Raze It To The Rocks
Raze It To The Rocks
Bart pinched the bridge of his nose; he was exhausted and looking forward to a few hours of sleep in his own bed. Opening the door to the suite, he was greeted with the cry of, "Oh, fuck… Chuck!" Rolling his eyes, he entered his bedroom, glancing at the clock, 1:35AM. Seriously, his son was something else.
Dressing the next morning, he heard them going at it again. Good lord. He had heard them in his sleep, as well. There was no way Chuck had been doing the same girl all night long, despite the fact that his son was once again crying out "Blair" like he had several weeks before. Bart had no idea what Blair Waldorf was doing to his son, but it was rather exceptional to witness.
He was standing in the kitchen with his coffee, reading the paper, when his son's bedroom door opened. A petite brunette exited, wearing a lovely little dress. And that's when it hit him. That was no prostitute. It was Blair Waldorf. His mind tried to absorb this information as he watched her turn, startled to find the presence of another person in the suite.
"Good morning, Mr. Bass." Impeccable manners swung into motion, saving her from running out of the room, as she would have much preferred to do.
"Good morning, Ms. Waldorf."
"I was just… bringing Chuck his bow tie, for the ball tonight." Her cheeks were flushed from being discovered.
"My son's bow tie, for the ball?" Bart wanted more information, but refused to ask or appear curious.
"Yes, I wanted to make sure it was the same shade of pink as my dress. Such a little thing, but it can make such a difference in the way a couple appears together. Don't you agree?" Blair could not help but ramble a little, as this was so uncomfortable.
"Quite." Bart's eyes shifted from Blair, to his son, as he entered the room, the top of his silk pajamas open. Chuck was so distracted, he had not yet registered that Bart was even in the room, his eyes hungrily consuming the sight of Blair. He wrapped his arms around her waist, kissing her neck, before she cleared her throat, trying to draw his attention to the fact that they were not alone. Bart was simply amused, and a bit intrigued to see his son's behavior. "Good morning, Chuck."
Chuck's arms dropped and he stepped away from Blair as though he had been caught doing something very wrong. "Good morning."
Blair looked at the two men and could feel the tension in the room. Part of her wanted to stay, to help Chuck. But she also knew that this was between the two of them, and the most she could do was let him know she was there for him, if he needed her. She took his hand, and squeezed it. When he turned to look at her, she gave him a reassuring smile before kissing his cheek, and whispering, "Be strong."
"It was nice to see you again, Mr. Bass." And with that she departed, just in time for her phone to buzz at her. It was Hazel- time for the day to begin!
Chuck buttoned up his shirt and joined his father in having some coffee.
"So there's a ball tonight?" Bart spoke, still looking down at the paper.
"Yes, Blair is the chairwoman."
"Quite an… accomplished young lady, isn't she?"
Chuck flushed at the insinuation in his father's voice.
"I should commend you for seducing such a creature. She's given me hope that you may just grow into a decent person after all. No jail visits in months, no calls from the school, and Charles, matching your bow tie? Well, I never..." Bart chuckled and closed the paper.
There was a knock at the door. Bart answered it as he departed, another chuckle rumbling as he glanced at his son.
"Hey, man!" It was Nate.
Chuck was so disturbed by his father's comments that a good smoke and his best friend were a welcome distraction. They spent the day just being guys, smoking, making crude jokes, and reliving some of their wilder expeditions. Occasionally his father's words would bubble up again... he made it sound like Blair would mold him, make him into another rich boring Upper East Side snot. Chuck Bass was no one's masterpiece.
Blair spent the morning at the Plaza, finalizing every last detail of the ball. By the time she returned home, she was exhausted. She collapsed onto her bed, realizing a nap might just be in order after, she smiled at herself, getting less than the recommended eight hours of sleep last night. She rolled over and hid her head in the pillows. Oh! What is it he does to me? He makes me feel so… Blair could not think of a word for it. She just felt overwhelmed with happiness at the mere thought of Chuck. She fell asleep for a little while, dreaming of being in his arms as he whirled her across the dance floor tonight.
Dorota woke her with a light lunch before Blair began the long process of dressing for the ball. She showered with meticulous attention to detail, and then had Dorota work on her hair until she was satisfied. The maid left and she let her robe drop to the floor. Slipping the thong into place, she smiled; thinking how the nude satin set was one of many Chuck had bought for her in Paris. Sitting at her vanity, she rolled her stockings up her thighs, thinking of Chuck's hands on her, how he would pull these off of her later tonight, or be so ensnared he would not bother with them- the first time around, at least.
