Chapter 1. Where It Changes.
“Dawnie I’m sorry. Oh god. I’m sorry. I'm so sorry, I’m sorry, I’m so so sorry. I’m sorry” Willow sobbed again and again, Spike, Dawn and Buffy stopped and looked back at the hysteric witch. Spike gave a nod to Buffy, but she shook her head. He glanced at the redhead, then looked away and they walked off and were soon long gone. There was no one around to hear her and no one who did was likely to care.
She lay there as it all came crashing down on her. She'd brought Dawn to Rack and had gotten her hurt. Now Dawn surely hated her. Buffy definitely hated her for doing that to Dawn. Xander probably wouldn’t even look at her and Anya would do whatever Xander did. And Tara would never come back.
Tara would never come back.
Then Willow's friends supposed hatred became her own. The witch decided something, that no matter how much any of her friends hated her she would hate herself three times as much for causing them all so much pain.
She felt like an eternity had passed before she tried to get up, but in reality it was only about an hour.
The still sobbing witch put her hands at either side of her and pushed herself up. WIllow was shaking uncontrollably but somehow managed to stand. Every sob crashed into her furiously and she had to brace herself against a pillar to keep from re-entering her relationship with the cold ground.
She looked down at the base of the pillar and realized it was the pillar Dawn had sat down at while Buffy had fought the red demon Willow had unknowingly summoned. A new wave rushed into her, filling every fillable space. She put her head in her hands.
“What did I do?” She asked herself through her hands, her words barely audible. Seconds later her hands fell to her sides, and she answered herself with horror in her eyes as she realized what she was about to say was true. “I ruined everything that matters to me.” She slid down onto the cold concrete. Her hands lay on the ground, her knees were bent and her head rested against the pillar. She sobbed and sobbed and sobbed. Staring at the ceiling for a long while, then her voice broke the sob filled air. “What am I going to do?”
It didn't take Willow more than a moment to find an answer.
The witch moved her head from the pillar and pushed herself up, tears streamed down her face and quiet sobs resonated from her pertly closed mouth.
Her voice cut through the near total silence like a recently sharpened knife. “I’m going to end this.”