Chapter 18: I'm Not Doing This!!!
For me the worst thing at the moment is feeling like crying but not being able to. I know running doesn’t solve anything but I couldn’t be in that room arguing over and death situation.
S: Edward, thank goodness I finally caught up to you. They don’t lie when they say you are one of the fastest.
E: Why are you following me?
S: We need to talk.
E: I don’t like your tone of voice! (He said assertively)
S: I’m not going to stop because you don’t like the way that I’m talking.
E: I don’t want to talk about it.
S: I might not understand what you’re feeling right now but I know Jacob.
E: Are you going to stay like that? (He said referring to Sam’s phased form)
S: Yes, I’m on patrol.
E: Oh, okay.
S: So tell me what’s wrong?
E: He wants me to choose the baby over him is something goes wrong when the baby is being born.
S: We once saw a man being told that he had choose between his wife and child, complications with birth. He took so long deciding that both died. He later killed himself because he felt guilty for their deaths and Jacob… (He left for Edward to complete)
E: And Jacob doesn’t want me to go through that pain.
S: Yes. So you see Edward, he’s not doing it to be selfish but only because he loves and cares about you too much.
E: But how will I be able to live without him. I will NEVER find someone like him again.
S: Edward, calm down nothing might even happen.
E: I know but if it comes down to it I still have no idea what to do.
S: Follow your heart.
E: Oh, the heart that’s no longer beating?
S: No, the heart that made you love Jacob.
E: I’ll have to dig deep for that on, keep it under lock and key.
S: You should open it up every once in a while, it can come in handy.
E: Not when you’re a vampire who’s going to outlive his Husband by a few million years.
S: What do you mean?
E: If Jacob dies from old age I’ll be alone again.
S: Ah Edward, Jacob’s not going anywhere.
E: Not now but he will.
S: Edward wolves phase as long as their close to vampires.
E: I know that.
S: Do you also know that as long as a wolf phases that they don’t age?
E: So as long as he’s with me he won’t age?
E: Oh my goodness, I’m so happy.
S: He’s not.
E: What do you mean?
S: Let me show you. (He said showing Edward a thought he received from Quil and Paul a minute ago of Jacob in their bedroom curled up and crying on the floor.
E: Oh my. I feel sick. Excuse me but ‘m going to mu Husband.
S: Only reason I followed you. Let’s go.
I wish I was incapable of crying all these tears are just the worse and the fact that I’m pregnant and very emotional isn’t’ helping at all.
Es: Jacob dear can we please come in?
J: I want to be alone.
R: Now be alone with us.
R: Please Jake.
J: Come in.
Es: Thank you dear.
R: Jake let’s help you. You can’t lie like that in the floor.
J: Why? I don’t have any reason to stand.
A: Jake, the baby may not be able to deal with the cold.
J: Actually it won’t affect it, if it’s a vampire it won’t feel anything and if it’s a werewolf its body temp will prevent it from getting cold.
Es: No Jacob it’s a baby. It’s your body and you need to take care of him/her.
R: Tell us what’s wrong.
J: I’m pretty sure you heard everything already.
R: No, I mean tell us what’s wrong with you?
J: I miss Edward.
A: Don’t worry he’ll be back.
J: But that’s not the problem.
Es: Then what is?
J: I imprinted on Edward so every minute that he’s rejecting me my wolf is in pain, putting me in pain.
Es: He hasn’t rejected you, honey.
J: Well it feels like he did.
R: Is there anything we could bring you?
J: Uh after you help me up can you get me something to eat please?
A: There’s the Jacob we know and love.
J: Ahw you love me?
J: Thank you.
R: Now hurry up and pop put that baby. I want to meet my little niece or nephew already.
Es: Rosalie, there are still three months later.
J: Noooooooo, this baby (He said putting both hands on his stomach) is already the size of a nine month baby, Carlisle told us that we could do the C-section any time now so we decide on next week Friday, six days from today.
A: When were you planning on telling us?
J: Well we’re planning in telling you today before all of this happened.
R: We need to get things ready. There’s no more time.
J: You still have a week.
A: Don’t worry we’ll get it done.
R: You saw it?
A: If I could see Jake I’d know what he was having.
J: Then I guess it is a good thing coz I want to be surprised.
Es: That’s sweet dear. Now let’s go get you your food.
I know my Edward and I know that he will come back to me no matter how mad he is right now. Now all I have to do is sit and hope that the girls hurry up with the food.
J: That was fast, come in. oh, Edward I thought you were Alice, Rosalie and Esme’ they went to get me something to eat.
E: Jacob, let’s go somewhere to talk.
E: Anywhere ya decide.
J: Ed, what’s wrong with you?
E: What ya mean?
J: You leave without saying anything now you come back wanting to go somewhere. (Something’s not right with Edward he thought. Edward?) (He can’t read my thoughts anymore) Edward?
J: What happened when you left, you’re different.
E: Nothing happened I just want to go somewhere wit my baby.
J: (Baby?) Who else is coming?
E: Uh the black wolf.
J: Sam’s coming along?
E: Yeah Sam’s coming along.
J: (I guess if Sam’s coming than it’s okay but I’m still wondering what’s up with him, isn’t the Edward I know)
E: Okay then let’s go.
J: Uhim, you have to help me dummy.
E: What did you just call me!?
J: Sorry, I was just kidding.
E: Oh sorry then baby.
He helped me and we went downstairs on our way to the door but we stopped when I said: Let me go tell the girls something quick.
E: Okay, I’ll be waiting.
J: Guys you don’t have to rush the food I’m quickly going out with Edward.
R: Who is going with you?
Es: Okay dear, I hope you two work it out.
J: Thank you me too. We can go.
E: Okay. (He said pulling Jacobs arm.)
J: (With all the pulling I accidentally cut my finger and normally it would already have closed but coz I’m pregnant my wolf side doesn’t work so I decide to smear it on the rocks, trees and leaves alongside the trail that we’re taking) Where are we going?
E: Shh it’s a surprise.
After Sam showed me how Jacob looked I did the only thing I could and ran to him with Sam right on my tail. He wasn’t chasing me and we both needed to get back so he just followed swiftly behind me. When I came in I had one thing on my mind and that was to find Jacob and talk to him about what he wants but something didn’t feel right, I ran past everyone looking at me strongly without even bothering to read their thoughts in search of Jacob.
E: Jake we need to… (He stopped abruptly. Jake’s not here. He isn’t in our room and I was starting to get agitated. So I decided to go downstairs again. Guys, where is Jacob?
R: What do you mean? You just left with him about half an hour ago.
E: No, I’ve been running for the last three hours.
Es: Edward honey, you came to take him out and said that Sam was going as protection.
S: Esme’ honestly, I’ve been behind Edward since he left and we were on our way back for him to talk to Jake and me to continue patrolling.
B: What’s with the commotion in here? (He asked rolling in) Oh Edward back so soon, where’s Jacob?
E: Oh no, no,no.