This is my first OHC story; I want you all to be brutally honest. I want you to tell me if they're in-character or not, what I could do to make it better, and what you liked about this story.
"What about you?" Hikaru, with a huge grin on his mischievous face, asked.
Haruhi tilted her head in question. "What do you mean?"
Kaoru copied his twin's grin. "Well," he said, motioning to his brother, "we told you we had a thing for brunettes. Tamaki admitted he was hot for Frenchies. Honey..." he winced, remembering what the loli-shota decided was attractive and deciding to not even repeat it. "Mori said he liked blondes. Even Kyoya said he liked brown eyes." He paused, waiting to see if the dense girl would get where this was going. When she just stared at him with her wide brown eyes, Kaoru bluntly asked, "So what about you? What do you like?"
Haruhi grimaced. She pushed her glasses up on the bridge of her nose. She refused to wear her contacts today, for reasons the Host Club members could not fathom for the lives of them. She pushed around the rice on her plate with her chopsticks.
Tamaki shot up from his chair. "How dare you ask that!" he shouted, outraged. He's beside the short-haired girl in a second, pulling her to his chest and none-too-gently smoothing her hair, flattening it out against her ears. "Ruining my little girl, you evil, evil twins!"
The sole female member of the Host Club flailed in the arms of the club's so-called father. She was choking on the soft white cloth of his shirt. Kyoya rose a brow at Haruhi's failing attempts to breathe. "You're choking her."
The blonde jumped away as if he'd just been burnt. "I'm sorry!" he fussed. "Are you okay? Did I hurt you? I'm sorry!"
Haruhi fixed her glasses on her nose, regretting not putting on her contacts as the glasses caught on a bit of her hair and tugged. Her cheeks were burning red with lack of air. She gasped for it, then shrugged off Tamaki's suffocating affection as if it hadn't happened. She snapped her chopsticks together, stuffing rice into her cheeks, avoiding the twins' questions.
Honey hopped up and down on Mori's shoulders eagerly. "Haru-chan, what about you?" he insisted, desperately interested in what Haruhi had to say.
"I say she likes redheads," Hikaru boasted. His golden brown eyes glittered in mischief. He flipped his own auburn hair, flashing his brother a saucy smile.
Kaoru shrugged. "Maybe," he allowed. "I think she's into blondes. Isn't that right, Tamaki?"
Tamaki choked on his juice, causing him to spit it out onto his unevenly cooked flounder. He sputtered indigent, half-finished sentences, making the entire restaurant turn to pay attention to the princely Host. Even the cashiers, used to outbreaks such as this because Haruhi insisted they ate here in this commoners' store, were wide-eyed at the blonde's senseless stuttering, all consisting of the words daughter, baby girl, and evil, vile twins. Realizing he would never get a correct sentence out, he settled on shouting, "You dreadful, dreadful twins!"
Haruhi was now blushing a through red, dedicating herself to ignoring the twins and focusing on her food, because if she didn't, she knew she'd be spitting it up soon enough.
The Shadow King smirked, pushing his own glasses up on the bridge of his nose. The action was not missed by the twins. They jumped on it, like lions on deer. "Oh!" they shouted together, and Haruhi had to admit it was slightly creepy. "What about glasses!" This brought on a fresh blot of red onto Haruhi's face, spreading from her neck to her forehead.
Hikaru's cheeks spread into a wide smirk. "That's it, isn't it!" he gasped, and suddenly everyone was interested. Honey hopped off Mori's shoulders and onto the floor, wide eyes staring up at Haruhi in question. Mori rose a brow. Tamaki stuffed his fingers into his ears, humming a song and insisting he couldn't hear anything. At all. "Haruhi's into guys with glasses!" the older twin announced to everyone in the restaurant, though it was just meant for his table. His smile turned slightly evil. "I bet you really like Kyoya, then."
Haruhi squeaked, unsure of what to say. It wasn't like she could do anything other than choke on her rice.
Kyoya rose a brow, now, too. "I wouldn't say I'm surprised," he said in his low, calm, velvety voice. "Ootori men are extremely desirable."
Tamaki squawked. "Mom!"
Meanwhile, Haruhi spat out her rice and glared at the Shadow King. "The hell!?"