Turning, Blair looked at the long pale pink dress that lay on her bed. She reached up and pulled the long dress on, sighing as the cool silk dropped down, clinging to her body. Her heart thudded in her chest, thinking how Chuck picked this just for her, and she felt as though she was wrapped in more than just silk. She turned and looked at her reflection in the mirror. She gasped a little, smiling at how she glowed. The diamond twinkled around her neck and she realized this was all Chuck's; this was how he made her feel. She wanted to be his, all his, and he had claimed her from top to bottom, inside and out. From the lingerie she wore, to her dress, and the diamond around her neck, they were all Chuck's, just like her.
The boys began to dress for the ball. Nate noticed Chuck putting on his bow tie. He laughed, "What is this? I know you've got that whole sartorial thing going on, but this?"
"Hey, it's a perfectly nice bow tie. And hurry up, we have to pick up Blair soon."
"We're picking up Blair? I thought you'd just take an escort like always. Dude, I get that she must be some lay, but damn," Nate shook his head, "I knew something was off with that bow tie, that's not you, that's her! What are you, her boyfriend now?" he scoffed in disappointment.
Boyfriend? Chuck could not handle it. Part of him was surprised it had taken this long to hear the words, but most of him was repulsed. Boyfriend. "Chuck Bass doesn't do girlfriends. I'm just having some fun, Nathaniel."
Nate watched his friend as he perfected the knot of the pink bow tie, shaking his head, his voice dripping with sarcasm, "Who knows, maybe this is what Chuck Bass looks like when he's fallen in love?"
Chuck's eyes went hard as he met his friend's gaze in the mirror, "I don't know what love is. It is of no concern to me, what would I do with some love struck female?" And no one sure as hell could ever love me. But thinking on the way Blair looked at him, they way they kissed, her smile when she saw him. Could she maybe love him?
The two boys were quiet as they left the suite and took the limo to pick-up Blair. Chuck was relieved when he exited the limo alone to enter her building. He and Nate had never argued about anything. The strain was disconcerting.
Blair came down the stairs moments after he stepped in the foyer, and Chuck swallowed hard, his mouth going dry the moment he saw her. Her beautiful curls were swept up and cascaded down to tease her neck. His diamond glimmered at her throat and the pale pink dress he had given her... He could hardly breathe. The dress was no doubt beautiful, but the way it caressed and hugged her body perfectly… Oh fuck, this had been the problem all along. Her, and all the inexplicable things she did to him.
She was smiling at him and she reached out, taking his hand, "Hi, handsome."
He could not escape her pull and he cupped her face, smiling as he leaned down and kissed her. Happiness fluttered inside of him at the feel of her. He let it fill him as he pulled her into the elevator, still kissing. It was a challenge collecting his cool exterior as they slid into the limo.
Chuck watched as Nate looked at Blair. "You look lovely, Blair, that is a beautiful dress."
Blair blushed and fidgeted, smoothing invisible creases in the silk, "It was a gift…."
"Really?" Nate raised an eyebrow in question at Chuck. Chuck proceeded to look out the window.
Blair was too happy to notice the strain of awkwardness between the two boys, "Are you excited for the ball, Nate?"
"I think it will be… interesting, to see everyone interacting outside of school together." Nate gave Chuck another rather pointed look. Chuck pretended not to see him.
Blair was saying something about the music when Chuck turned to look at her. Just the sight of her made his heart quicken and his hands itch to touch her. He caught Nate watching him and turned to gaze out the window once more. At last, they had arrived at The Plaza.
The trio exited the limo, and instantly Blair was on his arm. Nate had stalked off to greet some friends, leaving Chuck to be pulled through a procession of greeting Blair's acquaintances and committee members. Serena was one of the first to greet them.
"My, don't you two make quite the pair!" she smiled at Chuck and hugged her best friend.
"I'll catch up with you more, later?" She turned to another friend, but not before adding, "Oh, and love the bow tie!" with a wink.
It was tedious meeting all these pointless, annoying people and Chuck tried to say as little as possible. People were congratulating Blair on the ball, other friends came by to simply say hello. Most of them had the same response when they saw her on his arm. He felt Hazel probably had the best reaction out of all of them when she came to greet Blair.
"This is way cooler than that stupid Planetarium. And I told you the caterer wouldn't mess up the desserts. Oh," Hazel's eyes gazed up at Chuck's face, "Your date is… Chuck Bass," she whispered, the words tumbling out of her mouth and her eyes wide at seeing the pair truly together.
