does that mean?" Jirou had sounded worried leaving Lily guilty about making them worry.
"They would die if their due date is after she dies. Her body will not be able to support them once death takes her" was the response of Suirou who sounded saddened by the whole thing.
"It's not fair or right! Why did this have to happen?" Jirou had yelled.
"I don't know but the Soujoubou is not happy, he has asked Lady Serena if she could help him give Lily some more time even if it is borrowed"
Lily looked down while holding the snake, she tried her best not to look like she was upset about something since that would alert Mizuki which was the last thing she wanted.
She couldn't tell Silver now about the twins, this would crush him. After all this time of finding her he had to lose her again over something like this? It wasn't fair? But what could she do? Could she just say hello to Silver and wish him luck before leaving to the safe house, one way or another then if it was her time to die then let it but this way he would not have to know that she was dead in the an unknown house. He would search for her maybe but what would he be able to find if she is in a house containing an anti yōkai barrier?
It would be like looking for something that never existed.
Once she arrived at the grand shrine did the girl get off to greet Mikage who was with Silver and Otohiko.
"How are you doing?" Lily greeted with a weak smile that took the Wind God by surprise.
"I-I am fine" the pink haired man stuttered causing her to chuckle.
"That's good" Lily replied with a sigh, Silver looked at her.
"What are you doing here?" Silver asked causing her to look at him blankly.
"Just checking in on things" she replied blankly before turning her head, this left him wincing which didn't go unnoticed by Otohiko, Mizuki, Essy and Mikage.
"We have things to discuss if you are willing to listen" Otohiko commented causing Lily to nod.
The trio went to a room and sat down in a circle.
"Three nights ago someone trespassed into the grand shrine and stole Lord Ookuninushi's soul and ran away. That night the clerks had spotted a suspicious figure in the grand shrine's courtyard" Otohiko explained "They said that it was like a raccoon, a serpent and a fierce tiger, so right at this moment Ikusagami and the others are searching for it. But in all honesty they have no idea of who is behind this either" Lily looks at them and then at the ground.
"It could be a demon called Yatori" Lily explained this took them by surprise "He told me that Ookuninushi will be useful for helping them resurrect Akura-ou"
"Are you serious?!" Otohiko cried while Mikage went pale. "A low leveled demon was able to capture his soul?"