Chasing Demons

chapter 11

Throughout the next few days Bethild left me alone with Banner for most of the time only coming in once or twice with food or to help me heal she's such a wonderful lady, I owe her so much for all the help she has given me throughout my life. But for now all I could think about was Banner beside me and feeling safe and comfort once more just as it had been before being dragged back here. This was where I wanted to be more then anywhere else throughout all nine realms, I wanted to be here next to the only person to ever care this much for me, the only person to ever make me feel safe and wanted. Now I see that while this heart might be broken it's far from useless, without it I wouldn't be able to feel this care, wouldn't be able to love Banner or have something to give him. This heart was all that I had left but it was also all that I needed as long as I could feel the way I did now then I would gladly give up everything else but all I had was this beaten down heart of mine and that was all that I wanted.

To see if I did indeed have enough strength to use enough power to get me and Banner back on Earth I practiced a few simple tricks just to bring my magic back up to the surface, through my imprisonment I had learned how to hide my magic deep down until I was free and then I could bring back to the surface for use. I tried something really simple that I had never done before but seeing Banner's eyes light up as tiny green butterflies fluttered out of green sparks and danced around the room felt amazing seeing him watch the animated butterflies and marvel at such a simple trick.

"DO you like this trick Banner?"
"They're beautiful Loki." he looked down "But your eyes are prettier."

He pushed a strand of hair from my face and I leaned against his chest comforted by the sound of his heart slowly beating, I closed my eyes for a moment and felt very calmed. My eyes began to close as the rising and lowering as well as the soothing sound of his heart beat calmed me down and I began to doze off. There was nothing that could possibly make this moment better, I was next to the only one who loved me and the only one I loved, he was going to protect me and I knew that he would still be there when I woke up, his arm still around me as it always was when I woke from a dream.

"Get some rest Loki." Banner said lightly kissing the top of my head as I fell into the darkness prepared for anything to happen for I knew that what I would see would be nothing more then a dream and that the no matter what they said they were just voices that couldn't feel, they didn't know how this felt, they could never understand so why should I listen to them any more? What truth could they possible tell me after all they only drove me towards suicide, they were no better then Odin they were only trying to tear me and Banner apart well not any more, no now no one was going to seperate us no matter what I would never be pulled away from Banner's side.

When the darkness faded away I found myself in an open field underneath a big oak tree with Banner by my side. We were staring up at the sky as it was streaked with shades of pinks and light purples, the sun was beginning to set over Brooklyn harbor and there was no one around us just the way I liked it to be. This I knew was our future, someday we really would be lying under this tree watching the sky as the sun slowly set over the harbor coloring the sky with thousands of colors. Someday we would both be happy not knowing pain or sadness ever again, no instead we would both be happy, safe, and best of all we would be free from everything that had haunted us. TOgether we would destroy the demons, and ignore the voices, together we would move on from all that has stopped us from gaining what we've both wanted.

For the first time in years I actually enjoyed sleeping, I enjoyed dreaming knowing that this time I saw a more realistic future with Banner, one that I knew would happen for sure and one that I was looking forward towards. I didn't want to wake from this dream but I knew that there was a better dream awaiting me back down on the very realm that I had tried so hard to destroy and conqure, a dream that would become reality as soon as I opened my eyes and steeped foot off of this hell. I had found my savior, my "angle" as the mortals call people such as Banner and now he was taking me to a place that I could call home, a place where I was wanted and belonged, a place where I could show the world that I had changed, a place where I didn't have to hide and run away from everyone because I was afraid. I never thought that a place like that exsisted but now I see that in order to have gained all of this I had to lose everything that I had but this frozen heart, I had to try and prove myself, had to be stopped and tortured relentlessly, all that in order to help Thor and prove the world that I was changed, only to escape and find Banner to find that there was still hope for me. Everything that has happened to me so far was a simple sacrifice in order to gain so much more I believe it's known as "equivilant exchange" to the mortals who have tried to combine magic and science.

But I knew that this wasn't equivilant, I could never give up enough in order to equal what I had gained but maybe that's what they wanted, some force was giving me a break. Perhaps it was my mother still looking out for me knowing that I had suffered enough and now was showing me the light at the end of the tunnle even from the dead she was guiding me to everything that I had ever truly wanted, I didn't want a throne, a crown, or even to be Thor's equal, I just wanted someone who loved me, someone who cared for me and wanted me to be there by their side, to feel exactly just as I did now whenever I was with Banner. This was what I had wanted and this is what I had recieved after all my years of suffereing and I would gladly go through all of it again knowing that in the end this would be my reward.

We got up very early the next morning hoping to get away before everyone in Asgard wakes for surly then it would be most difficult to escape the eyes of the guards that knew of my return and had thought I was locked up, abandoned and suffering, I almost laughed at how I imagined the look on their faces as they find out that I am no longer in that cell.

"It was a pleasure meeting you doctor Banner." she shook Banner's hand and then she turned towards me "Don't let us meet this way again Loki." She pulled me into a tight embrace and whispered in my ear "Be safe my prince."

With that we left the city that once I had called home but now had turned into the true prison that it was and I was leaving it all behind, I was finally going to find freedom and this time I knew that it was for real, that I was truly safe and that all my struggling was finally over, I had won this brutal war that had left me scared and broken but now I was going to heal knowing that it was finally all over.

"Are you ready to go home Loki?"

Home? That was right I was going home, a place that I had never had before until my meeting with Banner and only now did I see that I was truly going home for the first time. I was going to a place that fit the very word itself, a place where I belonged, and a place where I wanted to stay. I took hold of his hand and kissed it lightly.

"I am if you are."

He noded and I closed my eyes, imagining Banner's home, I saw the living room, the sun peeking through the closed blinds and I felt my body dissolve into the sky but as soon as I opened my eyes we were no longer in Asgard but back on Earth in Banner's living room.

"Welcome home Loki."

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