Blair was so sublimely happy with everything that people's reaction to Chuck was positively lost on her, "That is a lovely dress, Hazel. Is it not one of my mother's originals?"
Hazel sputtered, "Yes, I," she glanced up at Chuck again as Penelope intervened on the group.
"My, my, Blair Waldorf and Chuck Bass, in the light of day! Snapshots and Gossip Girl rumors are one thing, but I can't believe you got him to bring you to the ball. I can only imagine what you had to do to convince him," Penelope dropped, giving them both a rather disdainful look.
"Penelope, it's so good to see you made it. You'll have to excuse me, but Chuck Bass is more of a gentleman than the long line of guys we all know you've taken into the bathroom at PJ Clarke's. And P, peach is really just not your color," Blair countered, looking distastefully at the other girl's dress.
Penelope began to blush crimson as she scowled at Blair, "I can wear peach! And how can you defend someone like…"
Chuck was not about to listen to this peach colored harpy attack Blair anymore so he cut Penelope off, mid-sentence. Not with words, but by pulling Blair, her entire silk-clad body, against him and kissing her deeply.
There it was again. Those butterflies, fluttering so hard his mind went fuzzy and his breathing turned shallow. This. This was his problem and his solution all in one. How she made him feel this way, he almost did not care. He wanted to take her back to the limo, or the bathroom, or just… anywhere; he wanted to be with her, consumed by this feeling she caused in him.
When they finally pulled apart, Penelope's jaw was on the ground, but he did not notice for he was entranced by the stars in Blair's eyes. They turned to move on, leaving Penelope in their wake, when Chuck caught Nate's gaze. A cold look of disapproval flashed in his best friend's blue eyes. Boyfriend.
Blair was pulling at Chuck's arm now, ever so slightly, towards the dance floor, "You know," she teased him, "this is a dance. Don't think you were going to get out of this."
Their presence demanded the attention of the entire room as Blair pulled him onto the dance floor, just as a waltz began. She was looking up at him, so incredibly happy, though he could still feel Nate's eyes bearing down on him full of distain.
Blair's heart beat wildly in her chest as she looked up at him. Blissful. It was the only word for this level of perfect happiness. Her cheeks were pink without the help of make-up. His arms held her tight, and Blair glowed. This is it, she thought, how can there be anything more than this? This feeling… she wanted to dance like this with him forever.
Chuck had a small smile on his face, for he was giving her such happiness. She was light and beautiful in his arms, but he felt disconnected now. Nate, his father, the way everyone had looked at him with her tonight. I'm Chuck Bass and you're Blair Waldorf. What had he really expected to happen between them? She had said once that she did not know how their story would end. However, he did. He always had. This happiness, it could not be real- it could never have lasted. He was Chuck Bass and Blair deserved someone who could give her real happiness- a real relationship. That was not him; he did not know love, how could he love anyone? The butterflies she made him feel were cruel and her allure made him yearn for an unrealistic ideal. Chuck Bass… in love.
She felt radiant in his arms. Her heart swelled as he spun her out, then pulled her close again. The song slowed near its end but Blair looked so beautiful in his arms, he didn't want to let her go just yet. With the final cords, Chuck leaned in and kissed her, so tenderly.
Blair felt lightheaded, her body tingled as he held her, his lips warm and tender against hers. When he pulled away she gazed into his deep dark eyes, thinking she could spend the rest of her life lost in them. Her breath rushed from her lungs, "I love you."
His head snapped back and he swallowed hard, his jaw flexing as he stared into her dark eyes, searching. He could see the bliss, feel it radiating from her: she had said it. He had suspected… seen it in her eyes, felt it when he kissed her, but now, it was real, burning in his ears. The cruel butterflies fluttered hard: love, yes, love! He came apart, fighting the butterflies, freezing them out- how could she do this? How could she make him feel such things? Her power over him was too much; Blair would mold him- he was no one's masterpiece.
"That's too bad," dripped from his lips, hard and bitter. He pulled completely away from her, "No one feels that way about Chuck Bass."
The blissful feeling suddenly fled from Blair as his response stripped her bare, leaving her cold and naked. Her mind was fuzzy, full of static, and she furrowed her brow, "But…"
Her confusion set him off. She had thought he loved her? That Chuck Bass actually loved her? What had she done to him that love had suddenly become a possibility? Who knows, maybe this is what Chuck Bass looks like when he's fallen in love? Remembering Nate's words made him sick. He was disgusted with himself and rancor spiraled through him at all she had caused him to do and feel. Now she was expecting the impossible from him. He could not love, and no one should or could feel that way for him- there was no place for love in his life. He did not need love. Her love. Clearly he had gone too far with her, Nate was right, his father, everyone was right.