Kaoru grinned wolfishly. "You two are adorable. Glasses. Level-headedness. Why, the only better pair I could find for our Haruhi would be myself."
Honey grinned widely, childishly, innocently. "Haru-chan and Kyo-chan, sitting in a tree!" he sang, instantly enamored with the idea. "K-I-S-S-I-N-G!"
"Stop it, stop it, stop it!" Tamaki insisted. He looked about ready to tear his hair out, his blue eyes wide. "Nasty, evil twins! Pairing my daughter up with her mommy. Evil, nasty twins!"
"You said that already," Kaoru said.
"We know we're evil, nasty, evil twins," Hikaru said.
"You know, I'm starting to agree with him!" Haruhi shouted, stabbing a finger in the Frenchman's direction. She snapped her attention back to the twins. "Why in hell do you need to know?"
The twins shrugged. "Why not?" Kaoru answered.
"You know ours," Hikaru continued.
Meanwhile, in the background, Honey kept singing that infernal song, cuddling up with Usa-chan. "First comes love, then comes marriage, then some the Honey in the Honey carriage!"
Haruhi shot a glare at all of the Host Club members. "Yes, it's glasses!" she growled at them. "Are you two happy now?"
The auburn-haired twins high-fived. "Yes!" they shouted in victory.
"Evil, evil, vile twins!" Tamaki mutters to himself.
"Can we have cake now?" Honey asked.
Haruhi sighed, listening as the twins celebrated their victory and trying to keep her blush down as Kyoya scrutinized her as if she were some particularly interesting physics problem. "There's no cake here," she said.
"Oh." There was a pause. "They should get cake! Cake would make this place so much better!"
"You think cake makes everything better," Kyoya said, pushing his glasses up slowly, dark onyx eyes still on Haruhi. There was a slight tilt in his lips when the blush spreading across her face darkened.
It was later in the day that the boys were saying their goodbyes to Haruhi. Honey and Mori were the first to leave; flowing soon after were the twins; then Tamaki reluctantly left Haruhi to the Shadow King. Haruhi had just made fresh tea and had served Kyoya, silently wondering why he hadn't left yet. Not that she didn't enjoy his company, simply that he was usually the first to leave, excusing himself with work or family matters, whatever got him out of this commoner abode.
There was silence as Kyoya took a sip of Haruhi's commoner tea. It wasn't rich and it wasn't smooth, but somehow it tasted perfect. Unconventional, but perfect. "Glasses, huh?" he said after a moment.
Kyoya smirked, and pulled off his own glasses, leaving the world beyond two feet looking blurry and undefined. "Am I less attractive now?"
"I said shut up."
"Is that a no?"
Haruhi grumbled something under her breath, no doubt an insult, and took a swing of her tea. She hoped to hell Ranka would come home soon. This was no doubt going to be awkward. Then, deciding to push his own tactics against him, she asked, "How about you? Brown eyes?" She batted her own pair of brown eyes.
Kyoya grinned. "Yes, brown eyes." He took another sip of the unconventional tea. "Chocolate brown eyes."
Haruhi rolled her eyes of the exact same shade, figuring he was trying to intimidate her. It was working, of course, but she wouldn't let him know that.
"Tell me something, Haruhi," the Shadow King ordered. He put his glasses back on as to see the bright blush that would no doubt spread across her face when he asked. "When did you first start liking glasses?"
"That is absolutely none of your business!"
"I started falling for brown eyes the second I saw yours."
Haruhi sputtered, tea spilling out onto her jeans and cursing at both the heat and having ruined what the gift Kaoru had given her for her birthday last February. "W—what?" she squawked.
A sly smirk crossed Kyoya's face. He leaned across the coffee table, reaching out to hold Haruhi's chin—it was soft and warm between his fingers, womanly. Her chocolate brown eyes were wide with surprise, making her seem even more doe-eyed than usual. His smirk widened. His lips brushed over hers, a featherlight touch. Her lips were soft and malleable under his and he wanted more. But he pulled away and stood up, keeping his sly little smirk on his face. "Goodbye, Haruhi."
He started for the door, but Haruhi's voice stopped him. She murmured at him, almost soundlessly, the day that she'd broken the vase, the day they'd met. Kyoya shot a grin over his shoulder and, hands shoved into his pocket, walked away, closing the door behind him.
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