"But what?" He sneered at her, "It was a game. A challenge. It was fun for a while, but now you've just gone and ruined it. Did you really think I was going to melt into some prince charming before your eyes and say it back?" he laughed harshly, mocking her. "No. You're just another virgin I've turned into a whore. It was delicious wiping away your purity. I loved watching how dark and dirty our little pristine princess turns with her thighs wrapped around me," he paused reaching out and dragging a finger along the side of her face, "begging for me to fuck you and make you cry for me as you come."
He ridiculed her, and his words shattered all of her illusions as though they were made of finely spun crystal. She felt her chest caving in, tears filled her eyes, and she gasped a sob as her hand came to cover her mouth at the horror of it all.
Everyone had turned to watch them; they had all heard what Chuck said. Blair wanted to collapse on the floor, but somehow, she found some strength and she fled from the ballroom.
Chuck's eyes were hard as he gazed out into the crowd. He caught sight of Serena staring at him, a blonde sentinel, her blue eyes cold as she slowly shook her head at him before leaving to find her friend.
Hurrying outside, Serena was just in time to see Blair slip into a limo; she had shut her out.
"Home!" Blair shouted at the driver. She felt disgusting; dirty… she had to get this dress off! Returning home, she rushed to her room, pulling at the material that was clinging to her skin. Sobbing, she was hysterical as she grabbed a pair of scissors from her desk. Dropping to the floor, scissors in hand, she chaotically cut the gown from her body.
Blair wailed as her heart broke more with every tear of the fabric. It was a game! I knew better…. I knew better! I… I thought he cared for me… didn't he? Memories of him blurred in her mind, his smile, his warm eyes, his hands and mouth on her, the joy of his body filling her when they… had sex? Made love? What the fuck was that if it wasn't love! A game… a challenge…. that I lost.
A memory rose to the surface of her mind, the image so bright, she could see them before her, standing in this very room: "You are going to beg, Blair Waldorf, for me to not just take your virginity, but to fuck you senseless and give you the greatest pleasure you will ever experience." I lost.
The crying left her exhausted; her emotions had drained her. The world weighed heavy on her shoulders and she did not care enough to even try to move to her bed. Blair curled up on the floor, shreds of the tattered dress- her tattered heart, strewn around her, tears still effortlessly streaming down her face.
Her eyes were hot, and her eyelids felt heavy as they closed. She felt numb as her mind thought of nothing but Chuck. How she had been shocked and angry the first time he had kissed her. Lingerie. The feel of his hand holding hers as they walked through the park. Peonies. I see you. His hands on her hips. The way he looked at her on her birthday. His smirk. Reading in the library together. Paris. All of Paris. Make me yours. The feel of him, buried deep inside of her. You will love me… some day.
Serena arrived awhile later. She roused Blair, helping her up from the mess on the floor to her bed. Picking up the bits and pieces of the gown, she placed them in the box the once whole dress had arrived in. Her own heart ached for her friend. What had happened was cruel, how could anyone be so unfeeling? Anger seethed in her, and she wrote a note for Dorota, placing it with the box in the hallway. Only then did she crawl into bed with Blair, stroking the girl's hair, watching over her until her own eyes were weighed down with sleep.
Chuck awoke the next morning, hung over, two girls wrapped around him, feeling the hard edge of the coke he had snorted the night before. Removing himself from the bed, he sought out a bottle of his favorite scotch. A large box lay on the counter, it looked familiar, but his mind was much too hazy to know why. Pulling the lid aside, the scent of Blair wafted forth as his eyes fell on the dress. He frantically took in the sight of it, a dress no more, only a pile of jagged scraps of fabric. Burying his hands in the feel of them, his mouth went dry as the distorted memory of last night tried to restore itself. Oh god.
AN: Chapter title taken from The Very Last Valkyrie's fic, where she flips the situation that is season one. Sadly on hiatus.
See my Tumblr for the dress Blair wears. The song I wrote their dance to is Sarah McLachlan's Last Dance.
This line is in memorium to the two days, two headaches, about ten hours on Google Chat, and the bottle of hard cider I drank, that were the edits to this chapter. The climax required perfection, and Georgia and I settled for nothing less than the best we could do. I know how much you want to hit the next button, but do consider pausing to review?